  FIRST PRIEST. Recitative. Yes, my companions, Heaven's decrees are passed, And our fix'd empire shall for ever last; In vain the madd'ning prophet threatens woe, In vain Rebellion aims her secret blow; Still shall our name and growing power be spread, And still our justice crush the traitor's head. Air. Coeval with man Our empire began, And never shall fall Till ruin shakes all. When ruin shakes all, Then shall Babylon fall. FIRST PROPHET. Recitative. 'Tis thus that Pride triumphant rears the head;— A little while, and all their power is fled. That this way slowly bend along the plain? And now, behold! to yonder bank they bear A pallid corse, and rest the body there. Alas! too well mine eyes indignant trace The last remains of Judah's royal race: Fallen is our king, and all our fears are o'er, Unhappy Zedekiah is no more! Air. Ye wretches, who by fortune's hate In want and sorrow groan, Come, ponder his severer fate, And learn to bless your own. You vain, whom youth and pleasure guide, Awhile the bliss suspend: Like yours, his life began in pride; Like his, your lives shall end. SECOND PROPHET. Behold his wretched corse with sorrow worn, His squalid limbs with ponderous fetters torn; Those eyeless orbs that shock with ghastly glare, Those unbecoming rags, that matted hair! And shall not Heaven for this avenge the foe, Grasp the red bolt, and lay the guilty low? How long, how long, Almighty God of all, Shall wrath vindictive threaten ere it fall? ISRAELITISH WOMAN. Air. As panting flies the hunted hind, Where brooks refreshing stray; And rivers through the valley wind, That stop the hunter's way: Thus we, O Lord, alike distress'd, For streams of mercy long: Those streams which cheer the sore oppress'd, And overwhelm the strong. FIRST PROPHET. Recitative. But whence that shout? Good heavens! amazement all! See yonder tower just nodding to the fall: 'Tis Cyrus here that pours destruction round! The ruin smokes, destruction pours along: How low the great, how feeble are the strong! And now, behold, the battlements recline— O God of hosts, the victory is thine! CHORUS OF CAPTIVES. Down with them, Lord, to lick the dust! Thy vengeance be begun: Serve them as they have served the just, And let thy will be done. FIRST PRIEST. Recitative. All, all is lost. The Syrian army fails; Cyrus, the conqueror of the world, prevails! The ruin smokes, the torrent pours along,— How low the proud, how feeble are the strong! Save us, O Lord! to thee, though late, we pray, And give repentance but an hour's delay. FIRST AND SECOND PRIESTS. Air. O happy, who in happy hour To God their praise bestow, And own his all-consuming power, Before they feel the blow. SECOND PROPHET. Recitative. Now, now's our time! Ye wretches bold and blind, Brave but to God, and cowards to mankind, Ye seek in vain the Lord, unsought before: Your wealth, your pride, your kingdom are no more! Air. O Lucifer, thou son of morn, Alike of Heaven and man the foe,— Heaven, men, and all, Now press thy fall, And sink thee lowest of the low. O Babylon, how art thou fallen! Thy fall more dreadful from delay! Thy streets forlorn To wilds shall turn, Where toads shall pant and vultures prey. SECOND PROPHET. Recitative. Such be her fate! But hark! how from afar The clarion's note proclaims the finish'd war! Our great restorer, Cyrus, is at hand, And this way leads his formidable band. Give, give your songs of Zion to the wind, And hail the benefactor of mankind: He comes, pursuant to divine decree, To chain the strong, and set the captive free. CHORUS OF YOUTHS. Rise to transports past expressing, Sweeter by remember'd woes; Cyrus comes, our wrongs redressing, Comes to give the world repose. CHORUS OF VIRGINS. Cyrus comes, the world redressing, Love and pleasure in his train; Comes to heighten every blessing, Comes to soften every pain. SEMI-CHORUS. Hail to him, with mercy reigning, Skill'd in every peaceful art; Who, from bonds our limbs unchaining, Only binds the willing heart. LAST CHORUS. But chief to Thee, our God, defender, friend, Let praise be given to all eternity; O Thou, without beginning, without end, Let us, and all, begin and end in Thee. A POEM. FIRST PRINTED IN MDCCLXXIV., AFTER THE AUTHOR'S DEATH. Dr. Goldsmith and some of his friends occasionally dined at the St. James's Coffee-house. One day it was proposed to write epitaphs on him. His country, dialect, and person furnished subjects of witticism. He was called on for retaliation, and at their next meeting produced the following poem. Of old, when Scarron his companions invited, Each guest brought his dish, and the feast was united; If our landlord Let each guest bring himself, and he brings the best dish. Our Dean Our Burke Our Will And Dick Our Cumberland's And Douglas Our Garrick's Oil, vinegar, sugar, and saltness agree: To make out the dinner, full certain I am That Hickey's Magnanimous Goldsmith a gooseberry fool. At a dinner so various—at such a repast Who'd not be a glutton, and stick to the last? Here, waiter, more wine! let me sit while I'm able, Till all my companions sink under the table, Then, with chaos and blunders encircling my head, Let me ponder, and tell what I think of the dead. 4. The master of the St. James's Coffee-house, where the poet, and the friends he has characterised in this poem, occasionally dined. 5. Dr. Barnard, Dean of Derry in Ireland. 6. The Right Hon. Edmund Burke. 7. Mr. William Burke, late secretary to General Conway, member for Bedwin, and afterwards holding office in India. 8. Mr. Richard Burke, collector of Granada; afterwards Recorder of Bristol. 9. Richard Cumberland, Esq., author of the "West-Indian," "Fashionable Lover," "The Brothers," "Calvary," &c., &c. 10. Dr. Douglas, Canon of Windsor (afterwards Bishop of Salisbury), an ingenious Scotch gentleman, who has no less distinguished himself as a citizen of the world, than a sound critic, in detecting several literary mistakes (or rather forgeries) of his countrymen; particularly Lauder on Milton, and Bower's "History of the Popes." 11. David Garrick, Esq. 12. Counsellor John Ridge, a gentleman belonging to the Irish Bar. 13. Sir Joshua Reynolds. 14. An eminent attorney. Who mix'd reason with pleasure, and wisdom with mirth: If he had any faults, he has left us in doubt; At least, in six weeks I could not find 'em out; Yet some have declared, and it can't be denied 'em, That Sly-boots was cursedly cunning to hide 'em. Here lies our good Edmund, whose genius was such, We scarcely can praise it or blame it too much; Who, born for the universe, narrow'd his mind, And to party gave up what was meant for mankind. Though fraught with all learning, yet straining his throat To persuade Tommy Townshend Who, too deep for his hearers, still went on refining, And thought of convincing, while they thought of dining: Though equal to all things, for all things unfit, Too nice for a statesman, too proud for a wit; For a patriot, too cool; for a drudge, disobedient; And too fond of the right to pursue the expedient. In short, 'twas his fate, unemploy'd or in place, sir, To eat mutton cold, and cut blocks with a razor. Here lies honest William, whose heart was a mint, While the owner ne'er knew half the good that was in't; The pupil of impulse, it forced him along, His conduct still right, with his argument wrong; Still aiming at honour, yet fearing to roam,— The coachman was tipsy, the chariot drove home: Would you ask for his merits? alas! he had none: What was good was spontaneous, his faults were his own. Here lies honest Richard, whose fate I must sigh at; Alas! that such frolic should now be so quiet! What spirits were his! what wit and what whim! Now breaking a jest, and now breaking a limb! Now wrangling and grumbling, to keep up the ball! Now teasing and vexing, yet laughing at all! In short, so provoking a devil was Dick, That we wish'd him full ten times a day at Old Nick; But missing his mirth and agreeable vein, As often we wish'd to have Dick back again. Here Cumberland lies, having acted his parts, The Terence of England, the mender of hearts; A flattering painter, who made it his care To draw men as they ought to be, not as they are. 15. Mr. Thomas Townshend, member for Whitchurch. 