ROY BLAKELEY
LOST, STRAYED OR STOLEN
BY
PERCY KEESE FITZHUGH
Author of
TOM SLADE, BOY SCOUT, TOM SLADE AT BLACK LAKE, ROY BLAKELEY, ETC.
ILLUSTRATED BY HOWARD L. HASTINGS
PUBLISHED WITH THE APPROVAL OF THE BOY SCOUTS OF AMERICA
GROSSET & DUNLAP PUBLISHERS : : NEW YORK
Made in the United States of America COPYRIGHT, 1921, BY
GROSSET & DUNLAP Table of Contents ROY BLAKELEY, LOST, STRAYED OR STOLEN CHAPTER I—LAW AND THINGSOne thing, anyway, I wouldn’t say anything against the scout laws because they are good laws, that’s one sure thing. Even fellows that disobey them have to admit that they are good. If there weren’t any we couldn’t even disobey them, so gee whiz, I’m glad they are in the Handbook. That’s what they are for. I don’t mean we want to disobey them. But anyway, this is what I mean, that even fellows that disobey them ought to be glad they are there, because if they weren’t there they couldn’t disobey them. That’s what Pee-wee Harris calls logic. He says he knows a lot about logic, because his uncle has a friend whose brother is a lawyer. There are twelve of those laws, and the one I like best is law number eight, because it says a scout has to be cheerful and smile a lot. I always smile except when I’m asleep, and I’m not asleep much, because a scout is supposed to be wide awake. When I’m asleep I never disobey any of those laws. I’ll tell you some more about the scout laws, too, only this isn’t going to be a law book, you can bet. A scout is always supposed to do a given task. His dinner is a given task. He’s supposed to do a good turn every day. Maybe you think those are hard, but they are easy. If a scout in my patrol had some gumdrops and I ate half of them so he wouldn’t get sick, that would be a good turn. See? A scout is supposed to save life, too. Once I saved Wig Weigand’s life. He nearly died laughing at Pee-wee Harris, and I got there just in time to push the kid off the springboard into the water so he had to stop talking. That’s one thing I’m crazy about. I don’t mean talking, I mean swimming. Especially a scout is supposed to be observant. That’s one thing about the scouts my sister doesn’t like. She’s crazy about tennis, my sister is; tennis and strawberries. She’s crazy about Harry Donnelle, too; he’s a big fellow. That’s why she doesn’t like it about scouts being observant—I should worry. But anyway, you needn’t think that scouts are always smiling. Lots of times I laugh, he he, but I’m not happy. That’s because we have a lot of trouble on account of not being able to keep our meeting place in one spot very long. Gee williger, Washington had a lot of headquarters and we only have one headquarters, but we have our headquarters in as many places as he did. Gee, there are a lot of people that have to move these days, but they don’t have to move the houses they live in, that’s one good thing. When you have to take your house with you, that’s no fun. Housing problems are bad enough, and transportation problems are bad enough. And besides, I hate problems anyway, especially in arithmetic. But, gee whiz, when you get a housing problem and a transportation problem all rolled into one-good night! CHAPTER II—MORE THINGS (I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO CALL IT)Now that chapter was about law and this one is about geography, kind of. Maybe I’ll have one about civil government, too. I bet you’ll skip that one, hey? Anyway, I’m glad we don’t have uncivil government in school, because I guess that’s worse. There’s a civil engineer in our town and he’s not so civil. A scout has to be civil, that’s another law. I guess before I tell you any geography, I’ll tell you some history. That’s my favorite study—history. I got nine points in that last term. A couple of years ago, Mr. Temple, he’s rich, he owns a lot of railroads—a couple of years ago he gave us an old railroad car to use for a scout headquarters. That car used to stand on a side up at Brewster’s Centre, and it was used for a station until the railroad built a new station. Then Mr. Temple told the railroad people to bring it down to Bridgeboro, where we live, but instead of doing that they took it ’way out west by mistake. Anyway, we were glad because we happened to be in it. I said, “I don’t care how far it takes us as long as it doesn’t roll down the Pacific slope and dump us in the ocean.” We had a lot of fun riding around the country in that car, because the railroad made a lot of dandy mistakes, and it was pretty nearly a week before we came rolling merrily, merrily on we go, into Bridgeboro. Good night, that was some ride. That shows you never can tell, because everybody said they never thought that old car had enough spirit to break loose and go tearing around the country. It had a kind of a fit, that’s what Westy Martin said; he’s in my patrol. The reason all that happened was because there was some kind of a mistake on a way-bill. That way-bill did us a good turn, all right. So after we got back home all safe and sound, that old car stood on the tracks down