You have now, reader, followed me through my military enterprises, up to the time of my being appointed lieutenant in the 76th regiment. The time has arrived when I have to request that you will beat the silvery wave with me; for I am bound to my native country with my regiment, after an absence of ten years. On arriving at Calcutta, our reception was gratifying in the extreme. Every house opened its hospitable doors, and the tables groaned under a profusion of good cheer. Every one was anxious to hear the tale of war; and, wherever I went, I was thought ill-natured if I refused to repeat storm after storm, and all my battles over and over again. But, the ship being about to weigh anchor, our stay here was but short. We embarked at Balloh Ghaut, on board small sloops, and in three days reached the vessel, the Lord Duncan, Captain Bradford, in safety. We had on board a great number of passengers, and about two hundred invalids, under the command of Captain Lindsay, of my old corps. Two days afterwards we bade adieu to the Indian shores, leaving many dear and respected friends behind us.

We were at this time at war with France, and the Indian Seas were well watched by cruisers from off the Isle of France. Our fleet consisted of thirteen Indiamen of the first-rate convoyed by the Tremendous, seventy-four, and Hindostan, seventy-four. We sailed in two lines, headed by the two seventy-fours. All seemed order and discipline, and we thought ourselves a match for any ships of France we might have fallen in with. Everything went on smoothly, practising and drilling our guns once a week, and keeping a constant look-out for the enemy. Off the coast of Madagascar a ship was discovered, early in the morning, standing right down upon us. Seeing her a single vessel, we conceived her to be one of our cruisers from off the Cape of Good Hope; but, when she was within one mile and a half from us, she could not answer our signals, and consequently ran towards the land, which was to windward of us. The Tremendous, being a fast sailer, went in chase of her. The Frenchman soon found that he was mistaken. He, no doubt, at first took us for a French fleet that was then out in these seas, and relied upon his fast and superior sailing to enable him to get away, should he prove mistaken; but our commodore overhauled him hand over hand. The Frenchman tacked, turned, and twisted, but he found it was of no use. He therefore resorted to his natural cunning, shortened sail, and at last backed maintopsail, and waited till the English vessel came within pistol-shot. The commodore, conceiving that the Frenchman was about to strike, did not wish to injure her, and therefore would not fire. The French captain availed himself of this interval, and gave the Tremendous a whole broadside, by which she was so disabled as to become an immoveable log on the water. The Frenchman up-helm, and off he started. The commodore, at last, got his ship's broadside to bear, and nearly tore her out of the water. However, she was a faster sailer than any ship in our fleet, and, finally, made her escape, to the mortification of the whole fleet, except one Captain BrusÉe, a French prisoner of war, a passenger on board our ship, who danced with ineffable delight;—natural enough, but not very pleasant to the sight of an Englishman.

The following day we experienced a most violent hurricane, which lasted for two days without cessation. Fortunately, our fleet suffered but little injury, with the exception of one vessel, the Lady Castlereagh, which we thought must inevitably have been lost. She was about a quarter of a mile from us, and we could at one time see her whole keel. There was a general shriek of terror from all on board of us, and our captain said that he feared she would never right. The next gigantic wave, however, brought her up, and she did right, in spite of our predictions, but seemed to roll, pitch, and labour dreadfully. Some parts of her masts were carried away; but what, I do not now recollect. Three of our ships separated from the fleet, and we imagined that they had fallen into the hands of the French, for we learned, at St. Helena, that they had been seen a few days before from that island. The name of the French ship which we had fallen in with was Le Cannonier, a sixty-four, from the Isle of France. We understood that she was so badly wounded, that she was obliged to put into Simon's Bay, not aware, at that time, that the Cape was again in possession of the English. She soon found this out, cut and ran, and got clear to the Isle of France. Our three strayed ships made their appearance at St. Helena the following day, having seen the French fleet the night after the affair between the Tremendous and Le Cannonier, and, under cover of the night, escaped unobserved, or they must have been taken, as the French fleet consisted of five sail or more.