16. Mr. Richard Burke. This gentleman having fractured an arm and a leg at different times, the Doctor has rallied him on these accidents, as a kind of retributive justice for breaking his jests upon other people. Dr. Goldsmith and some of his friends at the His gallants are all faultless, his women divine, And Comedy wonders at being so fine; Like a tragedy queen he has dizen'd her out, Or rather like Tragedy giving a rout. Of virtues and feelings, that Folly grows proud; And coxcombs, alike in their failings alone, Adopting his portraits, are pleased with their own. Say, where has our poet this malady caught, Or wherefore his characters thus without fault? Say was it, that vainly directing his view To find out men's virtues, and finding them few, Quite sick of pursuing each troublesome elf, He grew lazy at last, and drew from himself? Here Douglas retires from his toils to relax, The scourge of impostors, the terror of quacks: Come all ye quack bards, and ye quacking divines, Come, and dance on the spot where your tyrant reclines: When satire and censure encircled his throne, I fear'd for your safety, I fear'd for my own: But now he is gone, and we want a detector, Macpherson Our Townshend make speeches, and I shall compile: New Lauders and Bowers the Tweed shall cross over, No countryman living their tricks to discover; Detection her taper shall quench to a spark, And Scotchman meet Scotchman, and cheat in the dark. Here lies David Garrick, describe him who can,— An abridgment of all that was pleasant in man; As an actor confess'd without rival to shine; As a wit, if not first, in the very first line: Yet, with talents like these, and an excellent heart, The man had his failings,—a dupe to his art. Like an ill-judging beauty, his colours he spread, And beplaster'd with rouge his own natural red. On the stage he was natural, simple, affecting; 'Twas only that when he was off he was acting: With no reason on earth to go out of his way, He turn'd and he varied full ten times a day: Though secure of our hearts, yet confoundedly sick If they were not his own by finessing and trick: He cast off his friends, as a huntsman his pack, For he knew when he pleased he could whistle them back. Of praise a mere glutton, he swallow'd what came, And the puff of a dunce, he mistook it for fame; 17. The Rev. William Dodd. 18. Dr. Kenrick, who read lectures at the Devil Tavern, under the title of "The School of Shakspeare." 19. James Macpherson, Esq., who lately, from the mere force of his style, wrote down the first poet of all antiquity. Who pepper'd the highest was surest to please. But let us be candid, and speak out our mind, If dunces applauded, he paid them in kind. What a commerce was yours, while you got and you gave! How did Grub-street re-echo the shouts that you raised, While he was be-Roscius'd, and you were bepraised! But peace to his spirit, wherever it flies, To act as an angel and mix with the skies: Those poets who owe their best fame to his skill Shall still be his flatterers, go where he will; Old Shakspeare receive him with praise and with love, And Beaumonts and Bens be his Kellys above. Here Hickey reclines, a most blunt pleasant creature, And slander itself must allow him good-nature; He cherish'd his friend, and he relish'd a bumper; Yet one fault he had, and that one was a thumper! Perhaps you may ask if the man was a miser? I answer, No, no, for he always was wiser. Too courteous, perhaps, or obligingly flat? His very worst foe can't accuse him of that. Perhaps he confided in men as they go, And so was too foolishly honest? Ah, no! Then what was his failing? come, tell it, and burn ye! He was—could he help it?—a special attorney. Here Reynolds is laid, and, to tell you my mind, He has not left a wiser or better behind; His pencil was striking, resistless, and grand; His manners were gentle, complying, and bland; Still born to improve us in every part, His pencil our faces, his manners our heart; To coxcombs averse, yet most civilly steering, When they judged without skill, he was still hard of hearing: When they talk'd of their Raphaels, Correggios, and stuff, He shifted his trumpet, 20. Mr. Hugh Kelly, author of "False Delicacy," "Word to the Wise," "Clementina," "School for Wives," &c., &c. 21. Mr. William Woodfall, printer of the "Morning Chronicle." 22. Sir Joshua Reynolds was so remarkably deaf, as to be under the necessity of using an ear-trumpet in company. (After the fourth edition of this poem was printed, the publisher received the following epitaph on Mr. Whitefoord, Here Whitefoord reclines, and deny it who can, Though he merrily lived, he is now a grave Rare compound of oddity, frolic, and fun; Who relish'd a joke, and rejoiced in a pun; Whose temper was generous, open, sincere; A stranger to flatt'ry, a stranger to fear; Who scatter'd around wit and humour at will; Whose daily bons mots half a column might fill: A Scotchman, from pride and from prejudice free; A scholar, yet surely no pedant was he. What pity, alas! that so lib'ral a mind Should so long be to newspaper essays confined! Who perhaps to the summit of science could soar, Yet content "if the table he set in a roar;" Whose talents to fill any station were fit, Yet happy if Woodfall Ye newspaper witlings! ye pert scribbling folks! Who copied his squibs and re-echoed his jokes; Ye tame imitators, ye servile herd, come, Still follow your master, and visit his tomb: To deck it, bring with you festoons of the vine, And copious libations bestow on his shrine; Then strew all around it (you can do no less) Cross-readings, Ship-news, and Mistakes of the Press. Merry Whitefoord That a Scot may have humour: I had almost said wit— This debt to thy mem'ry I cannot refuse, "Thou best-humour'd man with the worst-humour'd Muse." 23. Mr. Caleb Whitefoord, author of many humorous essays. 24. Mr. Whitefoord was so notorious a punster, that Dr. Goldsmith used to say it was impossible to keep his company without being infected with the itch of punning. 25. Mr. H. S. Woodfall, printer of the "Public Advertiser." 