  MEDICAL FACTS AND STATISTICS. HOW MANY.—WHO THEY ARE.—HOW THEY DIE.—HOW MUCH RUM THEY CONSUME.—HOW THEY LIVE.—OLD AGE.—WHY WE DIE.—GET MARRIED.—OLD PEOPLE’S WEDDING.—A GOOD ONE.—THE ORIGIN OF THE HONEYMOON.—A SWEET OBLIVION.—HOLD YOUR TONGUE!—MANY MEN, MANY MINDS.—“ALLOPATHY.”—LOTS OF DOCTORS.—THE ITCH MITE.—A HORSE CAR RIDE.—KEEP COOL!—KNICKKNACKS.—HUMBLE PIE.—INCREASE OF INSANITY.—A COOL STUDENT.—HOW TO GET RID OF A MOTHER-IN-LAW. The Population. There are on the earth about one billion of inhabitants. They speak four thousand and sixty-four languages. Only one person in a thousand reaches his allotted years,—threescore and ten. Between the ages of sixteen and forty-five, there are more females than males. Lawyers live the longest, doctors next, ministers least of the three professions. There are more insane among farmers than of any other laborers. Caucasians live longer than Malays, Hindoos, Chinese, or Negroes. Light-skinned, dark-haired persons with dark or blue eyes live the longest. Red or florid complexioned, gray or hazel eyes, shortest. One half of the people die before the age of seventeen; one fourth before seven. About 91,824 die each day; one every second. Tall men live longer than short ones. (No pun.) Short women live longer than tall ones. Three quarters of the adults are married. Births and deaths are more frequent by night than day. The cost of the clergy of the United States is six million dollars yearly. Lawyers receive about thirty-five million dollars. Crime costs the United States about nineteen million dollars. Tobacco one hundred and fifty million dollars. (That’s crime, also.) Liquors one billion four hundred and eighty-three million four hundred and ninety-one thousand eight hundred and sixty-five dollars. (Text-book of Temperance, p. 188.) Opium is eaten in the world by one hundred and twenty million people. Hasheesh is used by some twenty millions. The temperate live longer than the intemperate. Self-destruction. A GERMAN BEER GIRL. The Hon. Francis Gillette, in a speech in Hartford, Conn., in 1871, said that there was “in Connecticut, on an average, one liquor shop to every forty voters, and three to every Christian church. In this city, as stated in the Hartford Times, recently, we have five hundred liquor shops, and one million eight hundred and twenty-five thousand dollars were, last year, paid for In New London, report says, the young men are falling into drinking habits as never before. So in New Haven, Bridgeport, and the other cities and large places of the state. “The pulse of a person in health beats about seventy strokes a minute, and the ordinary term of life is about seventy years. In these seventy years, the pulse of a temperate person beats two billion five hundred and seventy-four million four hundred and forty thousand times. If no actual disorganization should happen, a drunken person might live until his pulse beat this number of times; but by the constant stimulus of ardent spirits, or by pulse-quickening food, or tobacco, the pulse becomes greatly accelerated, and the two billion five hundred and seventy-four million four hundred and forty thousand pulsations are performed in little more than half the ordinary term of human life, and life goes out in forty or forty-five years, instead of seventy. This application of numbers is given to show that the acceleration of those forces diminishes the term of human life.” “In New York, Mr. Greeley states that ‘a much larger proportion of adult males in the state drink now than did in 1840-44.’ After speaking of the adverse demonstrations all over the country, he adds, ‘I cannot recall a single decisive, cheering success, to offset these many reverses.’ “Massachusetts is moving to build an asylum for her twenty-five thousand drunkards. Lager beer brewers at Boston Highlands have three millions of dollars invested in the business, manufactured four hundred and ninety-five thousand barrels last year, and paid a tax of half a million to the general government. The city of Chicago, last year, received into her treasury one hundred and ten thousand dollars for the sale of indulgences to sell intoxicating drinks. How they live. In one block near the New Bowery, New York, are huddled fifteen hundred and twenty persons. Eight hundred and twelve are Irish, two hundred and eighteen Germans, one hundred and eighty-nine Poles, one hundred and eighty-six