Morning a fortnight later. The Scene is the refreshment-room attached to Mrs. Munning's house. Walls whitewashed, roof of glass. Long deal table at the lower end of which Paul sits writing a letter. Ink and a few papers on the table. In one corner is a quantity of cane-bottomed chairs. Below them, another table. Centre is a knife-cleaning machine, which badly needs oil. Knives on table. At the machine Zack stands in shirt-sleeves and apron. He is not energetic and turns lazily with many glances towards Paul. He sees Paul look at him and his efforts increase for a moment. Paul seals and stamps envelope and crosses to house door. Zack, left alone, mops his brow and sits. A low knock at the street door. Zack rises promptly and opens door with the air of a conspirator. Martha Wrigley is there.

ZACK. You've just come at the right time.

(Martha enters, but stays by door. Zack hurries behind the chairs and returns with a small newspaper parcel which he gives Martha.)

MARTHA. Thank you, Zack.

ZACK (referring to the parcel). It's a bit mixed-up on account of me putting bits of things into my pocket at table when nobody's watching, but it's all good food, Martha.

MARTHA. I'm sure I'm very grateful to you, Zack.

ZACK. Well, I often get up famished from my meals, and it's a fight to keep from feeling in my pocket, but I'm managing without.

MARTHA. Yes, and I—— Oh, Zack, I'm grateful. I am, really.

ZACK. I know you are.

MARTHA. Yes, but I want you to know I am, and if anything's going to come to you unpleasant, it's not my fault.

ZACK. Unpleasant?

MARTHA. I'm being driven, Zack. I'd never dream of such a thing myself.

ZACK. What ever is it?

MARTHA. It's father, Zack.

ZACK. Again? What's he broke now?

MARTHA. He's not broke anything, but you know your brother sacked him, and my father says he'll be revenged and——

ZACK. That's a nasty spirit, Martha.

MARTHA. And a nasty thing that Mr. Paul did, and all.

ZACK. I'm not denying that.

MARTHA. And I'd not mind whatever father did to Mr. Paul——

ZACK. Oh, Martha!

MARTHA. I wouldn't. Not for sacking him because he hurt himself. But father's doing it to you and I've to help him to do it, and—oh dear! (Her handkerchief comes out.)

ZACK. Don't cry. No, don't do it, Martha, because if you do, I'll have to console you, and you know what mother said to me the other day. (He is itching to "console," but restrains himself visibly.)

MARTHA. But it's———-

ZACK. Paul's coming back. Quick, Martha.

MARTHA (sniffing as she goes). Oh!

(Zack hustles her out c. and returns to his cleaning, not so quickly that Paul does not see his return. Paul opens the door and Virginia enters. Paul follows her in.)

VIRGINIA. You do look busy, Zack.

PAUL. He's good at looking it. I'd guarantee he hasn't raised his hand while I've been out of the room.

VIRGINIA (who is obviously quite fond of Zack). Oh, but you must be kind to Zack to-day.

PAUL. Why? What's to-day?

VIRGINIA. I knew you didn't know. Do you, Zack?

ZACK (up to wall, consulting calendar). Tuesday.

VIRGINIA. It's your birthday and I hope you'll have a very lucky day.

ZACK. My birthday! The twentieth of June. So it is.

(Paul returns to his correspondence at the table, half occupied, half listening.)

VIRGINIA. Yes. I was sure you didn't know.

ZACK. How did you know? Did mother tell you? Virginia. No.

ZACK. Who did?

VIRGINIA (with mock impressiveness). The family Bible, Zack! Your mother lent it me to look at something yesterday, and there I found it. Zachariah Manning, June 20th, 1886. Zack.

ZACK. Yes.

VIRGINIA. You knew?

ZACK. Yes. That's the year all right.

VIRGINIA. Then how dare you look forty when you're only twenty-nine?

ZACK. Do I?

VIRGINIA. You do, and I'm taking you in hand. Tell me, are your eyes so very bad?

ZACK. They're weak for reading with.

VIRGINIA. You're not always reading. Why do you wear your glasses when you're not?

ZACK. It's a trouble to be taking them off and putting them on.

VIRGINIA. So you keep them on all the time and damage your eyes. Come here, Zack. (She takes them off and gives them him.) There! Don't put those on again until you want to read. You look at least five years younger than you did.

ZACK. Do I?

VIRGINIA. You do. And now about the rest?

ZACK. What rest?

VIRGINIA. The other six years that we've got to wipe away. I've got a present for you upstairs to do that.

ZACK. A present!

VIRGINIA. Yes. Don't you usually get presents on your birthday?

PAUL. What! Between grown-ups?

VIRGINIA. Why not? It's just those little pleasant things that keep life sweet.

ZACK. I used to get a bag of humbugs when I was a tiny lad.

VIRGINIA. Oh, we keep on doing it at home and I shall do it here. Only I want a ha'penny from you first.

ZACK. A ha'penny!

VIRGINIA. My present cuts, and so you'll have to pay me for it to keep bad luck away. Ha'penny, please, (She holds hand out.)

