Mrs. Dorothy rehearses how she cheats her Lovers; who being with Child, made all that had to do with her contribute to her expence in lying in, and recompence her lost honour. She goes into the country to lay her great Belly; in her Journey she falls into the acquaintance of a crafty Old Woman (alias: a Procurer.)

Mrs. Dorothy having thus given me an account of her first Adventure, I received much satisfaction in the Relation; and told her that I found she was much improved in cunning since my first acquaintance with her; for I had enjoyed her without much advantage to her self, for she had a great Belly, with little profit, not knowing who was, or were to find a Father: whereas now she had her choice of three, and money enough to boot whereby to purchase a handsome provision for her self and child. Yes, reply’d she, I did not intend to be caught again; for then it would have been my own fault, you having experienced me in the fallacies of your Sex; and therefore, as I told you, I made my bargain with all my three Friends as politickly as I could; and upon second thoughts, altered somewhat of the terms I had formerly agreed upon: for whereas my first Customer had given me twenty pounds in hand, to provide me with necessaries during my time of lying in, and had agreed to provide for the Child, when it should be born: I told him I had provided a Nurse for it already that was willing to take all the charge, and discharge him from any further trouble, upon payment of fourty pounds more; to this he easily consented, and gave Bond in to me, in the name of a Friend of mine; whom I told him was the Party that would make provision for the Child.

Thus did I settle matters with the first: and with the second I continued my bargain, of having twenty pounds down, and fifty pounds more at the birth of the Child. And my Masters Brother and I continued our old bargain of the like sum, of twenty pounds down, and fifty pounds more, to be paid at 6 moneths; neither did I discontinue my familiarities with any of them; for I managed my affairs so cunningly, that some nights I lay with my first Customer without the knowledge of my Master’s Brother, from whom I endeavoured only to conceal it, and not from my second for he, as I told you, was privy to my dealings with him, and by that means only first gained his ends upon me: sometimes I lay with my second Customer, but it was with some regret, for I had the least affection for him of the three; but now he since he had bled some of his yellow pieces, and give me what I desired of him, I could not well refuse him his desires of me, neither was he so shy as formerly; for he valued not though my Masters Brother sometimes discovered us, for he knew that our dealings were not concealed from him, and therefore he was the bolder. But with my Masters Brother I was more free than ever; he having as much again for his money as either of the other, neither was it perceived by either of them; for he having the command of the house, so ordered it, that my Lodging was nearest to his; and therefore we had the more conveniency to come at one another.

