MARJORIE'S VACATION was fast approaching its end; SHE and her friend MARIETTA, BY FORCE OF CIRCUMSTANCES, were conducting a flourishing TYPE-WRITING establishment, JUST BETWEEN THEMSELVES, at THE HOUSE ON CHERRY STREET, on THE SUNNY SIDE OF THE STREET, so that PASSERS-BY could see THE WAY UP, and they always allowed themselves, as a VACATION, LITTLE JOURNEYS of a fortnight's duration IN THAMESLAND or among THE ALPS.

Marjorie and her very best friend, BETTY STANDISH, were seated under THE PLUM TREE, but obviously, not at a time when the fruit was over-ripe, in THE GARDEN AT NO. 19, in that historic spot, CHANTREY LAND, as the old village of Norton, DERBYSHIRE, is called, having just been served with a second instalment of TEA, by TILLIE A MENNONITE MAID, who carried with her, THE GLEAM of LOCAL COLOR. The girls had just had an exceedingly trying two hours' visit from THE MAYOR'S WIFE, one of THE RAVENELS, and whose only TOPICS FOR CONVERSATION, IN A NUTSHELL, were invariably IN DEFENSE of her FAMILY; that she was following IN THE FOOTSTEPS OF THE BRONTES, and always ended with the statement that her BIG BROTHER, JOHN HENRY SMITH, THE ARCHDEACON, had ordered the removal of THE OLD PEABODY PEW, despite THE WARNING OF SEXTON MAGINNIS, that THE MONK'S TREASURE would not be found in that part of THE LONELY CHURCH of ST. JUDE'S and to-day, in addition to these thread-bare topics, she announced to her hearers, that ON GOING TO CHURCH, she had passed AT CLOSE RANGE, LORD LONDON, and his SISTER CARRIE, taking some STRAY BIRDS and TOY DOGS to the ABANDONED, HILL-TOP FARM (to see the DOG STARS) and finally, that her husband, SIR JOHN CONSTANTINE, had always been A SERVANT OF THE PUBLIC: in fact, with the Mayor's wife, it was always, I MYSELF and my family, and the young girls were at the point of collapse, when THE CRISIS came, and THE EGOTISTICAL I, lady took her departure.

BETTY had picked up the INEVITABLE, MRS. RORER'S COOKBOOK, for she liked THE FUN OF COOKING, in order to decide WHAT TO HAVE FOR DINNER, and with the HOPE of making an entire change in the SUNDAY NIGHT SUPPERS, for one can not subsist solely on BAKERS' BREAD or CREAM TOASTS.

"BETTY dear," said Marjorie, "I have come to the conclusion that THE CARD SYSTEM IN THE OFFICE is valueless to US."

"Of course it is, if you say so; what does Marietta think? but listen; is that MUSIC or someone in distress?"

For from HERE AND THERE came the sound of MUSIC; Oh! such NERVE-racking, BROKEN MUSIC; Marjorie, at once, hastened to THE GIANT'S GATE, the last remnant of Blunderbore castle, which once occupied the site of the present house, to find the guilty person, and there discovered a wretched-looking individual, with two still more wretched-looking ANIMALS, which the man called THE TEDDY BEARS.

Now, as Marjorie believed, that in THE TRAINING OF WILD ANIMALS, one should first secure their FRIENDSHIP, she, WITH THE BEST INTENTION, gave each of the bears a piece of COTTAGE PIE, and this is no joke, either; for bears LOVE this particular kind of pie; as a matter of fact, DIDO THE DANCING BEAR, considers it THE RIGHT STUFF, and much prefers it to the flesh of THE SALAMANDER, and in A SPIRIT OF MIRTH, she gave THE IMMORTAL CHARLATAN some SIX PENNY PIECES, to take his PETS to NORTHANGER ABBEY, to SERENADE the Mayor's wife, for, thought the young girl, harmless REVENGE is sweet, and moreover she may be AT DEATH'S DOOR, after the trying time she gave us.

"Betty, DEAR, I am so happy; we have had so many HAPPY DAYS and yet, I shall be glad to return to THE CITY OF PLEASURE; is it not strange that I, A MILLIONAIRE GIRL, should have to earn my own living, because of AN OPERA AND LADY GRASMERE? but what am I saying? THE DAWN OF A TO-MORROW is still far away; Horrors; there goes that fearful client of mine across THE LONG ROAD: I am frightened. WHAT IS COMING? what does she want here?"

"Marjorie, tell me, what is worrying you? let us be COMRADES IN ARMS; let me help you as I helped the FIVE LITTLE PEPPERS, IN THE LITTLE BROWN HOUSE; let me be THE CUSTODIAN of your secret."

"Yes, dear, I'll confide in you: I AM not, as you have supposed, THE DAUGHTER OF ANDERSON CROW; I truly believe I am Lord Cammerleigh's CHILD, that I have a sister, who is none other than CELESTE, THE PRIMADONNA at the Gaiety Theatre; and from what I have gathered from a WOMAN, the same woman who just entered THE DEVIL'S GARDEN, who comes to our office to have senseless letters type-written and apparently to no purpose, so far as I can understand; I say, I believe my FATHER does not know where we are and more than that, dare not look for us on account, I say, of what this wretched woman calls THAT AFFAIR AT ELIZABETH: a question of WATCHFUL WAITING; it is certainly A DESPERATE CONSPIRACY, and I shall not rest until THE CONSPIRATORS are UNMASKED AT LAST; but no more to-night: WHAT'S THE USE, you are CHILLY: put on THE GREENMANTLE and we will stroll along PIDGIN ISLAND, as far as DARK HOLLOW to see if our little favorite the PUFFINUS EYERMANI is still there, and TO-MORROW we will go to SHREWSBURY to see JOEY AT THE FAIR feeding THE DRAGON."