King. What noise is this? What villain dares, At this dread hoar, with feet and voice profane, Disturb our royal walls?

Ghost. One who defies Thy empty power to hurt him; [1] one who dares Walk in thy bedchamber.

[Footnote 1: Almanzor reasons in the same manner:

A ghost I'll be;
And from a ghost, you know, no place is free.
—Conquest of Granada.
]

King. Presumptuous slave! Thou diest.

Ghost. Threaten others with that word: [1] I am a ghost, and am already dead.

[Footnote 1: "The man who writ this wretched pun," says Mr D., "would have picked your pocket:" which he proceeds to shew not only bad in itself, but doubly so on so solemn an occasion. And yet, in that excellent play of Liberty Asserted, we find something very much resembling a pun in the mouth of a mistress, who is parting with the lover she is fond of:

Ul. Oh, mortal woe! one kiss, and then farewell. Irene. The gods have given to others to fare well. O! miserably must Irene fare.

Agamemnon, in the Victim, is full as facetious on the most solemn occasion—that of sacrificing his daughter:

Yes, daughter, yes; you will assist the priest;
Yes, you must offer up your vows for Greece,
]

King. Ye stars! 'tis well, Were thy last hour to come,
This moment had been it; [1] yet by thy shroud
I'll pull thee backward, squeeze thee to a bladder,
Till thou dost groan thy nothingness away.
Thou fly'st! 'Tis well. [Ghost retires.
[2] I thought what was the courage of a ghost!
Yet, dare not, on thy life—Why say I that,
Since life thou hast not?—Dare not walk again
Within these walls, on pain of the Red Sea.
For, if henceforth I ever find thee here,
As sure, sure as a gun, I'll have thee laid—

[Footnote 1:
I'll pull thee backwards by thy shroud to light,
Or else I'll squeeze thee, like a bladder, there,
And make thee groan thyself away to air.
—Conquest of Granada.

Snatch me, ye gods, this moment into nothing.
—Cyrus the Great.
]

[Footnote 2:
So, art thou gone? Thou canst no conquest boast.
I thought what was the courage of a ghost.
—Conquest of Granada.

King Arthur seems to be as brave a fellow as Almanzor, who says most heroically,

In spite of ghosts I'll on.
]

Ghost. Were the Red Sea a sea of Hollands gin,
The liquor (when alive) whose very smell
I did detest—did loathe—yet, for the sake
Of Thomas Thumb, I would be laid therein.

King. Ha! said you?

Ghost. Yes, my liege, I said Tom Thumb,
Whose father's ghost I am—once not unknown
To mighty Arthur. But, I see, 'tis true,
The dearest friend, when dead, we all forget.

King. 'Tis he—it is the honest Gaffer Thumb. Oh! let me press thee in my eager arms, Thou best of ghosts! thou something more than ghost!

Ghost. Would I were something more, that we again Might feel each other in the warm embrace. But now I have th' advantage of my king, [1] For I feel thee, whilst thou dost not feel me.

[Footnote 1: The ghost of Lausaria, in Cyrus, is a plain copy of this, and is therefore worth reading:

Ah, Cyrus!
Thou may'st as well grasp water, or fleet air,
As think of touching my immortal shade.
—Cyrus the Great.
]

King. But say, [1] thou dearest air, oh! say what dread, Important business sends thee back to earth?

[Footnote 1:
Thou better part of heavenly air.
—Conquest of Granada,.
]

Ghost. Oh! then prepare to hear—which but to hear
Is full enough to send thy spirit hence.
Thy subjects up in arms, by Grizzle led,
Will, ere the rosy-finger'd morn shall ope
The shutters of the sky, before the gate
Of this thy royal palace, swarming spread.
[1] So have I seen the bees in clusters swarm,
So have I seen the stars in frosty nights,
So have I seen the sand in windy days,
So have I seen the ghosts on Pluto's shore,
So have I seen the flowers in spring arise,
So have I seen the leaves in autumn fall,
So have I seen the fruits in summer smile,
So have I seen the snow in winter frown.

[Footnote 1: "A string of similes," says one, "proper to be hung up in the cabinet of a prince."]

King. D—n all thou hast seen!—dost thou, beneath the shape Of Gaffer Thumb, come hither to abuse me With similes, to keep me on the rack? Hence—or, by all the torments of thy hell, [1] I'll run thee through the body, though thou'st none.

[Footnote 1: This passage hath been understood several different ways by the commentators. For my part, I find it difficult to understand it at all. Mr Dryden says—

I've heard something how two bodies meet,
But how two souls join I know not.

So that, till the body of a spirit be better understood, it will be difficult to understand how it is possible to run him through it. ]

Ghost. Arthur, beware! I must this moment hence,
Not frighted by your voice, but by the cocks!
Arthur, beware, beware, beware, beware!
Strive to avert thy yet impending fate;
For, if thou'rt kill'd to-day,
To-morrow all thy care will come too late.