The dressing-room of CHARLES WINSOR, owner of Meldon Court, near Newmarket; about eleven-thirty at night. The room has pale grey walls, unadorned; the curtains are drawn over a window Back Left Centre. A bed lies along the wall, Left. An open door, Right Back, leads into LADY ADELA's bedroom; a door, Right Forward, into a long corridor, on to which abut rooms in a row, the whole length of the house's left wing. WINSOR's dressing-table, with a light over it, is Stage Right of the curtained window. Pyjamas are laid out on the bed, which is turned back. Slippers are handy, and all the usual gear of a well-appointed bed-dressing-room. CHARLES WINSOR, a tall, fair, good-looking man about thirty-eight, is taking off a smoking jacket. WINSOR. Hallo! Adela! V. OF LADY A. [From her bedroom] Hallo! WINSOR. In bed? V. OF LADY A. No.
WINSOR. Win at Bridge? LADY A. No fear. WINSOR. Who did? LADY A. Lord St Erth and Ferdy De Levis. WINSOR. That young man has too much luck—the young bounder won two races to-day; and he's as rich as Croesus. LADY A. Oh! Charlie, he did look so exactly as if he'd sold me a carpet when I was paying him. WINSOR. [Changing into slippers] His father did sell carpets, wholesale, in the City. LADY A. Really? And you say I haven't intuition! [With a finger on her lips] Morison's in there. WINSOR. [Motioning towards the door, which she shuts] Ronny Dancy took a tenner off him, anyway, before dinner. LADY A. No! How? WINSOR. Standing jump on to a bookcase four feet high. De Levis had to pay up, and sneered at him for making money by parlour tricks. That young Jew gets himself disliked. LADY A. Aren't you rather prejudiced? WINSOR. Not a bit. I like Jews. That's not against him—rather the contrary these days. But he pushes himself. The General tells me he's deathly keen to get into the Jockey Club. [Taking off his tie] It's amusing to see him trying to get round old St Erth. LADY A. If Lord St Erth and General Canynge backed him he'd get in if he did sell carpets! WINSOR. He's got some pretty good horses. [Taking off his waistcoat] Ronny Dancy's on his bones again, I'm afraid. He had a bad day. When a chap takes to doing parlour stunts for a bet—it's a sure sign. What made him chuck the Army? LADY A. He says it's too dull, now there's no fighting. WINSOR. Well, he can't exist on backing losers. LADY A. Isn't it just like him to get married now? He really is the most reckless person. WINSOR. Yes. He's a queer chap. I've always liked him, but I've never quite made him out. What do you think of his wife? LADY A. Nice child; awfully gone on him. WINSOR. Is he? LADY A. Quite indecently—both of them. [Nodding towards the wall, Left] They're next door. WINSOR. Who's beyond them? LADY A. De Levis; and Margaret Orme at the end. Charlie, do you realise that the bathroom out there has to wash those four? WINSOR. I know. LADY A. Your grandfather was crazy when he built this wing; six rooms in a row with balconies like an hotel, and only one bath—if we hadn't put ours in. WINSOR. [Looking at his watch] Half-past eleven. [Yawns] Newmarket always makes me sleepy. You're keeping Morison up.
Come in.
Hallo! De Levis! Anything I can do for you? DE LEVIS. [In a voice whose faint exoticism is broken by a vexed excitement] I say, I'm awfully sorry, Winsor, but I thought I'd better tell you at once. I've just had—er—rather a lot of money stolen. WINSOR. What! [There is something of outrage in his tone and glance, as who should say: "In my house?"] How do you mean stolen? DE LEVIS. I put it under my pillow and went to have a bath; when I came back it was gone. WINSOR. Good Lord! How much? DE LEVIS. Nearly a thousand-nine hundred and seventy, I think. WINSOR. Phew! [Again the faint tone of outrage, that a man should have so much money about him]. DE LEVIS. I sold my Rosemary filly to-day on the course to Bentman the bookie, and he paid me in notes. WINSOR. What? That weed Dancy gave you in the Spring? DE LEVIS. Yes. But I tried her pretty high the other day; and she's in the Cambridgeshire. I was only out of my room a quarter of an hour, and I locked my door. WINSOR. [Again outraged] You locked— DE LEVIS. [Not seeing the fine shade] Yes, and had the key here. [He taps his pocket] Look here! [He holds out a pocket-book] It's been stuffed with my shaving papers. WINSOR. [Between feeling that such things don't happen, and a sense that he will have to clear it up] This is damned awkward, De Levis. DE LEVIS. [With steel in his voice] Yes. I should like it back. WINSOR. Have you got the numbers of the notes? DE LEVIS. No. WINSOR. What were they? DE LEVIS. One hundred, three fifties, and the rest tens and fives. WINSOR. What d'you want me to do? DE LEVIS. Unless there's anybody you think— WINSOR. [Eyeing him] Is it likely? DE Levis. Then I think the police ought to see my room. It's a lot of money. WINSOR. Good Lord! We're not in Town; there'll be nobody nearer than Newmarket at this time of night—four miles.
