My Friends:

I have shown that the chief way in which the station of a domestic is to be raised in public estimation, is by raising the character of those who occupy this situation. I have shown also, that it is by the formation of a right character, that we are to secure true happiness both in this and in a future life. You will therefore understand the propriety of my attempting to point out the course which you need to take in order to form the right character, and also the proper manner of performing your various duties in life.

In attempting this, I will first direct your attention to what are called the duties of subordination.

By this I mean those duties owed by all persons to those who have authority, or any right to control and direct them. We all of us know that no kind of work can be well done, unless there are overseers to direct those who work. For this reason, every kind of business is managed by persons, who have authority to control others. The rulers of a nation have a right to direct others in all points where the laws require them so to do. The captain of a ship has authority to command all his hands. The master of a store, or shop, has a right to control all who work in his employ. The teacher of a school has a right to command his scholars in all matters pertaining to his school. The master and mistress of a family, too, have a right to control their children, and also all those persons whom they hire to do their work, in all matters relating to this work.

In all these cases, those who are entitled to direct others should be treated with respect by those who are under their control; and in all those matters where they have a right to command, they should be cheerfully and exactly obeyed.

This duty is constantly, and often enjoined by God in his Holy Word. “Submit yourselves to every ordinance of man for the Lord’s sake.” “Obey those that have rule over you.” “Render therefore to all their dues, fear to whom fear, and honour to whom honour is due.”

It is because the duties of subordination are so important to the happiness of those who are to be controlled, as well as to society at large, that God so often and so earnestly urges these duties in the Bible. And we cannot fully realize the force of these directions, unless we bear in mind the state of things that existed when they were written.

In the first place, the kings and rulers over the people, in those times when these directions were given, were not those appointed by themselves, who were to rule according to laws made by the people for their own good, as is the case in this country. Instead of this, the rulers were bad men and cruel tyrants, who by the help of their soldiers gained power and authority by mere strength. And in the family state, the domestics were not, as in this country, persons who for a reward agree to perform the work of the family. On the contrary, they were white men and women, who were forced against their will into servitude, and driven by stripes and cruelties to work for their masters. Some of these white slaves, it is probable, were from England, the land of our forefathers.

Now what were the directions given by God to subjects, and to domestics, in these circumstances? He did not tell them, that because their rulers and masters were bad men, and had gained power in a wrong way, that they might refuse to obey. On the contrary, God saw that it was best, whenever men gain the power over others, that the weaker ones should submit and obey. He teaches us that the power which men gain over each other in this way, is permitted by God. In Prov. 8: 15, 16, God says, “By me kings rule, and princes decree justice. By me princes rule, and nobles, even all the judges of the earth.” This teaches us, that in whatever way it may be, that men gain power to rule over others, so long as they really hold this power, it is by the permission of God. Though he may disapprove of the men, and of the means they use to get power, yet so long as they hold the power, He sees that it is best for all they govern, to submit and obey. Thus In Eccles. 5: 19, it is said: “Where the word of a king is, there is power, and who may say to him, what doest thou?” Again, in Daniel 2: 20, it is written, “Blessed be the name of God for ever and ever: for wisdom and might are his: and he changeth the times and the seasons; He removeth kings, and setteth up kings.” Dan. 4: 32, “The Most High ruleth in the kingdom of men, and giveth it to whomsoever he will.” Thus it appears that it is by God’s will and appointment, that even bad men gain power to rule over others. And when they have gained this power, the following texts show what God requires in regard to the honour and obedience to be rendered to them.

In Matt. 22: 21, when some men came to Christ asking him whether it was their duty to pay tribute to CÆsar, who was the cruel tyrant then ruling over them. To this, Christ replied, after looking at the tribute money, “Render unto CÆsar the things that are CÆsar’s, and unto God the things that are God’s.” This means, render to CÆsar what he has power to require, just as you render your duties to God.

The Apostle Peter, by God’s authority, also teaches thus, 1 Peter 2: 13, 14, “Submit yourselves to every ordinance of man for the Lord’s sake, whether it be to kings as supreme, or unto governors, as unto them that are sent by him, for the punishment of evil doers. As free, and not using your liberty for a cloak of maliciousness, but as the servants of God.”

This command teaches us that we are to submit to every ordinance of man for the Lord’s sake. That is, when men have power to make laws, customs and ordinances, we must submit to them for the Lord’s sake—that is, in order to please and obey God. The only cases where it is right to resist is, when we are commanded to do what is sinful. It was on this principle that our forefathers, for a long time, obeyed the laws of the king of England; even when they were bad laws. But as soon as the people found they had power to make their own laws, they appointed rulers of their own, and then they ceased to obey the king of England, who had not power to force them to do it; and obeyed their own rulers, who had power given them to govern by the people. As soon, then, as it is found, that men have power given them to rule, God requires those under them to submit and obey for the Lord’s sake. This is the wisest and safest way, for it saves from constant fighting and quarrels. In the story of the shipwrecked company, we can see that it would have been better for them all, to submit to be governed by one man, even if he was a bad man, than to continue in the state of uproar, disorder and oppression that existed when there was none to rule over them.

