Many reasons exist for declining invitations other than the plea of a prior engagement.

"Mrs. M. regrets ('much regrets,' or 'very much regrets') that a previous engagement prevents her having the pleasure of accepting Mrs. N.'s 'invitation,' or 'kind invitation.'" When on more intimate terms, Mrs. M. should write in the first person when declining an invitation. It is an open question whether the nature of the engagement should be stated or not. Even intimate friends often confine themselves to the statement of the bare fact only that a prior engagement exists; others, on the contrary, state the nature of the engagement, and there is no doubt that this latter course considerably softens a refusal and lessens the disappointment experienced, and therefore, when practicable, should always be followed.

When a prior engagement cannot be made the basis of a refusal, then the refusal must rest on other lines; ill health, a severe cold, etc., are valid excuses. Failing these, the refusal should be as follows:—"Mrs. Z. regrets she is unable to accept Mrs. X.'s kind invitation, etc."

It occasionally happens that it is desirable to break an engagement, circumstances having changed the aspect of things. The invitation, perhaps, was a verbal one, and a refusal was not easy at the moment.

Again, impromptu invitations are sometimes refused, having been too hastily accepted—the servant who brought the note waited for an answer, and on the impulse of the moment an affirmative answer was given; the wife had not time to consult her husband, and accepted for him as well as for herself; or perhaps some potent domestic reason that could not be explained induced a subsequent refusal.

The fashionable world accepts refusals as a matter of course, and fills up the gaps with other invitations.

Refusals of dinner invitations from those for whom a dinner party was partly originated are always disappointing, even to the most popular of dinner givers, in the same way that the absence of the principal neighbour from a county entertainment is felt to cast a shadow over the proceedings of the day.

Although printed cards of acceptance and of refusal are in general use, yet many cases arise which render written refusals imperative.

As regards the refusal of invitations asked for, such requests should not be made unless on very safe ground, and with a certainty of meeting with acquiescence, yet occasionally these requests are either unwelcome or inadmissible, and refusals are consequently given; but, unless worded with tact and good nature, they are often the cause of strained relations between both friends and acquaintances.