Our reception at St. Helena, by Governor Brooke, was truly splendid and hospitable. We remained there, I think, eight or ten days, after which we again stood towards Old England.

We arrived in England some time in October, 1807. We landed at Long Reach, and proceeded to Dartford, in Kent, from whence I marched my invalids, or rather had them carried, to Chelsea Hospital—a journey which I was three days in accomplishing. On the fourth day I reached the place of destination; and, having made my report to the commandant of Chelsea, I returned to join the regiment at Dartford. Here we remained for about a week or ten days, receiving the greatest kindness from the gentlemen in that town and its vicinity. From thence the regiment was ordered to Nottingham, and I obtained leave of absence to proceed home.

My primary object in coming to England was the hope of seeing my father; and I anxiously availed myself of the opportunity which now offered of revisiting my native village, full of anticipation of the pleasure with which I should relate my adventures to all who had formerly known me. The coach which was to convey me to the village of my birth, had not proceeded many miles, when a coincidence happened, which, though "true as holy writ," might be thought, without this assurance, to bear the marks of fiction. On the coach, next to me, sat a pilot from Aldborough, in Suffolk, who, suddenly addressing himself to me, said, "I really cannot help thinking, Sir, from your extraordinary resemblance to a person I once knew, that you are his son." The words, "once knew," turned my blood cold, and it was some minutes before I could muster courage to ask the name of the person to whom he referred. What was my astonishment when he at once replied, "Shipp!" "Is he then dead, Sir?" exclaimed I, convinced now that it was my father of whom he spoke. "I regret to say he is," replied the pilot; and he added, while his lip quivered, and the tear of sympathy stood in his eye, "You are his son John—I feel sure that I cannot be mistaken now." At this moment the coach stopped to change horses, and I jumped off, and, instead of supping with the rest of the passengers, took a solitary stroll, to hide my grief. I had left India at a great sacrifice to my prospects. There were all my friends, and there lay all my interest. I might have made a very advantageous exchange, and remained in that country; but I could not resist the temptation of coming to England, from anticipations of the delight I should enjoy in recounting my life to a parent who had almost from my infancy been estranged from me. I had now heard, in the sudden and unexpected manner I have related, of that parent's death! But, not to dwell long on this painful subject, I made up my mind, that, notwithstanding what I had just learnt, I would still proceed to Saxmundham. On arriving there, I found living my father's two brothers, and my mother's sister. With the latter I took up my quarters, and spent a most happy fortnight under her roof. To enumerate the alterations which had been made, both in places and persons, since I left my native village, or to detail the inquiries I had to answer, and the congratulations which poured in upon me from all quarters, would be as uninteresting to the reader as it would be tedious to myself.

I soon returned to Nottingham, and rejoined my regiment. From thence I was ordered to Wakefield, in Yorkshire, on the recruiting service. Here nothing but gaiety prevailed; and, as I was the only officer at the place for a considerable time, I received invitation upon invitation, to dinners, balls, and suppers; and, to confess the truth, I thought myself no small personage, which, as I was now in the grenadier company, was not, in its literal sense, very easily to be controverted.

While I was at this place, I was called upon to perform the office of second, in an affair of honour between a military officer of rather diminutive person, and a huge fellow of a civilian. The circumstances which gave rise to the quarrel were as follow:—