The same sort of directions also, were given by God to domestics.

At the time these were written in the Bible, men and women were made servants by force, and their masters had power to whip, starve and murder them without punishment. God saw, that in this case, it was safest and best for servants, as well as for the whole community, that they should submit to those who had this power. Accordingly the Apostle Paul, by authority from God, gives these directions, Eph. 6: 5, “Servants, be obedient to them that are your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembling, in singleness of heart, as unto Christ, doing the will of God from the heart. With good will doing service, as to the Lord, and not to men, knowing that whatsoever good thing a man doeth, the same shall be received of the Lord, whether he be bond or free.” Here, those who were held in the most cruel bondage, were required, so long as they were in the power of their masters, to submit, and not only to serve them, but to do service “with good will,” “as to the Lord.” That means, feel kindly to your masters, and do them good, for the sake of obeying and pleasing Jesus Christ.

Again, the same apostle writes, Col. 3: 22, “Servants, obey in all things your masters according to the flesh; not with eye-service, as men-pleasers, but in singleness of heart, fearing God. And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not to men, knowing that ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance, for ye serve the Lord Christ.” Again, Paul, when teaching Titus how to perform his duties as a minister of Christ, directs thus, Titus 2: 9, “Exhort servants to be obedient to their own masters, and to please them well in all things; not answering again; not purloining, but showing all good fidelity, that they may adorn the doctrine of God our Saviour in all things.”

Another Apostle thus commands, by the authority of God, 1 Peter 2: 18, 19, “Servants, be subject to your masters with all fear, not only to the good and gentle, but also to the froward. For this is thankworthy, if a man, for conscience toward God, endure grief, suffering wrongfully. For what glory is it, if when ye be buffeted for your faults ye take it patiently? But, if when ye do well, and suffer for it, ye take it patiently, this is acceptable to God. For even hereunto ye were called; because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example that ye should follow his steps: who did no sin, neither was guile found in his mouth: who, when he was reviled, reviled not again; when he suffered he threatened not, but committed himself to Him that judgeth righteously.”

Now, consider that these directions were given to persons, taken contrary to their own wishes and the wishes of their parents, and subjected to the most degrading servitude, without any compensation. Such were required by God to “be obedient in all things,” to “please their masters well in all things;” not to answer again when reproved; not to purloin; but to show all good fidelity; to do service with good will, and not only to the good and gentle, but also to the froward; and to do all this, not for the sake of pleasing men, but to please Christ.

Now, if all this was demanded of those who were made to serve by force, what must be the duty of those who by their own will, or by the will of parents, go into a family to serve for a fair compensation previously agreed upon? They go into a family, where the house and all its furniture belong to their employers, who therefore, not only have power but a perfect right to direct how they shall be used. They put themselves freely under the direction of their employers, and agree to do their work as they wish it to be done, and they receive a reward for this service. Their employers are appointed by God, as the rulers and overseers of the family, and those they hire are under obligation to obey, in all matters relating to family work, just as a citizen is under obligations to obey rulers, when they administer the laws of the state. The master and mistress of a family are rulers of their house, just as magistrates are rulers of the people.

A gentleman of the highest standing for wealth, intelligence, and honour, obeys his rulers in all points where they have a right to direct, whether the laws are good or bad, whether the rulers are wise or foolish. So long as the people, who have the power, make such laws and appoint such rulers, he submits and obeys until he and others can get the laws and rulers changed. And every intelligent man feels that he is honoured in paying this respect to laws and rulers.

It should be just so in the family state. Whether the rulers of a family are wise or foolish, whether they make good or bad rules about their work, domestics, as long as they agree to serve them, should submit to their directions. If they do not like the rulers, or the laws of the family, still they honour themselves in obeying, until they can have a chance to change overseers and rules.

And all those directions, which were given to persons forced to service against their own wishes, are much more binding on those, who of their own accord put themselves under the direction of the rulers of a family. “Obey them that have the rule over you” is the law of God, given to domestics in the family state, as much as it is to subjects in the political state. And the only way to be freed from this obligation is, to give up your place and relation as a domestic in a family.

There is another duty owed to those who have rule over us, that in this country is not properly realized by any, except it may be by the most sensible and intelligent part of the community. It is the duty of treating all who are our superiors either in age, character, or station with respect. The Bible requires us to “honour our father and mother,” whether they are good or bad, wise or foolish. It requires us to “render honour to whom honour is due.” It requires us ever to “be courteous” whatever may be the situation of those we have to deal with.

