EXCELLENT TESTIMONIAL FROM MY BISHOP—MY RETREAT—GRAND VICAR SAURIN AND HIS ASSISTANT, REV. M. GRANGER—GRAND VICAR DUNN WRITES ME ABOUT THE NEW STORM PREPARED BY THE JESUITS—BISHOP SMITH, ORDERS ME BACK TO DUBUQUE—HE REJECTS THE ACTS OF SUBMISSION—THE VOICE OF GOD—THE BISHOP REQUIRES A NEW ACT OF SUBMISSION—I REFUSE IT—VISION—CHRIST OFFERS HIMSELF AS A GIFT—I AM FORGIVEN, RICH HAPPY AND SAVED—BACK TO MY PEOPLE. Bishop Smith had fulfilled his promise in addressing to me a testimonial letter, which would show to both friends and foes that the most honorable and lasting peace between us was to succeed the deplorable years of strife through which we had just passed. I read it with grand vicar Dunn, who was not less pleased than I with the kind expressions of esteem towards my people and myself with which it was filled. I had never had a document in which my private and public character were so kindly appreciated. I put it in my portfolio as the most precious treasure I had ever possessed, and my gratitude to the bishop who had written such friendly lines, was boundless. I, at once, addressed a short letter to thank and bless him: and I requested him to pray for me during the happy days of retreat I was to spend at the monastery of St. Joseph. The venerable grand vicar Saurin, and his assistant, Rev. M. Granger, received me as two Christian gentlemen receive a brother priest, and I may say that, during my stay in the monastery, they constantly overwhelmed me with the most sincere marks of kindness. I found in them both the very best types of priests of Rome. A volume, and not a chapter, would be required, were I to tell what I saw there of the zeal, devotedness, ability and marvellous success of their labors. Suffice it to say, 1st. When some of his inferior monks came to speak to him, they had to kneel and prostrate themselves as if he had been a god, and they had to remain in that humble and degrading posture, till, with a sign of his hand or a word from his lips, he told them to rise. 2nd. Though he promised to the numerous Protestant parents, who entrusted their boys and girls to his care for their education, never to interfere with their religion, he was, nevertheless, incessantly proselytizing them. Several of his Protestant pupils were received in the Church of Rome, and renounced the religion of their fathers, in my presence, on the eve of Easter of that year. While, as a priest, I rejoiced in the numerous conquests of my church over her enemies, in all our colleges and nunneries, I objected to the breach of promise, always connected with those conversions. I, however, then thought, as I think to-day, that a Protestant who takes his children to a Roman Catholic priest or nun for their education, had no religion. It is simply an absurdity to promise that we will respect the religion of a man who has none. How can we respect that which does not exist? As a general thing, there are too few people who understand the profound meaning of our Saviour’s words to his disciples: “Come ye yourselves apart into a desert place and rest a while.” These words, uttered after the apostles had gathered themselves together unto Jesus, and told him all things both what they had done and taught, ought to receive more attention, on the part of those whom the Son of God has chosen to continue the great work of preaching his Gospel to the world. I had never before so well realized how good it was to be alone with Christ, and My principal occupation was to read and meditate on the Gospel. That divine book had never been so precious to me as since God had directed me to put it as the fundamental stone of my faith in the act of submission I had just given to my bishop: and my church had never been so dear to me as since she had accepted that conditional submission. I felt a holy pride and joy at having finally silenced the voice of the enemy which, so often, troubled my faith by crying to my soul: “Do you not see that in your Church of Rome, you do not follow the Word of God, but only the lying traditions of men.” My church, through her bishop, had just given me what I considered an infallible assurance of the contrary, by accepting the document signed by me and my people, where we had clearly said that we would never obey any authority or any superior, except when “their orders or doctrines would be based upon the Gospel of Christ.” My soul was rejoicing in those thoughts, when, on the 5th of April (Monday after Easter) grand vicar Saurin handed me a letter from Mr. Dunn, telling me that a new storm, brought by the Jesuits, and more formidable than the past ones, was about to break on me; that I had to prepare for new and more serious conflicts than I had ever experienced. The next morning, Mr. Saurin handed me another letter from the Bishop of Dubuque, and with a sympathy which I will never forget, he said: “I am sorry to see that you are not at the end of your troubles, as you expected. “Bishop Smith orders you back to Dubuque with words which are far