T There’s no doubt at all about it,” said the rajah, relighting his cigar. “It’s perfectly easy, if you know how to do it. The skepticism of the West is nothing less than disgusting.” The rajah had come to Oxford to complete his education and endue himself with the culture of Europe; and he sat in my rooms, in a frock-coat of perfect cut (he always wore a frock-coat), smoking one of my weeds and drinking a whisky-and-soda. The rajah took to European culture with avidity, and I have very little doubt that he learned many new “Can you do it?” I asked. “I should hope so,” said the rajah contemptuously. “If I couldn’t do that, I’d turn Mahommedan.” “I wish you’d teach me.” The rajah took in a deep puff of smoke. “You’re sure you could manage it?” he asked. “I beg your pardon?” “Well, of course, like anything else, an astral body must be treated with tact, or it gets out of hand.” “Does it?” “Why, yes; you must be firm and yet kind. Don’t let it take liberties, or you don’t know where it will land you. I rather doubt if I ought to show you.” I implored him to do so. I was young, rash, self-confident, and I thought I could manage an astral body as easily as I did the dean. “Don’t blame me if you find it too much for you, that’s all,” said the rajah. “And of course you must promise not to tell anyone.” “Oh, must I?” “Yes, you must; because it’s “That would be rather a bore.” “Beastly,” said the rajah; “but of course they insist on it, because they get the fees.” He swore me to secrecy by all manner of oaths, and lastly on my word as a gentleman; and then he showed me. I practiced all that evening, and was tolerably proficient by the time the rajah knocked out his last pipe and went off to bed. I must not tell how it is done, as I promised not to; besides, if anyone reads this narrative through, he will never want to know. At first it was very convenient. I always used to project it to chapel instead of going myself. It did capitally there, because it “Well, how do you like it?” asked the rajah one day in Quad. “My dear fellow, it’s splendid,” I answered. “It’s up in town, being measured for trousers, now. You can’t think how much trouble it saves.” The rajah smiled and shook his head. “Be moderate,” he said. “You “Will it? What will it do?” “Why, if it’s always being projected, it’s as likely as not it’ll learn the trick of it, and take to projecting itself. Then you’ll be left in the lurch.” “What shall I do then?” “I don’t see what you can do,” said the rajah, scratching his head. “Of course, I should merely report it at headquarters; but you can’t, because you’ve no business with it at all.” “Well, I shan’t grudge it a holiday now and then,” I said magnanimously. The rajah was right. It did begin to take French leave. Several times when I wanted it I found it had, without a word of apology, projected itself off to Iffley or somewhere, and was not “I ought to have a little relaxation,” it answered sulkily. “I never heard of such a thing in connection with you. Isn’t it enough for you to meditate in four dimensions when you’re not at work? That would satisfy most people.” “It’s all very well in Thibet,” it grumbled; “but a fellow doesn’t come to Oxford to do that.” “One would think you had nothing to do with me. You seem to forget that you are simply a projection of mine.” We had some high words and At half-past nine I went to an “At Home” at Professor Drayton’s. As a rule, “At Homes” are dull; but I had a reason for going to this one. The professor had a very pretty daughter, and I was vain enough to think that my presence was welcome to her. In fact, we were great friends, and I had not been at the house a quarter of an hour before I had forgotten all my worries with my unruly I woke up next morning, determined to have it out with it. I found, as I expected, that it had waited till I was asleep; then it slunk in and united without my knowing it. I went and paid my I was not to be beaten. I came back to college at a run, and made straight for the rajah’s rooms. It was on the lookout for me. As I ran by my oak, which I had to pass, it rushed out on me, united, and projected me back again to Magdalen Bridge. This happened three times. Then I sat down in the Parks, just where I I had a fearful week of it. Of course, wherever I was, it could unite at once by just thinking of me; and, directly it had united, it used, I believe out of pure malice, to project me somewhere where I did not want to go. It was lucky for me that it was new to the business; its powers were as yet very