CHAPTER V An Unshaken Resolution

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When Catherine ran up the steps of the villa on her return that night, she caught sight of Mrs. Arderne's anxious eyes peeping through a front window at her, and the door was quickly opened by that lady herself.

'My dear girl, I have been worrying about you! How dark it is outside!'

'I am not late for supper, am I?'

'No. I only worried because you were out alone in the darkness.'

'You dear soul! It was very kind of you, but there was nothing at all terrible to be met with in this peaceful English village! The poorer people are all out now, shopping for to-morrow—it is Saturday night, you know. There! I don't believe that a companion ought to call her employer "You dear soul." Why don't you scold me when I forget our new relation to one another?'

Mrs. Arderne patted Catherine's rosy cheek, and taking her arm led her into the sitting-room, where supper was spread for two.

'Because I do not wish you to be a bit different, child, except in the way of having more worldly wisdom in your private affairs. I hoped that your impecunious Uncle Jack would disappoint you, and his ward prove a captious, annoying, spoiled invalid, instead of which he has evidently pleased you so well that even Miss Agatha has not been able to put you out of spirits.'

'Poor little Agatha!—indeed, she too pleased me!'

Mrs. Arderne sighed.

'It is a disappointment to me, I assure you, to see you come back wearing that radiant face!'

'They have been so good to me! And the night air is deliciously cold, and I'm as hungry as a hunter! I must be an expensive companion, for I eat so much, don't I?'

'Not a morsel more than a healthy girl should. Satisfy your appetite, Catherine; then we will sit round the fire while you give me an honest account of your visit to Redan Cottage.'

So, when the servant had cleared away, the two friends began a cosy chat, the younger seated as usual on a low stool, leaning her right arm on the elder's knee.

It was a joy to Catherine, this description of her visit to her Uncle Jack and Agatha, for it enabled her to recall the incidents of an eventful evening, and helped her to understand better both his character and that of his ward. The more she reflected and spoke, the more did she see that she had chosen rightly, and Mrs. Arderne's well-meant regrets only made her own courage and gratitude the stronger.

After some discussion Mrs. Arderne asked, in bewildered tones:

'Is it mere preference for one uncle that has made you choose to sacrifice all your chances, child?'

'No. There are many, many reasons why I could not have chosen otherwise. You would not have had me refuse a kind offer, hurt Uncle Jack's feelings, disappoint Agatha, and deny my own wishes as well, and all for the sake of a possible financial advantage, would you? Uncle Ross did not offer me a home at all; and if he had done so, I don't think I could have accepted it. He would have expected me to share his line of policy towards Uncle Jack. Besides, I should have felt a mercenary wretch. Since I am blessed with health and an opportunity to earn my own living, I ought not to live in idleness and luxury at any relative's expense. And I should be wrong, were I to accept from one uncle the wealth which belongs rightly to his nearest relative—the other uncle.'

'Now I do begin to understand!' cried Mrs. Arderne. 'Your pride influenced you principally in the making of your choice.'

Catherine raised her frank eyes to meet the disapproving gaze of her friend.

'I don't think it was a bad kind of pride,' she answered simply. 'And I was only leading up to my biggest reason of all.'

'Probably that is as absurd as the others, my dear!'

'I hope you won't try to think lightly of it, dear Mrs. Arderne, for it is the best and sincerest part of me. It is—my love for God. Uncle Jack and Agatha are actually in need of help that I can give them, while they in their turn will help me to lead the higher life, which is the only worthy one. We shall encourage one another to serve God better.'

'But you are not going to live at Redan Cottage, thank goodness!'

'No. I shall only spend most of my spare hours there so long as we are in the neighbourhood, and all my holidays will pass there, at home. Then I can write to them very, very often during the times I am away. As a rule people do not make half enough use of the post. It offers a splendid means of communication between friends who are parted.'

'And if you had agreed to live at Carm Hall, you would have been within five miles of these beloved relatives!'

'I should have been dependent upon a man who behaves persistently ill to them. Dear, kind friend, do you not suppose that if Uncle Ross became my benefactor, to the extent of giving me my daily all, he would not try, and be more or less justified in expecting, to make me obedient to his wishes in all important matters? If I let him be as a father to me, shouldn't I owe him consideration? And "consideration" in his opinion would mean giving up constant intercourse with those who have offended him.'

'But, child, child, your Uncle Jack and Agatha can surely become religious without your aid, if they desire to.'

Catherine laughed blithely.

'Why, of course—only I think that I can help them, and that God means me to do so. If a poor man asked you for an alms, and you were sure he was very hungry, you wouldn't refuse to give to him because some one else might be just as well able to do so. I have had experience in regard to the destitution of souls that know not God's peace. There is a spiritual hunger which is worse, far, far worse, both to bear and to witness, than mere bodily starvation!'

An impatient sigh escaped Mrs. Arderne's lips.

'You are an incorrigible zealot, evidently!'

'I hope so.'

'At least you will admit that you could be just as religious yourself at Carm Hall as at Redan Cottage.'

'Oh yes; but Uncle Ross doesn't like people to be religious. He would attack my faith daily with sharp little weapons of perfectly courteous ridicule, and when I repulsed the attack he would be angry at heart with me.'

'You could have borne that for Brian's sake, I should have thought, and you could have told your Uncle Jack to apply for religious instruction to the proper person, namely, the clergyman of the parish.'