at the Bridgeboro station and all the commuters were laughing at it. A lot we cared, because even people laughed at Christopher Columbus when he got home. So now I’m going to leave that old car standing on the tracks at Bridgeboro station, because I have to go downstairs to supper. Oh, boy, I hope the six thirty-four express doesn’t come along and bump into it while I’m eating. I bet you’re all nervous and excited, hey? CHAPTER III—PEE-WEE STARTS THE BALL ROLLINGI guess the railroad men weren’t going to take any more chances with that car. Anyway, they put it on a track and then Mr. Corber—he’s section superintendent—he asked us what we wanted to do about the car. He asked us where we wanted it put. Believe me, that wasn’t an easy question to answer, because you can’t put a railroad car anywhere you want to put it. A railroad car is like a scout, because it can follow a track, but if there aren’t any tracks how is it going to get anywhere? But one thing, you can bet we didn’t want to have our scout meeting place down right next to the railroad station, because scouts are supposed to study nature and a lot of fun we’d have studying commuters. Pee-wee said, “The station is all right; I vote to leave the car right where it is.” “That’s because it’s near Bennett’s,” I told him, because he usually parks all through vacation at Bennett’s Confectionery. He’s the one that put the scream in ice cream. Harry Donnelle endowed a stool in Bennett’s just for Pee-wee—it’s kind of like a bed in a hospital or a scholarship, or something or other like that. The rest of the fellows said, “No, siree, the river for us! We want it moved down near the river! Let’s move it to Van Schlessenhoff’s field!” Now comes the geography part; it’s about Bridgeboro and that field. Mr. Van Schlessenhoff had a lot of land but he cut it all up. It’s a wonder he didn’t cut his name up, too, hey? He could have got a whole lot of nice little names out of it. Once he owned most all of Bridgeboro, that man did. He owned nearly the whole alphabet, too. Jimmy, he takes up nearly the whole telephone book, that’s what Connie Bennett says. Years and years and years and years and years and years ago—even before I was born—that man’s father had a sawmill down by the river. He never said anything but just sawed wood. When he died he was awful poor. He didn’t leave anything to his son but his name, that’s what my father said. Gee whiz, that was enough. Anyway, Mr. Van Schlessenhoff is a mighty nice man. He owns some lots and things, and he wouldn’t sell one of his fields for the town to build a school on. So you can see from that what a nice man he is. He owned that field down by the river that we were talking about. There is an old railroad track from that field right up to the Bridgeboro station, so they could send lumber away. It’s all old and rusty and broken in lots of places, and the piles are all kind of rotten where it goes across Cat-tail Marsh. Up in town it’s all buried in the dirt, sort of, but you can see the old rails good and plain where they go across Main Street. You can find those rails where they go across Willow Place, too, and they run right under Slausen’s Auto Repair Shop and across the yards in back. You can pick out those rusty old rails underneath the long grass all the way across the Sneezenbunker land and almost right up to the station. One Saturday we picked them out all the way, just for fun. I guess there wasn’t much to Bridgeboro when those tracks were used. So that’s all there is about history and geography in this story. The rest of it is all adventure. That’s my favorite study—adventure. That same night that we got back from our wild ride we decided to go and see Mr. Van Schlessenhoff and ask him if he’d be willing for us to move our car down to his field by the river, and have it there for a meeting place. He was awful nice. He said he’d be glad to do it because he liked the boy scouts, but that there was one reason why he couldn’t. He said that reason was because he was going to put that field in the market. Then, all of a sudden, up spoke our young hero, Hon. Pee-wee Harris, and he said, “You take my advice, Mr. Van Schlessenhoff, and don’t put that field in the market. You leave it where it is, right down there by the river; that’s a dandy place.” Mr. Van Schlessenhoff laughed so hard that he said he guessed it would be all right for us to go ahead if we could navigate the car, because maybe he would leave that field right there and not put it in the market after all. So you can see how all this crazy stuff was started by Pee-wee. He set the ball rolling—I mean the car. And oh, boy—— CHAPTER IV—WE TRY DIPLOMACYI made a map. It isn’t much good and it doesn’t show all the streets in our town, but it shows the streets that old track crosses. On Main Street, almost opposite the station, is Bennett’s. I put that in because I thought maybe you’d like to know where it is. It hasn’t got anything to do with our adventures in this story, but it’s in the story a lot, just the