ZACK (rather hurt at having to confess). I haven't got a ha'penny, Jenny.

VIRGINIA. What, have you spent last Saturday's wages already? It's only Tuesday.

ZACK. I don't get any wages.

PAUL. We've given up trusting Zack with money. He lost a shilling on the day you came.

VIRGINIA. Oh dear, then what's to be done? I know. You give Zack the ha'penny for a birthday present. Then he can give it me.

PAUL. What is your present, Jenny?

VIRGINIA. It's a shaving-set.

PAUL. Zack's no use for shaving. He's never shaved in his life.

VIRGINIA. His beard looks that kind of beard. That's why I want him to begin. Give him the ha'penny, Paul. Paul. Oh, it'll not matter. Zack isn't superstitious. Virginia. But I am. All decent-minded women are. And I won't cut my friendship for Zack.

PAUL. Well, if you insist. (Taking coins from pocket.) Oh, no good. I've got no change.

VIRGINIA. You've got a sixpence there. That will do. (She takes it and hands it Zack.) There you are, Zack. Now you give it me and I'll get your present from upstairs.

PAUL. But—Jenny—sixpence!

(Mrs. Munning opens door l. and enters with James Abbott, a pleasant gentleman, dressed in good country clothes.)

(The little episode is suspended. Paul becomes the shopman with a customer. Zack stands away and Virginia sits on the pile of wood.)

MRS. MUNNING. Paul.

PAUL. Good morning, Mr. Abbott.

ABBOTT. Good morning, Munning.

MRS. MUNNING. Mr. Abbott's called to settle his account, Paul.

PAUL. Account! You are prompt, sir. I only sent it out last night.

ABBOTT. Any objections to prompt settlement, Munning? (Paying out notes and gold.)

PAUL. Not at all. I only wish I could find everybody so quick at paying.

(Paul writes receipt at table.)

ABBOTT. It's like this, Munning. When I'm satisfied I believe in showing it, and paying promptly is my way of showing that you've pleased me.

MRS. MUNNING. I'm very glad to hear that, Mr. Abbott.

ABBOTT. And I'm glad too, for I don't mind telling you now it's over that I had my doubts. The last once or twice that I've attended weddings where you did the catering I've not been well impressed at all. There's been a harshness, Munning, and when I got married I was in two minds about putting it with you or going to those people over at Norton Parva. Wilson's, isn't it?

PAUL. Yes.

(Paul comes out with receipt, which Abbott takes and pockets.)

ABBOTT. But I decided to support a neighbour and you rewarded me for it. There was a—I don't know how you'd put it in words—a very pleasant atmosphere. I wanted things to go well.

PAUL. Naturally, sir.

ABBOTT. But I've no complaints at all. It went off with a—a sprightliness. Yes. Sunny's the word.

MRS. MUNNING. Thank you very much, Mr. Abbott.

ABBOTT. But mind you, Mrs. Munning, you don't always do it.

PAUL. I'm sure we try to make no difference.

ABBOTT. You don't always succeed as you did for me. There was a jolly feeling that I'm sure has not been there for some time past. Still, I was pleased, and I've told others I was pleased.

PAUL. Thanks very much. We have had more orders in this last fortnight.

ABBOTT. Well, I daresay some of them are due to me. Don't let me down now I've been recommending you. I can get out this way?

ZACK (opening door). Yes, Mr. Abbott.

ABBOTT (ignoring him, to Paul). Good-day, Munning.

PAUL and Mrs. Munning. Good-day, sir.

(Exit Abbott.)

MRS. MUNNING. Well, here's a change.

PAUL. He's not the first who's talked like that these last few times. But why they do it is a mystery to me.

MRS. MUNNING. I've got a guess. Jenny, you've brought us luck.

VIRGINIA. I?

MRS. MUNNING. It's since you came that things have taken this turn.

VIRGINIA. I'm very glad to hear it aunt,

MRS. MUNNING. You've been a blessing to us.

PAUL. I think I'll send some more accounts out, mother. They might fetch other people's money in like Mr. Abbott's.

VIRGINIA. Oh yes. I'm in your way here.

MRS. MUNNING. And you're not. You're never in the way.

PAUL. As if I'd mean a thing like that to you, Virginia.

VIRGINIA. But I was just going, aunt. I've something upstairs that I want to bring for Zack.

MRS. MUNNING. Zack?

VIRGINIA. You'd forgotten it's his birthday.

(Paul sits at the table.)

MRS. MUNNING. No, I hadn't, Jenny. Mothers don't forget a thing like that. But I'd not seen cause to mention it.

VIRGINIA. I'll get Zack's present. (She opens door.) By the way, wasn't it at Mr. Abbott's wedding that Zack began to go again?

MRS. MUNNING. I fancy it was.

VIRGINIA. And he's been going to the others since?

MRS. MUNNING. Yes. But he's still on trial. Why, Jenny?

VIRGINIA. I only wondered.

(Exit Virginia.)

PAUL. Get on with your work, Zack.