LADY A. [Closing the door] What is it? Are you ill, Mr De Levis? WINSOR. Worse; he's had a lot of money stolen. Nearly a thousand pounds. LADY A. Gracious! Where? DE LEVIS. From under my pillow, Lady Adela—my door was locked—I was in the bath-room. LADY A. But how fearfully thrilling! WINSOR. Thrilling! What's to be done? He wants it back. LADY A. Of course! [With sudden realisation] Oh! But Oh! it's quite too unpleasant! WINSOR. Yes! What am I to do? Fetch the servants out of their rooms? Search the grounds? It'll make the devil of a scandal. DE LEVIS. Who's next to me? LADY A. [Coldly] Oh! Mr De Levis! WINSOR. Next to you? The Dancys on this side, and Miss Orme on the other. What's that to do with it? DE LEVIS. They may have heard something. WINSOR. Let's get them. But Dancy was down stairs when I came up. Get Morison, Adela! No. Look here! When was this exactly? Let's have as many alibis as we can. DE LEVIS. Within the last twenty minutes, certainly. WINSOR. How long has Morison been up with you? LADY A. I came up at eleven, and rang for her at once. WINSOR. [Looking at his watch] Half an hour. Then she's all right. Send her for Margaret and the Dancys—there's nobody else in this wing. No; send her to bed. We don't want gossip. D'you mind going yourself, Adela? LADY A. Consult General Canynge, Charlie. WINSOR. Right. Could you get him too? D'you really want the police, De Levis? DE LEVIS. [Stung by the faint contempt in his tone of voice] Yes, I do. WINSOR. Then, look here, dear! Slip into my study and telephone to the police at Newmarket. There'll be somebody there; they're sure to have drunks. I'll have Treisure up, and speak to him. [He rings the bell].
WINSOR. Look here, De Levis! This isn't an hotel. It's the sort of thing that doesn't happen in a decent house. Are you sure you're not mistaken, and didn't have them stolen on the course? DE LEVIS. Absolutely. I counted them just before putting them under my pillow; then I locked the door and had the key here. There's only one door, you know. WINSOR. How was your window? DE LEVIS. Open. WINSOR. [Drawing back the curtains of his own window] You've got a balcony like this. Any sign of a ladder or anything? DE LEVIS. No. WINSOR. It must have been done from the window, unless someone had a skeleton key. Who knew you'd got that money? Where did Kentman pay you? DE LEVIS. Just round the corner in the further paddock. WINSOR. Anybody about? DE LEVIS. Oh, yes! WINSOR. Suspicious? DE LEVIS. I didn't notice anything. WINSOR. You must have been marked down and followed here. DE LEVIS. How would they know my room? WINSOR. Might have got it somehow. [A knock from the corridor] Come in.
TREISURE. [To WINSOR] Yes, sir? WINSOR. Who valets Mr De Levis? TREISURE. Robert, Sir. WINSOR. When was he up last? TREISURE. In the ordinary course of things, about ten o'clock, sir. WINSOR. When did he go to bed? TREISURE. I dismissed at eleven. WINSOR. But did he go? TREISURE. To the best of my knowledge. Is there anything I can do, sir? WINSOR. [Disregarding a sign from DE LEVIS] Look here, Treisure, Mr De Levis has had a large sum of money taken from his bedroom within the last half hour. TREISURE. Indeed, Sir! WINSOR. Robert's quite all right, isn't he? TREISURE. He is, sir. DE LEVIS. How do you know?
TREISURE. I am a pretty good judge of character, sir, if you'll excuse me. WINSOR. Look here, De Levis, eighty or ninety notes must have been pretty bulky. You didn't have them on you at dinner? DE LEVIS. No. WINSOR. Where did you put them? DE LEVIS. In a boot, and the boot in my suitcase, and locked it.