Among the fair attendants of a ball which was given one evening in the town, was a very pretty girl, on whose charms the tall gentleman had for some time looked with amorous inclination, and whom, it is to be presumed, he therefore wished to exclude from the attentions of all but himself. The young lady herself, however, was not so exclusive in her notions; and, accordingly, finding her conversation courted, and the favour of her hand solicited, by a dashing little officer in handsome uniform, and who, though a warrior of somewhat small dimensions, was really a dapper, good-looking little fellow, she made no scruple either of listening to his flattering tongue, or of accepting his hand for the dance. This preference of the man of steel so irritated his huge rival, that he determined to pass some insult upon him. He accordingly found a more compassionate lady as his partner; and, no sooner had the dance commenced, than he took the first opportunity which presented itself of treading, with all his weight, on the little officer's toes. In dancing down a second time, he played him the same trick. Our little hero did not think it much of a joke to have the full weight of a gentleman full six-feet-three in height, and stout in proportion, twice on his toes within a few minutes; but as his tormentor made the most ample apologies on both occasions, he felt fully disposed to endure the pain with as much fortitude as possible, and to attribute the occurrence to accident; when his little rustic beauty, who had more carefully watched and better understood the manoeuvres of the neglected swain, whispered in his ear, "A pointed insult, Sir." These words roused the blood of the son of Mars in a moment; he watched the movements of his toe-treading foe, and, just as he was coming down the middle a third time, to repeat the trick, he jumped upon a chair, and from thence sprung on his enemy's back, and, seizing his nose, he wrung it in so unmerciful a manner, as to compel its proprietor to cry out most piteously for help. The parties were at length separated by the master of the ceremonies, and a challenge was of course the result; the gentleman whose nose had been thus scurvily treated, in the presence of almost the whole town, being compelled either to fight or to quit society.

Mortal combat having been appointed to take place the next morning, it was arranged by the seconds that the principals were to be placed back to back, and that from thence each party was to step six paces, and then to fire together by signal.

Preliminaries being thus concerted, and the fatal morning having arrived, the parties met punctually at the appointed spot, and were duly ranged with their backs to each other. At this moment the contrast between the courage of the two gentlemen was to the full as apparent as the ludicrous disproportion in their size. When I was placing them on the line drawn by me for their march, my little man, who possessed true "pluck," and was as cool as a cucumber, observing the trepidation of his opponent, whispered to me, just loud enough to be overheard, "Where shall I hit him, Shipp? Shall I wing him?" On hearing this, the knees of the six-foot Yorkshireman, which were already on the trot, broke into a full gallop; and, when his second placed the pistol, duly primed and loaded, into his hand, he seized it by the muzzle. This mistake, as I always loved fair play, I rectified; and, at last, the word "March" was given. Away went long-legs, getting over at least three yards of ground at each stride; and, had we permitted him to proceed at this rate, the one might as well have fired from the top of St. Paul's, and the other from Table Mountain; so the seconds saved him the trouble of extending his walk any further, by measuring twelve paces; and the signal having been given to fire, the little one's ball cut through the collar of his affrighted opponent's coat, and the big one's nearly shot his own toes off. At this crisis of the affair, the gigantic rustic was scarcely so tall as his little rival, and his knees and body were so inclined to take a more firm position, that we expected every moment he would fall flat on the earth; when his second roused him by saying, "Come, Sir, we must have another shot." This brought him fully to his senses, and he exclaimed, throwing down his pistol, "I'll see you d——d first; he has put it through my coat already, and the next time I may get it where the tailor cannot mend it. No, no; I am perfectly satisfied; so I wish you a good morning." And off he trudged, at a pretty round pace, to the great amusement of the other three, as well as of some country bumpkins, who were grinning from behind an adjoining hedge, and who roared out, "Well done, little un; bravo, little robin-redbreast." By the result of this affair, the six-feet-three gentleman lost his honour as well as his dearie, and the subject was the theme of many a song in Wakefield for years after.