same. When that old track was new I guess there wasn’t any Willow Place; I guess Main Street didn’t amount to much either. There wasn’t any building where Slausen’s is, that’s sure. And Tony’s Lunch Wagon wasn’t there, that’s sure. They didn’t have any big grammar school in Bridgeboro then. Those were the happy days. Now the first night after we got home after our wild ride, we had a troop meeting to see if we could think up any way to get our car from the station over to Van Schlessenhoff’s field. Because what’s the use of having a home if you haven’t got any place to put it? Be it never so humble, you’ve got to have a place to put your home. We had that meeting right in the car near the station. Pee-wee said that he’d be a committee to go out and look at the tracks. All he wanted was a chance to go over to Bennett’s. I said, “This is no time for ice cream cones with the transportation problem staring us in the face. It’s bad enough to be put out of your home, but to have your home put out, that’s worse. You don’t suppose the railroad is going to leave this car here, do you?” “We’ll be convicted,” Pee-wee shouted. He meant evicted. “We won’t leave our home, we’ll take it with us!” two or three of them began shouting. “Those tracks are good all the way across Cat-tail Marsh,” El Sawyer said, “because I walked the ties right down to the river.” “If they held you they ought to hold the car,” I said. Crinkums, that fellow weighs about a ton. Then Hunt Ward (he’s in the Elks) began singing: I love, I love, I love my home, But what’ll we do with it? Ralph Warner (he’s in my patrol, he’s got red hair), he said, “I promised my mother I’d never run away from home.” “But you didn’t promise her that you wouldn’t run away in your home, did you?” Doc wanted to know. “That’s a teckinality,” Pee-wee shouted; “they use those in courts.” “You mean technicality,” I told him; “shut up unless you’ve got a suggestion to make. We’re here to decide how we’re going to get somewhere else. There are a lot of obstacles. I move——” “How are we going to move, that’s what I’d like to know?” Dorry Benton shouted. “Maybe Mr. Bennett will be able to give us a suggestion,” the kid shouted. “There you go again,” I told him. “Will you forget about Bennett’s and get down to business? How are we going to get this meeting place over to Van Schlessenhoff’s field?” “I was the one who made him say all right!” the kid piped up. “I made him laugh!” “You’re enough to make a weeping willow laugh,” I told him. “You secured the field and it’s nearly a half a mile away.” “All we’ve got to do is to get the car there,” he said. “Sure, that’s all,” I told him. “The track is good,” Westy said. “How about motive power?” Doc wanted to know. “How about which?” they all shouted. “I make a motion——” Pee-wee began screaming. I said, “If you don’t keep still a minute, I’ll make a couple of motions and you’ll land under one of the seats. I want suggestions. If we can only manage to get this old car across Willow Place, the rest will be easy. It’s down hill all the way across the Sneezenbunker land right down to the marsh. If we get her as far as the marsh we’ll get her across all right.” “The track down there wouldn’t hold a locomotive,” Westy said. “We should worry about a locomotive,” I told him; “there are other ways. But how are we going to get her by Tony’s? And how about Slausen’s on Willow Place? Do you think they’re going to get out of the way if we toot a horn? Tony’s lunch wagon is all boarded up underneath, and you know what an ugly old grouch he is.” “Maybe if we bought a lot of frankfurters from him,” our young hero said, “maybe then he’d—kind of—— That’s what you call diplomacy.” “Diplomacy is what governments do,” Connie Bennett said. “Do you mean to say that England would do anything for the United States just because we bought a frankfurter for King George?” “You’re crazy!” Pee-wee shot back at him. “Diplomacy is when you’re very nice and polite so as to get something you want.” “Like two helpings of dessert,” I told him. “But anyway, I know something better than diplomacy,” he shouted; “and that’s strategy.” I said, “All right, as long as everybody’s shouting at once and we’re not getting anywhere, let’s go over to Tony’s and if we can’t dip him maybe we can strat him.” So that’s the way it was, the first thing we did to get that car moved was to go over to Tony’s and each buy a frankfurter. There were twenty-four of us in there at once. Twenty-four frankfurters are a good many for one fellow—I don’t mean for one fellow to eat, but for one fellow to sell. After that we asked Tony if he would just as soon let us take the boards away from underneath his wagon so that he could move the wagon away from over those old sunken, rusty tracks, just about seven or eight feet or so. He said, “No mova. Gotta de license. No mova.” Gee whiz, if that’s what you call diplomacy, I like arithmetic better, and that isn’t saying much. CHAPTER V—WE GO OVER THE GROUNDThe next night Mr. Ellsworth (he’s our scoutmaster) came