WINSOR. [Again slightly outraged by such precautions in his house] And you found it locked—and took them from there to put under your pillow? DE LEVIS. Yes. WINSOR. Run your mind over things, Treisure—has any stranger been about? TREISURE. No, Sir. WINSOR. This seems to have happened between 11.15 and 11.30. Is that right? [DE LEVIS nods] Any noise-anything outside-anything suspicious anywhere? TREISURE. [Running his mind—very still] No, sir. WINSOR. What time did you shut up? TREISURE. I should say about eleven-fifteen, sir. As soon as Major Colford and Captain Dancy had finished billiards. What was Mr De Levis doing out of his room, if I may ask, sir? WINSOR. Having a bath; with his room locked and the key in his pocket. TREISURE. Thank you, sir. DE LEVIS. [Conscious of indefinable suspicion] Damn it! What do you mean? I WAS! TREISURE. I beg your pardon, sir. WINSOR. [Concealing a smile] Look here, Treisure, it's infernally awkward for everybody. TREISURE. It is, sir. WINSOR. What do you suggest? TREISURE. The proper thing, sir, I suppose, would be a cordon and a complete search—in our interests. WINSOR. I entirely refuse to suspect anybody. TREISURE. But if Mr De Levis feels otherwise, sir? DE LEVIS. [Stammering] I? All I know is—the money was there, and it's gone. WINSOR. [Compunctious] Quite! It's pretty sickening for you. But so it is for anybody else. However, we must do our best to get it back for you.
WINSOR. Hallo!
Oh! It's you, General. Come in. Adela's told you?
WINSOR. Well, General, what's the first move? CANYNGE. [Lifting his eyebrows] Mr De Levis presses the matter? DE Levis. [Flicked again] Unless you think it's too plebeian of me, General Canynge—a thousand pounds. CANYNGE. [Drily] Just so! Then we must wait for the police, WINSOR. Lady Adela has got through to them. What height are these rooms from the ground, Treisure? TREISURE. Twenty-three feet from the terrace, sir. CANYNGE. Any ladders near? TREISURE. One in the stables, Sir, very heavy. No others within three hundred yards. CANYNGE. Just slip down, and see whether that's been moved. TREISURE. Very good, General. [He goes out.] DE LEVIS. [Uneasily] Of course, he—I suppose you— WINSOR. We do. CANYNGE. You had better leave this in our hands, De Levis. DE LEVIS. Certainly; only, the way he— WINSOR. [Curtly] Treisure has been here since he was a boy. I should as soon suspect myself. DE LEVIS. [Looking from one to the other—with sudden anger] You seem to think—! What was I to do? Take it lying down and let whoever it is get clear off? I suppose it's natural to want my money back?
WINSOR. [Turning] Of course, De Levis! DE LEVIS. [Sullenly] Well, I'll go to my room. When the police come, perhaps you'll let me know. He goes out. WINSOR. Phew! Did you ever see such a dressing-gown?
LADY A. I've told the Dancys—she was in bed. And I got through to Newmarket, Charles, and Inspector Dede is coming like the wind on a motor cycle. MARGARET. Did he say "like the wind," Adela? He must have imagination. Isn't this gorgeous? Poor little Ferdy! WINSOR. [Vexed] You might take it seriously, Margaret; it's pretty beastly for us all. What time did you come up? MARGARET. I came up with Adela. Am I suspected, Charles? How thrilling! WINSOR. Did you hear anything? MARGARET. Only little Ferdy splashing. WINSOR. And saw nothing? MARGARET. Not even that, alas! LADY A. [With a finger held up] Leste! Un peu leste! Oh! Here are the Dancys. Come in, you two!
