The triumphal re-entry into the world has just begun, and exactly as Diaz foretold. And the life of the forest is over. We have come to Paris, and he has taken Paris, and already he is leaving it for other shores, and I am to follow. At this moment, while I write because I have not slept and cannot sleep, his train rolls out of St. Lazare. Last night! How glorious! But he is no longer wholly mine. The world has turned his face a little from my face.... It was as if I had never before realized the dazzling significance of the fame of Diaz. I had only once seen him in public. And though he conquered in the Jubilee Hall of the Five Towns, his victory, personal and artistic, at the Opera Comique, before an audience as exacting, haughty, and experienced as any in Europe, was, of course, infinitely more striking—a victory worthy of a Diaz. I sat alone and hidden at the back of a baignoire in the auditorium. I had drawn up the golden grille, by which the occupants of a baignoire may screen themselves from the curiosity of the parterre. I felt like some caged Eastern odalisque, and I liked so to feel. I liked to exist solely for him, to be mysterious, and to baffle the general gaze in order to be more precious to him. Ah, how I had changed! How he had changed me! It was Thursday, a subscription night, and, in addition, all Paris was in the theatre, a crowded company of celebrities, of experts, and of perfectly-dressed women. And no one knew who I was, nor why I was there. The vogue of a musician may be universal, but the vogue of an English writer is nothing beyond England and America. I had not been to a rehearsal. I had not met Villedo, nor even the translator of my verse. I had wished to remain in the background, and Diaz had not crossed me. Thus I gazed through the bars of my little cell across the rows of bald heads, and wonderful coiffures, and the waving arms of the conductor, and the restless, gliding bows of the violinists, and saw a scene which was absolutely strange and new to me. And it seemed amazing that these figures which I saw moving and chanting with such grace in a palace garden, authentic to the last detail of historical accuracy, were my La ValliÈre and my Louis, and that this rich and coloured music which I heard was the same that Diaz had sketched for me on the piano, from illegible scraps of ruled paper, on the edge of the forest. The full miracle of operatic art was revealed to me for the first time. And when the curtain fell on the opening act, the intoxicating human quality of an operatic success was equally revealed to me for the first time. How cold and distant the success of a novelist compared to this! The auditorium was suddenly bathed in bright light, and every listening face awoke to life as from an enchantment, and flushed and smiled, and the delicatest hands in France clapped to swell the mighty uproar that filled the theatre with praise. Paris, upstanding on its feet, and leaning over balconies and cheering, was charmed and delighted by the fable and the music, in which it found nothing but the sober and pretty elegance that it loves. And Paris applauded feverishly, and yet with a full sense of the value of its applause—given there in the only French theatre where the claque has been suppressed. And then the curtain rose, and La ValliÈre and Louis tripped mincingly forward to prove that after all they were Morenita and MontfÉriot, the darlings of their dear Paris, and utterly content with their exclusively Parisian reputation. Three times they came forward. And then the applause ceased, for Paris is not Naples, and it is not Madrid, and the red curtain definitely hid the stage, and the theatre hummed with animated chatter as elegant as Diaz’ music, and my ear, that loves the chaste vivacity of the French tongue, was caressed on every side by its cadences. ‘This is the very heart of civilization,’ I said to myself. ‘And even in the forest I could not breathe more freely.’ I stared up absently at Benjamin Constant’s blue ceiling, meretricious and still adorable, expressive of the delicious decadence of Paris, and my eyes moistened because the world is so beautiful in such various ways. Then the door of the baignoire opened. It was Diaz himself who appeared. He had not forgotten me in the excitements of the stage and the dressing-rooms. He put his hand lightly on my shoulder, and I glanced at him. ‘Well?’ he murmured, and gave me a box of bonbons elaborately tied with rich ribbons. And I murmured, ‘Well?’ The glory of his triumph was upon him. But he understood why my eyes were wet, and his fingers moved soothingly on my shoulder. ‘You won’t come round?’ he asked. ‘Both Villedo and Morenita are dying to meet you.’ I shook my head, smiling. ‘You’re satisfied?’ ‘More than satisfied,’ I answered. ‘The thing is wonderful.’ ‘I think it’s rather charming,’ he said. ‘By the way, I’ve just had an offer from New York for it, and another from Rome.’ I nodded my appreciation. ‘You don’t want anything?’ ‘Nothing, thanks,’ I said, opening the box of bonbons, ‘except these. Thanks so much for thinking of them.’ ‘Well—’ And he left me again. In the second act the legend—has not the tale of La ValliÈre acquired almost the quality of a legend?—grew in persuasiveness and in magnificence. It was the hour of La ValliÈre’s unwilling ascendancy, and it foreboded also her fall. The situations seemed to me to be poignantly beautiful, especially that in which La ValliÈre and Montespan and the Queen found themselves together. And Morenita had perceived my meaning with such a sure intuition. I might say that she showed me what I had meant. Diaz, too, had given to my verse a voice than which it appeared impossible that anything could be more appropriate. The whole effect was astonishing, ravishing. And within me—far, far within the recesses of my glowing heart—a thin, clear whisper spoke and said that I, and I alone, was the cause of that beauty of sight and sound. Not Morenita, and not MontfÉriot, not Diaz himself, but Magda, the self-constituted odalisque, was its author. I had thought of it; I had schemed it; I had fashioned it; I had evoked the emotion in it. The others had but exquisitely embroidered my theme. Without me they must have been dumb and futile. On my shoulders lay the burden and the glory. And though I was amazed, perhaps naively, to see what I had done, nevertheless I had done it—I! The entire opera-house, that complicated and various machine, was simply a means to express me. And it was to my touch on their heartstrings that the audience vibrated. With all my humility, how proud I was—coldly and arrogantly proud, as only the artist can be! I wore my humility as I wore my black gown. Even Diaz could not penetrate to the inviolable place in my heart, where the indestructible egoism defied the efforts of love to silence it. And yet people say there is nothing stronger than love. At the close of the act, while the ringing applause, much more enthusiastic than before, gave certainty of a genuine and extraordinary success, I could not help blushing. It was as if I was in danger of being discovered as the primal author of all that fleeting loveliness, as if my secret was bound to get about, and I to be forced from my seclusion in order to receive the acclamations of Paris. I played nervously and self-consciously with my fan, and I wrapped my humility closer round me, until at length the tumult died away, and the hum of charming, eager chatter reassured my ears again. Diaz did not come. The entr’acte stretched out long, and the chatter lost some of its eagerness, and he did not come. Perhaps he could not come. Perhaps he was too much engaged, too much preoccupied, to think of the gallantry which he owed to his mistress. A man cannot always be dreaming of his mistress. A mistress must be reconciled to occasional neglect; she must console herself with chocolates. And they were chocolates from Marquis’s, in the Passage des Panoramas.... Then he came, accompanied. A whirl of high-seasoned, laughing personalities invaded my privacy. Diaz, smiling humorously, was followed by a man and a cloaked woman. ‘Dear lady,’ he said, with an intimate formality, ‘I present Mademoiselle Morenita and Monsieur Villedo. They insisted on seeing you. Mademoiselle, Monsieur—Mademoiselle Peel.’ I stood up. ‘All our excuses,’ said Villedo, in a low, discreet voice, as he carefully shut the door. ‘All our excuses, madame. But it was necessary that I should pay my respects—it was stronger than I.’ And he came forward, took my hand, and raised it to his lips. He is a little finicking man, with a little gray beard, and the red rosette in his button-hole, and a most consummate ease of manner. ‘Monsieur,’ I replied, ‘you are too amiable. And you, madame. I cannot sufficiently thank you both.’ Morenita rushed at me with a swift, surprising movement, her cloak dropping from her shoulders, and taking both my hands, she kissed me impulsively. ‘You have genius,’ she said; ‘and I am proud. I am ashamed that I cannot read English; but I have the intention to learn in order to read your books. Our Diaz says wonderful things of them.’ She is a tall, splendidly-made, opulent creature, of my own age, born for the footlights, with an extremely sweet and thrilling voice, and that slight coarseness or exaggeration of gesture and beauty which is the penalty of the stage. She did not in the least resemble a La ValliÈre as she stood there gazing at me, with her gleaming, pencilled eyes and heavy, scarlet lips. It seemed impossible that she could refine herself to a La ValliÈre. But that woman is the drama itself. She would act no matter what. She has always the qualities necessary to a rÔle. And the gods have given her green eyes, so that she may be La ValliÈre to the very life. I began to thank her for her superb performance. ‘It is I who should thank you,’ she answered. ‘It will be my greatest part. Never have I had so many glorious situations in a part. Do you like my limp?’ She smiled, her head on one side. Success glittered in those orbs. ‘You limp adorably,’ I said. ‘It is my profession to make compliments,’ Villedo broke in; and then, turning to Morenita, ‘N’est-ce pas, ma belle crÉature? But really’—he turned to me again—‘but very sincerely, all that there is of most sincerely, dear madame, your libretto is made with a virtuosity astonishing. It is du thÉÂtre. And with that a charm, an emotion...! One would say—’ And so it continued, the flattering stream, while Diaz listened, touched, and full of pride. ‘Ah!’ I said. ‘It is not I who deserve praise.’ An electric bell trembled in the theatre. Morenita picked up her cloak. ‘Mon ami,’ she warned Villedo. ‘I must go. Diaz, mon petit! you will persuade Mademoiselle Peel to come to the room of the Directeur later. Madame, a few of us will meet there—is it not so, Villedo? We shall count on you, madame. You have hidden yourself too long.’ I glanced at Diaz, and he nodded. As a fact, I wished to refuse; but I could not withstand the seduction of Morenita. She had a physical influence which was unique in my experience. ‘I accept,’ I said. ‘A tout À l’heure, then,’ she twittered gaily; and they left as they had come, Villedo affectionately toying with Morenita’s hand. Diaz remained behind a moment. ‘I am so glad you didn’t decline,’ he said. ‘You see, here in this theatre Morenita is a queen. I wager she has never before in all her life put herself out of the way as she has done for you to-night.’ ‘Really!’ I faltered. And, indeed, as I pondered over it, the politeness of these people appeared to be marvellous, and so perfectly accomplished. Villedo, who has made a European reputation and rejuvenated his theatre in a dozen years, is doubtless, as he said, a professional maker of compliments. In his position a man must be. But, nevertheless, last night’s triumph is officially and very genuinely Villedo’s. While as for Morenita and Diaz, the mere idea of these golden stars waiting on me, the librettist, effacing themselves, rendering themselves subordinate at such a moment, was fantastic. It passed the credible.... A Diaz standing silent and deferential, while an idolized prima donna stepped down from her throne to flatter me in her own temple! All that I had previously achieved of renown seemed provincial, insular. But Diaz took his own right place in the spacious salon of Villedo afterwards, after all the applause had ceased, and the success had been consecrated, and the enraptured audience had gone, and the lights were extinguished in the silent auditorium. It is a room that seems to be furnished with nothing but a grand piano and a large, flat writing-table and a few chairs. On the walls are numberless signed portraits of singers and composers, and antique playbills of the OpÉra Comique, together with strange sinister souvenirs of the great fires which have destroyed the house and its patrons in the past. When Diaz led me in, only Villedo and the principal artists and Pouvillon, the conductor, were present. Pouvillon, astonishingly fat, was sitting on the table, idly swinging the electric pendant over his head; while Morenita occupied Villedo’s armchair, and Villedo talked to MontfÉriot and another man in a corner. But a crowd of officials of the theatre ventured on Diaz’ heels. And then came Monticelli, the premiÈre danseuse, in a coat and skirt, and then some of her rivals. And as the terrible Director did not protest, the room continued to fill until it was full to the doors, where stood a semicircle of soiled, ragged scene-shifters and a few fat old women, who were probably dressers. Who could protest on such a night? The democracy of a concerted triumph reigned. Everybody was joyous, madly happy. Everybody had done