Italians, thirty-nine Negroes, sixty-four French, two Welsh, only ten American. Of these, ten hundred and sixty-two are Catholic, two hundred and eighty-seven Jews, etc. There are twenty grog-shops and fifty degraded women. Of six hundred and thirteen children, but one hundred and sixty-six went to school. New York city consumes nine thousand six hundred dollars’ worth of flour a day (twelve hundred barrels), and uses ten thousand dollars’ worth of tobacco per day. Old Age. We have mentioned some physicians who lived to an extreme old age—the Doctors Meade; one lived to be one hundred and forty-eight years and nine months. Thomas Parr, an English yeoman, lived to the remarkable age of one hundred and fifty-three years; and even then Dr. Harvey, who held a post mortem on the body, found no internal indication of decay. One of his descendants lived to be one hundred and twenty. The Rev. Henry Reade, There was a female in Lancashire, whose death was noticed in the Times, called the “Cricket of the Hedge,” who lived to be one hundred and forty-one years, less a few days. The Countess Desmond arrived at the remarkable age of one hundred and forty years. One might suppose the allotted threescore and ten years a sufficiently long time to satisfy one to live in poverty in this world; but Henry Jenkins lived and died at the age of one hundred and sixty-nine years, in abject penury. He was a native of Yorkshire, and died in 1670. Why we die. But few of the human race die of old age. Besides the thousand and one diseases flesh is heir to, and the disease which Mrs. O’Flannagan said her husband died of, viz., “Of a Saturday ’tis that poor Mike died,” very many die of disappointment. More fret out. Mr. Beecher said, “It is the fretting that wears out the machinery; friction, not the real wear.” “Choked with passion” is no chimera; for passion often kills the unfortunate possessor of an irritable temper, sometimes suddenly. Care and over-anxiety sweep away thousands annually. Let us see how long a man should live. The horse lives twenty-five years; the ox fifteen or twenty; the lion about twenty; the dog ten or twelve; the rabbit eight; the guinea-pig six or seven years. These numbers all bear a similar proportion to the time the animal takes to grow to its full size. But man, of all animals, is the one that seldom comes up to his average. He ought to live a hundred years, according to this physiological law, for five times twenty are one hundred; but instead of that, he scarcely reaches, on the average, four times his growing period; the cat six “Age dims the lustre of the eye, and pales the roses on beauty’s cheek; while crows’ feet, and furrows, and wrinkles, and lost teeth, and gray hairs, and bald head, and tottering limbs, and limping, most sadly mar the human form divine. But dim as the eye is, pallid and sunken as may be the face of beauty, and frail and feeble that once strong, erect, and manly body, the immortal soul, just fledging its wings for its home in heaven, may look out through those faded windows as beautiful as the dewdrop of summer’s morning, as melting as the tears that glisten in affection’s eye, by growing kindly, by cultivating sympathy with all human kind, by cherishing forbearance towards the follies and foibles of our race, and feeding, day by day, on that love to God and man which lifts us from the brute, and makes us akin to angels.” Get Married. There’s nothing like it. Get married early. The majority of men save nothing, amount to nothing, until they are married. Don’t get married too much. There was a man up in court recently for being too much married. A well-matched, temperate couple grow old, to be sure, but they “grow old gracefully.” When people venture the second and third time in the “marriage lottery,” it is fair to presume the first experience was a happy one. Here is a case:— An Old People’s Wedding. “Married, in Gerry, Chautauqua County, New York, November 6, 1864, by Elder Jonathan Wilson, aged eighty-eight, Silvanus Fisher, a widower, aged eighty-two, to Priscilla Cowder, a widow, aged seventy-six, all of Gerry.” What were their habits? Did they drink, smoke, or chew? Did they dissipate in any way? Who will tell us how these aged people managed to keep up their youthful spirits so long?. We should like to publish the recipe for “the benefit of whom it concerns.” A good One. A Maryland paper tells the story