undeveloped, and, consequently, it did not carry very far. If it could, I am sure it would have sent me to the Antipodes; but as it was, I never went further than the University boat-house—a pretty tidy step on a bad morning. Still, it was improving; and I felt that I must act at once if I did not want to be a permanent wanderer on the face of the earth. My only chance was to engross Suddenly I saw Bessie Drayton just in front of me. In delight at seeing her, I forgot about it, and, quickening my pace, overtook her, and lifted my hat. She smiled divinely, saying, “Why, Mr. Nares, I just going to write——” At that moment, I did not waste time in swearing. I ran like the wind back to college, hoping that Bessie’s society would prevent it coming after me till I had spoken to the rajah. I still retained one pull over it. In order to unite, it had to come where I was; it could not resume By a blessed chance, the rajah was at home, and in trembling haste I poured my story into his ear. He burst out laughing. “I was afraid of it!” he gasped, holding his sides. “How splendid!” I restrained my annoyance, and after a time he became a little more grave. “Do help me!” I urged. “It may unite at any moment, and project me the deuce knows where.” “Oh, it’ll be all right with the young lady.” “Not for long. She’s very particular, and won’t let it walk far with her.” “Oh, then we must act. You don’t feel it yet?” “No; but do be quick!” The rajah sported his oak, took off his coat, lay down on the floor, and went into strong convulsions. I regretted putting him to so much trouble, but my need was urgent, and I knew that he was a good-natured man. Presently he cried (and I was just getting alarmed about him): “Are you there, Nani-Tal?” “Certainly,” said an old white-haired gentleman, dressed in a sheet, who sat in the rajah’s armchair. “That’s all right,” said the rajah, getting up and putting on his coat. “You were very difficult.” “We’re so busy just now,” said Nani-Tal apologetically. “I’m demonstrating three nights a week, and the preparations take all my time.” “Well, you can’t have a boom “I don’t complain,” said Nani-Tal; “I only mentioned it to excuse myself for keeping you waiting. I was in New York when you began materializing. It’s a lively city.” “You must tell him all about it,” said the rajah to me; “he won’t be very hard on us.” Nani-Tal was, however, rather severe. He said it was too bad of the rajah. How were they to live, if that sort of thing went on? Then he turned to me, and added, “Of course you couldn’t manage it. If you’d gone through the course, you would have been all right. But there, it’s everything for nothing nowadays!” “My friend couldn’t go to Thibet.” “He might have paid the fees We smoothed him down with the promise of a handsome donation, and at last he consented to help us. It was only just in time, for at that very moment I felt my Astral Body uniting. A second later it made a violent effort to project me; of course, it saw Nani-Tal, and knew it was in for it. The old gentleman was too quick for it. “Come out of that!” he cried imperiously, and the wretch stood in the middle of the room. It did my heart good to hear Nani-Tal fall on the creature. After giving it no end of a lecture, he concluded, “And now, young man, you’ll just go back to your jackal for a thousand years, and learn better manners.” The wretch protested; it asked for an elephant or even a tiger. Nani-Tal was obdurate. “A jackal will just suit you,” he said. “Be off!” The creature vanished. Simultaneously Nani-Tal began to disintegrate. “Wait a bit!” cried the rajah. “I can’t. I’m summoned to St. James’ Hall. There’s a large audience, and the professor has been in convulsions seven minutes.” I tried to grasp his hand in thanks. “If you want another,” he said, “you must go through the course—the full course. There’s no other way. Let this be a lesson to you.” And with this parting remark he disintegrated. The rajah lit a cigar, and I, lighter at heart than I had been for many days, followed his example. “It was wrong of me,” said the rajah; “I won’t do it again.” “It’s a pity it turned out so badly,” I remarked; “it was quite a comfort at first.” “They’re all like that, unless you keep a tight hand on them. Shall you take the course?” “Not I. I’ve had enough of it.” “Perhaps you’re right. Excuse me; I have to go to the Deccan on business.” He fell back on the sofa, apparently in a trance, and I went off to the dean’s lecture. It makes all the difference whether you know how to do a thing or not. |