Some Instructions given me by our Grand master-Thief.

After I was sworn, and full bowls of Sack had trould round, our grand Master-Thief, composing his Countenance, and looking very gravely, Come my new and young Knight of the Road, be ruled by me, whose long experience makes me able to command, and my love to you willing to instruct you. Ever lurk or lie in some by-place most advantageous and least suspitious which yields the eye the prospect of the Road: so strictly view the Booties, that other mens misfortunes may enrich your condition, and the honest mans loss be your gain; and be sure you draw every advantage that may promote your cause, to the longest extent. For your Masks and Chin-cloth, thus must you place them and fit them at a moment to disguise your face, thereby to blind the intellects of such as by constraint pay tribute to your wants; who then can know & with considerate heed directly swear you are the man, when these artificial vizards are withdrawn, and so the visible tokens vanish that might inform mens knowledge what you are? and that your words may have a different sound, alter your voice, that so as your habit, face, and haire obscure your discovery, your speech (reputed undisguiseable) will add to your concealment and security.

Be sure you ingeniously contrive a Watch-word to your selves that may occasion no suspition; as, we are like to have a fair day or a foul, according as the weather is like to prove; which being nam’d, let every man fall to his work; those that are strongest at the grasp, and have hearts accordingly, let them seize first, alwayes duly observing this, to catch the bridle by the left hand, and with the right draw your Sword. If he or they resist, the one prevents his flight, the other cuts, and so cools his courage. The weaker sorts charge is to bid stand, and confronting the Horses head, present a Pistol fit for to discharge. If they deny delivering patiently what they have, but contend, you must wave all niceties, but cut them soundly; if that will not qualifie their foolish presumption, be sure you fire not without doing Execution, and then with all speed fly, after you have with expedition taken the pillage of the field.

If you are pursu’d by an Hue and Cry, obscure your self in some place or other, and let it pass by you, and then to be sure it will never overtake you. If a prize comes by, or in your sight, if up the Hill, meet him; if down, follow close at the heels, and having more in company then your self, let each man single out his choice which he likes to deal with: the coast being clear, fall up all to your close order and side, be sure that you joyntly seize your prize. But here observe, let not any baseness of spirit unman you. For (speaking to me) nature hath bestow’d on you the full proportion of limbs, and thou seem’st a man of courage, suitable to the largeness of thy manly size, but be not surpriz’d with fear or cowardise if the assailed boldly assaults thee.

Full fraught with the Documents which I receiv’d from my old experienced Master, I resolv’d upon some atchievement: between two and three in the afternoon, I my self with four more set out; we planted our selves in a convenient place, only I was sent out for a discoverer: not rightly understanding my trade, I wandered too far, but in my digression I met with a single person whom I bid stand, which he would have done, and as willingly have surrendred his purse, but that he was mounted on a stone-horse, I on a Mare. Assoon as I had given the word, his stone-horse wheel’d off and came in the rear of me: I thinking he intended to crupper me, endeavoured all wayes imaginable to prevent him, for there was something it seems under my Mares tail more powerful, which at that time I dreamt not of. I led him round and round several times circularly: the poor harmless Gentleman fearing he should provoke me too much by delays, the unruliness of his Horse hindring my seising the Booty, cry’d out, Worthy Sir, take what I have and spare my life: at that very instant his Horse reared his two fore-feet upon me and my Mare, in so much that I thought he said, I’le take both Life and Money too presently; fear had then rendred me so incapable of performing the office of a Thief. With that I put spurs to my Mare, and flew through the air for the procuration of my safety. Notwithstanding I made what speed I could, the other was close at my heels: striving and kicking with both my legs, one of my Pistols went off in my Pocket: the apprehension of the present danger had bereft me of the true use of my sense, for I imagined that my back-friend had discharged at me, which made me roar out for quarter. He on the contrary concluded I fought Tartar-like flying, and that I had fired it at him, which made him with much eagerness eccho out with repetition this expression, As you are a man, shew your self merciful. Sometimes he would say, For heavens sake hold, good Sir stop; which made me ride more furiously, thinking he called to the Country, Hold him, stop him; at last do what I could, his Stone-horse leapt up upon us, at that instant (by what means I know not) we all came headlong to the ground. I expected now that my imaginary adversary would be upon me, and cut my throat before I could recover my legs, wherefore I started up, and found my mortal foe up before me, and upon the run. I could have hang’d my self to think I should be reckoned among the number of men, and yet want that spirit and courage which compleats a man: but loosing no time, I pursu’d him, and easily made my self possessor of what he had; Sirrah, said I, if e’re I meet thee again, and find thee so obstinate, or durst resist, as now thou hast done, I will tye thee to a Tree in some obscure place, where none can hear thy doleful cryes, and there for six days thou shalt have no other food but what I shall bring thee. Once a day during that term I will visit thee, and each days Meat shall be either a piece of thine own Sword broken into small bits, or those Bullets (which thou intendest for the destruction of honest men) dissolv’d, and mingled with Gunpowder, which shall be convey’d to thy mouth through the muzzle of thine own Pistol. It pleased me exceedingly to see how pitifully and submissively he look’t: for verily I durst not have utter’d half so much if he had shown an austere countenance.

