Soft eyed seraphic kuss

With limber legs and lily on the side,

We greet you from the raw

And uncouth West.

The cowboy yearns to yank thee

To his brawny breast and squeeze

Thy palpitating gizzard

Through thy vest.

Come to the mountain fastness,

Oscar, with thy low neck shirt

And high neck pants;

Fly to the coyote's home,

Thou son of Albion,

James Crow bard and champion aesthete

From o'er the summer sea.

Sit on the fuzzy cactus, king of poesy,

And song,

Ride the fierce broncho o'er the dusty plain,

And le' the zephyr sigh among thy buttery locks.

Welcome thou genius of dyspeptic song,

Thou bilious lunatic from far-off lands.

Come to the home of genius,

By the snowy hills.

And wrestle with the alcoholic inspiration

Of our cordial home.

We yearn

To put the bloom upon thy alabaster nose,

And plant the jim-jams

In thy clustering hair.

Hail, mighty snoozer from across the main!

We greet thee

With our free, untutored ways and wild

Peculiar style of deadly beverage.

Come to the broad, free West and mingle

With our high-toned mob.

Come to the glorious Occident

And dally with the pack-mule's whisk-broom tail;

Study his odd yet soft demeanor,

And peculiar mien.

Tickle his gambrel with a sunflower bud

And scoot across the blue horizon

To the tooness of the sweet and succulent beyond.

We'll gladly

Gather up thy shattered remnants

With a broom and ship thee to thy beauteous home.

Forget us not,

Thou bilious pelican from o'er the sea.

Thou blue-nosed clam

With pimply, bulging brow, but

Come and we will welcome thee

With ancient omelet and fragrant sausage

Of forgotten years.