out early from the city so he could follow that track with us over to the river and say if he thought there was any chance of getting the car to the shore. Tom Slade (he works in Temple Camp office) went with us. Before he was grown up he was in the Elk Patrol, but he’s assistant scoutmaster now. He doesn’t say much—he’s like Pee-wee, only different. He started the Elk Patrol, I started the Silver Foxes, and I’ll finish them, too, if they don’t look out. Gee, you can’t keep that bunch quiet. The Silver Fox Patrol is all right, only it hasn’t got any muffler. Mr. MacKeller went with us, too, that night. He’s County Engineer. He’s got dandy apple trees up at his house. He went so he could decide if the track was safe over the marsh. Because, gee whiz, we didn’t want to break down and have our summer home in among a lot of cat-tails. I hate cats anyway. My sister has two of them. We all met Mr. Ellsworth and Mr. MacKeller at the station and then we started following the old track. Some places we could hardly find the rails at all. We didn’t stop at Tony’s because Mr. Ellsworth said buying frankfurters wouldn’t do any good. He said Tony’s wasn’t the worst part of our trouble; he said Slausen’s Auto Repair Shop was worse, because it was a regular building. After we got by Slausen’s, the tracks were buried in the earth across the Sneezenbunker land. Some places they were as deep as an inch under the ground. But where that land began to slant down into the marsh the track came out good and plain. Before it got right into the marsh it ran along on an old kind of rotten trestle, and it ran all the way across the marsh on that. I guess that trestle was about three or four feet above the marsh. It’s there yet, only you can’t see it from the town on account of the high cat-tails all around. That marsh sort of peters out into Van Schlessenhoff’s field, right close to the river, and there the track is flat on the land again and in some places it’s away under the grass. Mr. MacKeller said he didn’t know how we’d get the car over there, but he guessed the trestle across the marsh would hold it all right. He said even if it collapsed there probably wouldn’t be much damage, only the car would be broken and we’d never get it away from there, and if we camped in it we’d be eaten up by mosquitoes. “Good night,” I told him; “if there’s any eating to be done we want to be the ones to do it.” He said that getting Tony’s lunch wagon and Slausen’s Auto Repair Shop out of the way wasn’t the kind of work for an engineer. “That’s a job for a strategist,” he said. Oh, boy, you should have heard Pee-wee shout. “What did I tell you? What did I tell you?” he began hollering. Honest, I was afraid he’d tumble off the trestle into the marsh. CHAPTER VI—SCOUT STRATEGYWesty Martin (he’s in my patrol; he’s my special chum), he said, “The only way to do is to go to work systematically.” “Sister what?” Pee-wee shouted. “Systematically,” I told him; “that means without any help from our sisters. Now shut up.” “How long is it going to take to move that car all the way from the station over to the river? That’s what I’d like to know,” he shouted. “About forty-eight hours and three months,” I said. “If you’ll give Westy a chance to speak, maybe he’ll give us an idea.” We were all walking back up to town after our inspection of the old sunken tracks, and I could see that Westy was kind of silent; I mean I could hear that he was silent; I mean—you know what I mean—I should worry. Maybe you can’t hear a fellow being silent. You can never hear Pee-wee being silent, that’s one sure thing. Westy was frowning just as if it was the end of vacation, and I knew he was thinking some thinks. Pretty soon he said, “The two hardest things are getting the car past Tony’s Lunch Wagon and past Slausen’s Auto Repair Shop. After that it will be clear sailing—I mean rolling. I say let’s have a big scout rally in Downing’s lot. Let’s have games and races and everything, and ask all the scout troops for miles and miles around, and everybody’ll have to be good and hungry.” “That’s easy!” Pee-wee shouted. “Sure,” Connie Bennett piped up. “We’ll have the East Bridgeboro Troop over because there’s a fat scout in that troop.” “I know the one you mean,” Hunt Ward said. “He’s shaped like a ferry boat.” I said, “Sure, and here’s our own dear Pee-wee; he’s a whole famine in himself. He wouldn’t dare to look Hoover in the face.” “But what’s the idea?” Dorry wanted to know. “You started an argument and you haven’t got any premises.” “Some highbrow,” I told him. “Sure, Downing’s lot is the premises,” our young hero piped up. “Premises is a place.” “I’ve hiked all over but I’ve never been to that place,” I told him. “Can you get ice cream cones there?” “Premises is the basis of an argument,” Westy said. “You choose your premises and stand on it.” “A stepladder is good enough for me,” I said. “Premises is real estate!” the kid fairly yelled. “Everybody knows that.” “I don’t know it,” Punk Odell said, “and I’m everybody.” “You mean you