  Bow WowThis is so the entire world through, You imagine a maiden loves yough— Like the wind bends the bough, You are bent by the rough, Then left and forsaken—bough-wough. * * * Before marriage, With wondrous care, She seeks the mirror And bangs her hair. After marriage, With angry glare, She grabs her slipper And bangs her heir. * * * Ask Bob He KnowsA miss is as good as a mile, A kiss is as good as a smile, But four painted kings Are the beautiful things That are good for the other man’s pile. * * * The ballet’s not the drawing card That once it used to be. Ah! when it dies, may some good bard Indite its L. E. G. * * * “How do you like codfish balls?” I said to sister Jenny. “Well, really May, I couldn’t say, I have never been to any.” * * * Poor Lot’s wife turned to salt, alas! Her fate was most unkind. No doubt she only wished to see How hung her skirt behind. * * * The Power of the “Press”“Now, girls,” warned the Sunday School teacher, “I want to caution you against making friends with the new barber who has just opened a shop in the village. A friend of mine who knew him in the town where he was reared tells me he tries to make love to every girl he calls on.” “The girls in this burg are sure friendly,” confided the new barber to one of his patrons two days later. “Last night I took a stroll around the town and every girl I met smiled at me.” * * * The lightning flashed, the lightning crashed, The skies were rent asunder, With shriek and wail loud blew the gale, And then it rained like thunder. * * * Wall, I Calc’late!“Well, Si,” asked the justice of the peace of the lone constable, “what is this man charged with?” “Bigotry,” answered Si. “He’s got three wives.” “By gosh, Si,” exclaimed his honor, “where’s your education? That ain’t bigotry, that’s trigonometry!” * * * We’d Say SoWhen a young man with his arm around a girl lets a lighted cigarette fall inside his sport shirt and it feels like a drop of ice water, it is time either to propose or go home. * * * Female detectives should be good lookers. |
|
