He is shipt for a Plantation. He gives an account of the Passengers aboard, relating what kind of Cattle they were, and discovers from their own mouths, things very observable, in some of their Lives and Conversations.

The soreness of my flead back had so taken me off my mettle, that for three days, I did little more than eat and sleep; but hating thus to truant away my life without acting or observation; I pull’d up a good heart, resolving to make the best of a bad Market; the first thing I had to do was to get my Cargo aboard, not knowing how, or whom to trust. I saw there was no way more feisable than to acquaint our Master herewith: wherefore one Morning, seeing him enter his Cabin alone, I followed him close at the heels, and falling presently on my knees, I begg’d him in the most commiserating terms my invention would afford, that he would not only be secret in what I should discover to him, but also be assistant to me. What, Sirrah (said he) have you some new piece of Roguery to act, and would you have me to be your accomplice in it? Far be it from me, Sir, said I; the Fact is already done, and by what means known: but the purchase none knows but myself where it is, wherefore all that I desire is, that discovering the place, you will lend me your assistance to bring it hither, Sir, it is a just thing I beg of you; I have suffered the Law; and therefore it is mine; The very Turks condemn that as lawful prize to the use of the theevish Slave, that can carry it off (though but over the Threeshold) without being taken notice of; so I hope, as I have been cleanly in my conveyance, so my punishment will authorise and clear the purchase. Hearing me plead so notably and pittying my condition, told me that none should be concerned in the securing of my dear bought Goods but himself, and therefore commanded me to tell him where they were; which accordingly I did, and he thereupon immediately fetcht them, locking them up in his own custody, and promising me, as soon as they were Landed, restitution; and that you shall not suspect, Sirrah (said he) that I will embezel any of them, you shall have an Inventory of them, which was thus: Imprimis Six pair of Worsted Stockins, one pair of Children Shoees, five clean Pipes, two Blew Leather Points, one Pair of Boys Shoes, Two Brass Thimbles, one Alchymy Spoon, one sawcer, one Knitting sheath and four Needles with it, one old Womans pair of eyes, (Spectacles I mean) which I stole from her Nose as she slept at her own dore, two Horn-books, the pillage of Two Children going to School; besides Giggs, Bouling-stones, Marbles, and Span-Bounters innumerable.

As my Master was taking in writing an exact account of my Estate, I thought he would have crackt a Gut by his excessive laughter; but when that stitch-begetting-tickling humour would give him leave, he askt me, what I intended to do with these commodities when I Landed? or what Merchant I had advised withal in the proper transportation of these Goods? Or whether (said he, laughing aloudly) have you received any Letters of advice from your Correspondence beyond Sea? He was not so jocundly vain as I was really serious, which so increast his laughter, that I was forc’d to exercise a great deal of patience, before I could have liberty to return him suitable Answers to his Questions. At length without the least alteration of my countenance I told him, that what I had collected to my great cost and labour, I thought were as proper for transportation to that place we were bound to, as I had consulted the principal Merchants of Europe; for there is nothing said I in all my Cargo but what is very useful, and that to all sorts of Persons, Sexes, or Ages. For my stockins, Points, &c. will very well accommodate either Male or Female; the Knitting-sheath and Thimbles, for the young Wenches; the Spectacles, I guess, may serve any old Woman from Threescore to an Hundred; the Horn-Books they may teach their Children by, to read; and let me alone with the Gigs, Bowling-stones and Counters to teach them to play, I mean, Sir, not to play with them, but for them, and if I win (as I know I shall) their purchasing them again, shall be my daily gain.