The routine of dissipation which was kept up at Wakefield, was not to be sustained by me without expense; and to meet these expenses I spent more than my income. This extravagance—with the loss of fifty pounds, of which I was robbed by my servant, and the assistance of a designing sergeant, who took advantage of my youth and inexperience—soon involved me in debts, to liquidate which I was obliged to apply for permission to sell my commission. This, in consideration of my services, was readily granted; and, having effected a sale, I paid every shilling of my debts, and with the residue of the money repaired to London, where, in about six months, I found myself without a shilling, without a home, and without a friend. Thus circumstanced, my fondness of the profession induced me to turn my thoughts to the army again. I could see no earthly difficulty why I should not rise in the same way I had before; and accordingly I enlisted at Westminster, in his majesty's 24th Dragoons,[11] and in two or three days after went with the recruiting-sergeant to the cavalry depÔt at Maidstone, then under the command of Major-General George Hay. I had not been there long before an officer, who had served with me in campaigns in India, arrived at the depÔt, and, immediately recognizing me, my history was made known to the commanding officer, and I was promoted to the rank of sergeant. I remained at the depÔt about three months, at the expiration of which we were ordered to India, and I embarked as acting quarter-master on board the New Warren Hastings, Captain Larkins, and sailed from Spithead on the 8th day of January, 1808.

We experienced a most terrific gale in the British Channel, and were at last obliged to run for Torbay, where we brought up near where the East Indiaman, the Abergavenny, was lost. Near us lay a ship of war, from which, at the imminent hazard of the lives of an officer and six men, a boat was sent off to our ship, the crew of which, after riding in safety over the mountainous waves, desired us, in a most authoritative tone, to throw out a rope. All hands were at the leeward side in a moment, when there was a general whispering amongst the tars. "Shiver my timbers," said one, "but that looks like a press."—"Start me," said another, "but so it does." Thus went round the general buzz, when the man of authority, in size not much larger than a quaker,[12] with a sword as long as himself, and a huge cocked-hat, as big as a gaff top-sail, which he skulled off with as much grace and majesty as a grand bashaw, flew up the side of the ship in an instant. He saluted the quarter-deck, as is usual, then mounted on tiptoe, and danced up to the captain, who was on deck, and, with the authority of an admiral of the red, demanded to see the ship's books. At this sound every sailor writhed his features and limbs into the most ludicrous distortions; some limped, others stooped, and all did their utmost to appear as decrepit and unfit for service as possible. As our ship was then in imminent danger of going ashore, the captain remonstrated, setting forth the perilous situation of his ship, the number of lives, and the amount of property on board; but notwithstanding that we were at that moment dragging our two anchors, the little officer persisted in obeying the orders of his commander, and walked off with six of our very best seamen. By the loss of these men, our ship was involved in double the danger she was in before, as they were our ablest hands. Whether or not this was a justifiable act, I am unacquainted; but its enforcement at such a conjuncture seems sadly at variance with the principles of humanity. Fortunately for us, however, the storm soon abated, and the following morning, ere the feathered tribe were on the wing, we again stood on our way towards our destined port. Our ship had suffered but little injury, and she now scudded sweetly along the blue waters, her white sails swollen with majestic pride, and the eye of every one on board lingering, until it was lost in the distance, on that dear isle from which we were so rapidly departing. After this, we had a long and tedious voyage, in which much misery was experienced by all the troops on board, in consequence of the cruel and despotic conduct of our commanding officer. This gentleman is now no more; and, if it were on this account only, I should refrain from mentioning his name. For this, and other reasons, I shall withhold from the reader all detail of conduct which I have myself long tried to forget; and content myself by stating, in justification of the epithets applied by me to such conduct, that the cat-o'-nine-tails was constantly at work; so much so, that Captain Larkins at length interfered, and protested "that he would not have his quarter-deck converted into a slaughterhouse, nor the eyes of the ladies on board disgusted with the sight of the naked back of a poor screaming soldier, every time they came upon deck."

The distant low-land peeping from afar, and the company of little messengers from the myrtle grove, at length apprised us that we were in sight of the long-looked-for haven. The wind was contrary, and night had begun to throw over the silvery deep her sombre mantle; so that we were obliged to stand out to sea, to avoid getting into the currents that prevail near this land. Early in the morning it was dark and hazy, but at about ten o'clock it cleared up: the sun shed his bright beams over the Indian Ocean; the little harbinger of peace was again on the wing; and we again beheld the land.

