  Booksellers and Postmasters usually receive subscriptions. Subscriptions sent direct to the publishers should be accompanied by Post-office Money Order or Draft. HARPER & BROTHERS, New York, N.Y. EXPLAINED. "Why, Mandie, what are you doing with your doll?" "I'm going to take her to the house show." "But why do you have her done up in that extraordinary way?" "Because I saw in the paper that all the best people went in a private box." Mamma. "Why, Harry, did your teacher send you home?" Harry. "Yes; she wanted to give me a set of books a fellow used last term, and I wouldn't take them, 'cause he got all there was to learn out of them." Teacher. "Why, George, John tells me you knocked him down. Did you?" George (happily remembering one of his lessons). "No, marm; it was the force of gravitation that made him fall. I only pushed him." Father. "Now, Tom, you should know how to defend yourself. You see, this is the first position, and so. Now don't be afraid; strike out with the gloves." Father (fifteen minutes later). "Confound it, how was I to know he had been taking lessons at the school gymnasium." PHILOSOPHY.WALTER G. NICHOLS.A puppy who had chased his tail A TIMELY QUESTION.Horace. "Father, why do they 'prefer charges' against policemen for acting improperly? Why don't they make 'em pay cash?" Some years ago linemen were stringing a telegraph wire through a rural district, containing inhabitants that seldom came in contact with the outer world. A resident of the place, an old farmer, more curious than his neighbors, put many questions to the linemen, and after a while gained some confused ideas about its use, principally one, that the wire was put up to send messages on. Wishing to send his son John, who lived in the city, a pair of new boots, he thought it would be a cheap way of doing it to hang them on the wire—and this he did. Shortly after, a tramp coming along saw them there, and as they fitted him, he took them and left his own in their place. The next morning the old farmer seeing the tramp's shoes went about among the neighbors telling of the wonderful wire and how he had sent his son John the new boots, and John had not only got them, but had sent his old pair back. Teacher. "Tommy, how dare you waste your drawing-paper—covering it with ridiculous pictures?" Tommy. "I didn't need the paper to draw on, 'cause I was drawing on my imagination." Teacher. "Now suppose there were five boys going skating, and they had only three pairs of skates; how many boys would have to look on?" Boy. "I know; the two that got the worst of the fight." THE GREATEST OF THE LOT."I'm George Washington," said Kenniboy. "I'm Napoleon Boneyparte," said Russell. "I'm ME," said Francis. TOMMY DREAMS AFTER EATING THANKSGIVING HASTY PUDDING. His grasp it constantly eludes, this pudding sweet and pasty, For as you know, as puddings go, this kind is very hasty. |
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