from being friendly.” But, strange to say, such bad news, which would have saddened and discouraged me, in other circumstances, left me perfectly calm and cheerful on that day. In my dear Gospel, which had been my daily bread, the last eight days, I had found the helmet for my head, the breastplate and the shield to protect me, and the unconquerable sword with which to fight. When, on my way back to Dubuque, I stopped at Chicago, to know from my faithful friend, Mr. Dunn, the cause of the new storm. He said: “You remember how grand vicar Mailloux was displeased with the conditional submission you had given to the bishop. As soon as we had left him, he sent the young priest who is with him, to the Jesuits of Chicago, to tell them that the authority of the church and of the bishop would be forever lost, if Chiniquy were allowed to submit on such a condition. He wanted them to notice that it was not to the authority of the bishops and the church you had submitted; but only to the authority of the Bible. The Jesuits were of the same mind. They immediately sent to Dubuque, and said to the bishop: ‘Do you not see that Chiniquy is a disguised Protestant; that he has deceived you by presenting you such an act of submission. Does not your lordship see that Chiniquy has not submitted himself to your authority, but to the authority of his Bible alone? Do you not fear that the whole body of the bishops and the Pope himself will condemn you for having fallen into the trap prepared by that disguised Protestant?’ “Our administrator, though a good man when left to himself, is weak, and like soft wax, can be manipulated in every way. “The Jesuits who want to rule the priests and the church with an iron rod, and who are aiming to change the Pope and the bishops into the most heartless tyrants, have advised the administrator to force you to give an unconditional act of submission. It is not the Word of God which must rule us now, it is the old Jupiter, who is coming back to rule us under the name of a modern divinity, called ‘the authority of the bishops.’ The administrator and the Jesuits themselves, have telegraphed your submission to several bishops, who have unanimously answered that it must be rejected, and another given, without condition, requested from you. You were evidently too correct, when you told me the other day, that your act of submission was too good for the bishops and the Pope. What will you do?” “Very well, very well,” he answered, “May God help you!” H. That same Mr. Dunn was also excommunicated, not long after, by his bishop, and died after publicly refusing to be relieved from that sentence. After warmly shaking hands with me, I left to take the train for Dubuque, where I arrived, next morning. I went immediately to the bishop’s palace. I found him in the company of a Jesuit, and I felt myself as a poor helpless ship between two threatening icebergs. “Your lordship wants to see me again,” I said. “Yes, sir, I want to see you again,” he answered. “What do you want from me my lord?” I replied. “Have you the testimonial letter I addressed to you, at Chicago, last week?” “Yes, my lord, I have it with me.” “Will you please show it to me,” he replied. “With pleasure, here it is,” and I handed him the precious document. As soon as he had assured himself that it was the very letter in question, he ran to the stove and threw it into the fire. I felt so puzzled at the action of my bishop, that I remained almost paralyzed; but soon, coming to myself, I ran, to save from the flames, that document which was more valuable and precious to me than all the gold of California, but it was too late. It was in ashes. I turned to the bishop and said: “How can you take from me a document which is my property, and destroy it without my permission?” He answered me with an impudence that cannot be expressed on paper: “I am your superior, and have no account to give you.” I replied: “Yes, my lord, you are my superior indeed. You are a great bishop in our church, and I am nothing but a poor miserable priest. “But, there is an Almighty God in heaven, who is as much above you as he is above me. That great God has granted me “Have you come here to lecture me?” replied the bishop. “No, my lord, I did not come to lecture you; I come at your command, but I want to know if it was to insult me as you have just done that you requested me to come here again.” “I ordered you to come here again because you deceived me the last time you were here,” he answered: “you gave me an act of submission which you know very well is not an act of submission. I accepted it then, but I was mistaken; I reject it to-day.” I answered: “How can you say that I deceived you? The document I presented you, is written in good, plain English. It is there, on your table, I see it: you read it twice, and understood it well. If you were deceived by its contents, you deceived yourself. You are, then, a self-deceiver and you cannot accuse me of having deceived you.” He then took the document, read