WINSOR. Awfully sorry to disturb you, Mrs Dancy; but I suppose you and Ronny haven't heard anything. De Levis's room is just beyond Ronny's dressing-room, you know. MABEL. I've been asleep nearly half an hour, and Ronny's only just come up. CANYNGE. Did you happen to look out of your window, Mrs Dancy? MABEL. Yes. I stood there quite five minutes. CANYNGE. When? MABEL. Just about eleven, I should think. It was raining hard then. CANYNGE. Yes, it's just stopped. You saw nothing? MABEL. No. DANCY. What time does he say the money was taken? WINSOR. Between the quarter and half past. He'd locked his door and had the key with him. MARGARET. How quaint! Just like an hotel. Does he put his boots out? LADY A. Don't be so naughty, Meg. CANYNGE. When exactly did you come up, Dance? DANCY. About ten minutes ago. I'd only just got into my dressing-room before Lady Adela came. I've been writing letters in the hall since Colford and I finished billiards. CANYNGE. You weren't up for anything in between? DANCY. No. MARGARET. The mystery of the grey room. DANCY. Oughtn't the grounds to be searched for footmarks? CANYNGE. That's for the police. DANCY. The deuce! Are they coming? CANYNGE. Directly. [A knock] Yes?
Well? TREISURE. The ladder has not been moved, General. There isn't a sign. WINSOR. All right. Get Robert up, but don't say anything to him. By the way, we're expecting the police. TREISURE. I trust they will not find a mare's nest, sir, if I may say so.
WINSOR. De Levis has got wrong with Treisure. [Suddenly] But, I say, what would any of us have done if we'd been in his shoes? MARGARET. A thousand pounds? I can't even conceive having it. DANCY. We probably shouldn't have found it out. LADY A. No—but if we had. DANCY. Come to you—as he did. WINSOR. Yes; but there's a way of doing things. CANYNGE. We shouldn't have wanted the police. MARGARET. No. That's it. The hotel touch. LADY A. Poor young man; I think we're rather hard on him. WINSOR. He sold that weed you gave him, Dancy, to Kentman, the bookie, and these were the proceeds. DANCY. Oh! WINSOR. He'd tried her high, he said. DANCY. [Grimly] He would. MABEL. Oh! Ronny, what bad luck! WINSOR. He must have been followed here. [At the window] After rain like that, there ought to be footmarks.
MARGARET. Here's the wind! WINSOR. What's the move now, General? CANYNGE. You and I had better see the Inspector in De Levis's room, WINSOR. [To the others] If you'll all be handy, in case he wants to put questions for himself. MARGARET. I hope he'll want me; it's just too thrilling. DANCY. I hope he won't want me; I'm dog-tired. Come on, Mabel. [He puts his arm in his wife's]. CANYNGE. Just a minute, Charles.
WINSOR. Yes, General? CANYNGE. We must be careful with this Inspector fellow. If he pitches hastily on somebody in the house it'll be very disagreeable. WINSOR. By Jove! It will. CANYNGE. We don't want to rouse any ridiculous suspicion. WINSOR. Quite. [A knock] Come in! TREISURE enters. TREISURE. Inspector Dede, Sir. WINSOR. Show him in. TREISURE. Robert is in readiness, sir; but I could swear he knows nothing about it. WINSOR. All right.
WINSOR. Good evening, Inspector. Sorry to have brought you out at this time of night. INSPECTOR. Good evenin', sir. Mr WINSOR? You're the owner here, I think? WINSOR. Yes. General Canynge. INSPECTOR. Good evenin', General. I understand, a large sum of money? WINSOR. Yes. Shall we go straight to the room it was taken from? One of my guests, Mr De Levis. It's the third room on the left. CANYNGE. We've not been in there yet, Inspector; in fact, we've done nothing, except to find out that the stable ladder has not been moved. We haven't even searched the grounds. INSPECTOR. Right, sir; I've brought a man with me.
SCENE II
INSPECTOR. [Finishing a note] Now, sir, if this is the room as you left it for your bath, just show us exactly what you did after takin' the pocket-book from the suit case. Where was that, by the way? DE LEVIS. [Pointing] Where it is now—under the dressing-table.
INSPECTOR. [Writing]. We now have the room as it was when the theft was committed. Reconstruct accordin' to 'uman nature, gentlemen—assumin' the thief to be in the room, what would he try first?—the clothes, the dressin'-table, the suit case, the chest of drawers, and last the bed.
CANYNGE. [Sotto voce to WINSOR] The order would have been just the other way.