26. Mr. Whitefoord had frequently indulged the town with humorous pieces, under those titles, in the "Public Advertiser." A seated woman SONG. "AH ME! WHEN SHALL I MARRY ME?" INTENDED TO HAVE BEEN SUNG IN THE COMEDY OF "SHE STOOPS TO CONQUER." Ah me! when shall I marry me? Lovers are plenty, but fail to relieve me. He, fond youth, that could carry me, Offers to love, but means to deceive me. But I will rally, and combat the ruiner: Not a look, nor a smile shall my passion discover. She that gives all to the false one pursuing her, Makes but a penitent, and loses a lover. THE HERMIT.A BALLAD. "Turn, gentle hermit of the dale, And guide my lonely way To where yon taper cheers the vale With hospitable ray. "For here forlorn and lost I tread, With fainting steps and slow; Where wilds immeasurably spread, Seem lengthening as I go." "Forbear, my son," the hermit cries, "To tempt the dangerous gloom; For yonder faithless phantom flies To lure thee to thy doom. "Here to the houseless child of want My door is open still; And though my portion is but scant I give it with good will. "Then turn to-night, and freely share Whate'er my cell bestows: My rushy couch and frugal fare, My blessing, and repose. "No flocks that range the valley free To slaughter I condemn; Taught by that Power that pities me, I learn to pity them. "But from the mountain's grassy side A guiltless feast I bring; A scrip with herbs and fruits supplied, And water from the spring. "Then, pilgrim, turn, thy cares forego; All earth-born cares are wrong; Man wants but little here below, Nor wants that little long." His gentle accents fell: The modest stranger lowly bends, And follows to the cell. Far in a wilderness obscure The lonely mansion lay; A refuge to the neighbouring poor, And strangers led astray. No stores beneath its humble thatch Required a master's care; The wicket, opening with a latch, Received the harmless pair. And now, when busy crowds retire To take their evening rest, The hermit trimmed his little fire And cheered his pensive guest; And spread his vegetable store, And gaily pressed, and smiled; And skilled in legendary lore The lingering hours beguiled. Around, in sympathetic mirth, Its tricks the kitten tries; The cricket chirrups in the hearth, The crackling faggot flies. But nothing could a charm impart To soothe the strangers woe; For grief was heavy at his heart, And tears began to flow. His rising cares the hermit spied, With answering care opprest: "And whence, unhappy youth," he cried, "The sorrows of thy breast? "From better habitations spurned, Reluctant dost thou rove? Or grieve for friendship unreturned, Or unregarded love? "Alas! the joys that fortune brings Are trifling and decay; And those who prize the paltry things, More trifling still than they. A charm that lulls to sleep, A shade that follows wealth or fame, But leaves the wretch to weep? "And love is still an emptier sound, The modern fair one's jest; On earth unseen, or only found To warm the turtle's nest. "For shame, fond youth, thy sorrows hush, And spurn the sex," he said: But while he spoke, a rising blush His love-lorn guest betrayed. Surprised he sees new beauties rise, Swift mantling to the view; Like colours o'er the morning skies, As bright, as transient too. The bashful look, the rising breast, Alternate spread alarms: The lovely stranger stands confest A maid in all her charms! And "Ah, forgive a stranger rude, A wretch forlorn," she cried; "Whose feet unhallowed thus intrude Where heaven and you reside. "But let a maid thy pity share, Whom love has taught to stray; Who seeks for rest, but finds despair Companion of her way. "My father lived beside the Tyne, A wealthy lord was he: And all his wealth was marked as mine; He had but only me. "To win me from his tender arms, Unnumbered suitors came, Who praised me for imputed charms, And felt or feigned a flame. "Each hour a mercenary crowd With richest proffers strove; Among the rest young Edwin bowed, But never talked of love." "Turn gentle hermit."—p. 226. "In humble, simplest habit clad, No wealth nor power had he; Wisdom and worth were all he had, But these were all to me. "The blossom opening to the day, The dews of heaven refined, Could nought of purity display To emulate his mind. "The dew, the blossom on the tree, With charms inconstant shine; Their charms were his, but, woe is me! Their constancy was mine! Importunate and vain; And while his passion touched my heart, I triumphed in his pain. "Till quite dejected with my scorn, He left me to my pride; And sought a solitude forlorn, In secret where he died. "But mine the sorrow, mine the fault, And well my life shall pay; I'll seek the solitude he sought, And stretch me where he lay. "And there forlorn, despairing, hid, I'll lay me down and die; 'Twas so for me that Edwin did, And so for him will I."— "Forbid it, Heaven!" the hermit cried, And clasped her to his breast: The wond'ring fair one turned to chide,— 'Twas Edwin's self that prest! "Turn, Angelina, ever dear, My charmer, turn to see Thy own, thy long-lost Edwin here, Restored to love and thee! "Thus let me hold thee to my heart, And every care resign: And shall we never, never part, My life—my all that's mine? "No, never from this hour to part, We'll live and love so true; The sigh that rends thy constant heart Shall break thy Edwin's too." A TALE. Secluded from domestic strife, Jack Bookworm led a college life; A fellowship at twenty-five Made him the happiest man alive: He drank his glass and crack'd his joke, And freshmen wonder'd as he spoke. Such pleasures, unalloy'd with care, Could any accident impair? Could Cupid's shaft at length transfix Our swain, arrived at thirty-six? Oh, had the Archer ne'er come down To ravage in a country town! Or Flavia been content to stop At triumphs in a Fleet-street shop! Oh, had her eyes forgot to blaze! Or Jack had wanted eyes to gaze! Oh!——But let exclamations cease: Her presence banish'd all his peace. So with decorum all things carried, Miss frown'd, and blush'd, and then—was married. Need we expose to vulgar sight The raptures of the bridal night? Need we intrude on hallow'd ground, Or draw the curtains closed around? Let it suffice that each had charms; He clasp'd a goddess in his arms; And though she felt his usage rough, Yet in a man 'twas well enough. The honey-moon like lightning flew; The second brought its transports too; A third, a fourth, were not amiss; The fifth was friendship mix'd with bliss: But, when a twelvemonth pass'd away, Jack found his goddess made of clay; Found half the charms that deck'd her face Arose from powder, shreds, or lace; But still the worst remain'd behind,— That very face had robb'd her mind. But dressing, patching, repartee; And, just as humour rose or fell, By turns a slattern or a belle. 'Tis true she dress'd with modern grace,— Half-naked at a ball or race; But when at home, at board or bed, Five greasy nightcaps wrapp'd her head. Could so much beauty condescend To be a dull domestic friend? Could any curtain lectures bring To decency so fine a thing? In short, by night, 'twas fits or fretting; By day, 'twas gadding or coquetting. Fond to be seen, she kept a bevy Of powder'd coxcombs at her levy; The squire and captain took their stations, And twenty other near relations: Jack suck'd his pipe, and often broke A sigh in suffocating smoke; While all their hours were pass'd between Insulting repartee and spleen. Thus, as her faults each day were known, He thinks her features coarser grown; He fancies every vice she shows Or thins her lip, or points her nose: Whenever rage or envy rise, How wide her mouth, how wild her eyes! He knows not how, but so it is, Her face is grown a knowing phiz; And, though her fops are wondrous civil, He thinks her ugly as the devil. Now, to perplex the ravell'd noose, As each a different way pursues, While sullen or loquacious strife Promised to hold them on for life, That dire disease, whose ruthless power Withers the beauty's transient flower,— Lo! the small-pox, with horrid glare, Levell'd its terrors at the fair; And, rifling every youthful grace, Left but the remnant of a face. The glass, grown hateful to her sight, Reflected now a perfect fright; Each former art she vainly tries To bring back lustre to her eyes; To smooth her skin, or hide its seams; Her country beaux and city cousins, Lovers no more, flew off by dozens; And ev'n the captain quit the field. "By turns a slattern or a belle."