We drave this trade for some Moneths, till in the end my Master’s Brother gaining the goodwill of his Sweet-heart, he was married to her, and then he for some time fell off. But he had not lain with his Wife above a fortnight, but he became weary of her embraces, and renewed his love again to me; I at first withstood him, and used Arguments to disswade him from any such course; but all would not do; for he told me he found but little pleasure in the cold embraces of his Wife; neither had he married her, but for her Estate, which was considerable; many other Arguments he used to perswade me, who was not altogether unwilling; and so we again renewed our former pleasure; but we were necessitated to be very private, and only now and then to have a private meeting in the day time, for he was to accompany his Wife in the Night. But as privately, and craftily as we carried our selves, we were at length discovered; for my second Customer, after he had paid for his pleasure, was more desirous to have his penny-worths out of me, and still importuned me to interviews so often, that I much grumbled at him; and he being a weary Fox, still dogg’d and watch’d me, and that so often, that at length he found me and my Masters Brother in our strict embraces; he being both glad and angry, without any [by your leave] entered the Room where we were (the door being only carelesly put to) and without any words approaching the Bed whereon we lay, drew the Curtains, and said; well, Master John (for so was his name) that sawce which is good for the Goose, I hope will be good for the Gander; self do, self have; I hope, Sir, since you have put in for your share in the pleasure, you will be share, and share like in the charge. Well, replyed Mr. John, it shall be even as honest Mrs. Dorothy will have it; and thereupon removed, and sitting upon the Bed, I began to give him bad words, calling him jealous Coxcomb; and he again flew at me, telling me that I was insatiate, and that twenty would not serve my turn; and that now he found the reason of my slighting him, for Mr. John; but if we would not do him Justice, he would be revenged on us both: to that Mr. John replyed, asking him what he would have? I would, said he, have my money, and my Bond again; for I see, and find, there is little reason that I should pay for other mens Leachery; you make me provide for a Child, that, for ought I know, hath twenty Fathers; well, said I, you have had too much for your money; and if you are grieved, amend your self; so I will, said he, furiously going away out of the Room. He being gone, Mr. John and I fell to consulting, what was to be done in this affair; and after many propositions, we at length agreed, that it was most convenient for me to be gone from my service, and to leave London, for some Country Habitation; lest this angred Coxcomb should mischief us, by discovering our practice to Mr. John’s Wife, or some else, that was worse: I was willing, and ready to take this course; but I told Mr. John, that moneys would be wanting, to make a handsome provision for me; for as affairs now stood, there was no expecting any mony from my angred Customer, but what should be forced from him. That is true, replyed he; but so soon as the money is due, for which he hath given you Bond, I will take course with him, and compel him to pay it; and in the mean time I will furnish you. This was that which I aimed at; and I knowing that he had lately received a large sum of money for his Wifes portion, with much ease gained him to pay me the fifty pounds down, for which he had given me Bond, and being thus provided with moneys, and making up my pack (which was much improved since my coming) I prepared for my departure. I as yet knew not what Country to retire to, but was resolved not to go back into my own; and therefore consulted with Mr. John about the place; who still hankered after me, resolving I should not go far, but that he might easily visit me; appointed me a place about ten Miles from London: and because he would not be suspected of going with me, nor of being any wayes privy to my departure, he permitted me to take my Journy without him; he promising in a few dayes to take the opportunity of giving me a visit.

Thus did I leave his Brother’s House; but not so abruptly, but that I had the leave of my Master and Mistress; whom I told, that my Father being sick, had sent for me immediately; and to that end, a Letter was framed by Mr. John, and brought me by a Porter.

Being now Coach’d for my Journy, I in short time arrived at the Inn, where I was appointed to stay, till Mr. John should arrive, and make better provision for me; where an Adventure befell me, which is worthy of your hearing: For among the rest of the Travellers, there was an Antient Woman, who took great notice of me, still looking towards my Apron, and eying very diligently my belly; which although it was now somewhat greater, being about three Moneths gone with Child; yet I had endeavoured, by busking it down, and using all other means to hide it; but the Old Woman was not so dim-sighted, but she discovered the fraud; and having been a good one her self in her time, quickly smelt out the matter; and believed, and guessed the cause right, as it was; for my thinn Chops, and sharp and whitely looks gave evident testimonies of what disease I was sick of; and looking more throughly upon me, and examining the features of my buxome Countenance, she conjectured right, that some good Fellow had got up my belly at London, and I was going into the Country to be lightned of my burthen: she having a while considered with her self, that I might be very useful for her in an affair she had then in hand, was very pleasant with me, desiring my further acquaintance. I was not shye for the matter, but knowing that I had money enough to bear me out in any cross adventure that might happen, was resolved to see what the Old Woman meant by her familiarity. She first gave me Joy of my great Belly; to which I replyed, she might be mistaken; well, well, said she it matters not, whether I am or no; but if it be not so, I wish it were; and methinks it is a pity that you should be sick of any other disease; for I have so much skill in Physiognomy, that I can tell that you are of a more Jovial Temper than now your countenance shews for, and it is very unfit, that one of your years and complexion should want the pleasures of a fit Bed-fellow; but I suppose you are not ignorant of those enjoyments, and have a Husband, with whom you have experienced the sweet of a Married Life. Truly, Madam, said I, you are much mistaken; for I never yet entred into that honourable Estate of Matrimony. Well, that matters not much, replyed this good Old one; but I have miss’d of my aim, if you are ignorant of what I have told you; and although you may have no Husband, yet I believe you have a Friend, who has been dabling with you, and swel’d your Belly; if it be so, you are not the only she that is guilty of that pleasing Crime; for I my self have been good in my time; and still have a Colts tooth in my head.