He seem very well pleased to hear me make such silly Propositions to my self for my future advantage; but I propounded to my self greater advantages, laid on a more solid Basis; and I did not fear my hopes would wither, or prove ineffectual, since as I plainly perceiv’d, I had my Masters love and countenance to cherish them. Being now dismist, I walkt to and fro the Ship, making my self acquainted with the Sea-men, my childishness conversing with their bruitishness, as cheerfully as possibly I could, who seemed well pleased with me, though seldom pleased with any thing else but store of strong liquors aboard, and a lusty plump Wench ashore. From aloft, I got between Decks, and there I found a many beastly fellow Travailers, Dog-like kennell’d, higglede pigglede altogether; I was heartily welcom’d in amongst them, but I was much troubled to see them so much more in years than my self, till looking narrowly about me, I espyed a young Girl of about sixteen, as I judged. O Sister, quoth I, as confidently, I am glad to see you here, but much more glad that I shall have your company in this Voyage. The Baggage at first seemed somewhat sullen and coy, but in two or three dayes we grew so inwardly acquainted; that if I were aloft, aheadahead, or abaft, or wheresoever, she would be at my elbow. One day asking her the cause of being a Shipboard, She told me, her Father and Mother dyed when she was but three years old, and left her to the tutelage of an Aunt, whose cruelty increast towards her, as she increast in years, debarring her even from that convenient sustenance that supports Life, so that she was forced to steal her Belly-timber, or be half-starved. This early-forward-fruit was well complexioned, and well featured, having a good natural Genius, attended with an extraordinary boldness, both which made me love this Cockatrice Whirligig, what shall I call her, and became at last much delighted in her conversation. Singling her out one day, we got upon the Poop together, where, after many childish flurtings, she perceiving how inquisitive and desirous I was to know what was the cause her Aunt was thus willing to part from her, by sending her to Barbadoes; she very briskly told me, she would give me the satisfaction required, and expecting she would have made a sigh to the Prologue to her following Discourse, I found it otherwise, for she smilingly thus began, to the same purpose, though not in the same words.

My Aunt doth think she hath fully revenged her self of all the injuries I have done her, by thus banishing me from her presence, and my Native Countrey, to a place I never heard of, till I was doom’d to be an Inhabitant therein; and glad I am that slavish sentence hath freed me from a more cruel doom of living under the Tyrany of a principal Shee-Divel. My Father dying, left me as I am inform’d an hundred pound, which by my Mothers death soon after was almost doubled; my Aunt, before her decease, had so insinuated into her easie nature, that she wheedled her to let this Money lie in her hands for my use, promising my mother, that if I lived to be of age, or marryed, I should have the sum intire, without substracting a penny, under what pretence soever, and would tender me as her own daughter: My Mother dying with the satisfaction of my being well provided for, I was taken into the use of my Aunt, and for a while was indifferently lookt after, going to school with her own Son and Daughter. But some years being past over my head, I found my self differenced from her Children, as much as might be, slighted, and abused, and my Couzens often beaten for their too much familiarity with me: and that which was worse, I was circumscribed of necessary provision. Having alwayes a bold daring Spirit, I troubled my self as little as I might, but made my wit and industry supply me, with what my Aunt was defective in; neither was I the sole sufferer in this affliction, the servants bearing a part with me, having no other proportion at Meals, than what her niggardly hand made dividend of, not making the meat conformable to our stomacks, but our stomacks to the meat; having dined, she lockt up all fast: The servants did not half so often grumble at her, as my Guts; and that she might know how dissatisfyed they were, I went one day with an Hammer, and nailed up the House of Office dore; she having an occasion to make use of it, could not be admitted, but being in great haste, was glad to apply her self to her own Bed-chamber, which I am sure she perfumed to the purpose. Coming down in a great rage, she enquired into the cause of this odd project, and who the authour should be. To be short, she was acquainted that it was I, who being summoned to appear before her; Huzzy, said she, was it you that nailed up the Privy door? I was forced to plead Guilty. And what was the reason (Mrs. Ne’re be good) you did so? Why truly forsooth (quoth I) you feed well and plentifully, and therefore Nature might command and require you to give her easement; and to that purpose you have in your Chamber a Close-stool; but we your servants, as we eat little or nothing, so we seldom have occasion to go to that house, which to us is altogether useless. She knew not whether she were best be angry, or pleased; but dissembling her passion, said, well Huzif, if you complain, you shall have less: the less you eat, the cleaner will be your sheets, and so left me. Seeing her ultimate resolution was to keep me short of Victuals; I resolved to try some means whereby I might feed without her knowledge. Fortune favoured me so much, that one afternoon going up into her Chamber, wherein stood a great Chest she usually laid up her provision in, I saw the Key in it, which she by forgetfulness had left behind: I presently stept to it, and opening the Lid, found there a Turkey Pie, which I made so bold with, that I took as much as would have served me three dayes, if I had eaten nothing else, and that continually. I got me down the stairs with all possible speed, to prevent discovery, and secure my Provant; I soon found a place for that purpose, and having hid it, I began to consider what I had done, and that my Aunt would soon know, who it was that frighted her Turkey away, none else but me daring to be so bold; while I was deeply musing withwith myself, our Cat came purring by me, as if she had been sent by my good Angel, to be the Sacrifice that should free me from that punishment that would inevitably attend this Crime; so taking her up in my arms, I ran up into the Chamber, and having claw’d with my Nails the flesh, and the Crust sufficiently, I committed poor Puss to answer for what I had done. My Aunt a while after missing her Key, went hastily to her Chamber, and seeing it in the Chest, condemned her own carelesness, and looking thereinto to see whether all was well, the Cat bounc’d out into her face; the suddain surprizal made her make a noise more discordant, than if twenty Screetch-Owls had been in Consort. Being alarm’d at this bellow, I was the first that got to my Aunt, and very inquisitive I was of her to know, what was the matter. Oh! said she a scurvy Cat, I negligently shut in the Chest, hath almost frighted me out of my wits, besides what other mischief she hath done me. But when she came to see what work supposedly the Cat had done, I was in good hopes that my Aunt would have taken a lodging in Bedlam.