—p. 232. Poor madam, now condemn'd to hack The rest of life with anxious Jack, Perceiving others fairly flown, Attempted pleasing him alone. Jack soon was dazzled to behold Her present face surpass the old: With modesty her cheeks are dyed; Humility displaces pride; For tawdry finery is seen A person ever neatly clean; No more presuming on her sway, She learns good-nature every day; Serenely gay, and strict in duty, Jack finds his wife a perfect beauty. THE GIFT. TO IRIS, IN BOW STREET, COVENT GARDEN. IMITATED FROM THE FRENCH. Say, cruel Iris, pretty rake, Dear mercenary beauty, What annual offering shall I make Expressive of my duty? My heart, a victim to thine eyes, Should I at once deliver, Say, would the angry fair one prize The gift, who slights the giver? A bill, a jewel, watch, or toy, My rivals give—and let 'em; If gems or gold impart a joy, I'll give them—when I get 'em. I'll give—but not the full-blown rose, Or rose-bud more in fashion: Such short-lived off'rings but disclose A transitory passion. I'll give thee something yet unpaid, Not less sincere than civil,— I'll give thee—ah! too charming maid!— I'll give thee—to the Devil. SACRED TO THE MEMORY OF HER ROYAL HIGHNESS THE PRINCESS DOWAGER OF WALES. ADVERTISEMENT. (The following may more properly be termed a compilation than a poem. It was prepared for the composer in little more than two days; and may therefore rather be considered as an industrious effort of gratitude than of genius. In justice to the composer it may likewise be right to inform the public that the music was composed in a period of time equally short.) OVERTURE.—A solemn Dirge. Air.—Trio. Arise, ye sons of worth, arise, And waken every note of woe! When truth and virtue reach the skies, 'Tis ours to weep the want below. CHORUS. When truth and virtue, &c. MAN SPEAKER. The praise attending pomp and power, The incense given to Kings, Are but the trappings of an hour— Mere transitory things: The base bestow them; but the good agree To spurn the venal gifts as flattery. But when to pomp and power are join'd An equal dignity of mind; When titles are the smallest claim; When wealth, and rank, and noble blood, But aid the power of doing good; Then all their trophies last—and flattery turns to fame. Shall spread and flourish from the tomb; How hast thou left mankind for Heaven! E'en now reproach and faction mourn, And, wondering how their rage was born, Request to be forgiven! Alas! they never had thy hate; Unmoved, in conscious rectitude, Thy towering mind self-centred stood, Nor wanted man's opinion to be great. In vain, to charm thy ravish'd sight, A thousand gifts would fortune send; In vain, to drive thee from the right, A thousand sorrows urged thy end: Like some well-fashion'd arch thy patience stood, And purchased strength from its increasing load. Pain met thee like a friend to set thee free, Affliction still is virtue's opportunity! SONG.—BY A MAN. Virtue, on herself relying, Every passion hush'd to rest, Loses every pain of dying, In the hopes of being blest. Every added pang she suffers, Some increasing good bestows. And every shock that malice offers, Only rocks her to repose. WOMAN SPEAKER. Yet, ah! what terrors frown'd upon her fate— Death, with its formidable band, Fever, and pain, and pale consumptive care, Determined took their stand. Nor did the cruel ravagers design To finish all their efforts at a blow; But, mischievously slow, They robb'd the relic and defaced the shrine. With unavailing grief, Despairing of relief, Her weeping children round Beheld each hour Death's growing power, And trembled as he frown'd. As helpless friends who view from shore The labouring ship, and hear the tempest roar, "As helpless friends who view from shore While winds and waves their wishes cross,— They stood, while hope and comfort fail, Not to assist, but to bewail The inevitable loss. How do the good, the virtuous fall! Truth, beauty, worth, and all that most engage, But wake thy vengeance and provoke thy rage. SONG.—BY A MAN. When vice my dart and scythe supply, How great a king of terrors I! If folly, fraud, your hearts engage, Tremble, ye mortals, at my rage! Fall, round me fall, ye little things, Ye statesmen, warriors, poets, kings! If virtue fail her counsel sage, Tremble, ye mortals, at my rage! MAN SPEAKER. Yet let that wisdom, urged by her example, Teach us to estimate what all must suffer; Let us prize death as the best gift of nature, As a safe inn, where weary travellers, When they have journey'd through a world of cares, May put off life and be at rest for ever. Groans, weeping friends, indeed, and gloomy sables, May oft distract us with their sad solemnity: The preparation is the executioner. Death, when unmask'd, shows me a friendly face, And is a terror only at a distance; For as the line of life conducts me on To Death's great court, the prospect seems more fair. 'Tis Nature's kind retreat, that's always open To take us in when we have drain'd the cup Of life, or worn our days to wretchedness. In that secure, serene retreat, Where, all the humble, all the great, Promiscuously recline; Where, wildly huddled to the eye, The beggar's pouch and prince's purple lie, May every bliss be thine. And, ah! blest spirit, wheresoe'er thy flight, Through rolling worlds, or fields of liquid light, May cherubs welcome their expected guest, May saints with songs receive thee to their rest; May peace, that claim'd while here thy warmest love, May blissful, endless peace be thine above! Lovely, lasting Peace, below, Comforter of ev'ry woe, Heav'nly born, and bred on high, To crown the favourites of the sky; Lovely, lasting Peace, appear; This world itself, if thou art here, Is once again with Eden blest, And man contains it in his breast. WOMAN SPEAKER. Our vows are heard! long, long to mortal eyes, Her soul was fitting to its kindred skies; Celestial-like her bounty fell, Where modest want and silent sorrow dwell: Want pass'd for merit at her door, Unseen the modest were supplied, Her constant pity fed the poor,— Then only poor, indeed, the day she died. And, oh! for this, while sculpture decks thy shrine, And art exhausts profusion round, The tribute of a tear be mine, A simple song, a sigh profound. There Faith shall come a pilgrim grey, To bless the tomb that wraps thy clay; And calm Religion shall repair, To dwell a weeping hermit there. Truth, Fortitude, and Friendship shall agree To blend their virtues while they think of thee. Air.—Chorus. Let us—let all the world agree, To profit by resembling thee. PART II. OVERTURE.