Transcriber’s Note:

All captions for illustrations were created by the transcriber.

An Ox was seized by the Dogs, and brought to trial, for having gored his Driver in such a brutal manner, in Smithfield Market, as caused his death. His trial was held at Quadruped Court, Beast Park, near the Pedestrian Hotel. The Lion sat as Judge. The Dogs offered themselves as witnesses, which the Judge refused, as they were thief-takers, and interested. Here the council too began to ’arangue, which the Judge would not admit of; he told them, indeed, if a point of law should arise, they might speak to it, but he would have no witness brow-beaten or misled in that court.

The Horse and Ass were then called up; who deposed, that they saw the Ox go to a Man and gore him, near Smithfield, and that his life was despaired of.

To this the Ox pleaded ignorance, and said, that he had been ill-used and deprived of his senses, and knew not what happened in consequence thereof; but, provided that were not the case, he certainly would have lost his life by the murdering Butcher, who deals death and destruction to our race, to procure subsistence for himself and family, by the sale of our carcases. So now, my Lord, I stand here, arraigned for the accidental offence of goring an inhuman drover, whose only business it was to dispose of me to the keeper of the slaughter house.

A Bee, that had been perched on the Oxes head, offered his evidence,——and deposed, that he had been an eye witness of the whole affair.

“This poor Ox, my Lord,” says he, “was taken from his friends and relations in the country, where he led a peaceful innocent life, and put under the care of a cruel and inhuman drover, who pricked him all the way to London, with a nail at the end of a pole; and when he was lame, and unable to walk so fast as the savage driver designed, he beat him about the legs, with a stick, with a great knob at the end of it, which still made him more lame. When he came to Smithfield, he stood, with his head tied on the rails, from 4 o’clock on Monday morning, till 8 on Monday night, which was sixteen hours, when the anguish he was in affected his head so much, that he lost his senses, and committed the act for which he stands indicted. Who is to blame, my Lord? It is true, the Man lost his life, but the innocent Ox is not to suffer for it: because from ill treatment the Ox had lost his senses, and therefore could not be accountable for his actions. Those are to blame, my Lord, who encourage drivers in such acts of inhumanity; and suffer a market for wild and mad beasts, to be held in the middle of a large and opulent city: do you think the queen of my hive would suffer us to bring home what we make boot upon? No, in order to prevent mischief and confusion, we prepare our meat before we are let into the city, and so would these people, had they half the sense they pretend to have!”

Then the Judge interrogated several other witnesses, who corroborated the fact of the former, and the Bear, as counsel, cross-examined them, in a mild and friendly manner, so as not to confuse their evidence.

Then the Tiger arose, and having commanded silence, spoke as follows:

You hear what a distinct and clear evidence the Bee has given, in behalf of the prisoner, and you seem sensible of the truth of it. ’Tis amazing that mankind should complain of cruelty in animals, when their own minds are productive of such scenes of inhumanity: Are not the Ox and other creatures murdered for their emolument? Are not we hunted to death for their amusement, as well as the Stag and the Hare? Are not the Bees burnt, and their houses plundered for their use? What have you Mr. Horse, for carrying the boobies on your back, but stripes and ill treatment? And what have you, Mr. Ass, who are their nurse and doctor, but lashes and ill language? Man, the two legged Tiger man, is the most ungrateful of beasts.”

Then the Judge recapitulated the evidence, which appeared too clear to admit of a doubt, that the poor Ox was pricked and beaten in a most inhuman manner, by the drover, and that being driven to desperation by the cruel treatment, he turned suddenly round, and gored the hardhearted drover. Upon which, the Jury returned a Verdict of Manslaughter, and the Judge Fined him a Blade of Grass, ordered him to be Imprisoned an Hour, and then Discharged him, amid general acclamations.

Upon which, the Cock clapped his wings, and crowed applause to the verdict; and the spectators departed, perfectly satisfied with the sentence.

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• Transcriber’s Notes:
  • Missing or obscured punctuation and words were corrected.
  • Some typographical errors were silently corrected.
  • Corrected “arrangue” to “’arangue” as an “h” was dropped.