ZACK. Yes, Paul. (He turns the handle once or twice, and is then occupied testing the result.)

MRS. MUNNING. Come here a minute, Paul. You're not that busy.

PAUL. I'm not busy at all. I just made a show of it before Virginia. A good thing she heard him talk like that.

MRS. MUNNING. I'll tell you something better for the business than Mr. Abbott's talk.

PAUL. If you'll tell me what it is that makes people say one thing of us one week and change their minds the next, you'll be doing me a good turn.

MRS. MUNNING. I'll do you a better turn. I'd a chat with Virginia in her room last night.

PAUL. I heard your voices going late. You kept me awake.

MRS. MUNNING. Well, it was worth it, Paul. I knew they were well off, but there's more than I thought. The girl's got money of her own besides her mother's.

(Zack turns the handle.)

PAUL. Some folk get all the luck.

MRS. MUNNING. Well?

PAUL. Well what?

MRS. MUNNING. Don't you take me, Paul?

(Zack works the machine. Mrs. Munning turns on him.)

Oh, will you hush your noise, Zack? Get away out of this while I talk to Paul.

ZACK (going l.). Yes, mother.

PAUL. Go round to Bealey's and ask him if those nails have come. Don't be all day.

ZACK. No, Paul. (He turns to door and goes out.)

MRS. MUNNING. Look here, Paul, you could do a lot to this business if you had the capital. We could start a temperance hotel and give up the joinery altogether. Zack could clean boots.

PAUL. Aye. If——

MRS. MUNNING. She's got it.

PAUL. Well for her.

MRS. MUNNING. You're not slow to see your interests as a rule.

PAUL. Slow? I'd call it quick myself and very quick. I've known the girl a fortnight.

MRS. MUNNING. Oh, you do see what I'm driving at.

PAUL. I saw it days ago.

MRS. MUNNING. And anything the matter with it?

PAUL. Only Virginia.

MRS. MUNNING. What's wrong with her?

PAUL. She don't show willing.

MRS. MUNNING. Have you asked?

PAUL. Asked? I haven't. It's not a thing to rush at, mother. I've to look at every side before I take a leap like that.

MRS. MUNNING. What are you frightened of?

PAUL. I wouldn't like to get refused. I don't so much as know she thinks of me at all.

MRS. MUNNING. And what do you think I'm doing all these days? I've done nothing else but keep you in her mind. She knows it all from A to Z. Why, only yesterday I gave her the Bible to look at, and you know what's written in the front of it. There's every prize you ever won at school on record with the date and——

PAUL. And what she found in the Bible was that it's Zack's birthday to-day and she's giving him a present.

MRS. MUNNING. Well, she's got a kind heart. I saw her give a beggar sixpence yesterday.

PAUL. That isn't kindness. It's extravagance, and I've no taste for a wife who throws her money away.

MRS. MUNNING. She couldn't throw it if she hadn't got it first. And I'd trust you to let her know that charity begins at home when she's your wife.

PAUL. There's something in that.

MRS. MUNNING. There's all in it. I say we've got a golden chance, and I don't know what you're shirking for. Our luck's well in all round with people talking sensibly about us and the orders coming in.

PAUL. That's not to say Virginia 'ull have me.

MRS. MUNNING. You'll get to know by asking, Paul. And I tell you she's ripe for it.

PAUL. Ripe?

MRS. MUNNING. The girl's in love. She's got the signs of it all over her. It only needs a bit of enterprise from you, and all's as good as done.

PAUL. I've seen no signs of love. She's got a thumping appetite, if that's your meaning.

MRS. MUNNING. Where's your eyes? The girl's another creature since she's been with us.

PAUL. The country air did that. I thought love made them pale.

MRS. MUNNING. Quit talking, Paul. Are you in love with any other girl?

PAUL. What, me in love? I've got more sense.

MRS. MUNNING. Then marry Virginia.

PAUL. All right. I'll try.

(Enter Virginia. She has a small brown-papered parcel.)

VIRGINIA. Oh! is Zack not here?

MRS. MUNNING. He's gone out on an errand. Did you want him?

VIRGINIA. Yes. To give him this. But it will do later. (She turns away.)

MRS. MUNNING. Oh, don't go, Jenny.

VIRGINIA. But Paul's busy here.

MRS. MUNNING. Paul's never too busy to have some time for you. But I've got to see Sally myself, so I'll leave you two together.

(Exit Mrs. Munning.)

PAUL. I'll make you comfortable here. (He fusses at the chairs and places one for her.)

VIRGINIA. Oh, please don't trouble, Paul.

PAUL. There's no trouble about it, Jenny. It's always a pleasure to do things for you.

VIRGINIA. Why, Paul, I didn't know.

PAUL. Know what?

VIRGINIA. That you did things for me.

PAUL. You didn't? Well, I haven't boasted up to now.

VIRGINIA. No. Then it's you, and I've been thinking it was Zack.

PAUL. Thought what was Zack?

VIRGINIA. I thought Zack brought the roses that I'm always finding in my room and——

PAUL (uneasy, but bluffing). Zack? Did you ever see him doing it?

