I geeps me von leedle schtore town Proadway, und does a pooty goot peesnis; bud I ton't got mooch gapital to vork mit, so I finds id hard vork to get me all der gredits vot I vould like. Last veek I hear aboud some goots dot a barty vas going to sell pooty sheap, und so I writes dot man if he vould gife me der refusal of dose goots for a gouple a days. He gafe me der refusal; dot is, he sait I gouldn't haf dem. But he sait he vould gall on me, und see mine sthore; and den if mine schtanding in peesnis vas goot, berhaps ve might do somedings togedder. Vell, I vas behint mine gounter yesderday, ven a shentleman gomes in, und dakes me py der hant, und say, "Mr. Schmidt, I pelieve." I say, "Yaw," und den I dinks to mineself, "Dis vas de man vot has dose goots to sell, und I musd dry to make some goot imbression mit him so ve gould do some peesnis."—"Dis vas goot schtore," he says, looking aroundt; "bud you ton't got a pooty pig schstock already." I vas avraid to let him know dot I only hat 'bout a tousand tollars voort off goots in der blace, so I says, "You ton't vould dink I hat more as dree tousand tollars in dis leedle schtore, aind id?" He says, "You ton't tole me! Vos dot bossible?" I says, "Yaw." I meant dot id vas bossible, dough id vasn't so; vor I vas like Shorge Vashingtons ven he cut town der "olt elm" on Poston Gommons mit his leedle hadget, und gouldn't dell some lies aboudt id. "Vell," says der schentleman, "I dinks you ought to know petter as anypody else vot you haf got in der schtore;" und den he dakes a leedle book vrom his bocket oudt, und say, "Vell, I poots you town vor dree tousand tollars." I ask him vat he means py "poots me town;" und den he says he vas von off der daxmen, or assessors of broperty, und he tank me so kindly as nefer vos, because he say I vos sooch an honest Deutscher, und tidn't dry und sheat der gofermants. I dells you vat it vos, I tidn't veel any more petter as a hundord ber cent, ven dot man valks oudt off mine schtore, und der nexd dime I makes free mit sdrangers, I vinds first deir peesnis oudt.

Charles F. Adams.