Oh, why are you so far from home,
On this cold night abroad to roam?
Has your behavior been correct?
I am unwilling to suspect.
Walk in. Don’t stand; pray take a seat;
A stranger I will always greet.
You praise my house and call it splendid,
And praise its inmates, too.
If a mere compliment’s intended,
Civility’s your due.
I’ll give you shelter for the night,
And view you by the morning light;
If, on acquaintance, you should prove
Worthy of Madam Flora’s love,
Then grandma will not plead in vain,
Nor cousin H——, with her sweet strain.
Miss Gillyflower will be delighted,
To take in wanderers benighted;
So I consent; call this your home,
Nor ever from your goddess roam;
At her command, among her flowers,
Spend all your thoughtless, playful hours,
Contrasting with her vivid greens,
Your white robe, which transparent seems.
Though music has no charms for me,
I’m not opposed to others’ glee:
You and your friend may dance and sing,
And welcome the return of spring;
And when the General returns,
And gratitude each bosom warms,
Thank him for all the good I’ve done—
For he and I, you know, are one.
Then be content; no boat nor wherry,
Shall take you t’other side the ferry.