'Mr. Burnley, if he is still here, could scarcely be expected to spare time to smooth away all my poor little Agatha's nervous fears and doubts, even supposing she could be persuaded to tell them to him. Dear Mrs. Arderne, do not try to destroy my choice, for it is irrevocably made, and I am very happy in it.'

'It is full of conceit, Catherine! You imagine you have a solemn mission from God to convert your heathen relatives.'

Catherine's face clouded.

'Don't, dear!' she pleaded earnestly. 'Don't try to be bitter or cynical, for those moods are quite unlike you. I may be conceited, I daresay I am, about other matters, but not about my knowledge of the love and mercy of our Saviour. That is a subject upon which I own my ignorance, for every hour that I live I make some new, beautiful, blessed discovery in it! But it is certain that God gives to each one of us some particular duties, some work to be performed to His honour and glory, and I cannot refuse to do that which seems to me both right and necessary. You wouldn't really wish me to choose to serve Mammon instead of God!'

Mrs. Arderne would not own that she was convinced of Catherine's wisdom, though she could not advance another argument against the latter's decision. She contented herself with exclaiming:

'You are a most disappointing young woman, Catherine!'

'As a companion, please, ma'am?' asked the culprit, who was genuinely amused by this description of herself.

'N-no; disappointing to your friends—to me especially, because I had set my heart upon seeing you reinstated in a position suited to you, either by your uncle or by your marriage.'

'My Brian does not please you?'

'You will not please him by this last folly.'

'He isn't a bit mercenary. You will see, he will approve my choice, when he has read the long letter I mean to write him before breakfast to-morrow morning. He will sympathise, too, with my great wish, which is that, with God's help, I may be able to act as peacemaker between my uncles.'

'Good gracious, child, I never contemplated that possibility!'

'Did you not? It will be a difficult task.'

'So I should imagine.'

'But if I could but do it, they would all be so much happier! Dear Uncle Jack frets about the quarrel; he is really attached to his brother. Uncle Ross is terribly lonely in his big house, with no one to love him. Then Agatha could have the care and nursing she needs.'

'And Catherine Carmichael could have——'

'I don't understand you,' said the girl slowly, trying to read Mrs. Arderne's meaning in her face. 'I—should lose Redan Cottage for a home. And—oh, I suppose "home" would be Carm Hall then. How funny!'

'How ridiculously unpractical you are! A veritable baby! This new plan of yours, Miss Peacemaker, is the one way in which you can make up to your friends, your lover, and yourself for the folly of your choice! Reconcile your uncles and go to live with them. Mr. Ross Carmichael will alter his will, and leave his thousands to you instead of to charities.'

There was a very mischievous smile playing round Catherine's lips while she listened to Mrs. Arderne's eagerly explained advice, a smile which increased as she answered, 'I am glad that you approve of me for something, and that our wishes coincide for once! I mean to try my very hardest to bring about that reconciliation; but I shall work for dear Uncle Jack's sake principally, then for Agatha's, lastly for Uncle Ross's. And if I am happy enough to succeed, I shall be so glad and proud that no worldly prospects of my own could possibly make me happier!'

'I can be mercenary-minded for you—that is one comfort, child.'

'It would be nicer if you would not.'

'Nonsense; you surely aren't so mad that you despise wealth and power?'

'No; only I hate to calculate about them, and I don't covet them. God will send me enough daily bread, and that is all that matters.'

'For the sake of Brian——'

'Riches and position are not always blessings, dear Mrs. Arderne. We are told in the Bible, "He that hasteth to be rich hath an evil eye," "He that loveth silver shall not be satisfied with silver," and "How hardly shall they that have riches enter into the kingdom of God!" Neither for Brian nor for myself can I covet a stewardship the duties of which we may not be fitted to perform, which might take from us the best wealth—God's love.'

'Of course I cannot say any more, since you have taken to quoting the Bible, Catherine. My memory for texts was always a bad one.'

'Ted and Toddie shall not be able to say that when they are grown up—not unless they wilfully forget all I teach them, and they love their Scripture lessons too well to do that. Do you know, Toddie told me yesterday that God seems ever so much realer than other kings? Wasn't it sweet of her?'

Mrs. Arderne gave Catherine's brow a quick kiss.

'Naturally I think most of Toddie's speeches sweet. Go on training my babes in the knowledge of the Creator, Catherine, for I—I shouldn't like them to grow up to be worldly like their mother.'

'You only try to be worldly, your heart isn't one bit so.'

'Yes, it is; I love all the pleasures and vanities of life. Now go to bed, Catherine, child, or you will oversleep yourself in the morning, and not be able to write that lengthy letter to Brian North.'

The girl sprang up, and clasped her strong young arms round her friend, crying:

'Good-night, then, you dearest of employers. Tell me once again that you do really want me, and that you will give me notice directly I cease to be of use to you.'

'Have I not told you, just this minute, that I want you for my babies' sakes as well as for my own? If Ted and Nora had not their "dear Carr" to teach them about God, they might question mother, and find out how little her knowledge is on the subject. You have another mission here, Catherine, for the enlightenment of ignorance.'

'And "mother" knows where to seek knowledge, whereas babies do not. Thank you again and again, dear, for making me welcome.'

Mrs. Arderne turned the conversation into a more shallow channel by laughingly reminding her young friend:

'We shall probably get on together famously for the future, because your plan and my plan for you are identical. We are both bent upon the reconciliation of your uncles.'


                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           

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