think you are,” Pee-wee shot back. “Well,” I said, “what’s the difference whether it’s real estate or imitation estate? That isn’t finding out how we’re going to get the car past Tony’s, is it? Give Westy a chance to speak. Let’s have a large chunk of silence.” That’s always the way it is with us. We never can decide anything because we all talk at once and we jump from one subject to another. Especially when Pee-wee’s along. Mr. Ellsworth (he’s our scoutmaster, he’s got a dandy dog), he says that silence is golden. But believe me, the Silver Foxes don’t bother about things that are golden. Speech is silver, and Pee-wee is Sterling. Let’s see, where was I? Oh, I know. I was just starting to keep still so Westy could talk. He said, “We’ll have a big rally and we’ll have signs up all around the field. All the scouts will have to be good and hungry.” “That’s easy!” Pee-wee shouted. Westy said, “We’ll have signs up all around saying A SCOUT IS HUNGRY, and things like that. We’ll have some poetry on big planks——” “And when Tony sees all that,” Connie Bennett piped up, “and finds that we won’t go over and buy any eats from him, why, then he’ll move his wagon over to the lot and we’ll have a chance to move the car. It’s a bully idea if Pee-wee doesn’t weaken and spoil it all.” “What are you talking about?” Pee-wee yelled. “I can go without anything to eat for—for an hour, if I have to!” So we decided that we’d force Tony to move his lunch wagon by the force of our appetites. Maybe you’ve seen exhibitions of things that scouts can do by the power of deduction and all that, and how they can do things by united strength, and everybody admits they can make a lot of noise when they sing together. But I bet you never saw what they can do by concerted appetite—that means all being hungry at the same time. You can move a house that way. Anyway, you can move a lunch wagon. CHAPTER VII—THE INVITATIONNow this is the way we planned it out. We decided that if we could get the way cleared as far as the Sneezenbunker land it would be easy from there, because the car would roll down the grade and maybe all the way across Cat-tail Marsh. Then we’d have to think of some scheme to get it to the river. “We won’t cross our bridges till we come to them,” Westy said. “We’re not going to take it across the river,” the kid shouted. “Crossing bridges is an expression,” I told him. “It’s the same as premises, only different.” So the next thing we had to think of was how to get the car past Slausen’s Auto Repair Shop, because repair shops can’t be moved like lunch wagons. And strategy doesn’t go with men who keep garages. So the next thing we did was to go and ask Mr. Slausen if he’d be willing to let us take down a few boards from his ramshackle old building just above where the tracks went through if we promised to put them up again. “Maybe my father’s going to get a flivver,” Pee-wee piped up, “and maybe if I run it I’ll have a smash-up, and I’ll get you to fix it.” But that didn’t go with Mr. Slausen. He said, very gruff like, “You kids better go home and study your lessons and not be trying to move railroad cars.” I said, “Scouts always keep their word, Mr. Slausen, and if we say we’ll put the boards back up again, we will.” He said, “Well, I guess we won’t take down any boards, so you better run along.” And then he started to talk to a man and didn’t pay any more attention to us. Just as we were going out Connie Bennett said, “Well, we’ll have to think of another way, that’s all. It’s got to be did somehow.” “Sure,” I said; “scouts can always think of a way.” Mr. Slausen must have heard us, for he turned around and shouted after us, very cross, “I want you youngsters to keep away from here. Understand?” Westy said, “Yes, sir.” “I don’t know anything we can do,” Dorry Benton said to me as we were going out. “We’ll think of a way,” I said; “don’t worry.” Now that’s all there was to our call on Mr. Slausen, and it wasn’t much, and nobody said anything important enough to remember, but what we said made a lot of trouble for us just the same. You’ll see. “All we’d have to do would be to move his vulcanizing table,” Westy said, “and we could run the car right through.” “Well, we should worry,” I said. “We’ll move Tony’s Lunch Wagon, vulcanizing table and all, and then we can think about the next step.” “What do you mean, vulcanizing table?” Pee-wee shouted. “The counter where he puts the inner tubes in doughnuts,” I told him. So then, as long as it was Saturday and we couldn’t do any more that day, we decided to go up to my house and send invitations to all the troops in the different towns near Bridgeboro. Pee-wee wanted to go around like Paul Revere and notify them all, but I said no, because I knew he’d only end up in some candy store miles and miles from home. This was the invitation we sent. It’s kind of crazy, but what did we care, because in my patrol we’re all crazy anyway. We ought to be called the Squirrels instead of the Silver Foxes, because we’re all nutty. Scouts, Attention!