it slowly: and when at the words, “we submit ourselves to your authority, according to the Word of God as we find it in the Gospel of Christ,” he stopped and said: “What do you mean by this?” I answered, “I mean what you see there. I mean that neither I nor my people will ever submit ourselves to anybody, except according to the eternal laws of truth, justice and holiness of God, as we find them expressed in the Bible.” He angrily answered, “Such language on your part is sheer Protestantism. I cannot accept such a conditional submission from any priest.” Then, again, I seemed to hear the mysterious voice, “Do you not see that in your Church of Rome, you do not follow the Word of God, but the lying traditions of men?” Thanks be to God, I did not silence that voice in that solemn hour. An ardent, though silent prayer, went from the bottom of my heart to the mercy seat. With all the fervor of my soul I said: “Oh my God! speak, speak again to thy poor servant, and grant me the grace to follow thy Holy Word!” I then said to the bishop: Taking then a more subdued and polite tone, the bishop said: “I hope, Mr. Chiniquy, that, as a good priest, you do not want to rebel against your bishop, and that you will give me the act of submission I ask from you. Take away these ‘Words of God,’ ‘Gospel of Christ,’ and ‘Bible,’ from your present document, and I will be satisfied.” “But, my lord, with my people, I have put these words because we want to obey only the bishops who follow the Word of God. We want to submit only to the church which respects and follows the Gospel of Christ.” In an irritated manner, he quickly answered: “Take away from your act of submission, those ‘Words of God,’ and ‘Gospel of Christ,’ and ‘Bible!’ or I will punish you as a rebel.” “My lord,” I replied, “those expressions are there to show us and to the whole world, that the Word of God, the Gospel of Christ and the Bible, are the fundamental stones of our holy church. If we reject those precious stones, on what foundations will our church and our faith rest?” He answered angrily: “Mr. Chiniquy, I am your superior, I do not want to argue with you: You are my inferior, your business is to obey me. Give me, at once, an act of submission in which you will simply say that you and your people will submit yourselves to my authority, and promise to do anything I will bid you.” I calmly answered: “What you ask me is not an act of submission, it is an act of adoration. I do absolutely refuse to give it.” “If it be so, sir,” he answered, “you can no longer be a Roman Catholic priest.” I raised my hands to heaven, and cried with a loud voice: “May God Almighty be forever blessed.” I took my hat and left to go to my hotel. When alone, in my room, I locked the door and fell on my knees, to consider, in There, on my knees, and alone with God, it was evident to me that the voice which had so often troubled and shaken my faith, was the voice of my merciful God who wanted to save me. It was the voice of my dear Saviour, who wanted to bring me out of the ways of perdition in which I was walking. And I had tried so often to silence that voice! “My God! my God!” I cried, “The Church of Rome is not thy church. To obey the voice of my conscience, which is thine, I gave it up. When I had the choice between giving up the Church or the Bible, I did not hesitate. I could not give up thy Holy Word. I have given up Rome! But, O Lord, where is thy church? Oh! speak!! where must I go to be saved?” For more than one hour, I cried to God in vain; no answer came. In vain, I cried for a ray of light to guide me. The more I prayed and wept, the greater was the darkness which surrounded me! I then felt as if God had forsaken me, and an unspeakable distress was the result of that horrible thought. To add to my distress, the thought flashed across my mind that by giving up the Church of Rome, I had given up the church of my dear father and mother, of my brothers, my friends and my country. In fact all that was near and dear to me! I hope that none of my readers will ever experience what it Then I felt that an implacable war was to be declared against me, which would end only with my life. The Pope, the bishops and priests, all over the world, would denounce and curse me. They would attack and destroy my character, my name and my honor, in their press, from their pulpit and in their confessionals, where the man they strike can never know whence the blow is coming! Almost in despair, I tried to think of some one who would come to my help in that formidable conflict, but could find none. Every one of the millions of Roman Catholics were bound to curse me. My best friends—my own people—even my own brothers, were bound to look upon me with horror as an apostate, a vile outcast! Could I hope for help or protection from Protestants? No! for my priestly life had been spent in writing and preaching against them. In vain would I try to give an idea of the desolation I felt, when that thought struck my mind. Forsaken