VIRGINIA. No. And it was you. (Hand out.) Paul, I apologize.

PAUL. Apologize? For what? (He touches her hand.)

VIRGINIA. I imagined you too businesslike to think of doing anything like that.

PAUL. Well, Jenny, you were wrong that time. I've got an eye to business, but I'm not quite blind to other things. I've eyes to see the roses coming to your cheeks to match the roses in your room.

VIRGINIA. Yes. I do look better for my stay with you, don't I?

PAUL. It's working wonders, Jenny. The country is the place for you.

VIRGINIA. I shall be sorry to go.

PAUL. Oh, that's too bad. To talk of going.

VIRGINIA. Not yet, of course.

PAUL. And not at all, if I'd my way.

VIRGINIA. Not at all?

PAUL. Are you so set on towns?

VIRGINIA. I live in one.

PAUL. Yes, but I wonder why. It beats me why you and your mother want to live in ugliness with noise and bad air, Jenny. Where's the need for it?

VIRGINIA. Friends. Associations. That's all.

PAUL. You'd never want for friends anywhere.

VIRGINIA. But I've to think of mother. She's like an old tree, firmly rooted and she's hard to move. So we stay where we are.

PAUL. And you'll grow ill again.

VIRGINIA. Oh no. I shall be all right now.

PAUL. You'd be better here.

VIRGINIA. I can't stay here for ever.

PAUL. We might find out a way, Jenny.

VIRGINIA. How?

PAUL. Don't you see? (Takes her hand.)

VIRGINIA. Paul! I never thought of this.

PAUL. I've thought of nothing else since I set eyes on you.

VIRGINIA (withdrawing hand). But I must think a little now and—and confess.

PAUL. Confess! You mean that in the town——

VIRGINIA. Not in the town, Paul. Here!

PAUL. You don't mean——

VIRGINIA. Yes. I thought I was so clever and could see what you and aunt were blind to. It was just a bad mistake, but I have had Zack in my mind a lot. So much, Paul, that I didn't think of you, or if I did it was as something not quite—— I liked Zack, and I fancied you were wrong to make so little of him. Why, even now, when Mr. Abbott came to say how pleased he'd been and you were puzzled at it all, I thought I'd guessed the cause and put it down to Zack.

PAUL. Well—that's a queer idea.

VIRGINIA. I know it must seem queer to you. I'm sorry I was stupid, Paul. Of course you must know best, living with Zack for all these years. But—isn't it just a little hard to keep him without money?

PAUL. You don't know all the truth. We do. We've had experience of Zack.

VIRGINIA. Yes. I suppose I'm being rash again.

PAUL. I think we've got the size of him, Virginia. He's bone-lazy.

VIRGINIA. Yes.

PAUL. Well, that's Zack. But I was talking of myself—and you.

VIRGINIA. You'll have to give me time for that, please, Paul. I made a false start and I have to see things all over again before I get them right.

PAUL. You're not convinced that Zack's a fool.

VIRGINIA. I have your word now, Paul. But that doesn't quite mean that I—I—

PAUL. That you love me.

VIRGINIA. It doesn't follow, does it, Paul?

PAUL. I hoped it might.

VIRGINIA. Some day, when I'm used to knowing that it's you who've done the little things that made me happy here, it might come, Paul. I cannot say just yet.

(The door c. is burst open violently and Joe Wrigley stands in the doorway. Behind him, both very reluctant, are Zack and Martha. Joe is a big man, with his left arm in a sling. He is strong in body and purpose, and has a useful gift of sly humour. He can dominate, and in the ensuing scene, he does. He advances. Zack closes the door, and he and Martha try to look effaced in the background.)

WRIGLEY. Good morning.

PAUL. Wrigley!

WRIGLEY. That's me.

PAUL. Get out of this. There's nothing here for you. Wrigley. I beg to differ, Mr. Paul. We've things to settle here, have you and me.

PAUL. Well, you can't settle them now. I'm busy. Wrigley. I'm not, and so I'll wait your pleasure. Paul. I've finished with you, Wrigley.

WRIGLEY. No, you haven't, Mr. Paul. You only think you have.

VIRGINIA. I'd better go, Paul.

PAUL. No. I'll get rid of him.

WRIGLEY. When things are settled, you'll get rid of me. And not before.

PAUL. You're trespassing in here. I tell you to get out.

WRIGLEY. You'll do yourself no good by quarrelling. It's him I've come about. Him and her. Your Zack and my Martha.

PAUL. Zack? What about him?

WRIGLEY. They've got to be married.

PAUL. What!

VIRGINIA. Oh, how horrid! (She turns away.)

ZACK (following her). No, no! Please, Virginia! It isn't true.

WRIGLEY (growling). What isn't true?

ZACK. I mean you're twisting it.

WRIGLEY. You're going to marry her.

ZACK. Yes. If you say so, but you make it sound so bad the way you're putting it. I mean, you'll make Virginia think that I——

WRIGLEY. And who cares what she thinks?

