  Dear Mr. Punch,—I perceive that there is a movement on foot, initiated by the patriot Doogan, M.P., for teaching the Irish language to the youthful Redmonds and Healeys of the Emerald Isle. I am sorry that the Government has not acquiesced in the motion. I, myself, would bring in a measure compelling all Hibernian Members of Parliament to denounce (they never speak) in their native tongue. Just fancy the rapture with which they would inveigh in a language incapable of comprehension by a single Sassenach! And what a mighty relief to the other legislators! If necessary, the Speaker might be provided with an Anglo-Irish dictionary, or possibly a new post (open to Nationalists only) might be created, viz., Interpreter for Ireland. Trusting that my suggestion may be supported by you, I am, yours obediently, Lindley Murray Walker The College, Torkington-on-the-Marsh. Usher (the Court having been much annoyed by the shuffling of feet). "Will ye hould yer tongues up there with yer feet in the gallery!" Irish Landlord (to his agent, who has been to London as a witness). "And did ye mix much in society, Murphy?" Mr. Pat Murphy. "Mix is it? Faix I did that, every night of the whole time, and they said they'd niver tasted anything like it!" "Whatever have you been doing with yourself, Murphy? You look all broken up!" "Well, yer 'anner, I wint to wan iv thim 'shtop-the-war' meetings lasht noight!" |
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