by God and man, what would become of me? Where would I go when out of that room? Expelled with contempt by my former Roman Catholic friends; repulsed with still more contempt by Protestants; where could I go to hide my shame and drag my miserable existence? How could I go again into that world where there was no more room for me; where there was no hand to press mine; none to smile upon me! Life suddenly became to me an unbearable burden. My brain seemed to be filled with burning coals. I was losing my mind. Yea, death, an instant death seemed to me the greatest blessing in that awful hour! and, will I say it? Yes! I took my knife to cut my throat and put an end to my miserable existence! But my merciful God, who wanted only to humble me, by showing me my own helplessness, stopped my hand, and the knife fell on the floor. Though I felt the pangs of that desolation for more than In that very instant, I remembered that I had my dear New Testament with me, which I used then, as now, to carry everywhere. The thought flashed across my mind that I would find in that divine book the answer to my prayer, and light to guide me through that dark night to that house of refuge and salvation, after which my soul was ardently longing. With a trembling hand and a praying heart, I opened the book at random; but, no! not I, my God himself opened it for me. My eyes fell on these words: “YE ARE BOUGHT WITH A PRICE. BE NOT YE THE SERVANTS OF MEN.” (1 Cor., 7:23.) Strange to say! Those words came to my mind, more as a light than an articulated sound. They, suddenly, but most beautifully and powerfully, gave me, as much as a man can know it, the knowledge of the great mystery of a perfect salvation through Christ alone. They, at once, brought a great and delightful calm to my soul. I said to myself: “Jesus has bought me, then I am His; for when I have bought a thing, it is mine, absolutely mine! Jesus has bought me! I, then, belong to him! He alone has a right over me. I do not belong to the bishops, to the Popes; not even to the church, as I have been told till now. I belong to Jesus, and to him alone! His Word must be my guide, and my light by day and by night. Jesus has bought me, I said again to myself; then He has saved me! and if so, I am saved, perfectly saved, for ever saved! for Jesus cannot save me by half. Jesus is my God; the works of God are perfect. My salvation must, then, be a perfect salvation! But how has he saved me? What price has he paid I, then, said to myself again: “If Jesus has perfectly saved me by shedding his blood on the cross, I am not saved as I have thought and preached till now, by my penances, my prayers to Mary and the saints, my confessions and indulgences, not even by the flames or purgatory. In that instant, all things which, as a Roman Catholic, I had to believe to be saved—all the mummeries by which the poor Roman Catholics are so cruelly deceived, the chaplets, indulgences, scapularies, auricular confession, invocation of the virgin, holy water, masses, purgatory, etc., given as means of salvation, vanished from my mind as a huge tower, when struck at the foundation, crumbles to the ground. Jesus alone remained in my mind as the Saviour of my soul! Oh! what joy I felt at this simple, but sublime truth! But it was the will of God that this joy should be short. It suddenly went away with the beautiful light which had caused it; and my poor soul was again wrapped in the most awful darkness. How ever profound that darkness was, a still darker object presented itself before my mind. It was as a very high mountain; but not composed of sand or stones, it was the mountain of my sins. I saw them all standing before me. And still more horrified was I when I saw it moving towards me as if, with a mighty hand, to crush me. I tried to escape, but in vain. I felt tied to the floor, and the next moment, it had rolled over me. I felt as crushed under its weight; for it was as heavy as granite. I could scarcely breathe! My only hope was to cry to God for help. With a loud voice, heard by many in the hotel, I cried: “O my God! have mercy upon me! My sins are destroying me! I am lost, save me!” But it seemed God could not hear me. The mountain was between, to prevent my cries from reaching Him, and to hide my tears. I suddenly thought that God would have nothing to do with such a sinner, but to open the gates of hell to throw me into that burning furnace prepared for his enemies, and which I had so richly deserved! I answered: “Dear Jesus, how sweet art thy words to my soul! Speak, oh! speak again! Yes, beloved Saviour, I want to love thee; but dost thou not see that mountain which is crushing me? Oh! remove it! Take away my sins!” I had not done speaking when I saw his mighty hand stretched out. He touched the mountain, and it rolled into the deep, and disappeared. At the same time, I felt as if a shower of the blood of the Lamb were falling upon me to purify my soul. And, suddenly, my humble room was transformed into a