ZACK. I care, Mr. Wrigley, I do indeed.

WRIGLEY. Oh! Then you're blacker than I took you for. Carrying on with two young women at once.

VIRGINIA. Upon my word!

WRIGLEY. It's he that said he cared, miss. It wasn't me.

PAUL. Let's have this from the beginning, Wrigley.

WRIGLEY. Beginning? I reckon this began when the Lord made him a male and her a female.

PAUL. Oh yes. That's very funny, but——

WRIGLEY. It's not. There's nothing funny in the ways of sex. They've been the worry of the world for ever since the world grew bigger than the Garden of Eden, and if you think they're funny, you've a lot to learn.

PAUL. Wrigley, do you know who you're speaking to?

WRIGLEY. Aye. Brother of my future son-in-law. Makes you a kind of sideways son of mine yourself.

PAUL. We'll have this tale from Zack if you won't tell it straight.

WRIGLEY. I'd rather; and I'll just be here to know he tells it straight.

(Wrigley sits.)

PAUL. Now, Zack. No. Wait a minute. Mother had best be in at this. (Opening door.) Mother!

VIRGINIA. And I had better not. (She follows to door.)

PAUL. Are you afraid to know the worst of him? (Call-ing.) Mother!

MRS. MUNNING (off). I'm coming, Paul.

VIRGINIA. Oh, Zack, Zack, I am so disappointed in you.

ZACK. I meant no harm, Virginia. It's a thing that's grown from nothing like, and I don't know how it grew so fast.

MRS. MUNNING (entering). What is it, Paul?

PAUL. Zack and Joe Wrigley's girl. Now go on, Zack. What have you done?

ZACK. I've got to speak it out before you all and with Virginia hearing, too?

VIRGINIA. I'll go.

PAUL. Why should you?

VIRGINIA. Because I prefer it, Paul.

(Exit Virginia.)

MRS. MUNNING. We're waiting, Zack.

ZACK. Well, there isn't much to tell that you don't know about, mother.

MRS. MUNNING. I!

ZACK. You started the whole thing off.

MRS. MUNNING. When?

ZACK. You mind that day when Martha came to tell us Joe had broke his arm and Martha took on so in our parlour.

MRS. MUNNING. Well?

ZACK. Well, that's it.

MRS. MUNNING. That!

ZACK. Yes. You came in when I was trying to console her and——

MRS. MUNNING. I caught you kissing her, if that's what you mean.

WRIGLEY. Ah! That's a point. I'd been waiting for that to come.

ZACK. I know I kissed her, but it wasn't a meaning kiss. She was blubbing and she wouldn't hush and so I kissed her like I'd kiss a baby to console it.

WRIGLEY. You kissed her. That's enough.

ZACK. But it weren't for pleasure, Mr. Wrigley. She was too wet.

MRS. MUNNING. He kissed her all right. I saw it. What about it?

WRIGLEY. He's got to marry her. That's all.

MRS. MUNNING. Now what has kissing a girl to do with marriage?

WRIGLEY. A lot. He's going to marry her because you said so.

MRS. MUNNING. I?

ZACK. That's the trouble, mother. You did say something, joking like. You said, "When's the wedding?" and I joked back and said, "About a month," and Martha took it serious and told her father, and he told other people and it's all over the village. It's expected of me now, and I suppose——

MRS. MUNNING. Be quiet, Zack.

ZACK. You told me to tell you.

MRS. MUNNING. Keep your mouth shut when I tell you. You only open it to give yourself away.

WRIGLEY. You needn't trouble, missus. He's done all that.

MRS. MUNNING. Done what? You know he'd no intentions, and he hasn't any now. He's made no promises.

WRIGLEY. He's promised and he's made her presents.

MRS. MUNNING. You'll have to prove that first.

WRIGLEY. Prove? Where's that parcel, Martha?

(Martha comes timidly forward with it.)

Open it. See that?

MRS. MUNNING. This? Crusts of bread and bits of meat!

WRIGLEY. That's it. Bread you baked and meat from what you had for dinner yesterday.

MRS. MUNNING. How did you come by this?

ZACK. I saved them from my food. She told me she was always hungry and I felt that sorry for her.

MRS. MUNNING (giving the parcel to Martha). You're too soft to live. Well, that's only giving charity, Joe Wrigley.

WRIGLEY. With lots of folk it might be, but it's something else than charity when one of your family starts giving things away.

MRS. MUNNING. It's nowt to do with marrying and promising, so what it is.

WRIGLEY. He promised her not half an hour ago in Tim Bealey's shop, with witnesses and all. There was Tim Bealey there and his missus and the errand lad and me.

MRS. MUNNING. Is that true, Zack?

ZACK. I did say something, mother.

MRS. MUNNING. You silly fool!

ZACK. But it was only to save argument. I do hate argument when people have a voice as loud as Joe's.

MRS. MUNNING. That means you forced him, Wrigley.

WRIGLEY. It means he promised before witnesses, and I'll take good care he keeps his word.

