When Mallory worked in the shops
He drank up the wages he earned.
Now that he’s out of a job
He’s docile and kind to his wife
And dawdles the baby all day.
Old Horton used to say that Mallory
Was a good mechanic and a bad father.
Thus do critics fall out—Now that Old Horton
Is dead
He could not reverse his opinion
Nor the marble slab on his grave.
Joe Mallory was always Jack’s chum; so Jack got after
His friends.... Now he’s delighted and proud
For he found Mallory a job
Which Mallory thoroughly liked and took
For the price of giving up drink.