FOOLISH FRED

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One must think for himself after all, for no instructions can be completely definite.

Fred was a little boy who always did what his mother told him to do, but because he did not “put on his thinking cap” he was called “Foolish Fred.” His mother said: “My son, go to the store and buy me a dozen eggs.”

“Yes, mother,” said Fred, and away he went. He put the eggs in the pockets of his trousers and sat down upon a stone. Of course we know what happened. His mother said:

“My son, you should not have done so; you should have put the eggs in a basket and covered them with cool green leaves.”

Next day his mother sent him to buy some needles. He put them in a basket, and of course we know they did not stay there.

“Mother,” said Fred, “I did just as you told me, but the silly things fell through the basket.”

“Oh, my son!” said his mother, “you should not have done so, you should have stuck the needles in the lapels of your coat.”

Next day Fred went to the store to buy a pound of butter. He stuck the butter carefully in the lapels of his coat; being tired he sat on a stone to rest and fell asleep. His mother threw up her hands when she saw melted butter all over him.

“Mother,” said Fred, “I did just as you told me, but the silly sun shone so hot that the butter melted.”

“My son,” said his mother, “you should have put it in a bucket and put the lid on securely.”

The following day she sent Fred to market to buy a pig. He purchased a nice, fat pig, put it in a little bucket and started home. The pig objected to such close quarters, kicked the lid off the bucket and ran away. He told his mother he did just as she told him, but the silly pig ran away.

“My son,” said his mother, “you should have tied one foot with a strong rope and led him home.”

She sent Fred to the Intelligence Office to hire a servant girl. Seeing a strong Irish girl, he stepped up behind her, took a rope from his pocket and tied it around her ankle, thus trying to lead her home with him. The girl indignantly jerked the rope away, boxed his ears soundly, and went away.

“Mother,” said Fred, “I did just as you told me.”

“My son,” said his mother, “you should not have done so. You should have raised your cap, spoken to her kindly, placed some money in her hand, and she would have come with you gladly.”

The following day she sent Fred to buy a cow. He selected a cow, raised his hat, spoke to her kindly, and stooping down tried to place some money in her right hoof. The angry cow lowered her head, and lifting Fred upon her horns tossed him so high that he only stopped when he reached the moon.


                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           

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