As I was framing a lye to delude my Comerades (when I should meet them) into a belief how valiant I was, and dextrous in prosecution of that design I had newly undertaken, I lookt about me & saw them all at my elbow. I now believ’d (which I easily perceiv’d by their flearing looks) that they were all eye-witnesses of my dangerous encounter. Oh brother, said one, how is’t? are you well? I askt him the reason of his impertinent question? Because, said he, we took notice of the great danger you were in even now, narrowly escaped of being shot by a Pocket-Inkhorn. Without doubt, brother, you are very hard hearted to fly (riding full speed) at the very naming of, Good Sir be merciful. The poor harmless soul making frequent repetition thereof, but you stopping your ears from all intreaties, his Stone horse seem’d to be his advocate, and to that intent ran after your Mare, endeavouring to court her into an intercession for his Master.

I should never have stopt their mouths had I not shew’d them what I had gotten, which was not inconsiderable.

It was twy-light as we met with another Prize, which was of a different temper from the former. For though he and his fellow-traveller were (comparatively to any of us) but Pigmies, yet of so undaunted resolution and unresistable courage, that neither threats of death, or torture (I am confident) could dull the edges of their couragious spirits, which might be in part understood by their deportment to us: for had we not slasht, carbonadoed, and forceably bound them, rather then they would have yielded willingly, they would have stoopt to death. Our power having subdued them, we withdrew them into a secret place, leaving them not any thing valuable. Then did I learn to search with so strict care, that sooner might the Grand Turk turn Roman Catholick then conceal a penny from me; here was I taught to be deaf when the poor Traveller cries he is undone; and to be more flinty then Adamant, not to be mov’d with sighs or tears. Having ingag’d them by Oath not to follow us by Hue and Cry, or by means of a general rising of the Towns adjacent; these two fellows robbed, rifled and amazed, we left wrapt up in woes, and hasted away to secure ourselves.

I shall conclude this Chapter with a Relation how I was quit with my Comrades upon the account of fear or timorousness. Neither could they justly tax me with it, since they are things entail’d upon the profession. For every Crow that flies extracts a fear, and every thing that doth but stir, or make the bushes rush, seem’d to our fearful fancy a Constable to apprehend us for our Theft. I cannot forget how strong a confusion arose amongst us by a trifle; the means were so small, and the occasion so ridiculous, that when after I thought thereon (though by my self) I could not forbear laughing excessively, and condemn the temerity of such minds so meanly spirited. ’Twas thus in short: An Owle who to gain shelter from the troubles of a Sunshine day, when all the airy tribe (wandring) flock to him, screen’d himself in the obscure retired residence of an hollow tree; no sooner had he cloister’d up himself, but between discontent and something of a pleasing satisfaction he first utter’d his amazing screeks, being in a slumber, and dreaming of the assaults were made at him by his feather’d enemies of all sorts, and then again awaking, whoopt for joy that he was delivered from them; thus did he whoop and hollow incessantly, which infus’d such a terrour into our distrustful minds, that Whips, Switches and Spurs were all too few to expedite our hast. For we absolutely thought those Hollows were the out-cryes of the Country following us for what we had committed. We at length took Sanctuary in an Inn, where we had some interest and confidence in our security.

Understanding that our days work had been prosperous, our Host calls lustily for Sack, which the drawer doubles in the Bar; the Hostler must be one of our company too, and hail fellow with us, who knowing what courses we take, presume we dare not cavil, lest they betray our practises. Sic nos non nobis. So we rob for them, and not for our selves; for by that time we have profusely frolickt (a bill whereof shall be brought in of twice as much as we called for) and have bestowed our largesses to the Servants, and offer’d up our (expected) sacrifices to our Landlady, or her Daughter, for some private favour received, we find our selves to have the least share, and so betake our selves to our trade till apprehension take from us that liberty, and the Law sentenceth us to pay our lives as a just debt we owe to Justice.