of a marriage under difficulties, where first the bridegroom failed to appear at the appointed time through bashfulness, and was discovered, pursued, and only “brought to” with a shot gun. The bride AN INDIGNANT BRIDE. The Honeymoon. The origin of the honeymoon is not generally known. The Saxons long and long ago got up the delightful occasion. Amongst the ancient Saxons and Teutons a beverage was made of honey and water, and sometimes flavored with mulberries. This drink was used especially at weddings and the after festivals. These festivals were kept up among the nobility sometimes for a month—“monath.” The “hunig monath” was thus established, and the next moon after the marriage was called the honeymoon. Alaric, about the fifth century king of the Saxons and Western Goths, is said to have actually died on his wedding night from drinking too freely of the honeyed beverage,—at least he died before morning,—and it certainly would seem to be a charitable inference to draw, since he partook very deeply of the “festive drink.” It was certainly a sweet oblivion, “yet it should be a warning to posterity, as showing that even bridegrooms may make too merry.” Dr. Blanchet recently read a paper before the Academy of Science, Paris, relative to some cases of “long sleep,” or lethargic slumber. One of them related to a lady twenty years of age, who took a sleeping fit during her honeymoon, which lasted fifty days. “During this long period a false front tooth had to be taken out in order to introduce milk and broth into her mouth. This was her only food; she remained motionless, insensible, and all her muscles were in a state of contraction. Her pulse was low, her breathing scarcely perceptible; there was no evacuation, no leanness; her complexion was florid “The report did not say whether the husband was pleased or not with her long silence.” There is too much talk in the world about woman’s “jaw.” As for me, give me the woman who can talk; the faster and more sense the better. “Many Men, Many Minds.” There are in the United States about thirty-five thousand physicians. Of this number about five thousand are Homeopathists, and nearly thirty thousand are what is wrongly termed Allopathists. Allopathic—Allopathy.—The dictionaries say this term means “the employment of medicines in order to produce effects different from those resulting from the disease—a term invented by Hahnemann to designate the ordinary practice as opposed to Homeopathy.” The term is not acknowledged by physicians, only as a nick, or false one, given by the Hahnemannites to regular practitioners. “Never allow yourself,” says Professor Wood, author of the American or U. S. Dispensatory, “to be called an Allopath. It is an opprobrious name, given by the enemies of regular physicians.” It is, moreover, very inappropriate, for we give other remedies besides those of counter-irritation; as, for instance, an emetic for nausea. The first regular physicians of Boston were Dr. John Walon, Dr. John Cutler, and Dr. Zabdal Boylston. Some of the earlier doctors had acted in the double capacity of minister and physician, as previously mentioned. Massachusetts has now twelve hundred “regular” doctors, three hundred, or more, homeopathists, and some hundred botanics, etc. Boston has three hundred and twenty “allopathics,” about fifty homeopathists, a dozen “eclectics,” one Surely some of them must needs “scratch for a living;” yet there is always room for a first-class practitioner anywhere. The Itch Mite. As we are speaking of “scratching” we will mention the itch mite, which we propose to give particular—sulphur—in this chapter. THE ITCH MITE. The animal which makes one love to scratch is from one sixteenth to one seventeenth of an inch in length, and may be seen with the naked eye if the eye is sharp enough to “see it.” The luxury of scratching is said to greatly compensate for the filthy disease known as the “itch.” Dr. Ellitson says “a Scotch king—viz., James I.