real paradise. The angels of God could not be more happy than I was in that most mysterious and blessed hour of my life. With an unspeakable joy, I said to my Saviour: “Dear Jesus, the Gift of God, I accept thee! Thou hast offered the pardon of my sins as a gift, I accept the gift. Thou hast brought me eternal life as a gift! I accept it! Thou hast redeemed and saved me, beloved Saviour, I know, I feel it. But this is not enough. I do not want to be saved alone. Save my people also. Save my whole country! I feel rich and happy in that gift; grant me to show its beauty and preciousness, to my people, that they may accept it, and rejoice in its possession.” This sudden revelation of that marvellous truth of salvation as a Gift, had so completely transformed me, that I felt quite a new man. The unutterable distress of my soul had been changed into an unspeakable joy. My fears had gone away, to They had gathered in great numbers to hear the reading of that strange message. But they unanimously said: “If Mr. Chiniquy has refused to give an unconditional act of submission, he has done right, we will stand by him to the end.” However, I knew nothing of that admirable resolution. I arrived at St. Anne, on a Sabbath day, at the hour of the morning service. There was an immense crowd at the door of the chapel. They rushed to me and said: “You are just coming from the bishop; what good news have you to bring us?” I answered: “No news here, my good friends, come to the chapel and I will tell you what the Lord has done for my soul.” When they had filled the large building, I told them. “Our Saviour, the day before his death, said to his disciples: ‘I will be a scandal to you, this night.’ I must tell you the same thing. I will be, to-day, I fear, the cause of a great scandal to every one of you. But, as the scandal which Christ gave to his disciples, has saved the world; I hope that, by the great mercy of God, the scandal I will give you will save you. I was your pastor till yesterday? But I have no more that honor to-day, for I have broken the ties by which I was bound as a slave at the feet of the bishops and of the Pope.” This sentence was scarcely finished, when a universal cry of surprise and sadness filled the church. “Oh! what does that mean?” exclaimed the congregation. “My dear countrymen,” I added, “I have not come to tell you to follow me! I did not die to save your immortal souls: “But, yesterday, I have learned, from the very lips of the Bishops of Rome, that we were a band of simpletons in believing those things. I have learned that the Church of Rome has nothing “When I requested the bishop to give me the precise form of submission he wanted from us, he answered: ‘Give me an act of submission without any condition, and promise that you will do anything I bid you.’ I replied: “‘This is not an act of submission, it is an act of adoration! I will never give it to you.!’ “‘If so,’ he said, ‘you can no longer be a Roman Catholic priest.’ “I raised my hands to heaven, and with a loud and cheerful voice, I said: ‘May God Almighty be forever blessed.’” I then told them something of my desolation, when alone, in my room; of the granite mountain which had been rolled over my shoulders, of my tears and of my despair. I told them also how my bleeding, dying crucified Saviour had brought me the forgiveness of my sins; how he had offered me eternal salvation as a Gift, and how rich, strong and happy I felt in that gift. I then offered them the Gift and besought them to accept it. My address lasted more than two hours, and God blessed it But this new appeal was still without any answer. I was filled with astonishment. However, it was evident to me that a great and mysterious change was wrought in that multitude. A thought suddenly flashed across my mind, and with an inexpressible sentiment of hope and joy, I told them: “My dear countrymen! The Mighty God, who gave me his saving light, yesterday, can grant you the same favor, to-day. He can, as well, save a thousand souls as one. I see, in your noble and Christian faces, that you do not want any more to be slaves of men. You want to be the free children of God, intelligent followers of the Gospel! The light is shining, and you like it. The gift of God has been offered to you, and you have accepted it! With me you will break the fetters of a captivity, worse than that of Egypt, to follow the Gospel of Christ, and take possession of the Promised Land: let all those who think it is better to follow Jesus Christ than the Pope, better to follow the Word of God than the traditions of men: let all those of you who want me to remain here and preach to you nothing but the Word of God, as we find it in the Gospel of Christ, tell it to me, by rising up. I am your man! Rise up!” Without a single exception, that multitude arose! More than a thousand of my countrymen had, forever, broken their fetters. They had crossed the Red Sea and exchanged the servitude of Egypt, for the blessings of the Promised Land! |