MRS. MUNNING. Come here, Martha. Do you want to marry him?

WRIGLEY. Of course she does.

MRS. MUNNING. Let the girl speak for herself.

MARTHA. I'd like to, Mrs. Munning. Only not if Zack don't want as well. I'd not expect it.

WRIGLEY. But I expect it.

PAUL. Yes, Joe, we know it's you we've got to thank for this.

WRIGLEY. I reckon it's me all right. You'll think twice before you sack a man for getting hurt another time. I'll teach you something.

PAUL (quietly). Will you? By marrying your girl to Zack?

WRIGLEY. That's it. I'll break your pride.

PAUL. It might break you. I wouldn't swear that this wouldn't make me, Joe.

MARTHA (up to Zack). I didn't go to do it, Zack. I don't want to be no trouble to nobody.

MRS. MUNNING. Do you want her, Zack?

ZACK. I'd rather not say, mother. I wouldn't like to hurt her feelings.

PAUL. Do you want to marry her?

ZACK. I'd rather drown myself.

MARTHA. Oh!

ZACK (to her). There, there, Martha. I didn't mean to hurt you. There!

MRS. MUNNING. Keep your great hands to yourself, Zack, can't you?

ZACK. I've hurt her feelings, mother.

MRS. MUNNING. And I'll hurt yours if you don't do what I tell you sharp.

WRIGLEY. Come, Mrs. Munning. What's to do with a chap putting his arm round the girl he's going to marry?

MRS. MUNNING. He's just about the same chance of marrying her as you have of coming back to work here, Joe.

WRIGLEY. I fancy both our chances then.

MRS. MUNNING. You'd lose your money.

WRIGLEY. I think not, Mrs. Munning. I've a notion that you'll weigh things up and come to seeing this my way. I've not come here to quarrel with my relations to be, but I'll just point out that Wilson's of Norton are getting business off you every day and you can't afford a scandal in your line of trade.

MRS. MUNNING. Be careful, Wrigley. Threats of that kind have a nasty name.

WRIGLEY. I'm not afraid of names. Come here, Martha. We've given them enough to think about.

MARTHA. Yes, father.

WRIGLEY. I'll look in later for your answer. (Opens door.)

PAUL. You needn't. You can have it now.

MRS. MUNNING. You can. I'll give it you. It's this, that——

PAUL. Zack can go with you now to see the vicar, Joe.

WRIGLEY. Eh?

MRS. MUNNING. What?

ZACK. Paul!

MRS. MUNNING. Paul, are you mad?

ZACK. But I don't want to marry her. I don't indeed.

PAUL. You've made your bed and you'll lie on it. I'll stir no hand to save you.

MRS. MUNNING. But, Paul——

PAUL. I've got my reasons, mother, and they're sound.

ZACK. There's no great hurry, is there, Paul?

PAUL. If a thing's to be done, it's best done quick. We'll have the banns put up on Sunday.

WRIGLEY. You're in a mighty haste. It's giving things a queerish twist to me.

PAUL. When I've to take a dose of physic, I don't play round because it's got a filthy taste. I get it down.

ZACK. But it's my physic, Paul.

PAUL. You'll do as you're told.

MARTHA. I'm sure I'll try to make you a good wife, Zack.

ZACK. If it comes to the worst, I'll try and all. But we might both try and make a mess of it for all we tried. I'm against this, Martha, and it's no good wrapping up the truth. I don't favour it and I can't see sense in it at all.

PAUL. You've gone a bit too far to talk like that, my lad.

ZACK. I wouldn't say I'd gone at all, not knowingly, I mean. It's happened like, somehow, and I'll say this much or brast for it. It'll be the mistake of your life, Martha. I'm not cut out for a husband of yours. If ever you get wed——

PAUL. She's wedding you.

ZACK. Well, I don't favour it. I've as good a right to my opinion as anybody else and I say it's not fair doing to Martha.

WRIGLEY. Is Martha all you're thinking of?

ZACK. There's me as well, and I tell you what I told you down in Bealey's shop. I'm always one to take the short road out of trouble and I'm ready to oblige you. But I don't like it and the more I think about Martha the worse it looks to saddle her with me. Martha's the helpless sort and I'm the helpless sort and you don't make two soft people into strong by wedding them together. She'd try to lean on me and I'd try to lean on her and there'd be nothing there to lean on. It's like trying to make weak tea strong by watering the pot. Martha'll only wed with trouble when she weds a gormless chap like me, and I don't favour it. I see no sense in it at all, and it's no use saying I do, because I don't.

MRS. MUNNING. And I don't see the sense in doing things to please Joe Wrigley.

PAUL. I'm doing this to please myself, not him. What are you waiting for, Wrigley? You've got your answer.

WRIGLEY. I dunno.

PAUL. Then don't wait. If you want to see Mr. Andrews, it's a good time to catch him now before his lunch.

WRIGLEY. Come along.

(Wrigley and Martha move towards door.)

ZACK. Paul! You're going to have me called in church?

PAUL. It's the usual place.