DE LEVIS. Can I come in again? INSPECTOR. [Standing up] Did you open the window, sir, or was it open when you first came in? DE LEVIS. I opened it. INSPECTOR. Drawin' the curtains back first? DE LEVIS. Yes. INSPECTOR. [Sharply] Are you sure there was nobody in the room already? DE LEVIS. [Taken aback] I don't know. I never thought. I didn't look under the bed, if you mean that. INSPECTOR. [Jotting] Did not look under bed. Did you look under it after the theft? DE LEVIS. No. I didn't. INSPECTOR. Ah! Now, what did you do after you came back from your bath? Just give us that precisely. DE LEVIS. Locked the door and left the key in. Put back my sponge, and took off my dressing-gown and put it there. [He points to the footrails of the bed] Then I drew the curtains, again. INSPECTOR. Shutting the window? DE LEVIS. No. I got into bed, felt for my watch to see the time. My hand struck the pocket-book, and somehow it felt thinner. I took it out, looked into it, and found the notes gone, and these shaving papers instead. INSPECTOR. Let me have a look at those, sir. [He applies the spy-glasses] And then? DE LEVIS. I think I just sat on the bed. INSPECTOR. Thinkin' and cursin' a bit, I suppose. Ye-es? DE LEVIS. Then I put on my dressing-gown and went straight to Mr WINSOR. INSPECTOR. Not lockin' the door? DE LEVIS. No. INSPECTOR. Exactly. [With a certain finality] Now, sir, what time did you come up? DE LEVIS. About eleven. INSPECTOR. Precise, if you can give it me. DE LEVIS. Well, I know it was eleven-fifteen when I put my watch under my pillow, before I went to the bath, and I suppose I'd been about a quarter of an hour undressing. I should say after eleven, if anything. INSPECTOR. Just undressin'? Didn't look over your bettin' book? DE LEVIS. No. INSPECTOR. No prayers or anything? DE LEVIS. No. INSPECTOR. Pretty slippy with your undressin' as a rule? DE LEVIS. Yes. Say five past eleven. INSPECTOR. Mr WINSOR, what time did the gentleman come to you? WINSOR. Half-past eleven. INSPECTOR. How do you fix that, sir? WINSOR. I'd just looked at the time, and told my wife to send her maid off. INSPECTOR. Then we've got it fixed between 11.15 and 11.30. [Jots] Now, sir, before we go further I'd like to see your butler and the footman that valets this gentleman. WINSOR. [With distaste] Very well, Inspector; only—my butler has been with us from a boy. INSPECTOR. Quite so. This is just clearing the ground, sir. WINSOR. General, d'you mind touching that bell? CANYNGE rings a bell by the bed. INSPECTOR. Well, gentlemen, there are four possibilities. Either the thief was here all the time, waiting under the bed, and slipped out after this gentleman had gone to Mr WINSOR. Or he came in with a key that fits the lock; and I'll want to see all the keys in the house. Or he came in with a skeleton key and out by the window, probably droppin' from the balcony. Or he came in by the window with a rope or ladder and out the same way. [Pointing] There's a footmark here from a big boot which has been out of doors since it rained. CANYNGE. Inspector—you er—walked up to the window when you first came into the room. INSPECTOR. [Stiffly] I had not overlooked that, General. CANYNGE. Of course.
WINSOR. Come in.
INSPECTOR. You valet Mr—Mr De Levis, I think? ROBERT. Yes, sir. INSPECTOR. At what time did you take his clothes and boots? ROBERT. Ten o'clock, sir. INSPECTOR. [With a pounce] Did you happen to look under his bed? ROBERT. No, sir. INSPECTOR. Did you come up again, to bring the clothes back? ROBERT. No, sir; they're still downstairs. INSPECTOR. Did you come up again for anything? ROBERT. No, Sir. INSPECTOR. What time did you go to bed? ROBERT. Just after eleven, Sir. INSPECTOR. [Scrutinising him] Now, be careful. Did you go to bed at all? ROBERT. No, Sir. INSPECTOR. Then why did you say you did? There's been a theft here, and anything you say may be used against you. ROBERT. Yes, Sir. I meant, I went to my room. INSPECTOR. Where is your room? ROBERT. On the ground floor, at the other end of the right wing, sir. WINSOR. It's the extreme end of the house from this, Inspector. He's with the other two footmen. INSPECTOR. Were you there alone? ROBERT. No, Sir. Thomas and Frederick was there too. TREISURE. That's right; I've seen them. INSPECTOR. [Holding up his hand for silence] Were you out of the room again after you went in? ROBERT. No, Sir. INSPECTOR. What were you doing, if you didn't go to bed? ROBERT. [To WINSOR] Beggin' your pardon, Sir, we were playin' Bridge. INSPECTOR. Very good. You can go. I'll see them later on. ROBERT. Yes, Sir. They'll say the same as me. He goes out, leaving a smile on the face of all except the INSPECTOR and DE LEVIS. INSPECTOR. [Sharply] Call him back.