Now the rulers and overseers of a family are placed in a situation where they are entitled to respectful treatment from all in their household, whatever may be their own character. It is of the utmost importance that children be trained to treat their parents, and all who have rule over them, or who are in any way their superiors, with respect, and this is the chief reason why it is so important for domestics to do the same, so as to set a proper example to children. And all well educated and intelligent persons so well understand the importance of rendering respectful language and manners to all who are their superiors, either in age, relationship, or station, that they always feel themselves honoured by doing it.

See that well bred gentleman! He is the governor of the state, the most learned man at the bar, the most wealthy man in the place, one whom every one honours for his talents and virtues. He is also the head and master of his own family, in which resides his father, broken down in mind by the decay of age. The aged father enters the room, and the learned and wise politician, the master of the house and the governor of the state, rises with respect, speaks to him with the greatest reverence, gives him the first place of honour and comfort, and ever treats his opinions and wishes with deference and respect. This is because this old man is his superior in age and relationship, and every one admires the son for his good breeding and sense of propriety. This same governor goes into the street and meets a worthy and respectable man, who supports himself by the labour of his hands. The governor bows to him, and addresses him with a respectful air and manner. This is because the man has a character which entitles him to respect, and all admire the governor, for his good breeding in rendering this respect.

Take another case. This governor goes out of office, and a person of small talents and little worth, by popular arts, succeeds him. There is a grand military parade, and the new governor is reviewing the troops, while the late governor is an officer under him. This former governor steps out of his ranks to the present governor and says, “Will your excellency allow me to go away a short time on some important business?” The governor replies, “Not at present, sir; I am about to order a manoeuvre and shall need your aid.” The gentleman bows respectfully to the governor, returns to his place, and instead of feeling degraded, he feels honoured in thus setting an example of respectful obedience to one, who for the time is his superior, and has rule over him. And all observers honour him, far more than they would if he had looked angry, or refused to obey his superior in command. Real gentlemen pride themselves on rendering strict obedience, and respectful language and manners to all, who are in any manner their superiors in office or relationship.

In like manner, real well bred ladies, feel it to be for their own credit to treat those with courtesy or respect, who have any claims either of character or relationship, or office. See that wealthy, well educated and well bred lady! A worthy, respectable woman comes into her house to bring home some work that she was hired to do. The lady salutes her with courtesy and respect, offers her a seat, and treats her with the same politeness of manner as she would render to the highest lady in the land. And every observer feels that this is one mark of her good breeding, which entitles her to the name of a “real lady.”

Look now at that young woman! Why does every one call her vulgar and ill bred? It is because she goes up with a careless and disrespectful air to all she meets, and her tone and manner seem to say, “I am as good as you, and I mean to let you know it.” She tells just what she thinks about them, and their conduct, contradicts their opinions flatly, and makes no effort to show that she has any respect for them or their notions. Look now at her young companion, whom all admire for lady-like manners. She always speaks in a modest and respectful tone, treats all with courtesy and respect, seems to be thinking of the convenience and comfort of others as much as of her own, and always avoids what will make those around her feel uneasy or uncomfortable. These are the manners of a lady, and if a domestic feels any ambition to be thought a well bred lady, she can gain this character in no way so surely as by adopting this style of manners.

On this point I would commend to your notice that “golden rule” so good to direct in all our pursuits: “Do unto others as you would that others should do unto you.”

Now if you ever have a family yourself, and have persons to help you, would you not think it right and proper that they should do your work as you wished it done?—and would you not feel that it was proper that your children should treat you with respect, and that your domestics should set them a proper example in this particular? No doubt you would, and therefore do unto your employers as you would that others should do unto you, if your circumstances are changed and you become employer instead of domestic.

There is an advantage to yourselves in doing this, that you are not apt to realize. A habit is the ease we acquire in doing any thing by frequently practising it. Now, as one of the chief indications of good breeding is polite and respectful manners, if you practise this mode of address to your employers, you are gradually forming a habit that will make such a mode of address easy and natural. This will be qualifying you to appear with advantage among well bred and well educated people. Now it very often happens, in this country, that a woman who goes to service, marries a sensible, industrious and business man, who, after some years, acquires that wealth and influence that bring him and his family to associate with the best educated and best bred people in the place where he lives. In this case, a person, who in the capacity of a domestic, has cultivated the manners proper for a domestic, will find that they are exactly the manners that fit her to appear like a well bred lady, in the higher sphere to which she has risen.

On the contrary, a domestic, who is rude and disrespectful in her mode of address, and unwilling to appear as if she honoured and respected those who have the rule over a family, never can appear otherwise than as a coarse and vulgar person, however much her husband’s wealth and character may raise her in society. It is therefore as much for your own advantage, as it is for that of your employers and their children, that you cultivate a habit of respectful address, and of cheerful obedience to those who hire your services.