April, 1843.

My dear Friend,

You will congratulate us on our having quitted “the haunted house;” and you will do so heartily when I tell you that six families have succeeded each other in it, in as many weeks, since our departure. The sixth family was about to quit immediately when we heard this news; five having been driven out by most obstinate persecutions, not only during the nights, but in broad daylight, of so violent a description, that the windows were all broken in a large upper chamber, our favourite room. The sixth family suffered similar annoyances, and also complained that much of their china was demolished. Like ourselves, no one has been able to obtain quiet rest in that house, or rather I should say, others have been in a worse state than ourselves, for we obtained some relief in consequence of our doorkeeper’s achievement. And now I hope I have done with this subject. I have said much upon it, but I must be held excusable, as “’tis passing strange.”

Our present house is extremely commodious, and much taste and judgment have been displayed in its construction. The terrace is extensive and very picturesque, and the upper rooms are well situated. Most of the rooms are furnished with glass windows, and the house altogether, being exceedingly well built, is adapted for affording warmth in the winter, and proving a cool summer residence.

With regard to a sojourn in Egypt, it is not an easy matter to give you the pour et contre. Of one thing I am convinced, that persons must remain a year in this country, that is, they must go the round of the seasons, or nearly so, before they can fully judge of the comforts it offers. I well remember the extreme annoyance I experienced, for some months after our arrival, from the unusually prolonged heat, of which I complained to you, and from the flies and musquitoes, which were really and constantly distressing; and I could scarcely believe what people told me, namely, that I should soon find myself very well contented with the climate of the country. As to the musquitoes, they interfere so much with enjoyment, that a traveller who visits Egypt during the great heat may assert, with truth, that he has no comfort by day, nor by night until he enters his curtain. I confess that I often feared we could not remain here as long as I wished. No sooner, however, did the Nile subside, than my hopes revived; and finding that the most charming temperature imaginable succeeded the heat, I began to understand what travellers mean when they call this a delicious climate. November is a sweet month here—December and January are rather too cold, taking into consideration that there are neither fire-places nor chimneys in any of the houses, excepting in the kitchens. February and March are perfectly delightful, the temperature then being almost as mild as summer in England. During April there occur some instances of hot wind, otherwise it is an agreeable month. In May the hot winds are trying, and then follow four months of oppressive heat.

Devoted as I am, justly, to my own dear country and her blessed associations, I can give you my candid opinion, without any fear that I shall be suspected of preferring a residence in the Levant to my English home, and will show you, without reserve, in what consist the fascinations of this part of the East;—in the climate, in the manners of the people, and in the simplicity of their habits, which not only attract my admiration, but render me much less affected by their general poverty than I am by less distress in my own country. It is very certain that if a daily journal were published in Cairo, we should not see paragraphs headed “death by starvation,” “distressing case,” &c.; but why is it? for there are no houses here for the reception of the poor, as in England. It results from the contented spirit of the poor, if provided simply with bread and water; and, more than all, from the sort of family union which subsists throughout the East, and which literally teaches the poor to “bear each other’s burthens.” In visiting the middle and higher classes of society, the same family compact is observable, and the mother of the family continues always the mother and the head; her gentle reign lasting with her valued life, and the love and respect of those around her increasing with her years. It is asserted, that when Mohammed was asked what relation had the strongest claim on affection and respect, he replied with warmth, “The mother! the mother! the mother!”

All blood relations in the East take precedence of the wife, who is received into a family as a younger sister. It could scarcely be suffered here, or in Turkey, that a father or mother should quit a house to make way for a son’s wife. This you will remember is remarked in Mr. Urquhart’s “Spirit of the East;” and let me ask you, is not this as it should be? I cannot understand how any person with a spark of nature in his breast could allow a beloved parent to resign what a child should be willing to shed his heart’s blood to preserve.

In obtaining an insight into the habits and manners of the women, I possess considerable advantages; first, from my brother’s knowledge of the East, and secondly, from my plan of adhering strictly to habits cherished by the people, which system has secured at once their respect, while it has excited their surprise. We have even gone so far as to adopt their manner of eating; and here I must digress to beg you not to say “How very disgusting!” but read how we do it, and then you may confess that it is not so unpleasant as you thought. The dishes are prepared in a very delicate manner; for instance, small cucumbers and other vegetables of a similar kind are scooped out and stuffed with minced meat and rice; minced meat is wrapped in vine-leaves, and so dexterously cooked, that each leaf with its contents continues compact, and is easily taken in the fingers. Fried meat in cakes, and the same in form of sausages, are equally convenient; and all I have mentioned, and a hundred others (for there is a great variety in their cookery), may be taken almost as delicately as a slice of cake. For soups, rice prepared in the Eastern manner, and stews, we use spoons; and so do the Turks. One difficulty occasionally presents itself; but not at home. The chief lady of a house, to do her guests honour, presents them with morsels of her own selection, with her own fingers; and in some cases repeats this compliment frequently. It would be a positive affront to refuse these; and I am quite sure that no Englishwoman can so far strain her politeness as to eat as much as her hostess, in her excessive hospitality, desires, though the latter sets her a wonderful example. I have really seen the ladies of this country eat as much as should suffice for three or four moderate meals at one sitting. But to return to my difficulty. I always found it to be the best plan to receive readily, for a time, the morsels which were offered; and when satisfied, to accept perhaps another, and sometimes two or three; at the same time assuring my entertainer, that they were redundant, but that her viands were so extremely well chosen, that I must, after the repast, inquire who has superintended the cuisine, and derive from her some information. Thus I removed the impression which was immediately formed, that the dinner was not dressed agreeably with my taste: and induced only the remark, that “the English eat so much less than the Easterns;” accompanied by regret that so little satisfied me, but followed by an expression of pleasure that the dinner was so agreeable to me.