ZACK. Me and Martha Wrigley! And everybody listening!

PAUL. Take him with you, Joe.

ZACK (going slowly). Well, I don't favour it at all. I'll do my best for Martha, but I'm a silly best for any girl. I've got no heart in this.

(Mrs. Munning goes up towards Zack. Paul stops her with a gesture. Exit Zack, after Wrigley and Martha.)

MRS. MUNNING (turning angrily.) You're crossing me in this. I've not said much so far because there's time to stop it yet.

PAUL. You won't want to stop it, mother.

MRS. MUNNING. Won't I? I'm not particular fond of Zack, but he's my son as much as you, and I've no taste to see a Munning standing up in church with a daughter of Joe Wrigley's.

PAUL. I've just two things to say to that. The first is that you started it with joking about marriage, and the second's what you're planning now for Virginia and me.

MRS. MUNNING. Virginia?

PAUL. I've had that talk with her.

MRS. MUNNING. Well? Is it right?

PAUL. It isn't right, and it was very wrong. I've got her coming round. No more than that. But this affair of Zack's chimes in with what we want.

MRS. MUNNING. What's Zack to do with her?

PAUL. That's where the queerness comes. What do you think, mother?

MRS. MUNNING. I'm getting past all thought to-day.

PAUL. She'd him in mind.

MRS. MUNNING. Zack! Well, I don't know! What's Zack been doing that takes her fancy?

PAUL. Did you ever know Zack do anything? Oh, she told me one thing. He's been putting flowers in her room.

MRS. MUNNING. In her room! The impudence.

PAUL. I put those flowers there. You understand?

MRS. MUNNING. You? Oh, I see.

PAUL. And I'll tell you something else. She thinks the weddings have got a better name because Zack's going to them now.

MRS. MUNNING. But Zack does nothing but break things when he goes.

PAUL. I'm telling you what she thinks, not what we know. She's got a fancy picture of him in her mind, and while it's there, she'll never marry me. That's why he'll marry Martha.

MRS. MUNNING. I'm not at ease about it, Paul.

PAUL. Whose scheme was it for me to marry Jenny? Mine or yours?

MRS. MUNNING. It's mine, I know.

PAUL. Then you shouldn't scheme if you're not prepared to put things through. I am prepared. I didn't think seriously of this until you set me on. But now I'm on, I'm on, and it'll not be Zack will stop me, neither.

MRS. MUNNING. We'll have to set them up.

PAUL. That won't cost much.

MRS. MUNNING. I'll never bear the sight of Zack living along of Martha in the village here.

PAUL. We might get over that. It's costing something, but there'll be Virginia's money soon, and so—

MRS. MUNNING. What's in your mind?

PAUL. A clean sweep, mother. Getting rid of them. It's much the best. Zack's never any use to us.

MRS. MUNNING. Get rid?

PAUL. We'll emigrate them when they're married.

MRS. MUNNING. You're thinking fast.

PAUL. Leave it to me, mother. I'll arrange it. Yes. It's all plain sailing now. Zack married and in Canada, and me and Jenny here with you. I'll see that steamship agency at Bollington to-morrow and find out the cost.

(Zack enters.)

What on earth——-? You've never seen Mr. Andrews in this time?

ZACK. No.

PAUL. Then what do you mean by coming back?

ZACK. Well, I wasn't satisfied we were doing right, Paul, and I got a notion as I went along with Joe and Martha.

PAUL. A notion?

ZACK. I made my mind up I'd consult somebody before it got to doing things so final as the banns.

PAUL. But we've decided.

ZACK. I know you have, but I'm still doubtful, and I thought I'd ask Virginia to tell me what to do.

MRS. MUNNING. Ask Virginia?

ZACK. Yes. Tell her all about it and just see what she advises me to do. I've a great respect for her opinions.

PAUL. More than you have for ours?

ZACK. I can't say that until I know what her opinion is.

MRS. MUNNING. She'll be disgusted with you.

PAUL. You'll keep your foolishness to yourself, Zack, do you hear?

ZACK. I'm hard put to it to see I have been foolish, Paul. Virginia will tell me, I expect.

MRS. MUNNING. Where have you left Joe Wrigley? At the Vicarage?

ZACK. No. At the "Bunch of Grapes."

PAUL. The "Bunch of Grapes"! The crazy fool. Drinking when he'd a job like this to do.

ZACK. I suppose he'd have a drink.

PAUL. Oh, yes, he'd money for that. They've never any money, but there's always some for drink.

ZACK. It wasn't his fault,"Paul. I gave it him,

MRS. MUNNING. You! Where did you get money from?

ZACK. I gave him sixpence that Paul gave me this morning for a birthday present.

MRS. MUNNING. Paul gave you sixpence!

PAUL. Yes, I did, as it happens. For a purpose, though. (Turns on Zack.) What gets me is Joe Wrigley's letting loose of you at any price.

ZACK. I gave him an explanation of that. I told him I'd forgotten something important.

PAUL. And he believed you for sixpence?

ZACK. But I had forgotten something, Paul.