As I laid hold on all opportunities to fill my belly, so some I studied; as for Example, twice or thrice a week we had a baked pudding; I bought me a little dish about the bigness of a Porringer, and out of the Pan I would fill it, a fruitful Pudding to have always a young one at the side on’t. The Dow which I commonly carried to the Bake-house, never went home so much in the Loaf, for I seldom failed to have a Cake out of it; both which I practised so long till my Aunt found me out, and soundly bang’d me for so doing. For these, and such like faults I was so often and so unmercifully beaten, that I was resolved to be reveng’d on her. One day she being invited abroad, I was resolved to be even with her at home in this manner, One pair of stairs she had a stately Dining-room, wherein there was a Cup-board on which (being spread with a very fine cloath) stood variety of all manner of curious Glasses, such as she valued above her Plate, and took great delight in them, being prouder of shewing those to her guests, than some are in appearing in a fine new Gown to their Sweet-hearts. These I was resolved should fall down to my revenge, and be crusht a pieces by the weight of my indignation and fury; but before I would begin to act this doleful Tragedy, I went, and made all things ready; that is to say, I took a large Spannel that we had, and leading him to the Street dore, I ran out into the middle of the Street, calling him after me; he followed me, and I led him a dance so long, till he had dirtied himself sufficiently, then going in adoors, I stole up softly the back-stairs, and the Dog following me into the Dining-room; then did I take his feet, and make them imprint the form thereof on the Cloth; having so done I pull’d the cloth, and down came the Glasses to the Floor, and by the fall not one of them escaped; this being done, I got into the next Room, and crept underneath the Bed; the fall of the Glasses soon came to the Ears of those that were below, who coming up, found none in the Room, but the Dog, and seeing the print of his claws in the Cloth, ne’re examined the matter farther, but to work they went with him, who wanting words to justifie his innocence, escaped the punishment by flight; whilst they pursued him, I stept down the stairs, without being known to have a hand in the Plot, how my Aunt resented this sad accident, I will give those leave to judge, that ever had the like loss.

But this story I am about to tell you, succeeded not so well as the former; for it fell to my own scurvy Lot, to be punished with that which might have proved a piece of Revenge, though I intended no such matter, and which was worse, detected me as the author of the former. Our Maids being in the Fields, bleaching of Clothes, my Aunt commanded me to frie some Tripes for her Dinner, which she had brought in from Market; I laying them careslycaresly upon the Dresser, whilst I was cleaning the Frying-pan, our aforesaid Dog swallowed up one half of them at one mouthful, without chewing them, and had near dispatcht the other half, before I could come to the rescue of my Aunts Dinner; I hastily threw down the Pan, which caused my Aunt to come running in, to see what was the matter; she seeing me busily and eagerly imployed about the Dog, stept back in a place covered from my sight, where she might both hear and see. I basted him so long, holding him fast, that he disgorged one parcel of the Tripes, which I taking up laid them on the Dresser; come, said I, basting him the while, this is not all you Thief; I must have more yet; the Dog, as if he had understood me, discharged himself of the Theft, and I verily believe, did not detain one single mouthful behind: so much for his honesty. So, so, said I, ’tis well, get you gone you Rogue, as long as you did as I did bid you, break my Aunts cup-board of Glasses, I made much of you, but when you turn thief, and steal, you must be beaten into better manners.