—Pastorale. MAN SPEAKER. Fast by that shore where Thames' translucent stream Reflects new glories on his breast, He forms a scene beyond Elysium blest; Where sculptured elegance and native grace Unite to stamp the beauties of the place; While, sweetly blending, still are seen, The wavy lawn, the sloping green; While novelty, with cautious cunning, Through every maze of fancy running, From China borrows aid to deck the scene:— There, sorrowing by the rivers glassy bed, Forlorn a rural band complain'd, All whom Augusta's bounty fed, All whom her clemency sustain'd. The good old sire, unconscious of decay, The modest matron, clad in homespun grey, The military boy, the orphan'd maid, The shatter'd veteran, now first dismay'd,— These sadly join beside the murmuring deep, And as they view the towers of Kew, Call on their mistress, now no more, and weep. CHORUS. Ye shady walks, ye waving greens, Ye nodding towers, ye fairy scenes, Let all your echoes now deplore, That she who form'd your beauties is no more. MAN SPEAKER. First of the train the patient rustic came, Whose callous hand had form'd the scene, Bending at once with sorrow and with age, With many a tear, and many a sigh between: "And where," he cried, "shall now my babes have bread, Or how shall age support its feeble fire? No lord will take me now, my vigour fled, Nor can my strength perform what they require; Each grudging master keeps the labourer bare, A sleek and idle race is all their care. My noble mistress thought not so: Her bounty, like the morning dew, Unseen, though constant, used to flow, And, as my strength decay'd, her bounty grew." "In decent dress, and coarsely clean, WOMAN SPEAKER. In decent dress, and coarsely clean, The pious matron next was seen, Clasp'd in her hand a godly book was borne, By use and daily meditation worn; That decent dress, this holy guide, Augusta's care had well supplied. "And, ah!" she cries, all woe-begone, "What now remains for me? Oh! where shall weeping want repair To ask for charity! Too late in life for me to ask, And shame prevents the deed, To succour, should I need. But all my wants, before I spoke, Were to my Mistress known; She still relieved, nor sought my praise, Contented with her own. But every day her name I'll bless, My morning prayer, my evening song; I'll praise her while my life shall last, A life that cannot last me long." SONG.—BY A WOMAN. Each day, each hour, her name I'll bless, My morning and my evening song, And when in death my vows shall cease, My children shall the note prolong. MAN SPEAKER. The hardy veteran after struck the sight, Scarr'd, mangled, maim'd in every part, Lopp'd of his limbs in many a gallant fight, In nought entire—except his heart; Mute for awhile, and sullenly distress'd, At last the impetuous sorrow fired his breast:— "Wild is the whirlwind rolling O'er Afric's sandy plain, And wild the tempest howling Along the billow'd main; But every danger felt before The raging deep, the whirlwind's roar, Less dreadful struck me with dismay Than what I feel this fatal day. Oh, let me fly a land that spurns the brave, Oswego's dreary shores shall be my grave; I'll seek that less inhospitable coast, And lay my body where my limbs were lost." SONG.—BY A MAN. Old Edward's sons, unknown to yield, Shall crowd from Cressy's laurell'd field, To do thy memory right; For thine and Britain's wrongs they feel, Again they snatch the gleamy steel, And wish the avenging fight. In innocence and youth complaining, Next appear'd a lovely maid; Affliction, o'er each feature reigning, Kindly came in beauty's aid; Every grace that grief dispenses, Every glance that warms the soul, In sweet succession charms the senses, While pity harmonized the whole. "The garland of beauty," 'tis thus she would say, "No more shall my crook or my temples adorn: I'll not wear a garland—Augusta's away, I'll not wear a garland until she return; But, alas! that return I never shall see: The echoes of Thames shall my sorrows proclaim, There promised a lover to come—but, ah me! 'Twas Death—'twas the death of my mistress that came. But ever, for ever, her image shall last, I'll strip all the spring of its earliest bloom; On her grave shall the cowslip and primrose be cast, And the new blossom'd thorn shall whiten her tomb." SONG—BY A WOMAN. Pastorale. With garlands of beauty the Queen of the May No more will her crook or her temples adorn; For who'd wear a garland when she is away, When she is removed and shall never return? On the grave of Augusta these garlands be placed, We'll rifle the spring of its earliest bloom, And there shall the cowslip and primrose be cast, And the new blossom'd thorn shall whiten her tomb. CHORUS. On the grave of Augusta this garland be placed, We'll rifle the spring of its earliest bloom, And there shall the cowslip and primrose be cast, The tears of her country shall water her tomb. IN IMITATION OF DEAN SWIFT. Logicians have but ill defined As rational the human mind: Reason, they say, belongs to man; But let them prove it if they can. Wise Aristotle and Smiglesius, By ratiocinations specious, Have strove to prove with great precision, With definition and division, Homo est ratione prÆditum; But for my soul I cannot credit 'em; And must in spite of them maintain That man and all his ways are vain; And that this boasted lord of nature Is both a weak and erring creature; That instinct is a surer guide Than reason, boasting mortals' pride; And that brute beasts are far before 'em— Deus est anima brutorum. Who ever knew an honest brute At law his neighbour prosecute? Bring action for assault and battery? Or friends beguile with lies and flattery? O'er plains they ramble unconfined; No politics disturb their mind; They eat their meals and take their sport, Nor know who's in or out at court: They never to the levee go To treat as dearest friend a foe; They never importune his Grace, Nor ever cringe to men in place; Nor undertake a dirty job; Nor draw the quill to write for Bob; Fraught with invective they ne'er go To folks at Paternoster Row: No judges, fiddlers, dancing-masters, No pickpockets or poetasters, 27. Sir Robert Walpole. "Brutes never meet in bloody fray, Are known to honest quadrupeds: No single brute his fellow leads. Brutes never meet in bloody fray, Nor cut each other's throats for pay. Comes nearest us in human shape: Like man, he imitates each fashion, And malice is his ruling passion: But both in malice and grimaces A courtier any ape surpasses. Behold him humbly cringing wait Upon the minister of state; View him soon after to inferiors Aping the conduct of superiors: He promises with equal air, And to perform takes equal care. He in his turn finds imitators; At court, the porters, lacqueys, waiters, Their master's manners still contract, And footmen lords and dukes can act. Thus at the court, both great and small Behave alike, for all ape all. DESCRIPTION OF AN AUTHOR'S BED-CHAMBER. Where the Red Lion, staring o'er the way, Invites each passing stranger that can pay; Where Calvert's butt, and Parsons' black champagne, Regale the drabs and bloods of Drury Lane; There in a lonely room, from bailiffs snug, The Muse found Scroggen stretch'd beneath a rug. A window, patched with paper, lent a ray That dimly show'd the state in which he lay: The sanded floor that grits beneath the tread; The humid wall with paltry pictures spread; The royal Game of Goose was there in view, And the Twelve Rules the royal martyr drew; The Seasons, framed with listing, found a place; And brave Prince William show'd his