ROBERT. Yes, Sir? INSPECTOR. Did you notice anything particular about Mr De Levis's clothes? ROBERT. Only that they were very good, Sir. INSPECTOR. I mean—anything peculiar? ROBERT. [After reflection] Yes, Sir. INSPECTOR. Well? ROBERT. A pair of his boots this evenin' was reduced to one, sir. INSPECTOR. What did you make of that? ROBERT. I thought he might have thrown the other at a cat or something. INSPECTOR. Did you look for it? ROBERT. No, Sir; I meant to draw his attention to it in the morning. INSPECTOR. Very good. ROBERT. Yes, Sir. [He goes again.] INSPECTOR. [Looking at DE LEVIS] Well, sir, there's your story corroborated. DE LEVIS. [Stiffly] I don't know why it should need corroboration, Inspector. INSPECTOR. In my experience, you can never have too much of that. [To WINSOR] I understand there's a lady in the room on this side [pointing Left] and a gentleman on this [pointing Right] Were they in their rooms? WINSOR. Miss Orme was; Captain Dancy not. INSPECTOR. Do they know of the affair? WINSOR. Yes. INSPECTOR. Well, I'd just like the keys of their doors for a minute. My man will get them.
[To TREISURE] You can go with him.
In the meantime I'll just examine the balcony.
WINSOR. [To CANYNGE] Damn De Levis and his money! It's deuced invidious, all this, General. CANYNGE. The Inspector's no earthly.
CONSTABLE. [Handing key] Room on the left, Sir. [Handing key] Room on the right, sir.
INSPECTOR. Put them back.
I'll have to try every key in the house, sir. WINSOR. Inspector, do you really think it necessary to disturb the whole house and knock up all my guests? It's most disagreeable, all this, you know. The loss of the money is not such a great matter. Mr De Levis has a very large income. CANYNGE. You could get the numbers of the notes from Kentman the bookmaker, Inspector; he'll probably have the big ones, anyway. INSPECTOR. [Shaking his head] A bookie. I don't suppose he will, sir. It's come and go with them, all the time. WINSOR. We don't want a Meldon Court scandal, Inspector. INSPECTOR. Well, Mr WINSOR, I've formed my theory.
And I don't say to try the keys is necessary to it; but strictly, I ought to exhaust the possibilities. WINSOR. What do you say, De Levis? D'you want everybody in the house knocked up so that their keys can be tried? DE LEVIS. [Whose face, since his return, expresses a curious excitement] No, I don't. INSPECTOR. Very well, gentlemen. In my opinion the thief walked in before the door was locked, probably during dinner; and was under the bed. He escaped by dropping from the balcony—the creeper at that corner [he points stage Left] has been violently wrenched. I'll go down now, and examine the grounds, and I'll see you again Sir. [He makes another entry in his note-book] Goodnight, then, gentlemen! CANYNGE. Good-night! WINSOR. [With relief] I'll come with you, Inspector.