something; everybody shared the prestige, and the rank and file might safely take generals by the hand. Diaz was then the centre of attraction. It was recognised that he had entered that sphere from a wider one, bringing with him a radiance brighter than he found there. He was divine last night. All felt that he was divine. He spoke to everyone with an admirable modesty, gaily, his eyes laughing. Several women kissed him, including Morenita. Not that I minded. In the theatre the code is different, coarser, more banal. He alone raised this crowd above its usual level and gave it distinction. Someone suggested that, as the piano was there, he should play, and the demand ran from mouth to mouth. Villedo, appreciating its audacity, made a gesture to indicate that such a thing could not be asked. But Diaz instantly said that, if it would give pleasure, he would play with pleasure. And he sat down to the piano, and looked round, smiling, and the room was hushed in a moment, and each face was turned towards him. ‘What?’ he ejaculated. And then, as no definite recommendation was offered, he said: ‘Do you wish that I improvise?’ The idea was accepted with passionate, noisy enthusiasm. A cold perspiration broke out over my whole body. I must have turned very pale. ‘You are not ill, madame?’ asked that ridiculous fop, MontfÈriot, who had been presented to me, and was whispering the most fatuous compliments. ‘No, I thank you.’ The fact was that Diaz, since his retirement, had not yet played to anyone except myself. This was his first appearance. I was afraid for him. I trembled for him. I need not have done. He was absolutely master of his powers. His fingers announced, quite simply, one of the most successful airs from La ValliÈre, and then he began to decorate it with an amazing lacework of variations, and finished with a bravura display such as no pianist could have surpassed. The performance, marvellous in itself, was precisely suited to that audience, and it electrified the audience; it electrified even me. Diaz fought his way through kisses and embraces to Villedo, who stood on his toes and wept and put his arms round Diaz’ neck. ‘Cher maÎtre,’ he cried, ‘you overwhelm us!’ ‘You are too kind, all of you,’ said Diaz. ‘I must ask permission to retire. I have to conduct Mademoiselle Peel to her hotel, and there is much for me to do during the night. You know I start very early to-morrow.’ ‘HÉlas! Morenita sighed. I had blushed. Decidedly I behaved like a girl last night. But, indeed, the new, swift realization, as Diaz singled me out of that multitude, that after all he utterly belonged to me, that he was mine alone, was more than I could bear with equanimity. I was the proudest woman in the universe. I scorned the lot of all other women. The adieux were exchanged, and there were more kisses. ‘Au revoir! Bon voyage! Much success over there.’ The majority of these good, generous souls were in tears. Villedo opened a side-door, and we escaped into a corridor, only Morenita and one or two others accompanying us to the street. And on the pavement a carpet had been laid. The electric brougham was waiting. I gathered up my skirt and sprang in. Diaz followed, smiling at me. He put his head out of the window and said a few words. Morenita blew a kiss. Villedo bowed profoundly. The carriage moved in the direction of the boulevard.... I had carried him off. Oh, the exquisite dark intimacy of the interior of that smooth-rolling brougham! When, after the theatre, a woman precedes a man into a carriage, does she not publish and glory in the fact that she is his? Is it not the most delicious of avowals? There is something in the enforced bend of one’s head as one steps in. And when the man shuts the door with a masculine snap— I wondered idly what Morenita and Villedo thought of our relations. They must surely guess. We went down the boulevard and by the Rue Royale into the Place de la Concorde, where vehicles flitted mysteriously in a maze of lights under the vast dome of mysterious blue. And Paris, in her incomparable toilette of a June night, seemed more than ever the passionate city of love that she is, recognising candidly, with the fearless intellectuality of the Latin temperament, that one thing only makes life worth living. How soft was the air! How languorous the pose of the dim figures that passed us half hidden in other carriages! And in my heart was the lofty joy of work done, definitely accomplished, and a vista of years of future pleasure. My happiness was ardent and yet calm—a happiness beyond my hopes, beyond what a mortal has the right to dream of. Nothing could impair it, not even Diaz’ continued silence as to a marriage between us, not even the imminent brief separation that I was to endure. ‘My child,’ said Diaz suddenly, ‘I’m very hungry. I’ve never been so hungry.’ ‘You surely didn’t forget to have your dinner?’ I exclaimed. ‘Yes, I did,’ he admitted like a child; ‘I’ve just remembered.’ ‘Diaz!’ I pouted, and for some strange reason my bliss was intensified, ‘you are really terrible! What can I do with you? You will eat before you leave me. I must see to that. We can get something for you at the hotel, perhaps.’ ‘Suppose we go to a supper restaurant?’ he said. Without waiting for my reply, he seized the dangling end of the speaking-tube and spoke to the driver, and we swerved round and regained the boulevard. And in the private room of a great, glittering restaurant, one of a long row of private rooms off a corridor, I ate strawberries and cream and sipped champagne while Diaz went through the entire menu of a supper. ‘Your eyes look sad,’ he murmured, with a cigar between his teeth. ‘What is it? We shall see each other again in a fortnight.’ He was to resume his career by a series of concerts in the United States. A New York agent, with the characteristic enterprise of New York agents, had tracked Diaz even into the forest and offered him two hundred and fifty thousand dollars for forty concerts on the condition that he played at no concert before he played in New York. And in order to reach New York in time for the first concert, it was imperative that he should catch the Touraine at Havre. I was to follow in a few days by a Hamburg-American liner. Diaz had judged it more politic that we should not travel together. In this he was undoubtedly right. I smiled proudly. ‘I am both sad and happy,’ I answered. He moved his chair until it touched mine, and put his arm round my neck, and brought my face close to his. ‘Look at me,’ he said. And I looked into his large, splendid eyes. ‘You mustn’t think,’ he whispered, ‘that, because I don’t talk about it, I don’t feel that I owe everything to you.’ I let my face fall on his breast. I knew I had flushed to the ears. ‘My poor boy,’ I sobbed, ‘if you talk about that I shall never forgive you.’ It was heaven itself. No woman has ever been more ecstatically happy than I was then. He rang for the bill. We parted at the door of my hotel. In the carriage we had exchanged one long, long kiss. At the last moment I wanted to alter the programme, go with him to his hotel to assist in his final arrangements, and then see him off at early morning at the station. But he refused. He said he could not bear to part from me in public. Perhaps it was best so. Just as I turned away he put a packet into my hand. It contained seven banknotes for ten thousand francs each, money that it had been my delight to lend him from time to time. Foolish, vain, scrupulous boy! I knew not where he had obtained— It is now evening. Diaz is on the sea. While writing those last lines I was attacked by fearful pains in the right side, and cramp, so that I could not finish. I can scarcely write now. I have just seen the old English doctor. He says I have appendicitis, perhaps caused by pips of strawberries. And that unless I am operated on at once—And that even if—He is telephoning to the hospital. Diaz! No; I shall come safely through the affair. Without me Diaz would fall again. I see that now. And I have had no child. I must have a child. Even that girl in the blue peignoir had a—Chance is a strange— Extract translated from ‘Le Temps,’ the Paris Evening Paper. OBSEQUIES OF MISS PELL (sic). The obsequies of Mademoiselle Pell, the celebrated English poetess, and author of the libretto of La ValliÈre, were celebrated this morning at eleven o’clock in the Church of St. HonorÉ d’Eylau. The chief mourners were the doctor who assisted at the last moments of Mademoiselle Pell, and M. Villedo, director of the OpÉra-Comique. Among the wreaths we may cite those of the Association of Dramatic Artists, of Madame Morenita, of the management of the OpÉra-Comique, and of the artists of the OpÉra-Comique. Mass was said by a vicar of the parish, and general absolution given by M. le CurÉ Marbeau. During the service there was given, under the direction of M. LÊtang, chapel-master, the Funeral March of Beethoven, the Kyrie of Neidermeyer, the Pie Jesu of Stradella, the Ego Sum of Gounod, the Libera Me of S. Rousseau. M. Deep officiated at the organ. After the ceremony the remains were transported to the cemetery of PÈre-Lachaise and cremated. |