  (From "The City Man's Vade Mecum") Promoter. Are you a gentleman of blameless reputation? Candidate. Certainly, and I share that reputation with a dozen generations of ancestors. Promoter. And no doubt you are the soul of honour? Candidate. That is my belief—a belief shared by all my friends and acquaintances. Promoter. And I think, before taking up finance, you have devoted a long life to the service of your country? Candidate. That is so. My career has been rewarded by all kinds of honours. Promoter. And there is no particular reason why you should dabble in Stock Exchange matters? Candidate. None that I know of—save, perhaps, to serve a friend. Promoter. Now, be very careful. Do you Candidate. Nothing whatever. I know nothing absolutely about business. Promoter. Then I have much pleasure in informing you that you have been unanimously elected a member of the board of management! [Scene closes in until the public demands further information. where I'll be respected "Perfeck Lidy" (who has just been ejected). "Well, next time I goes into a publickouse, I'll go somewhere where I'll be respected!" RIDDLE FOR THE CITYOh! why, my friend, is a joint stock Concern like, yet unlike, a clock? Because it may be wound up; when, Alas! it doesn't go again. The Seat of Impudence.—A cabman's box. Song of Suburban Householders awaiting the Advent of the Dustman.—"We always use a big, big D!" A Floating Capital Joke.—When may a man be said to be literally immersed in business?—When he's giving a swimming lesson. A Cheerful Investment.—A laughing-stock. Bread's gone up to-day Baker. "I shall want another ha'penny. Bread's gone up to-day." Boy. "Then give us one of yesterday's." |
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