DE LEVIS. [Suddenly] General, I know who took them. CANYNGE. The deuce you do! Are you following the Inspector's theory? DE LEVIS. [Contemptuously] That ass! [Pulling the shaving papers out of the case] No! The man who put those there was clever and cool enough to wrench that creeper off the balcony, as a blind. Come and look here, General. [He goes to the window; the GENERAL follows. DE LEVIS points stage Right] See the rail of my balcony, and the rail of the next? [He holds up the cord of his dressing-gown, stretching his arms out] I've measured it with this. Just over seven feet, that's all! If a man can take a standing jump on to a narrow bookcase four feet high and balance there, he'd make nothing of that. And, look here! [He goes out on the balcony and returns with a bit of broken creeper in his hand, and holds it out into the light] Someone's stood on that—the stalk's crushed—the inner corner too, where he'd naturally stand when he took his jump back. CANYNGE. [After examining it—stiffly] That other balcony is young Dancy's, Mr De Levis; a soldier and a gentleman. This is an extraordinary insinuation. DE LEVIS. Accusation. CANYNGE. What! DE LEVIS. I have intuitions, General; it's in my blood. I see the whole thing. Dancy came up, watched me into the bathroom, tried my door, slipped back into his dressing-room, saw my window was open, took that jump, sneaked the notes, filled the case up with these, wrenched the creeper there [He points stage Left] for a blind, jumped back, and slipped downstairs again. It didn't take him four minutes altogether. CANYNGE. [Very gravely] This is outrageous, De Levis. Dancy says he was downstairs all the time. You must either withdraw unreservedly, or I must confront you with him. DE LEVIS. If he'll return the notes and apologise, I'll do nothing— except cut him in future. He gave me that filly, you know, as a hopeless weed, and he's been pretty sick ever since, that he was such a flat as not to see how good she was. Besides, he's hard up, I know. CANYNGE. [After a vexed turn up and down the room] It's mad, sir, to jump to conclusions like this. DE LEVIS. Not so mad as the conclusion Dancy jumped to when he lighted on my balcony. CANYNGE. Nobody could have taken this money who did not know you had it. DE LEVIS. How do you know that he didn't? CANYNGE. Do you know that he did? DE LEVIS. I haven't the least doubt of it. CANYNGE. Without any proof. This is very ugly, De Levis. I must tell WINSOR. DE LEVIS. [Angrily] Tell the whole blooming lot. You think I've no feelers, but I've felt the atmosphere here, I can tell you, General. If I were in Dancy's shoes and he in mine, your tone to me would be very different. CANYNGE. [Suavely frigid] I'm not aware of using any tone, as you call it. But this is a private house, Mr De Levis, and something is due to our host and to the esprit de corps that exists among gentlemen. DE LEVIS. Since when is a thief a gentleman? Thick as thieves—a good motto, isn't it? CANYNGE. That's enough! [He goes to the door, but stops before opening it] Now, look here! I have some knowledge of the world. Once an accusation like this passes beyond these walls no one can foresee the consequences. Captain Dancy is a gallant fellow, with a fine record as a soldier; and only just married. If he's as innocent as—Christ—mud will stick to him, unless the real thief is found. In the old days of swords, either you or he would not have gone out of this room alive. It you persist in this absurd accusation, you will both of you go out of this room dead in the eyes of Society: you for bringing it, he for being the object of it. DE LEVIS. Society! Do you think I don't know that I'm only tolerated for my money? Society can't add injury to insult and have my money as well, that's all. If the notes are restored I'll keep my mouth shut; if they're not, I shan't. I'm certain I'm right. I ask nothing better than to be confronted with Dancy; but, if you prefer it, deal with him in your own way—for the sake of your esprit de corps. CANYNGE. 'Pon my soul, Mr De Levis, you go too far. DE LEVIS. Not so far as I shall go, General Canynge, if those notes aren't given back. WINSOR comes in. WINSOR. Well, De Levis, I'm afraid that's all we can do for the present. So very sorry this should have happened in my house. CANYNGE. [Alter a silence] There's a development, WINSOR. Mr De Levis accuses one of your guests. WINSOR. What? CANYNGE. Of jumping from his balcony to this, taking the notes, and jumping back. I've done my best to dissuade him from indulging the fancy—without success. Dancy must be told. DE LEVIS. You can deal with Dancy in your own way. All I want is the money back. CANYNGE. [Drily] Mr De Levis feels that he is only valued for his money, so that it is essential for him to have it back. WINSOR. Damn it! This is monstrous, De Levis. I've known Ronald Dancy since he was a boy. CANYNGE. You talk about adding injury to insult, De Levis. What do you call such treatment of a man who gave you the mare out of which you made this thousand pounds? DE LEVIS. I didn't want the mare; I took her as a favour. CANYNGE. With an eye to possibilities, I venture to think—the principle guides a good many transactions. DE LEVIS. [As if flicked on a raw spot] In my race, do you mean? CANYNGE. [Coldly] I said nothing of the sort. DE LEVIS. No; you don't say these things, any of you. CANYNGE. Nor did I think it. DE LEVIS. Dancy does. WINSOR. Really, De Levis, if this is the way you repay hospitality— DE LEVIS. Hospitality that skins my feelings and costs me a thousand pounds! CANYNGE. Go and get Dancy, WINSOR; but don't say anything to him.
CANYNGE. Perhaps you will kindly control yourself, and leave this to me.
CANYNGE. For WINSOR's sake, Dancy, we don't want any scandal or fuss about this affair. We've tried to make the police understand that. To my mind the whole thing turns on our finding who knew that De Levis had this money. It's about that we want to consult you. WINSOR. Kentman paid De Levis round the corner in the further paddock, he says.
