  I studied my arithmetic, And then I went to bed, And on my little pillow white Laid down my little head. I hoped for dreams of dear delight, Of sugar-candy bliss; But oh! my sleep, the livelong night, Was filled with things like this. math Add forty jars of damson jam To fifty loaves of cake, Subtract a cow, and tell me how Then add the butter to the jam, And give it to a boy, How long will ’t take ere grievous ache Shall dash his childish joy? If twenty men stole thirty sheep And sold them to the Pope, What would they get if he should let Them have the price in soap? And if he slew each guileless beast, And in pontific glee Sold leg and loin for Roman coin, What would his earnings be? nervous boy Next, if a Tiger climbed a tree To get a cocoanut, And if by hap the feline chap Should find the shop was shut; And if ten crabs with clawing dabs Should pinch his Bengal toes, What would remain when he should gain The ground, do you suppose? tiger climbing a tree that has a "closed" sign on it Divide a stick of licorice By twenty infant jaws, How long must each lose power of speech And if these things are asked of you, While you’re a-chewing of it, What sum of birch, rod, pole or perch Will be your smarting profit? I woke upon my little bed In anguish and in pain. I’d sooner lose my brand-new shoes Than dream those dreams again. Oh! girls and boys, who crave the joys Of slumber calm and deep, Away then kick your ’rithmetic Before you go to sleep! |
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