Thus did the Old Dotterel initiate her acquaintance with me; and had well near put me to the blush, but that I turned my face aside, and gently wip’d it with my Handkerchief; and then I told her she was very pleasant, and that a little in the extreams, considering the publickness of the place (there were more Guests in the Room) and our small acquaintance. As for the place, said she, I must confess, as we are not all one Womans Children, so we ought to be somewhat careful; but I shall make amends for that, by desireing you to withdraw into a more private place; and as for the short time of our acquaintance, I question not, but we shall quickly set our Horses together, and I hope our present meeting may be advantagious to us both, especially, if it be as I yet expect it. What do you mean, said I? That is, replyed she, if you be with Child, and such a Gamester as I wish you. I was much amazed at this Womans confidence; but however, she having been so open with me, I resolved to be as free with her: hoping her words might prove true, and that some benefit might be made out of her acquaintance; and therefore advising her to leave that Room, for another more private, she soon obey’d me; and having entred, and causing a good fire, and Wine to be brought, we sat down together, not without my receiving some salutations, and strict embraces from my Antient, but to me new acquaintance. After we had each of us washed away sorrow with a Cup of the best Canary, the Old Woman being now more bold than before; again took me in her arms, & laid her hand hard upon my Belly; when it so fortuned, that at that very instant the Child gave a gentle turn in my Belly; which she quickly felt; and then cryed out, Well, Daughter, you see I was in the right; therefore since I have discovered somewhat, I pray tell me the rest of your condition; and I question not but you will receive much profit by your discovery: I was resolved to be very free with her, and acquaint her with the chiefest of my Adventures; still concealing so much thereof, as should, or might be convenient to be made known; whereupon I thus began.

Mother (since you will have it so) I shall make a free confession of my Crime; hoping you will be merciful in the pennance you shall impose; seeing, as you say, I am not the alone guilty party; and thereupon I recounted to her, how that I being born in such a Country, and desirous to see fashions, went up to London, and there happened into a Service; where my Masters Brother falling in love with me, after some Courtship (he promising me marriage) we came to enjoyment; that he, notwithstanding his promise married with another; who indeed exceeded me in Fortune, as I her in beauty; but my sweet heart soon after marriage came to me, and repented of his bargain; but since that was past could not be remedied, I was forced to be contented; and indeed, I having a great love for him, permitted him still to lye with me, that in the end, I was with Child by him; and then we consulting what was most necessary to be done, it was at length concluded, that I should leave my service, and retire into the Country, till I were rid of my great Belly; and to that end and purpose, I was now come into the Country, expecting him in short time to follow me. Thus did I give her a short, though somewhat true, account of my Fortunes; and when I had done, she thus replyed.

Well, Daughter, since your condition is as I judged it, and indeed hop’d it to be; I shall play the Chymist, and extract Golden Fortunes to you out of your own desperate misfortunes; for I doubt, as your Lover hath once been false to you, so he may prove the second time; and now he hath sent you a journey, he may leave you to shift for your self; and to look for another Father for your Child. But, Daughter, (continued she) if you will be rul’d by me, you shall not only have a rich Father, but a great fortune for your Child: and perhaps, so much ready money for your self, as you will not only give me thanks, but reckon this our meeting to be the most fortunate Accident of your whole Life. I thank you very kindly, replyed I, for your fair offers, but I shall desire you to explain your self further; and I suppose I shall put so much confidence in you, as to be rul’d by you; although I do not in the least doubt that I shall be put to those extremities you imagine. So much the better, replyed she; but however, that I may fit you for those purposes I have designed, and partly propounded to you; I shall give you an account of some part of my Life and Adventures; and thereupon she thus Began.