CANYNGE. Did you hear anything that throws light, Dancy? As it was your filly originally, we thought perhaps you might. DANCY. I? No. CANYNGE. Didn't hear of the sale on the course at all? DANCY. No. CANYNGE. Then you can't suggest any one who could have known? Nothing else was taken, you see. DANCY. De Levis is known to be rolling, as I am known to be stony. CANYNGE. There are a good many people still rolling, besides Mr De Levis, but not many people with so large a sum in their pocket-books. DANCY. He won two races. DE LEVIS. Do you suggest that I bet in ready money? DANCY. I don't know how you bet, and I don't care. CANYNGE. You can't help us, then? DANCY. No. I can't. Anything else? [He looks fixedly at DE LEVIS]. CANYNGE. [Putting his hand on DANCY's arm] Nothing else, thank you, Dancy.
WINSOR. You see, De Levis? He didn't even know you'd got the money. DE LEVIS. Very conclusive. WINSOR. Well! You are—!
INSPECTOR. I'm just going, gentlemen. The grounds, I'm sorry to say, have yielded nothing. It's a bit of a puzzle. CANYNGE. You've searched thoroughly? INSPECTOR. We have, General. I can pick up nothing near the terrace. WINSOR. [After a look at DE LEVIS, whose face expresses too much] H'm! You'll take it up from the other end, then, Inspector? INSPECTOR. Well, we'll see what we can do with the bookmakers about the numbers, sir. Before I go, gentlemen—you've had time to think it over— there's no one you suspect in the house, I suppose?
WINSOR. [Emphatically] No.
INSPECTOR. If you're coming in to the racing to-morrow, sir, you might give us a call. I'll have seen Kentman by then. WINSOR. Right you are, Inspector. Good night, and many thanks. INSPECTOR. You're welcome, sir. [He goes out.] WINSOR. Gosh! I thought that chap [With a nod towards the balcony] was going to—! Look here, General, we must stop his tongue. Imagine it going the rounds. They may never find the real thief, you know. It's the very devil for Dancy. CANYNGE. WINSOR! Dancy's sleeve was damp. WINSOR. How d'you mean? CANYNGE. Quite damp. It's been raining.
WINSOR. I—I don't follow— [His voice is hesitative and lower, showing that he does]. CANYNGE. It was coming down hard; a minute out in it would have been enough—[He motions with his chin towards the balcony]. WINSOR. [Hastily] He must have been out on his balcony since. CANYNGE. It stopped before I came up, half an hour ago. WINSOR. He's been leaning on the wet stone, then. CANYNGE. With the outside of the upper part of the arm? WINSOR. Against the wall, perhaps. There may be a dozen explanations. [Very low and with great concentration] I entirely and absolutely refuse to believe anything of the sort against Ronald Dancy in my house. Dash it, General, we must do as we'd be done by. It hits us all—it hits us all. The thing's intolerable. CANYNGE. I agree. Intolerable. [Raising his voice] Mr De Levis! DE LEVIS returns into view, in the centre of the open window. CANYNGE. [With cold decision] Young Dancy was an officer and is a gentleman; this insinuation is pure supposition, and you must not make it. Do you understand me? DE LEVIS. My tongue is still mine, General, if my money isn't! CANYNGE. [Unmoved] Must not. You're a member of three Clubs, you want to be member of a fourth. No one who makes such an insinuation against a fellow-guest in a country house, except on absolute proof, can do so without complete ostracism. Have we your word to say nothing? DE LEVIS. Social blackmail? H'm! CANYNGE. Not at all—simple warning. If you consider it necessary in your interests to start this scandal-no matter how, we shall consider it necessary in ours to dissociate ourselves completely from one who so recklessly disregards the unwritten code. DE LEVIS. Do you think your code applies to me? Do you, General? CANYNGE. To anyone who aspires to be a gentleman, Sir. DE LEVIS. Ah! But you haven't known me since I was a boy. CANYNGE. Make up your mind.
DE LEVIS. I'm not a fool, General. I know perfectly well that you can get me outed. CANYNGE. [Icily] Well? DE LEVIS. [Sullenly] I'll say nothing about it, unless I get more proof. CANYNGE. Good! We have implicit faith in Dancy.
DE LEVIS. [To himself] Rats!
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