O, the comfort we feel

When we finish a meal

Consisting of rice cakes and whey;

Because beyond question

There's no indigestion

At the end of a Meatless day.

When the "buck" dough doth rise

From y'East to the skies

And hot griddled pancakes—oh, say!

With sausages frying

There's no use denying

Your welcome, O Wheatless day.

When the house is afrost

Without fuel: its cost

Is more than we're able to pay:

With our hearts all aglow

We can thaw ice or snow

Making light of a Heatless day.

When there's discord with wife

There's a shadow on life

That once was so sunny and gay;

But billing and cooing

Subordinate stewing

When will beefsteak and ham

Not be sold by the gram?

How long will these high prices stay?

When the bad Profiteers

Show contrition and tears

At the dawn of a Cheatless day.

When our Soldiers in France

Do their Indian dance

And scalp all the Huns in the fray,

The Kaiser will holler,

With rope for a collar,

At the end of his Ruthless day!