My Aunt all this while was exercising her patience even to a miracle, and would not speak a word, because she would see what I intended farther. Hereupon I took my Tripes, and giving them a rench or two in a pail of water, I dryed them, flowred them, and into the Pan they went, and fell a frying them, with as much confidence as if they had had no mischance befaln them. Being fryed with my sawce, and all other things ready, I was going in haste to call my Aunt to Dinner, as she met me, and seeming to take no notice, seats her self at the Table, and turning one piece then another, then a third, she takes the Dish, and twirls it round, saying, they were not fryed to her mind, and that I did this on purpose, that I might have them all my self, and so you shall, said she and that I may be sure you do not slight good victuals (being too much Corn-fed) I will give you leave to sit down by me for once.

I knew not what to say, which way to look, nor what to think, but perceived by my Aunts eyes, which were all of a flame, that she had discovered something that had highly offended her; I would have spoken something but she interrupted me, saying familiarly, leave off talking and eat your meat: I being somewhat backward, and she taking notice thereof; how now Mrs. Minks, (said she) is not that good enough for you, which is too good for me? Huzif, I will have none of your Dogs-leavings, and since you would not let him eat it, you shall eat it for him your self; and then I shall talk a little further with you; Seeing there was no help, I did eate of the Tripe, at every other bit, much good may do you, quoth she, eat heartily, and spare not. I chewed it like him that was gnawing a piece of his own Boots; but down it must go. When she thought I had eaten enough for that time, she fell upon me in that manner, that I had much ado to keep that I had within me, which I was resolved to do, lest she should make me fry it again to my Supper.

Having tired her self with beating me, she told me that this was not for the breaking of her Glasses, she had another of another nature for that, since she knew it was not a Dog, but a Bitch-Fox, that had done her all that mischief. Whereupon she drove me up stairs before her, and lockt me into a Room, till she had breath to talk further with me.

I was ready to die with fear to think what she intended to do with me; at nights approach she came to me with one of her Maids, and having lockt the dore to them, they unstript me, and naked as ever I was born, they tyed my hands to the Bed-post, and lasht me with WhipcordWhipcord, till she had made me all over of a gore blood. Her Son hearing by the Maid how cruelly I was delt withal, adding further, that he wondred how his Mother could be so hard hearted, as to tear my skin. Natural affection enforced him to pity me, and that pity began to increase that affection, which he hath had more than these two years for me; so that, as he confest to me afterwards there was no greater trouble to him, then that he could not condole with me in my affliction. Having been confined two or three days to my Chamber, my Aunt was persuaded to make further tryal of me, and if I proved not then answerable to her expectation, she would for ever discard me. Upon these terms I was released, and found my Couzen overjoyed that I was enlarged. He was somewhat younger than my self, about fifteen years old, of an inclination very prone to love what was youthful or beautiful; and finding me very flexible to entertain his amorous propositions, followed me so close, that he obtained what he desired.

‘Thus we continued some time together, and knowing how covetous his Mother was, and not allowing him hardly any thing to spend, I studyed how I might assist him in his expence abroad: I was one day in the Shop, and looking into the Counter for something, I found a board at the end of the Till, loose, which taking up, I could easily put in my hand, and take out what Money I pleased; having now taken out the Board, I knew not what to do; for I fastned it but very slenderly, neither could I do otherwise, having no time to do what I would. Wherefore in the morning early, before my Aunt was up, I got into the Shop, and with a small Perser I boared a couple of holes quite through the end, and two sides of the Box, and so with Wire I fastned it, to my hearts content, but not so but I could loosen it again at my pleasure. My heart leapt to think, how this project taking effect, neither I, nor my friend could want Money at any time. Could I have concealed this to my self I would have done it, and so supplyed (as I thought convenient) my Couzen with Money, the more to engage his affection to me. But I was forc’t to tell him thereof, (whom I knew as forward in any sort of wickedness as any body) because he was continually in the Shop. Having given him an account of my projection, I thought he would have been transported with joy, and was restless, till he had made an experiment; which having done, and finding my contrivance, an inexhaustible Mine to him, I thought he did intend to lock me in his arms everlastingly. Now did our freedom daily increase, and nothing obstructed them but want of liberty to enjoy them. But, as what is violent, is seldom permanent; so must our delights have an end, and so much the sooner, by how much they exceed in measure. Being not satisfied with stealing a kiss, or so forth in the day time, We pitcht upon a Night, when he should run the hazard of coming into his Mothers Chamber where I lay in a Trundle-bed under her; and be with me all night: He watcht his opportunity, staying up late, and I in pursuance of the design, had left the chamber door open, and so our desires were accomplisht. But now (a mischief on’t) we were so shackled in the fetters of a lasting sleep, that notwithstanding my Aunt bawl’d to me I know not how many times, it being late in the morning to rise and look after her business, yet I made no answer; at last started out of the Bed, and stepping to mine, to see if I were not dead, found her Son inclosed in my Arms both fast asleep. But she awakened us so hastily out of our sleeps, that we lookt like a couple of Bedlamites, and so confounded with shame, that we had not a word to say. To be short, she first resolv’d to turn me out of doors, not caring whether I went with or without Cloaths; but then considering she should disparage her Son, by shaming of me; concluded to send for the Master of the Vessel we now are in, and after some discourse I was commanded to go with him, glad I was to go any where to be out of her reach; her Son, hearing of my sad sentence, would have followed me, but was interrupted; however yesterday, attempting by the way I had found out to supply me with Money, he was catcht in the act by his Mother, and sent immediately to Prison, where I understand he is like to lie till we set Sail.’Sail.’

