A discourse on light—Quangrollart explains the word crashee—Believes a fowl is a fruit—Gives a further account of Youwarkeds reception by her father, and by the king—Tommy and Hallycarnie provided for at court—Youwarkee and her father visit the colambs, and are visited—Her return put off till next winter, when her father is to come with her.
THE next day I prepared again of the best of everything for my new guests. I killed three fowls, and ordered Pedro (who was as good a cook almost as myself) to get them ready for boiling, whilst we took a walk to the lake. Though we went out in the clearest part of the morning, I heard no complaint of the light. I took the liberty to ask my brother if the light did not offend him; for I told him my wife could not bear so much without spectacles.—"What is that spectacle?" says he.—"Something I made your sister," says I, "to prevent the inconvenience of too much light upon her eyes."—He said the light was scarce at all troublesome to him, for he had been in much greater, and was used to it; and that the glumms, who travelled much abroad, could bear more light than the gawrys, who stayed much at home: these stirring but little out unless in large companies, and that of one another, and very rarely admitted glumms amongst them before marriage. For his own part, he said, he had an office at Crashdoorpt, * which, though he executed chiefly by a deputy, obliged him to reside there sometimes for a long season together; that being a more luminous country than Arndrumnstake, light was become familiar to him; for it was very observable that some who had been used to it young, though they might in time overcome it, yet at first it was very uneasy.
* The country of the Slits.
I was upon the tenter whilst he spoke, lest, before he had done, a question I had a thousand times thought to have asked my wife, should slip out of my head, as it had so often done before, and was what I had for years desired to be resolved in; viz., what the meaning of the word slit was, when applied to a man. So, on his pausing, I said that his mention of Crashdoorpt reminded me of inquiring what crashee meant, when applied to a glumm or gawry. "It would be no hard task," he said, "to satisfy me in respect of that, as I already understood the nature of the graundee;" whereupon he went on thus: "Slitting is the only punishment we use to incorrigible criminals: our method is, where any one has committed a very heinous offence, or, which is the same thing, has multiplied the acts of offence, he has a long string tied round his neck, in the manner of a cravat; and then two glumms, one at each end, take it in their hands, standing side by side with him; two more standing before him, and two behind him; all which in that manner take flight, so that the string keeps the criminal in the middle of them: thus they conduct him to Crashdoorpt, which lies farther on the other side of Arndrumnstake than this arkoe does on this side of it, and is just such an arkoe as ours, but much bigger within the rocks. When they come to the covett they alight, where my deputy immediately orders the malefactor to be slit, so that he can never more return to Normnbdsgrsutt, or indeed by any means get out of that arkoe, but must end his days there. The method of slitting is thus: The criminal is laid on his back with his graundee open, and after a recapitulation of his crimes, and his condemnation, the officer with a sharp stone slits the gume * between each of the filuses ** of the graundee, so that he can never fly more. But what is still worse to new-comers, if they are not very young, is the light of the place, which is so strong that it is some years before they can overcome it, if ever they do."
This discourse gave me a great pleasure; thereupon I repeated the dialogue that had passed between me and Youwarkee about my being slit, and how we had held an argument a long time, without being able to come at one another's meaning. "But pray, brother," says I, "how comes that light country to agree so well with you?"—"Why," says he, "the colambat *** of Crashdoorpt is reckoned one of the most honourable employments in the state, by reason of the hazard of it, and the person accepting it must be young: it was, by my father's interest at court, given to me at nine years of age; my friend Rosig has followed my fortune in it ever since, being much about my age, and has a post under me there: in short, by being obliged to be so much there, and from so tender an age too, I have pretty well inured myself to any light."
* The membrane.
** Ribs.
*** Government.
By this time we had got home again to dinner, which Pedro had set out as elegantly as my country could afford, consisting of pickles and preserves, as usual, a dish of hard eggs, and boiled fowls with spinage.
My guests, as I expected, stared at the fowls, but never offered to touch them, or seemed in the least inclined to do so. I was afraid they would be cold, and begged them to let me help them. I put a wing on each of their plates, and a leg on my own; but perceiving they waited to see how I managed it, I stuck in my fork, cut off a slice, dipped it in the salt, and put it in my mouth. Just as I did they did, and appeared very well pleased with the taste. "I never in my life," says Rosig, "saw a crullmott*of this shape before;" and laid hold of a leg (taking it for a stick I had thrust in, as he told me afterwards), intending to pull it out; but finding it grew there, "Mr. Peter," says he, "you have the oddest-shaped crullmotts that ever I saw; pray what part of the woods do they grow in?"—"Grow in?" says I.—"Aye," says he, "I mean whether your crullmott-trees are like ours or not?"—"Why," says I, "these fowls are about my yard and the wood too."—"What!" says he, "is it a running plant like a bott?" **—"No, no," says I, "a bird that I keep tame about my house; and these (showing him the eggs) are the eggs of these birds, and the birds grow from them."—"Pr'ythee," says Quangrollart, "never let's inquire what they are till we have dined; for my brother Peter will give us nothing we need be afraid of."
* A fruit like a melon.
** A gourd.
It growing into the night by that time we rose from table, I set a bowl of punch before them, made with my treacle and sour ram's-horn juice, which they pulled off plentifully. After some bumpers had gone round, I desired my brother to proceed where he left off, in the account of my wife's reception with her father.