Shoulder your trusty appetites and march to Bridgeboro on Saturday next, April 17th, to reËnforce your brother scouts of the 1st Bridgeboro troop in a daring enterprise. Come hungry! Don’t eat on the way! Rally in Downing’s lot near Bridgeboro Station at 10 A. M. Ask not the reason why Here’s but to do or die. Hark to the battle-cry Failure or apple pie! Come, valiant comrades! I guess when they got these invitations they thought we were all maniacs from Maine, hey? What did we care? Not in the least, quoth we. After we got the invitations mailed we decided to forget the moving problem and go to the moving pictures. After that we went to the station and sat in the car a little while and talked. As long as we were so near we thought we might as well go over to Bennett’s for cones, and as long as we were in there for cones we thought we might as well get some gumdrops. And as long as we were getting some gumdrops we thought we might as well get some molasses taffy for our young hero so as to stop him from talking. Believe me, that’s one thing I like. I don’t mean talking, I mean molasses taffy. I’m stuck on it. So is the tissue paper that comes around it. We got a nickel’s worth of lemondrops, too, because yellow is our patrol color. We’re always thinking of our patrol, that’s one good thing about us. CHAPTER VIII—RECONNOITERINGNow nothing happened the next week except going to school, and, gee whiz, there’s no adventure in that. The best thing about school is Saturday because there isn’t any. You can talk about Good Friday, but good Saturdays are good enough for me. Anyway, it’s funny how great men always get born on holidays, like Washington and Lincoln. That’s the thing I like best about those men—their birthdays. That’s one thing I’m thankful for about Thanksgiving, too; it always comes on a holiday. But one thing I hate, and that is hop-toads. So now that school is over for the week I’ll tell you about the big rally. Wasn’t that a quick week? Believe me, when I’m writing stories I take a hop, skip and a jump from one Saturday to another. Except in vacation. That rally was a big success. By ten o’clock on Saturday morning there were seven troops, not counting our own, in Downing’s lot ready to do or die. One came from East Bridgeboro, two came from Ennistown, one came from Northvale, one came from Little Valley, and two came from Sloan Hollow. There were seven troops and nineteen patrols. We have three patrols, so that makes twenty-two. There were a hundred and seventy-nine appetites altogether. They all wanted to know what was the big idea, so I got up on a grocery box and made a speech. General Blakeley inspiring his troops. Oh, boy! I said, “Scouts, that old railroad car over near the station belongs to us. It’s our trooproom. It has to be moved on this old track down to the river. Tony Giovettioegleirotti, who keeps that lunch wagon, has defied us. We bought twenty-four frankfurters from him and he wouldn’t move his wagon. So what are we going to do about it?” “Foil him!” Pee-wee shouted. “We haven’t got any tinfoil,” someone else hollered. “Listen,” I said; “everybody keep still. We’re going to have games and scout pace races and things, but nothing to eat. Every scout has to promise that no matter how hungry he is, he won’t go over and buy anything from Tony. I’m going to appoint a committee to go over there and keep smacking their lips, but——” “I’ll be on that committee!” Pee-wee shouted. “You’ll be on the ground if you don’t keep still!” I told him. “You fellows are supposed to go over there in small detachments, kind of, and hang around, and jingle the money in your pockets, and act as if you were hungry——” “I can act that way!” Pee-wee shouted. “Sure, just act natural,” I told him. “You’ve had practice enough being hungry.” “What’s the big idea?” somebody called out. “The big idea is to mobilize all our appetites,” I said. “When Tony sees this whole bunch of scouts—a hundred and seventy-nine appetites—and finds out that none of us is going to go over there and buy a single sandwich from him; when he finds that we spurn his pie, what will he do? He’ll move his wagon over here. That’s high strategy. It’s so high you have to use a stepladder to get up to it. The scout appetite, when it acts in, what d’you call it, unison can move anything!” “Sure it can!” they all yelled. “But how are you going to move the car?” some scout or other wanted to know. “You leave that to me,” I told him. “What you’re supposed to do is to get the way cleared. You’re supposed to re—what d’you call it?