lamp-black face. The morn was cold; he views with keen desire The rusty grate unconscious of a fire: With beer and milk arrears the frieze was scored, And five crack'd tea-cups dress'd the chimney-board; A night-cap deck'd his brows instead of bay, A cap by night—a stocking all the day! INTENDED FOR MRS. BULKLEY. There is a place—so Ariosto sings— A treasury for lost and missing things; Lost human wits have places there assign'd them, And they who lose their senses, there may find them. But where's this place, this storehouse of the age? The Moon, says he;—but I affirm, the Stage— At least, in many things, I think I see His lunar and our mimic world agree: Both shine at night, for, but at Foote's alone, We scarce exhibit till the sun goes down; Both prone to change, no settled limits fix, And sure the folks of both are lunatics. But in this parallel my best pretence is, That mortals visit both to find their senses: To this strange spot, rakes, macaronies, cits, Come thronging to collect their scatter'd wits. The gay coquette, who ogles all the day, Comes here at night, and goes a prude away. Hither the affected city dame advancing, Who sighs for operas, and doats on dancing, Taught by our art, her ridicule to pause on, Quits the ballet, and calls for Nancy Dawson. The gamester, too, whose wit's all high or low, Oft risks his fortune on one desperate throw, Comes here to saunter, having made his bets, Finds his lost senses out, and pays his debts. The Mohawk, too, with angry phrases stor'd— As "Dam'me, Sir!" and, "Sir, I wear a sword!" Here lesson'd for awhile, and hence retreating, Goes out, affronts his man, and takes a beating. Here come the sons of scandal and of news, But find no sense—for they had none to lose. Of all the tribe here wanting an adviser, Our Author's the least likely to grow wiser; Has he not seen how you your favour place On sentimental queens and lords in lace? Without a star, a coronet, or garter, How can the piece expect or hope for quarter? No high-life scenes, no sentiment:—the creature Still stoops among the low to copy nature. Yes, he's far gone:—and yet some pity fix, The English laws forbid to punish lunatics. A TRAGEDY; WRITTEN BY JOSEPH CRADDOCK, ESQ. SPOKEN BY MR. QUICK, IN THE CHARACTER OF A SAILOR. In these bold times, when Learning's sons explore The distant climate, and the savage shore; When wise astronomers to India steer, And quit for Venus many a brighter here; While botanists, all cold to smiles and dimpling, Forsake the fair, and patiently—go simpling; Our bard into the general spirit enters, And fits his little frigate for adventures. With Scythian stores, and trinkets deeply laden, He this way steers his course, in hopes of trading; Yet ere he lands he's order'd me before, To make an observation on the shore. Where are we driven? our reckoning sure is lost This seems a rocky and a dangerous coast. Lord, what a sultry climate am I under! Yon ill-foreboding cloud seems big with thunder: Upper Gallery. There mangroves spread, and larger than I've seen 'em— [Pit. Here trees of stately size—and billing turtles in 'em— [Balconies. Here ill-conditioned oranges abound— [Stage. And apples, bitter apples, strew the ground. [Tasting them. The inhabitants are cannibals, I fear: I heard a hissing—there are serpents here! O, there the people are—best keep my distance; Our Captain, gentle natives! craves assistance; Our ship's well-stored;—in yonder creek we've laid her, His Honour is no mercenary trader. This is his first adventure; lend him aid, And we may chance to drive a thriving trade. His goods, he hopes, are prime, and brought from far, Equally fit for gallantry and war. What! no reply to promises so ample? I'd best step back—and order up a sample. Victorian London Street view. ELEGY. ON THE DEATH OF A MAD DOG. Good people all, of every sort, Give ear unto my song, It cannot hold you long. In Islington there was a man Of whom the world might say, That still a godly race he ran— Whene'er he went to pray. A kind and gentle heart he had To comfort friends and foes; The naked every day he clad— When he put on his clothes. And in that town a dog was found, As many dogs there be, Both mongrel, puppy, whelp, and hound, And curs of low degree. This dog and man at first were friends; But when a pique began, The dog, to gain some private ends, Went mad, and bit the man! Around from all the neighbouring streets The wondering neighbours ran, And swore the dog had lost his wits, To bite so good a man. The wound it seem'd both sore and sad To every Christian eye; And while they swore the dog was mad, They swore the man would die. But soon a wonder came to light, That show'd the rogues they lied: The man recover'd of the bite— The dog it was that died. EPILOGUE. TO THE COMEDY OF "THE SISTERS." What? five long acts—and all to make us wiser! Our authoress sure has wanted an adviser. Her moral play a speaking masquerade; Warm'd up each bustling scene, and in her rage Have emptied all the green-room on the stage. My life on't, this had kept her play from sinking, Have pleased our eyes, and saved the pain of thinking. Well! since she thus has shown her want of skill, What if I give a masquerade?—I will. But how? ay, there's the rub! pausing I've got my cue: The world's a masquerade! the masquers, you, you, you. To Boxes, Bit, and Gallery. Lud! what a group the motley scene discloses! False wits, false wives, false virgins, and false spouses! Statesmen with bridles on; and, close beside 'em, Patriots in party-colour'd suits that ride 'em: There Hebes, turn'd of fifty, try once more To raise a flame in Cupids of threescore; These in their turn, with appetites as keen, Deserting fifty, fasten on fifteen. Miss, not yet full fifteen, with fire uncommon, Flings down her sampler, and takes up the woman; The little urchin smiles, and spreads her lure, And tries to kill, ere she's got power to cure. Thus 'tis with all—their chief and constant care Is to seem every thing—but what they are. Yon broad, bold, angry spark, I fix my eye on, Who seems t'have robb'd his vizor from the lion; Who frowns and talks and swears, with round parade, Looking, as who should say, dam' me! who's afraid? Mimicking. Strip but this vizor off, and, sure I am, You'll find his lionship a very lamb. Yon politician, famous in debate, Perhaps, to vulgar eyes, bestrides the state; Yet, when he deigns his real shape t'assume, He turns old woman, and bestrides a broom. Yon patriot, too, who presses on your sight, And seems, to every gazer, all in white, If with a bribe his candour you attack, He bows, turns round, and whip—the man's in black! Yon critic, too—but whither do I run? If I proceed, our bard will be undone! Well, then, a truce, since she requests it too: Do you spare her, and I'll for once spare you. WRITTEN AND SPOKEN BY THE POET LABERIUS, A ROMAN KNIGHT WHOM CÆSAR FORCED UPON THE STAGE. PRESERVED BY MACROBIUS. What! no way left to shun th'inglorious stage, And save from infamy my sinking age! Scarce half alive, oppress'd with many a year, What in the name of dotage drives me here? A time there was, when glory was my guide, Nor force nor fraud could turn my steps aside; Unawed by power, and unappall'd by fear, With honest thrift I held my honour dear: But this vile hour disperses all my store, And all my hoard of honour is no more; For, ah! too partial to my life's