"When my father," says he, "had recovered himself by some hours' repose, the first thing he did was to order my sister Youwarkee to be called; who, coming into his presence, he took her from her knees, kissed her, and ordered all to depart but myself and Hallycarnie. Then bidding us sit down, says he to your wife, 'Daughter, your appearance, whom I have so long lamented as dead, has given me the truest cordial I could have received, and I hope will add both to my health and years. I have heard you suspect my anger for some part of your past conduct (for he had hinted so to her sister and me), which you justly enough imagined may be censured; but, my dear life, I am this day, what I did not expect any more to be, a father of a new-born child; and not of one only, but of many; and this day, I say, daughter, shall not be spent in sorrow and excuses, or anything to interrupt our mutual felicity; neither will I ever hereafter permit you to forget my forgiveness, or attempt to palliate any of your proceedings; for know, child, that a benevolence freely bestowed is better than twice its value obtained by petition: I, therefore, as in presence of the Great Image, your brother and sister, at this instant erase from my mind for ever what thoughts I may have had prejudicial to the love I ever bore you, as I will have you to do all such as may cloud the unreserved complacency you used to appear with before me. And now, Quangrollart,' says he, 'let the guard be drawn out before my covett, and let the whole country be entertained for seven days; proclaim liberty to all persons confined; and let not the least sorrow appear in any face throughout my colambat.'
"I retired immediately, and gave the necessary orders for the speedy despatch of my father's commands, which indeed were performed to the utmost; and nothing for seven days was to be heard through the whole district of Arndrumnstake but joy and the name of Youwarkee.
"My father, so soon as he had despatched the above orders, sent for the children before him, whom he kissed and blessed, frequently lifting up his eyes in gratitude to the Great Image for the unexpected happiness he enjoyed on that occasion; and then he ordered Youwarkee to let him know what had befallen her in her absence, and where she lived, and with whom.
"Youwarkee was setting out with some indirect excuses; but my father absolutely forbid her, and charged her only to mention plain facts, without flourishes. So she began with her swangean, and the accidental fall she had, your taking her in after it, and saving her life. She told him your continued kindness so wrought upon her, that she found herself incapable of disesteeming you, but never showed her affection, till, having examined every particular of your life, and finding you a worthy man, she could not avoid becoming your wife; and she said the reasons why she always declined being seen by her friends in their swangeans, was for fear she should be forced from you, though she longed to see us; and that at last she was to come by your consent, and that, had it rested there only, she might have come much sooner, for that you would often have had her show herself to her friends, when you heard them, having strong desires yourself to be known to them.
"My father, upon hearing this, was so charmed with your tenderness and affection to his daughter, that you already rival his own issue in his esteem, and he is persuaded he can never do enough for you or your children.
"The noise of Youwarkee's return, and my father's rejoicing, soon spread over all Normnbdsgrsutt; and King Georigetti sent express to my father, to command him to attend with your wife and children at Brandleguarp, his capital. Thither accordingly we all went with a grand retinue, and stayed twenty days. The king took great delight, as well as the ladies of the court, to hear Youwarkee and her children talk English, and in being informed of you and your way of life; and so fond was Yaccombourse (who, though not the king's wife, is instead of one) of my nephew Tommy, that, upon my father's return, she took him to herself, and assured my sister he should continue near her person till he was qualified for better preferment. The king's sister Jahamel would also have taken Patty into her service; but she begged to be permitted to attend her mother to Arndrumnstake; so Hallycarnie, her sister, who chose to continue with Jahamel, was received in her room.
"Upon my father's return to Arndrumnstake, he found no less than fifteen expresses from several colambs, desiring to rejoice with him on the return of his daughter, with particular invitations to him and her to spend some time with them. My father, though he hates more pomp than is necessary to support dignity, could do no less than severally visit them, with Youwarkee, attended by a grand retinue, spending more or less days with each; hoping when that was over, he should have some little time to spend in retirement with his daughter before her departure, who now began to be uneasy for you, who, she said, would suffer the greatest concern in her absence: but upon their return from those visits, at about the end of four months' progress, they found themselves in as little likelihood of retirement as the first day; for the inferior colambs were continually posting away, one after another, to perform their respects to my father, and all the inferior magistrates of smaller districts sending to know when they might be permitted to do the same. Poor Youwarkee, who saw no end of it, expressed her concern for you in so lively a manner to my father, that finding he could by no means put a stop to the goodwill of the people, and not bearing the thoughts of You-warkee's departure till she had now received all their compliments, he resolved to keep her with him till the next winter set in in these parts, and then to accompany her himself to Graundevolet. In the meanwhile, that you might not remain in an uneasy suspense what was become of my sister, he ordered me to despatch messengers express to inform you of the reasons of her stay; but I told him, if he pleased, I would execute that office myself, with my friend Rosig, with which he was very well pleased, and enjoined me to assure you of his affection, and that he himself was debtor to you for the love and kindness you had shown his daughter.
"Thus, brother," says Quangrollart, "I hope I have acquitted myself of my charge to your satisfaction, and it only now remains that I return you my acknowledgments for your hearty welcome to myself and friend; which (with concern I speak it) I am afraid I shall not have an opportunity to return at Arndrumnstake, the distance being so immensely great and you not having the graundee. To-morrow morning my friend and I will set out on our return home."
Quangrollart having done, I told him I could not but blush at the load of undeserved praises he had laid on me; but as he had received his notion of my merits from a wife too fond to let my character sink for want of her support, it would be sufficient if himself could conceive of, and also represent me at his return, in no worse a light than other men; and though it gave me pain to think of losing my wife so long, yet his account of her health and the company he assured me she would return in, would doubly compensate my loss; and I begged of him, if it might be with any convenience, he would let some messenger come the day before her, to give me notice of their approach. As to their departure on the morrow, I told them I could by no means think of that, as I had proposed to catch them a dinner of fresh fish in the lake, and to show them my boat, and how and where I came into this arkoe, believing, by what I had observed, it would be no small novelty to them. So, having engaged them one day more, we parted for that night to rest.
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