PAUL. What?

ZACK. Well——

MRS. MUNNING. What's that you're hiding behind you all this time?

ZACK. I'd forgotten these. (He discloses a small bunch of roses.) They're wild roses from the hedge and I came back to put them in Virginia's room when she's not there, same as I have done every day, only I'd forgotten them this morning.

MRS. MUNNING. You can just leave off doing it then. Virginia's room! Have you no sense of decency?

ZACK. I'm sure she likes them, mother.

PAUL (anxiously). She never told you so?

ZACK. No, but I've seen her smiling at me and——

MRS. MUNNING. She may well smile. Your ways would make a cat laugh.

ZACK. I'll—I'll throw the flowers away. (He turns towards door.)

PAUL. Give me those flowers! (Following him to door.)

ZACK. But——

PAUL. Go back and get your business done.

(Enter Virginia from the house. She has a small parcel. There is a conflict of wills at the street door. Then Zack steps into the room again. Paul closes the door. Virginia notices the flowers. She goes towards Paul, smiling.)

PAUL. Oh! You've—you've caught me this time.

VIRGINIA. But you needn't look ashamed, Paul.

PAUL. I didn't know I did. I'll—I'll take them away now.

VIRGINIA. That's very sweet of you.

(Zack watches agape. Paul goes out with the roses.)

VIRGINIA. Now, Zack, I don't think you deserve it, but I brought your birthday present down, and here it is. A shaving-set.

ZACK. I'm sorry, but I haven't got a coin to give you now for luck.

VIRGINIA. That doesn't matter now.

ZACK. Oh, Jenny!

MRS. MUNNING. I'd think not, too, with you disgraced. Haven't you got a word of thanks for your razor?

ZACK. Yes. It's the best gift you could make me, Jenny.

VIRGINIA. And you promise me you'll use it, Zack?

ZACK. I'll use it right enough. I'll cut my throat with it.

MRS. MUNNING. Zack! He doesn't know what he's saying, Jenny.

ZACK. I do know, and I mean it, too. (Tearing at paper of the parcel.)

VIRGINIA (dryly). You'd have some trouble, Zack. It's a safety razor.

ZACK. You're all against me, all of you, and I don't care what happens to me.

VIRGINIA. Zack, listen to me. I'm not against you, though I'm very, very sorry for what you've done.

ZACK. I haven't done anything and nobody will let me tell you and——

MRS. MUNNING. Your cousin doesn't want to hear about that, Zack.

ZACK. You're trying to stop her hearing and I'm going to tell her now. She's got it all so wrong. I know I'm not an angel in trousers, but I'm not a wrong 'un neither, and——

MRS. MUNNING. That will do, Zack. You've said enough.

ZACK. You'll none of you be sorry when I'm dead.

VIRGINIA. I should be very sorry, Zack. What is it that you want to tell me?

ZACK. Mother won't let me speak.

VIRGINIA. I'm sure she will. She's leaving us together now, so that you may tell me what you want to say.

MRS. MUNNING. I doubt it's safe for you, Jenny. He's a bit beside himself.

VIRGINIA. It's quite the best way, aunt. To let him open his heart to me. He'll be much better after that.

MRS. MUNNING. He'll tell a pack of lies to get the soft side of you.

VIRGINIA. I'll make all due allowances, aunt, if you will leave me with him now.

MRS. MUNNING. I'm loth to, Jenny.

VIRGINIA. Then Zack and I will take a walk and he shall tell me as we go.

MRS. MUNNING. Oh, if you're keen set like that, I'll go.

VIRGINIA. Thank you, aunt.

MRS. MUNNING (at door). But don't you go believing half of what he says.

(Exit Mrs. Munning.)

ZACK. I'm wonderful obliged to you, Jenny. I'll get some good advice now.

VIRGINIA. Sit down and tell me what you want to. Zack. I dunno where to begin. It's so mixed up. But I'm not a desperate bad lad, Virginia. I'm really not. Virginia. No. Begin at the beginning, Zack.

ZACK. It's like this, Jenny. On the day you came, Martha Wrigley came here to let us know her father had broke his arm, and I——

(The street door opens violently and Wrigley enters. Silently he goes to Zack and points to door.)

ZACK. I'm busy just now, Joe.

WRIGLEY. Are you coming?

ZACK. But—— Yes, Joe.

VIRGINIA (stopping Zack as he goes). I want Zack, Mr. Wrigley.

WRIGLEY. You can have him when I've done with him.

VIRGINIA. Mr. Wrigley, I ask you as a favour.

WRIGLEY. I'm sorry to disoblige a lady, but my affair comes first.

VIRGINIA. I think not.

ZACK. Let me go with him, Jenny.

VIRGINIA. But, Zack, you were going to tell me——

ZACK. I know. But he'll only argue, and I do hate argument. It wouldn't be any good, Virginia. My luck's dead out.

WRIGLEY (by door). Come on.

ZACK. Yes, Joe. Oh, what a birthday!

(Wrigley and Zack go out.)

CURTAIN.