Kind reader, when you 'phone don't ask for me
Enquiring how a Flossie should be won—
There isn't any Rule Book, are you on?
And Queenie can't be coaxed by recipee.
Some girls like hard-luck music, minor key,
Some like the Gas-car Gussie act, hot ton,
Others are simply fierce for Jolly John
Who loves to make a noise like repartee.

None but the Nerve, say I, deserves the Fair,
And stony hearts can't stand up long to chin.
If Willie-on-the-doormat lingers there
The chances are he'll be Invited In.
Up against Love the Candy Kid is nix;
The Porous Plaster wins because it sticks