  IN IMITATION OF DEAN SWIFT. Logicians have but ill defin’d As rational, the human mind; Reason, they say, belongs to man— But let them prove it, if they can. Wise Aristotle and Smiglecius,35 By ratiocinations specious, Have strove to prove with great precision, With definition and division, Homo est ratione prÆditum— But for my soul I cannot credit ’em: And must in spite of them maintain That man and all his ways are vain, And that this boasted child of nature Is both a weak and erring creature— Than reason—boasting mortals’ pride, And that brute beasts are far before ’em: Deus est anima brutorum. Who ever knew an honest brute At law his neighbour prosecute; Bring action for assault and battery, Or friend beguile with lies and flattery? O’er plains they ramble unconfin’d, No politics disturb their mind; They eat their meals, and take their sport, Nor know who’s in or out at court: They never to the levee go, To treat as dearest friend, a foe; They never importune his Grace; Nor ever cringe to men in place; Nor undertake a dirty job, Nor draw the quill to write for Bob;36 Fraught with invective they ne’er go To folks at Paternoster Row: No jugglers, fiddlers, dancing-masters, No pickpockets, or poetasters, Are known to honest quadrupeds; No single brute his fellow leads. Brutes never meet in bloody fray, Nor cut each others’ throats for pay. Of beasts, it is confess’d, the ape Comes nearest us in human shape: And malice is his ruling passion; But both in malice and grimaces, A courtier any ape surpasses. Behold him, humbly cringing, wait Upon the minister of state; View him soon after to inferiors Aping the conduct of superiors: He promises with equal air, And to perform takes equal care. He in his turn finds imitators: At court, the porters, lackeys, waiters, Their masters’ manners still contract— And footmen, lords and dukes can act. Thus at the court, both great and small Behave alike—for all ape all. FOOTNOTES:35Smiglecius, a native of Poland, wrote a Treatise on Logic, which Goldsmith had probably seen at the University. 36Sir Robert Walpole. |
|