decline, CÆsar persuades, submission must be mine; Him I obey, whom Heaven itself obeys, Hopeless of pleasing, yet inclined to please. Here then at once I welcome every shame, And cancel at threescore a life of fame: No more my titles shall my children tell; The old buffoon will fit my name as well: This day beyond its term my fate extends, For life is ended when our honour ends. STANZAS. ON THE TAKING OF QUEBEC, AND DEATH OF GENERAL WOLFE. Amidst the clamour of exulting joys, Which triumph forces from the patriot heart, Grief dares to mingle her soul-piercing voice, And quells the raptures which from pleasure start. O Wolfe! to thee a streaming flood of woe, Sighing we pay, and think e'en conquest dear: Quebec in vain shall teach our breast to glow, Whilst thy sad fate extorts the heart-wrung tear. Alive, the foe thy dreadful vigour fled, And saw thee fall with joy-pronouncing eyes; Yet they shall know thou conquerest, though dead! Since from thy tomb a thousand heroes rise. Man Sitting at a table writing. A NEW SIMILE. IN THE MANNER OF SWIFT. Long had I sought in vain to find A likeness for the scribbling kind— The modern scribbling kind, who write In wit, and sense, and nature's spite— Till reading—I forget what day on, A chapter out of Tooke's "Pantheon," I think I met with something there To suit my purpose to a hair. First please to turn to god Mercurius: You'll find him pictur'd at full length In book the second, page the tenth: The stress of all my proofs on him I lay; And now proceed we to our simile. Imprimis, pray observe his hat: Wings upon either side—mark that. Well! what is it from thence we gather? Why, these denote a brain of feather. A brain of feather? very right, With wit that's flighty, learning light; Such as to modern bard's decreed: A just comparison—proceed. In the next place, his feet peruse: Wings grow again from both his shoes; Design'd, no doubt, their part to bear, And waft his godship through the air: And here my simile unites; For in a modern poet's flights, I'm sure it may be justly said, His feet are useful as his head. Lastly, vouchsafe t'observe his hand, Fill'd with a snake-encircled wand, By classic authors termed Caduceus, And highly famed for several uses: To wit,—most wond'rously endued, No poppy-water half so good; For let folks only get a touch, Its soporific virtue's such, Though ne'er so much awake before, That quickly they begin to snore; Add, too, what certain writers tell, With this he drives men's souls to hell. Now to apply, begin we then:— His wand's a modern author's pen; The serpents round about it twined Denote him of the reptile kind, Denote the rage with which he writes, His frothy slaver, venom'd bites: An equal semblance still to keep, Alike, too, both conduce to sleep; This difference only,—as the god Drove souls to Tart'rus with his rod, With his goose-quill the scribbling elf, Instead of others, damns himself. Yet grant a word by way of postscript. Moreover Merc'ry had a failing; Well! what of that? out with it.—Stealing; In which all modern bards agree, Being each as great a thief as he. But even this deity's existence Shall lend my simile assistance: Our modern bards! why, what a pox Are they—but senseless stones and blocks? EPITAPH ON DR. PARNELL. SPOKEN BY MR. LEE LEWIS, IN THE CHARACTER OF HARLEQUIN, AT HIS BENEFIT. Hold! Prompter, hold! a word before your nonsense: I'd speak a word or two, to ease my conscience. My heels eclipsed the honours of my head; That I found humour in a piebald vest, Or ever thought that jumping was a jest. [Takes off his mask. Whence, and what art thou, visionary birth? Nature disowns, and reason scorns, thy mirth; In thy black aspect every passion sleeps, The joy that dimples, and the woe that weeps. How hast thou fill'd the scene with all thy brood Of fools pursuing, and of fools pursued! Whose ins and outs no ray of sense discloses, Whose only plot it is to break our noses; Whilst from below the trap-door demons rise, And from above the dangling deities. And shall I mix in this unhallow'd crew? May rosin'd lightning blast me if I do! No—I will act—I'll vindicate the stage: Shakespeare himself shall feel my tragic rage. Off! off! vile trappings! a new passion reigns: The madd'ning monarch revels in my veins. Oh! for a Richard's voice to catch the theme,— "Give me another horse! bind up my wounds!—soft—'twas but a dream." Ay, 'twas but a dream, for now there's no retreating, If I cease Harlequin, I cease from eating. 'Twas thus that Æsop's stag, a creature blameless, Yet something vain, like one that shall be nameless, Once on the margin of a fountain stood, And cavill'd at his image in the flood. "The deuce confound," he cries, "these drumstick shanks, They never have my gratitude nor thanks; They're perfectly disgraceful! strike me dead; But for a head, yes, yes, I have a head: How piercing is that eye! how sleek that brow! My horns!—I'm told horns are the fashion now." Whilst thus he spoke, astonish'd, to his view, Near, and more near, the hounds and huntsmen drew; Hoicks! hark forward! came thundering from behind, He bounds aloft, outstrips the fleeting wind: He quits the woods, and tries the beaten ways; He starts, he pants, he takes the circling maze: At length, his silly head, so prized before, Is taught his former folly to deplore; Whilst his strong limbs conspire to set him free, And at one bound he saves himself—like me. [Taking a jump through the stage door. Interior scene of a haberdashery. AN ELEGYON THE GLORY OF HER SEX, MRS. MARY BLAIZE. Good people all, with one accord, Lament for Madam Blaize, From those who spoke her praise. The needy seldom pass'd her door, And always found her kind; She freely lent to all the poor— Who left a pledge behind. She strove the neighbourhood to please With manners wond'rous winning; And never follow'd wicked ways— Unless when she was sinning. At church, in silks and satins new, With hoop of monstrous size, She never slumber'd in her pew— But when she shut her eyes. Her love was sought, I do aver, By twenty beaux and more; The king himself has follow'd her— When she has walk'd before. But now, her wealth and finery fled, Her hangers-on cut short all; The doctors found, when she was dead— Her last disorder mortal. Let us lament in sorrow sore, For Kent Street well may say, That had she liv'd a twelvemonth more— She had not died to-day. EPIGRAM, ON A BEAUTIFUL YOUTH STRUCK BLIND BY LIGHTNING. Sure 'twas by Providence design'd, Rather in pity than in hate, That he should be, like Cupid, blind, To save him from Narcissus' fate. TO "SHE STOOPS TO CONQUER." SPOKEN BY MRS. BULKLEY, IN THE CHARACTER OF MISS HARDCASTLE. Well, having stoop'd to conquer with success, And gain'd a husband without aid from dress, Still, as a bar-maid, I could wish it too, As I have conquer'd him to conquer you: And let me say, for all your resolution, That pretty bar-maids have done execution. Our life is all a play, composed to please; "We have our exits and our entrances." The first act shows the simple country maid, Harmless and young, of everything afraid; Blushes when hired, and, with unmeaning action, "I hopes as how to give you satisfaction." Her second act displays a livelier scene,— The unblushing bar-maid of a country inn, Who whisks about the house, at market caters, Talks loud, coquets the guests, and scolds the waiters. Next the