Odd24_Practice.jpg (74K) “WELL, this is a morning!” emphatically exclaimed a stripling, with a mouth and eyes formed by Nature of that peculiar width and power of distension, so admirably calculated for the expression of stupid wonder or surprise; while his companion, elevating his nasal organ and projecting his chin, sniffed the fresh morning breeze, as they trudged through the dewy meadows, and declared that it was exactly for all the world similar-like to reading Thomson's Seasons! In which apt and appropriate simile the other concurred. “Tom's a good fellow to lend us his gun,” continued he—“I only hope it ain't given to tricking, that's all. I say, Sugarlips, keep your powder dry.” “Leave me alone for that,” replied Sugarlips; “I know a thing or two, although this is the first time that ever I have been out. What a scuffling the birds do make”—added he, peeping into the cage which they had, as a precautionary measure, stocked with sparrows, in order that they might not be disappointed in their sport—“How they long to be on the wing!” “I'll wing 'em, presently!” cried his comrade, with a vaunting air— “and look if here ain't the very identical spot for a display of my skill. Pick out one of the best and biggest, and tie up a-top of yonder stile, and you shall soon have a specimen of my execution.” Sugarlips quickly did his bidding. “Now—come forward and stand back! What do ye think o' that, ey?” said the sportsman—levelling his gun, throwing back his head, closing his sinister ocular, and stretching out his legs after the manner of the Colossus of Rhodes—“Don't you admire my style?” “Excellent!” said Sugarlips—“But I think I could hit it.” “What?” “Why, the stile to be sure.” “Keep quiet, can't you—Now for it—” and, trembling with eagerness, his hand pulled the trigger, but no report followed. “The deuce is in the gun,” cried he, lowering it, and examining the lock; “What can ail it?” “Why, I'll be shot if that ain't prime,” exclaimed Sugarlips, laughing outright. “What do you mean?” “I've only forgot the priming—that's all.” “There's a pretty fellow, you are, for a sportsman.” “Well, it's no matter as it happens; for, though 'Time and tide wait for no man,' a sparrow tied must, you know. There! that will do.” “Sure you put the shot in now?” “If you put the shot into Dicky as surely, he'll never peck groundsel again, depend on it.” Again the “murderous tube” was levelled; Sugarlips backed against an adjoining wall, with a nervous adhesiveness that evidently proved him less fearful of a little mortar than a great gun! “That's right; out of the way, Sugarlips; I am sure I shall hit him this time.” And no sooner had he uttered this self-congratulatory assurance (alas! not life-assurance!) than a report (most injurious to the innocent cock-sparrow) was heard in the neighbourhood! “Murder!—mur-der!” roared a stentorian voice, which made the criniferous coverings of their craniums stand on end “Like quills upon the fretful porcupine.” In an instant the sportsman let fall his gun, and Sugarlips ran affrighted towards the stile. He found it really “vox et preterea nihil;” for a few feathers of the bird alone were visible: he had been blown to nothing; and, peeping cautiously round the angle of the wall, he beheld a portly gentleman in black running along with the unwieldy gait of a chased elephant. “Old Flank'em, of the Finishing Academy, by jingo!” exclaimed Sugarlips. “It's a mercy we didn't finish him! Why, he must actually have been on the point of turning the corner. I think we had better be off; for, if the old dominie catches us, he will certainly liberate our sparrows, and—put us in the cage!” But, where's the spoil?” “Spoil, indeed!” cried Sugarlips; “you've spoiled him nicely. I've an idea, Tom, you were too near, as the spendthrift nephew said of his miserly uncle. If you can't get an aim at a greater distance, you'd never get a name as a long shot—that's my mind.” |