  Now that hypnotism is in the air, our conversation-books will have to be remodelled, as thus:— Good morning, have you hibernated well? Yes, I have had a most successful trance this winter. Have you laid up at all? Only for a few days at Christmas, just to escape the bills. I had a delightfully unconscious Boxing Day. Well, you take my advice old man, and rent a private catacomb on the three-years' system. It comes much cheaper in the end, and you save all your coal and gas, to say nothing of clothes. We've started a Nirvana Club in our neighbourhood on the tontine principle. The last person who wakes gets the prize, unless the first who comes to makes off with it. It is capital, anyway, when you are taking a tour. Saves all the trouble of sight-seeing. You are just packed up and forwarded from place to place, with an automatic Kodak which records everything you visited. Try it! Will, some day. By Jove, I must be off! I've got to attend an anÆsthetic concert, absolutely painless. And I've got a mesmeric dinner-party on to-night. All the bores will be put in glass-cases, and fed mechanically. Good-bye, then. Sleep well! MEN OF THE HOUR. MEN OF THE HOUR.THE TURNCOCK This eminent individual, born in the early forties, comes of a numerous family, and was originally destined by his parents for the career of a night-watchman. Not feeling, however, any vocation in this direction, he tried many other professions, and many other professions tried him. At last, in the year 1864, he entered the service of the Twiddlesex Water Company, where, by strict attention to the quality of his liquor, and his unfailing perception of the right time to be sober, he has risen to his present conspicuous and responsible position. |
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