—is alleged to have said that no subject deserved to have the itch—none but Royalty—on account of the great pleasure derived from scratching.” The king was said to have spoken from experience. In these days of filthy horse-cars (we are speaking of New York), this fact may be interesting to passengers. A HORSE-CAR RIDE. How to keep Cool. 1. Don’t fan yourself. Those persons who are continually using a fan are ever telling you “how awful hot it is.” Look at their faces! Red hot! Human nature is a contrary jade. The more you blow with a fan that warm air on your face, the more blood it calls to that part, and the more blood the more heat. So don’t fan. 2. Don’t drink ice-water. Cold, iced water is excellent for a fever, perhaps (similia similibus curantur); but if you drink it down when you are merely warm from outward heat, you get up an internal fever, which is increased in proportion as you take that unnatural beverage into the stomach. I drink tea, chocolate, coffee. Some persons cannot drink the latter. Then don’t; but take black tea; not too strong, nor scalding hot. If very thirsty after, take small quantities of cold (not iced) water. Don’t take ice-cream. It increases heat and thirst. Soda-water is less objectionable. Sprinkling the carpet with water several times a day keeps the room cooler. If there are small children or invalids, this may be objectionable. 3. With the hand apply cool or tepid water to the entire 4. Do not sleep in any garment at night worn during the day. Have your windows open as wide as you will, and bars to keep out flies and mosquitos. Keep a sheet over the limbs, to exclude the hot air from the surface. 5. Eat fruits, and but little meats. You will find, as a general rule, all ripe fruit healthy in its season. I have lived in the South several years, and know whereof I affirm. 6. And above all—keep cool! Knickknacks. More Truth than Poetry.—The following conversation between a colored prisoner and a temperance lecturer who was in search of facts to fortify his positions and illustrate his subject, explains itself:— “What brought you to prison, my colored friend?” “Two constables, sah.” “Yes; but I mean, had intemperance anything to do with it?” “Yes, sah; dey wuz bofe uv ’em drunk, sah.” Humble Pie.—The humble pie of former times was a pie made out of the “umbles” or entrails of the deer; a dish of the second table, inferior, of course, to the venison pastry which smoked upon the dais, and therefore not inexpressive of that humiliation which the term “eating humble pie” now painfully describes. The “umbles” of the deer are usually the perquisites of the gamekeeper. Increase of Insanity.—Insanity in England is rapidly increasing. In 1861, when the population was 19,860,701, Error of Diagnosis.—“Doctor,” said a hard-looking, brandy-faced customer a few days ago to a physician! “Doctor, I’m troubled with an oppression and uneasiness about the breast. What do you suppose the matter is?” “All very easily accounted for,” said the physician; “you have water on the chest.” “Water! Come, that’ll do very well for a joke; but how could I get water on my chest when I haven’t touched a drop in twenty years? If you had said brandy, you might have hit it.” Ferocity of a Wasp.—A lady at Grantham observed a wasp tearing a common fly to pieces on the breakfast table. When first noticed the wasp grasped the fly firmly, and had cut off a leg and a wing, so that its rescue would have been no kindness. The wasp was covered with a basin until it should receive a murderer’s doom; and when the basin was removed for its execution, nothing was seen of the fly but the wings and a number of little black pieces. Madame Regina Dal Cin, a famous surgeon of Austria, having performed one hundred and fifty successful operations in the city hospital at Trieste, was rewarded by the municipal authorities with a letter of thanks and a purse of gold. A Cool Student.—In the Quartier Latin, Paris, a student was lying in bed, to which he had gone supperless, trying to devise some means to raise the wind; suddenly, in the dead of night, his reveries were disturbed by a “click.” Stealthily THE BURGLAR AND STUDENT. How to get rid of a Mother-in-Law.—During the recent small-pox excitement in Indianapolis, an excited individual rushed into a telegraph office, hurriedly wrote a despatch, and handed the same to the able and talented clerk. The message bore the startling intelligence that the sender’s wife was A Dying Request.—A kind physician living near Boston, wishing to smooth the last hours of a poor woman whom he was attending, asked her if there was anything he could do for her before she died. The poor soul, looking up, replied, “Doctor, I have always thought I should like to have a glass butter-dish before I died.” |
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