—reconnoiter around Tony’s and read the bill of fare that’s pasted on the door, and jingle your money and kind of maybe smack your lips and look like the poor starving children in Europe. But don’t buy anything! If you were to buy anything, even a single cheese sandwich, you’d be—you’d be Benedict Arnold——” “Did he eat cheese sandwiches?” one of the crowd wanted to know. “He was a traitor!” I shouted at him. “I don’t know what he used to eat. Shut up.” “He was in favor of Switzerland, he ate Swiss cheese sandwiches,” Brick Warner yelled. “Will you shut up?” I hollered. “It says in my History he swallowed his pride and wrote to Washington——” “Some appetite!” one of those fellows from East Bridgeboro yelled. “Now I don’t know what I was talking about,” I said. “You never did,” a scout shouted at me. I said, “Will you listen? If you all act in the right way and Tony finds that you’re not going to buy anything from him, he’ll move his wagon over here. Let him know you won’t buy anything except on scout territory. See? He’ll come across, you wait and see. All we have to do is hold out. The afternoon milk——” “We don’t want any milk,” they all began screaming. “What do you think this is? A baby show?” “I’m talking about a train,” I shot back at them; “a milk train. Didn’t you ever hear of a milk train?” “I never knew milk came from a milk train,” Hunt Manners shouted. “I thought it came from the milkman,” another fellow called. I said, “Oh, sure, it comes from the Milky Way, just the same as germs come from Germany. You’re all so bright you ought to have dimmers.” “Dinners——” Pee-wee yelled. “There you go again,” I told him. “No, not dinners—dimmers! Listen, will you? The afternoon milk train gets here——” “To-morrow morning,” a kid from Little Valley yelled. “It isn’t as slow as they are in Little Valley,” I said; “it’ll be here at about four-sixty——” “Five o’clock,” a scout piped up. “Right the first time,” I said. “How did you guess?” “What about it?” a lot of scouts wanted to know. “This about it,” I said; “if the tracks are clear by that time Mr. Jenson, who is engineer on that train, is going to push the car——” “He must be a strong man,” somebody shouted. “Oh, sure,” I told him; “he’s so strong he wasn’t even born on a weak day. Now will you keep still a minute? He’s going to push the car with the locomotive over to this field while the train is being——” “While it’s being milked,” another kid hollered. Honest, that crowd was so crazy that a crazy quilt would turn green with envy, I said. “Please listen and then everybody can talk at once. Your job is to inveigle——” “What do you mean, inveigle?” somebody hooted. “Keep still,” I said; “inveigle is Latin for luring; you know what that is, don’t you? Your job is to get that lunch wagon over to this field by fair means or rainy means or any old means——” “He doesn’t know what he means,” somebody yelled. “And I’ll do the rest,” I told them. “Only you have to have the tracks clear by five o’clock this afternoon.” “How are you going to get the car past that old garage?” somebody wanted to know. “That’s another story,” I said. “You should worry about how we’re going to do that. We’ll find a way. Scouts are resourceful. There’s more than one way to kill a cat——” “Scouts are supposed to be kind to animals,” one fellow shouted. “I’m not talking about a real cat,” I said; “that’s just an expression. I’m talking about Mr. Slaus——” Good night! Just then while I was talking I happened to look over to Slausen’s and there was Mr. Slausen standing in the back doorway watching us and listening. Gee whiz, I guess he heard everything I said. Anyway, I should worry, because I didn’t say anything that I was ashamed of. But just the same he had an awful funny look on his face. |