A mother once asked a clergyman when she should begin to educate her child, then three years old. “Madam,” was his reply, “you have lost three years already.”

As soon as the child can talk, its lessons in politeness should begin. Among a child’s first words should be “please” and “thank you.”

A child should never be allowed to leave the table, after it is old enough to understand and to say it, without asking to be excused.

A child should be taught to pass behind and not before one.

Little boys should never be allowed to keep their hats on in the house.

Children, when very young, should be taught to be generous and polite to their little visitors, and, if necessary, to give up all of anything where half will not do.

Children should be taught to “take turns” in playing games, and that no one should monopolize the pleasantest part of a game.

Children soon feel a pride in being little ladies and gentlemen, rather than in being rude and impolite.

If mothers would impress upon their children’s minds how stupid they appear when they stand staring at one without answering when addressed with “good morning” or a like salutation, they would be anxious to know what to say, and to say it.

Children do not always know what to answer when addressed. They ought to be taught, so that they may feel no embarrassment.

When children inconvenience others, they ought to be taught to say “excuse me” or “beg pardon.”

In the cars, or in any public place, a boy or a girl should always rise, and give his or her place to an older person.

A child should always learn that it is both naughty and rude to contradict, and to say “what for” and “why,” when told to do anything.

A mother who is as careful of her child’s moral nature and manners as of his physical nature, will guard him from naughty and rude playmates as closely as she would from measles or whooping-cough.

A mother should never allow any disrespect in her children’s manners toward herself, nor toward any one older than they are. They should be taught especially to reverence the aged.

Habits of politeness and kindness to the poor are of great worth, and easily formed in childhood.

Virtue is born of good habits, and the formation of habits may be said to constitute almost the whole work of education.

Habits have been compared to handcuffs, easily put on and difficult to rid one’s self of.

Those parents who regulate their lives in accordance with the commands of the Bible, find many verses which are of great assistance in teaching politeness to young children, such as, “Be ye courteous one to another,” “Be respectful to your elder,” “Do to others as ye would that they should do to you,” etc.

A child should be thoroughly trained with regard to table manners. The well-bred child will not chew his food with his mouth half open, talk with it in his mouth, nor make any unnecessary noises in eating; and he will handle his knife and fork properly.

Children should be taught that it is very rude to look into drawers or boxes, or, in fact, to meddle with or handle anything away from home that is not intended for them to play with.

Children should be made to understand that they must not ask too many questions promiscuously, such as, “Where are you going?” “What have you there?” etc.

A child should be taught never to tease a playmate’s mother, or to have its own mother teased by a playmate. Teasing should not be allowed.

Children should never be allowed to say “I won’t” and “I will,” even to each other.

Children should never be allowed to speak of an elder person by the last name without the proper prefix. They should also be taught, in addressing boys and girls, say, sixteen years of age, to use the prefix, as “Miss” or “Mr.,” before the given name; thus “Miss Alice” or “Mr. George.” In fact, all people should observe this rule in addressing the young, except in case the older person is very familiar with the younger, or in case the latter is too young to be so addressed.

Children are now taught to say, “Yes, mamma,” “What, mamma?” “Thank you, mamma,” “Yes, Mrs. Allen,” “What, Mrs. Allen?” etc., in preference to “Yes, ma’am,” “No, ma’am,” etc.

Children should be taught that it is rude to yawn without trying to suppress it, or without concealing the mouth with the hand; to whistle or hum in the presence of older persons; or to make any monotonous noise with feet or hands, beating time, etc.; to play with napkin rings, or any article at table during meal time; to pick the teeth with the fingers; to trim or clean one’s nails outside one’s room; to lounge anywhere in the presence of company; to place the elbows on the table, or to lean upon it while eating; to speak of absent persons by their first names, when they would not so address them if they were present; to acquire the habit of saying “you know,” “says he,” “says she;” to use slang words; to tattle; to hide the mouth with the hand when speaking; to point at anyone or anything with the finger; to stare at persons; to laugh at one’s own stories or remarks; to toss articles instead of handing them; to leave the table with food in the mouth; to take possession of a seat that belongs to another without instantly rising upon his return; to leave anyone without saying “good-by;” to interrupt any one in conversation; to push; to ridicule others; to pass, without speaking, any one whom they know; etc.

Some young people are not as particular as they should be about certain articles of the toilet, such as combs, brushes, etc. One should always have such things for his own individual use. It is exceedingly impolite to use any toilet article belonging to another.

It is ill-mannered to ask questions about affairs that do not concern one, or to pry into the private affairs of one’s friends. To inquire the cost of articles indiscriminately, is impudent.

If parents are not at home when visitors come in, or are too busy to see them at once, a child, in the absence of a maid, should politely show them in, offer them a comfortable chair, show them anything he thinks they will be interested in, and make every effort to entertain them agreeably until such time as his parents can take his place. He should then politely withdraw from the room.

Children and young people should early learn not to monopolize the best light or the most desirable seat in the room, but to look about when anyone enters, whether a guest or an older member of their own family, and see if by giving up their own place the new-comer may be made more comfortable.

A boy ought to show to his mother and sisters every attention he would show to any other woman. Should they chance to meet on the street he should politely raise his hat. He should allow them to pass first through a door, give them the inside of the walk, help them into a carriage, and everywhere and under all circumstances treat them with politeness and deference. Girls should of course treat their brothers in the same polite manner; for they can hardly expect to receive attentions where they are unwilling to bestow them.

Children, especially little boys, should be taught not to precede their mothers, or any woman, into theaters, street cars, churches, elevators, or into the house or even a room.

SCHOOL-ROOM ETIQUETTE.

If teachers realized the inestimable amount of good they might accomplish by giving a little time and thought to the manners of their pupils, surely they would willingly give it. Those of their pupils who have no proper training at home would thus gain a knowledge which, in after life, would prove a blessing. And such a course acted upon by the teacher would be of great assistance to the parents of those who are well trained at home; for a large portion of a child’s time is spent in school, and under conditions that require such training.

Teachers must treat their scholars politely if they expect polite treatment from them.

Every teacher should see that no pupil is allowed to treat those of a lower station in life with disrespect.

It is a common occurrence for a teacher to speak with seeming disrespect of a pupil’s parents, blaming them for the pupil’s lack of interest in school, truancy, etc. Such a course is highly reprehensible in the teacher, and gains the pupil’s ill-will. It is better to assume that the parents would be displeased with anything wrong in the pupil, and to appeal to the pupil for his mother’s or father’s sake.

A teacher should never allow herself or himself to be addressed by pupils as “Teacher,” but as Miss or Mr. Smith.

If pupils would take pains to bid a teacher “good-morning” and “good-night,” they would appear well in so doing, and easily give pleasure to another.

The entire atmosphere of a school-room is dependent upon trifles. Where a teacher, by her own actions and in accordance with her requirements, insures kindness and politeness from all to all, she may feel almost sure of the success of her school.

Young misses ought to be addressed by the teacher as “Miss Julia,” “Miss Annie.” Young boys (too young to be addressed as Mr.) should be addressed as “Master Brown,” “Master Jones,” etc.

Teachers should use great discretion in reproving any unintentional rudeness, especially on the part of those ignorant from lack of home training. If such were reproved gently and privately, it would be more efficacious and just. No one should be allowed to appear to disadvantage from ignorance.

Selfishness, untruthfulness, slang, rowdyism, egotism, or any show of superiority should be corrected in the school-room.

Young teachers hardly realize with what fear and dread mothers intrust to them their carefully reared children, especially young ones.