I was so attentive in the hearing what she related befell her, that I did eat her words as they fell from her. To retaliate her kindness, I gave an account of what I had lately run through, at least wise, as much as I thought convenient; and by this time the Seamen began to take notice of our private conference, and by our familiarity they had seen, gave their judgments openly, that they thought there would be a Westminster wedding between us, before we should arrive at our intended Port. Hereupon we broke up School, and descended straight between Decks, there we found our Comerades tongues all imployed like a Dover-Court; I for my part was resolved to be silent, that I might the better gather from them what they were, and what lewd things they had acted upon the Stage of this world.

But how often did I be-Ass my Rogueship, calling my self ten thousand Fools for having so good an opinion of my Rogueries, (thinking them no other than the very quintessence of wit) when I heard them discourse of what they had done, which they all did with more freedom, than a dying man would confess his Sins to his Ghostly Father. And so they might very well do; for being past all shame (perit cui pudor periit) and the Law having past sentence on them, they could not suffer again for the same, without a recommission.

The Wind coming about fair, and we all ready, command was given to weigh the Ankor; just as it was a Peek, and our Fore-top-sail loose, and seeing then that there was no help but that I must go, I fully purposed to have leapt overboard (so attractive is our native Soil) had not the consideration of my Estate aboard, with that of my Mis, which I must leave behind, pulled me back.

Whilst I was thus ruminating with myself, we had spread all our Canvas, the wind blowing fresh, we spoon’d away before it like an arrow out of a bow. Coming into the Ocean, I found my self possest with a new Spirit, and if there was ever any such thing as transmigration of Souls, certainly it was at that time, some new drown’d Sea-mans Soul hovering on the Deep, took up its habitation in my body, entring in at my mouth as I gap’d for breath, which the swiftness of the Ships sailing, and tossing of the Waves together, had almost totally deprived me of. I was so nimble and so active, that if I saw any halling Sheets aft, or hoising of Sail, would be sure to be with him; which our Master taking special notice of, encouraged me therein, so far that venturing first into the tops, I afterwards upon it grew so bold, that when occasion required, I often helpt to furl a Sail, but being not my Crafts-Master, being more bold than skilful, one day I was in the Main-top, and getting astride the Yard-arm, (to make my self the better acquainted with it) I dropt off into the Sea, and had we not been becalmed, I had been drowned irrecoverably. Throwing me out a Rope, I got aboard, no more concerned with the danger I escaped from, than if I had been that while asleep in a Cabbin. My Master lookt on this accident as a certain Omen of my being a Sea-man, and thereupon made me his Cabbin-boy promising me when I had served him a time according to custom, he would advance me according to my deligence and fidelity, as for my ingenuity he questioned not.

We had not been above a Month at Sea, but by imploying all the leasure time I had among my Comrades, I had gained so intimate acquaintance, and so perfect a knowledge of them, that I shall endeavour to give you a Character of them; there was nineteen of them in all, besides my Mistress, whose late Adventures I have given you an account of; and therefore shall pass her by and only tell you what the rest were, but first, what their Professions are.