I have not found the system of Eastern etiquette difficult of adoption; and from the honourable manner in which I have been received, and treated, and always pressed to repeat my visit, I may draw the conclusion fairly, that I have understood how to please the people. It has been a favourite opinion of mine, and one in which I have been educated, that a little quiet observation of the manners and habits of others will always prevent those differences about trifles which so often disturb society, and sometimes separate even friends. Here I have indeed found the advantage of exercising this observation, and it has proved the means of securing to me invariably polite attention and respect.

I think you would be amused could you see our dinner-arrangements at home. First, a small carpet is spread on the mat; then, a stool cased with mother-of-pearl, &c. is placed upon it, and serves as the support of a round tray of tinned copper, on which is arranged our dinner, with a cake of bread for each person. A maid then brings a copper ewer and basin, and pours water on the hands of each of our party, and we arrange ourselves round the tray, our Eastern table-napkins spread on our knees. These are larger and longer than English hand-towels, that they may cover both knees when sitting in the Turkish manner. During the meal, the maid holds a water-bottle, or defends us from flies with a fly-whisk. Having no change of plates, knives, or forks, no time is lost at dinner; and it usually occupies twenty minutes. Thus, much valuable time is saved by avoiding works of supererogation. One or two sweet dishes are placed on the tray with those which are savoury; and it is singular to see the women of this country take morsels of sweet and savoury food almost alternately. Immediately after dinner, the ewer and basin are brought round, the stool and carpet are removed with the tray, and the stool is always placed in another room until again required. There is something very sociable in this mode of sitting at table, and it is surprising to see how many persons can sit with comfort round a comparatively small tray. I should advise you and other friends in England to resume the use of small round tables: I have often regretted they are no longer in fashion: for a small family, they are infinitely more comfortable than the large square or oblong tables used in England.

It is true, as you suppose, that I am sometimes amused at my position, and more particularly so, when, on the occasion of any thing heavy being brought into the hareem, one of the men passes through the passage belonging to it. Their approach is always announced by their saying audibly “O Protector! (Ya SÁtir) and “Permission!” (Destoor), several times. Excepting on such occasions, no man approaches the hareem but the sakka, or water-carrier; and I often think that any person with a knowledge of Arabic, and none of the habits of the people, would think these sakkas devotees, judging by their constant religious ejaculations. The men are quite as careful in avoiding the hareem, as the ladies are in concealing their faces, and indeed, in many cases, more so. I have been amused particularly by the care of one of our men, who, having lived many years in a Turkish family, is quite a Turkish servant. On one occasion, on returning home from riding with my boys, my donkey fairly threw me off as he entered the court; and when this man raised me up (for my head was on the ground), I supported myself for a moment with my hands against the wall of the house, while I assured my poor children, who were exceedingly frightened, that I was not hurt, forgetting that I was showing my hands not only to our own men, but to the men who attended the donkeys! I was immediately recalled to a consciousness of where I was, and of the impropriety of such an exposure, by the servant I have mentioned, who most respectfully covered my hands with my habarah, and wrapped it around me so scrupulously that the men had not a second time the advantage of seeing a finger.

No person can imagine the strictness of the hareem without adopting its seclusion, nor can a stranger form a just estimate of the degree of liberty enjoyed by the women without mixing in Eastern society. One thing is certain, that if a husband be a tyrant, his wife is his slave; but such cases are extremely rare. I do not pretend to defend the system of marrying blindfold, as it were; nor do I look for those happy marriages which are most frequently found in England; but I am pleased to find the Eastern women contented, and, without a single exception among my acquaintances, so cheerful, that I naturally conclude they are treated with consideration. The middle classes are at liberty to pay visits, and to go to the bath, when they please; but their fathers and husbands object to their shopping; therefore female brokers are in the frequent habit of attending the hareems. The higher orders are more closely guarded, yet as this very circumstance is a mark of distinction, the women congratulate each other on this subject; and it is not uncommon for a husband to give his wife a pet name, expressive of her hidden charms, such as “the concealed jewel.”

There lives opposite to us a good old woman, a devotee, who is a sort of Deborah to the quarter, and who passes judgment from her projecting window on all cases which are proposed for her opinion, much to our edification. One occurred a few days since, which will show you that the system I have described is not confined to any particular grade in society. A young man in the neighbourhood had been betrothed to a very young girl, upon the recommendation of his fellow-servant, without sending any of his own female relations to ascertain if her appearance was agreeable, or the reverse. Becoming anxious on this subject, two days after the betrothal, he sent a female friend, who asserted that his bride had but one eye, that she was pitiable in appearance, and unfit to become his wife. The person who had recommended her was a married man, and the bridegroom accused him of culpable negligence, in not having ascertained whether she had two eyes or not, as he might have sent his wife to pay her a visit; while, on his own part, he had taken no such precaution, and, being the most interested, was certainly the most to blame. Such was the state of the case when referred to Deborah. After hearing it patiently, she said to the young man, “My son, why did you consent to be betrothed to a girl who was not known to your mother and to the women of your house?” “They have been, since my betrothal, to see her,” he answered, in a very melancholy tone of voice, “but she sat in a dark room, and they could not tell whether she had two eyes or not; and, in truth, O my mother, I have bought her many articles of dress, and I have paid four hundred piastres as her dowry, the savings of many months.” “Has she learnt any trade?” asked the old woman, “that so much was required as her dowry?” “No,” replied the bridegroom; “but she is of a higher family than mine, possessing houses, and lands, and property.” “Property belongs to God,” replied she; and so saying, she retired from the conference. We have since heard that, although the family of the girl is too respectable to permit that her betrothed husband should see her face even in her mother’s presence, he has put the houses, and lands, and property in the scale, and found her defect too light to be worthy of consideration.