scene shifts to town, and there she soars, The chop-house toast of ogling connoisseurs: On 'squires and cits she there displays her arts, And on the gridiron broils her lovers' hearts; And, as she smiles, her triumphs to complete, E'en common-councilmen forget to eat. The fourth act shows her wedded to the 'squire, And madam now begins to hold it higher; Pretends to taste, at operas cries caro! And quits her Nancy Dawson for Che Faro: Doats upon dancing, and, in all her pride, Swims round the room, the Heinelle of Cheapside; Ogles and leers with artificial skill, Till, having lost in age the power to kill, She sits all night at cards, and ogles at spadille. Such through our lives the eventful history— The fifth and last act still remains for me: The bar-maid now for your protection prays, Turns female barrister, and pleads for bays. TO "THE GOOD-NATURED MAN." SPOKEN BY MRS. BULKLEY. As puffing quacks some caitiff wretch procure To swear the pill, or drop, has wrought a cure; Thus, on the stage, our play-wrights still depend For epilogues and prologues on some friend, Who knows each art of coaxing up the town, And make full many a bitter pill go down: Conscious of this, our bard has gone about, And teased each rhyming friend to help him out. An epilogue! things can't go on without it; It could not fail, would you but set about it: "Young man," cries one, (a bard laid up in clover,) "Alas! young man, my writing days are over; Let boys play tricks, and kick the straw, not I; Your brother doctor there, perhaps, may try," "What I! dear Sir," the doctor interposes; "What, plant my thistle, Sir, among his roses! No, no, I've other contests to maintain; To-night I heard our troops at Warwick-lane. Go ask your manager"—"Who, me! Your pardon, Those things are not our forte at Covent Garden." Our author's friends, thus placed at happy distance, Give him good words, indeed, but no assistance. As some unhappy wight, at some new play, At the pit door stands elbowing a way, While oft, with many a smile, and many a shrug, He eyes the centre, where his friends sit snug; His simpering friends, with pleasure in their eyes, Sink as he sinks, and as he rises rise: He nods, they nod; he cringes, they grimace; But not a soul will budge to give him place. Since, then, unhelp'd, our bard must now conform "To 'bide the pelting of this pitiless storm," Blame where you must, be candid where you can, And be each critic the Good-natured Man. Seated woman reading a book. STANZAS ON WOMAN.When lovely woman stoops to folly, And finds too late that men betray, What charm can soothe her melancholy, What art can wash her guilt away? The only art her guilt to cover, To hide her shame from every eye, To give repentance to her lover, And wring his bosom, is—to die. John Trott was desired by two witty peers To tell them the reason why asses had ears. "An't please you," quoth John, "I'm not given to letters, Nor dare I pretend to know more than my betters; Howe'er, from this time, I shall ne'er see your graces, As I hope to be saved!—without thinking on asses." SONG. The wretch condemn'd with life to part, Still, still on Hope relies; And every pang that rends the heart Bids expectation rise. Hope, like the glimmering taper's light, Adorns and cheers the way; And still, as darker grows the night, Emits a brighter ray. STANZAS. Weeping, murmuring, complaining, Lost to every gay delight, Myra, too sincere for feigning, Fears th'approaching bridal night. Yet why impair thy bright perfection? Or dim thy beauty with a tear? Had Myra follow'd my direction, She long had wanted cause of fear. EPILOGUE TO "SHE STOOPS TO CONQUER." INTENDED TO BE SPOKEN BY MRS. BULKLEY AND MISS CATLEY. Enters Mrs. Bulkley, who curtsies very low as beginning to speak. Then enters Miss Catley, who stands full before her, and curtsies to the Audience. MRS. BULKLEY. Hold, Ma'am, your pardon. What's your business here? The Epilogue. MRS. BULKLEY. The Epilogue? MISS CATLEY. Yes, the Epilogue, my dear. MRS. BULKLEY. Sure you mistake, Ma'am. The Epilogue, I bring it. MISS CATLEY. Excuse me, Ma'am. The author bid me sing it. Recitative. Ye beaux and belles, that form this splendid ring, Suspend your conversation while I sing. MRS. BULKLEY. Why, sure the girl's beside herself! an Epilogue of singing, A hopeful end, indeed, to such a blest beginning. Besides, a singer in a comic set— Excuse me, Ma'am, I know the etiquette. MISS CATLEY. What if we leave it to the house? MRS. BULKLEY. The house!—Agreed. MISS CATLEY. Agreed. MRS. BULKLEY. And she whose party's largest shall proceed. And first, I hope you'll readily agree I've all the critics and the wits for me. They, I am sure, will answer my commands; Ye candid judging few, hold up your hands. What! no return? I find too late, I fear, That modern judges seldom enter here. I'm for a different set:—Old men, whose trade is Still to gallant and dangle with the ladies. Recitative. Who mump their passion, and who, grimly smiling Still thus address the fair with voice beguiling. Air.—Cotillion. Turn, my fairest, turn, if ever Strephon caught thy ravish'd eye. Pity take on your swain so clever, Who without your aid must die. Yes, I shall die, hu, hu, hu, hu! Yes, I must die, ho, ho, ho, ho! Da Capo. MRS. BULKLEY. Let all the old pay homage to your merit; Give me the young, the gay, the men of spirit. Ye travell'd tribe, ye macaroni train, Of French friseurs and nosegays justly vain, Who take a trip to Paris once a year To dress, and look like awkward Frenchmen here,— Lend me your hand: O fatal news to tell, Their hands are only lent to the Heinelle. MISS CATLEY. Ay, take your travellers—travellers indeed! Give me my bonny Scot, that travels from the Tweed. Where are the chiels?—Ah! ah, I well discern The smiling looks of each bewitching bairn. Air.—A bonny young Lad is my Jocky. I sing to amuse you by night and by day, And be unco merry when you are but gay; When you with your bagpipes are ready to play, My voice shall be ready to carol away With Sandy, and Sawney, and Jockey, With Sawney, and Jarvie, and Jockey. Ye gamesters, who, so eager in pursuit, Make but of all your fortune one va toute: Ye jockey tribe, whose stock of words are few, "I hold the odds.—Done, done, with you, with you." Ye barristers, so fluent with grimace, "My Lord,—Your Lordship misconceives the case." Doctors, who cough and answer every misfortuner, "I wish I'd been called in a little sooner:" Assist my cause with hands and voices hearty, Come end the contest here, and aid my party. MISS CATLEY. Air.—Ballinamony Ye brave Irish lads, hark away to the crack, Assist me, I pray, in this woful attack; For—sure I don't wrong you—you seldom are slack, When the ladies are calling, to blush and hang back. For you're always polite and attentive, Still to amuse us inventive, And death is your only preventive: Your hands and your voices for me. MRS. BULKLEY. Well, Madam, what if, after all this sparring, We both agree, like friends, to end our jarring? MISS CATLEY. And that our friendship may remain unbroken, What if we leave the Epilogue unspoken? MRS. BULKLEY. Agreed. MISS CATLEY. Agreed. MRS. BULKLEY. And now with late repentance, Un-epilogued the Poet waits his sentence. Condemn the stubborn fool who can't submit To thrive by flattery, though he starves by wit. [Exeunt. |
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