Tell youse somethin' about d' worser side of d' Bend!” retorted Chucky. His manner was resentful. I had put my question in a fashion half apologetic and as one who might be surprised at anything bad in the Bend. It was this lamblike method of being curious that Chucky didn't applaud. Evidently he gloried a bit in the criminal vigour of certain phases of a Bend existence.

“Mebby you t'inks there is no worser side to d' Bend! Mebby you takes d' Bend for a hotbed of innocence! Don't string no stuff on d' milky character of d' Bend. Youse would lose it one, two, t'ree, keno! see! There's dead loads of t'ings about d' Bend what's so tough it 'ud make youse sore on yourself to get onto 'em.

“Be d' way! while youse is chinnin' concernin' d' hard lines of d' Bend, I'm put in mind about Danny d' Face, who shows up from Sing Sing to-day. Say! d' Face wasn't doin' a t'ing but put up a roar all d' morn-in', till a cop shows up an' lays it out cold if d' Face don't cork, he'll pinch him.

“What was d' squeal about? Why! it's like this,” continued Chucky, settling himself where the barkeeper might know when his glass was empty. “It's all about d' Face's Bundle. When d' victim takes his little ten spaces, his Bundle mourns 'round for a brace of mont's, see! An' then she marries another guy.

“What else could youse look for? That's what I say; what could d' Face expect? Ten spaces ain't like a stretch, it's 'life,' see! D' mug who chases in an' takes a trip for ten, he's a lifer. An' you knows as well as me, even if youse ain't done time, that when a duck gets life, it's d' same as a divorce. That's dead straight! his Bundle is free to get married ag'in.

“An' that's just what d' Face's Rag does; she hooks up wit' another skate, after d' Face has had his stripes for a couple of mont's. She's no tree-toad to live on air an' scenery, so she gets hitched. I was right there, pipin' off d' play meself, when d' w'ite choker ties 'em. It was a good weddin', wit' a dandy lot of lush; d' can was passin' all d' time, an' so d' mem'ry of it is wit' me still.

“As I says, d' Face comes weavin' in this mornin', an' tries to break up what d' poipers call 'existin' conditions.' It don't go, though; d' cop cuts in on d' play an' makes it a cinch case of nit, see!

“What'll d' Face do? What can he do but screw his nut an' stan' for it? He ain't got no licence to interfere. It's a case of 'nothin' doin',' as far as d' Face's end goes. Let him charge 'round an' grab off another skirt. There's plenty of 'em; d' Face can find another wife if he goes d' right way down d' line. But he don't make no hit be hollerin', he can take a tumble to that.

“What is it railroads d' Face? He does a stunt garrotin', see! I'll tell youse d' story. Of course, d' Face is a crook.

“Now, understan' me! I ain't no crook. I'm a fakir, an' a grafter; an' I've been fly in me time an' I ain't no dub to-day, but I never was no crook, see! But, of course, born as I was in Kelly's Alley, an' always free of d' Bowery push, I hears a lot about crooks, an' has more'n one of d' swell mob on me visitin' list.

“Naw; d' Face was never in d' foist circles, nothin' fine to him. He never was d' real t'ing as a dip, an 'd' best he could do was to shove an' stall. Now an' then he toins a trick as a porch climber; but even at that I never gets a tip of any big second-story woik d' Face does.

“D' Face's best trick is d' garrote, an' it's on d' gar-rote lay dey downs d' Face when dey puts him away.

“Now-days there's a lot of sandbaggin'. Some mug comes wanderin' along, loaded to d' guards wit* booze, an' some soon duck lends him a t'ump back of d' nut wit' a sandbag, or mebby it's a lead pipe or a bar of rubber. Over goes d' slewed mug, on his map, an' d' rest is easy money, see! That's d' way it's done now.

“But in d' old times, when I'm a kid, it ain't d' sandbag; it's d' garrote. An' d' patient can be cold sober, still d' garrote goes all right. It takes two to woik it; but even at that it beats d' sandbag hands down. It's smoother, cleaner, and more like a woik-man, see! d' garrote is.

“Besides, there's more apt to be stuff on a sober party than on some stiff who's tanked. I know d' poipers is always talkin' about people gettin' a load, wit' money all over 'em; but youse can gamble! such talk is a song an' dance. I'm more'n seven years old, an' me exper'ence is, that it's a four-to-one shot a drunk is every time broke.

“But to go to d' story of how d' Face gets pinched. As I states, it's way back; not quite ten spaces (for d' Face shortens his stay at d' pen wit' good conduct time see!), an 'd' Face an' a pal, Spot Casey, who's croaked now, is out on d' garrote lay.

“D' Face is followin', an' Spot is sluggin'. Here's how dey lays out d' game. It's on Fift' Avenoo, down be Nint'. Spot's playin' round d' corner on Nint'; d' Face is woikin' about a block away on Fift' Avenoo, on d' lookout for a sucker, see! Along he comes walkin' fast, this sucker. As he passes, d' Face gives him d' size-up. He's got a spark, an' a yellow chain, an' looks like he's good for a hundred in d' long green. That does for d' Face. He lets this guy get good an' by, an' then toins an' shadows him.

“D' Face walks faster than d' sucker. It's his play to be nex', be d' time dey hits Nint', where Spot is layin' dead.

“As dey chases up, d' Face an 'd' snoozer he's out to do is bot' walkin' fast, wit 'd' Face five foot behint.

“Just before dey makes d' corner, d' Face gives d' office to Spot be stampin' onct wit' his trilby on d' sidewalk. Then he moves right up sharp, claps his right arm about d' geezer's t'roat, at d' same time grabbin' his right hook wit' his left an' yankin' his arm in tight. It shuts off d' duck's wind.

“As d' Face clenches his party, as I says, he gives him d' knee behint, an' sort o' lifts him up. At d' same instant, Spot comes chasin' round d' corner in front an' smashes his right duke into what d' prize fighters calls 'd' mark.' Yes, it's d' same t'ump that does for Corbett that day wit' Fitz.

“'That's d' stuff, Spot!' says d' Face, as d' party is slugged, an' then he sets him down be d' fence all limp an' quiet, an' goes t'rough him.

“Dey gets a super, a pin, an' quite a healt'y roll besides. He's so done up dey even gets a di'mond off one of his hooks.

“Sure! d' garrote almost puts a mark's light out. Youse can bet! after youse has been t'rough d' mill onct, youse won't t'ink, travel, nor raise d' yell for half an hour. A mark's lucky to be alive who's been t'rough d' garrote. It ain't so bad as d' sandbag at that, neither.

“How was it d' Face is took? Nit; d' cop don't get in on d' play; dey win easy. It's two weeks later when he's collared. D' Face's pal, Spot, gets too gabby wit' a skirt, who's stoolin' for d' p'lice on d' sly, an' she goes an' knocks to d' Chief!”