All the passengers were now promenading the quarter-deck: some viewing the beauty of the scenery; others whispering sad notes of farewell love; and all anxiously looking forward to the moment of disembarkation.

We were crowding all possible sail to get the ship safe into the river by night. The wind was fair, and the sky was spotless, save here and there some little white clouds, that seemed to dance about us. In an instant after, the ship was thrown on her beam-ends, her gunwales under water, and passengers tumbling and rolling over each other. The crew had to struggle hard to keep her head above water. Every eye was wildly fixed on the captain, and every cheek wore a death-like paleness. At last, away went her fore-top mast, top-gallant and royal-mast, foreyard, main-royal-mast, main-top-gallant, and main-top-mast; and her mizen-mast was much injured. In that short moment the cup of bliss was dashed from our lips, and we lay a complete wreck upon the water; but, the masts having gone, carrying everything before them, and the ship having righted, every hand was as instantaneously set to work, and busily employed in remedying the evils and clearing the wreck. It was imagined at first that the ship had gone ashore; but, on trying her pumps, it appeared that she had made no water. We soon discovered that our misfortune was occasioned by what are termed, in those seas, white squalls. These come on without any previous indication; and, though of short duration, are so destructive while they last, that no ship under heavy sail can stand against them. These squalls are most frequent when the sky is clearest. They are supposed to be contained in those little white flying clouds, which, previous to the storm, are seen hovering over the ship, as though watching to catch the mariners off their guard.

We were again obliged to stand out to sea; but we soon cleared away, and once more stood towards land. The day was rainy and hazy, when through the darksome mist we beheld a sail, and soon discovered, to our great joy, that it was the boat of a Calcutta pilot, who immediately came on board our vessel. On examining the masts, we discovered that the maintop-mast would not bear her sails; therefore splinters and stays were immediately put on. The day brightened up, but the wind blew strong; so, not being able to discover landmarks, we cast anchor for the night. The next morning we found that we were so close to land that we could see men walking on the sea-beach, and distinguish huts and towns in the distance. We weighed anchor early, and stood towards Saugar, the wind blowing a smart gale. At one time we approached so near the breakers that we expected to go ashore, and a few minutes after we shipped a tremendous sea, the major part of which went over the poop and through the great cabin windows, carrying trunks, boxes, beds, and everything before it. I was on deck at the time: the ship's stern seemed to be fastened, and she shook much; but at last on she went. I have no hesitation in saying that her stern struck the ground, but no injury was done beyond sousing a few trunks and beds. We at last reached Saugar in safety; but before we arrived there our feelings were excited to a high pitch of sympathy by an interesting scene. Captain Larkins was standing on the poop, close by where I stood, with his glass at his eye examining the ships which were lying at anchor, when he suddenly exclaimed, "I surely know that ship lying yonder: my eyes cannot deceive me—it's my old ship, the Warren Hastings." The pilot was requested to go within hail of her. All hands were upon deck; every eye fixed upon the strange ship; and sailors and soldiers manned the rigging. The captain got the large speaking-trumpet, and bellowed out, "What ship, a-hoy?" Answer, "The Warren Hastings—what ship are you?" Answer, "The New Warren Hastings." Here the shouting of the crews of both ships was quite deafening. Our captain could not say a syllable more, but was so much affected as to shed a tear to the memory of his old ship, which he had manfully defended, but lost to some French ship-of-war. She had been retaken by some of our cruisers.

A short time after this we came to anchor a little above Saugar; and the following day we were shipped on board sloops, and sailed up the river Hoogley, and in about a week came to anchor off Fort William, Calcutta, and were again placed on terra firma. We remained in the fort about a fortnight; and, while boats were in preparation for our conveyance up the river Ganges, to our respective regiments, all was gaiety and mirth.

The monsoon, or rainy season, having commenced, we sailed from Calcutta, under the command of Colonel Wade, on route to Cawnpore, where we arrived in safety in about three months, with the loss of seven or eight men drowned, and of a few others, who died from having eaten too freely of unripe fruit.