THE LUCK OF WEDDINGS AND MARRIAGES

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It seems only natural that many superstitions should cluster around a bride and her wedding day, since from the dawn of civilization, if not the birth of humanity, all the world has loved a lover. Every act of hers, according to lore, is fraught with significance and attended by good or evil fortune, and she is hedged round on every hand by customs and conventions as old as the hills.

LUCKY AND UNLUCKY TIMES

The season of the year is an important consideration. She must avoid Lent if she hopes for good luck, but the forty days following Easter are supposed to be extremely fortunate for the celebration of nuptials; and so is June, which takes its name from Juno, the goddess who is generally regarded as the patroness of womankind.

If she values her prospects of happiness, a bride will avoid May. The belief dates from the time of the Romans, who observed the Festival of the Dead at that time. All other religious ceremonies and observances were neglected for the time being, even the temples were closed, and those who contracted matrimony then were considered to be acting in defiance of the Fates, who revenged themselves on the foolhardy mortals. In Scotland the feeling against May marriages dates back to the time of that most fascinating and tragic figure in history, Mary Stuart, who married her third husband, the Earl of Bothwell, then aroused criticism by wearing blue and white, and lived so unhappily all the rest of her life. Superstitious people shook their heads at the temerity of King Alfonso and Princess Ena of Battenberg, who elected to be married on May 31, and were the objects of a dastardly attempt on their lives whilst on their way back to the palace.

WHEN TO MARRY

Marry when the year is new,
Always loving, kind, and true.
When FEBRUARY birds do mate
You may wed or dread your fate.
If you wed when MARCH winds blow
Joy and sorrow both you'll know.
Marry in APRIL when you can—
Joy for maiden and for man.
Marry in the month of MAY
You will surely rue the day.
Marry when JUNE roses blow
Over land and sea you'll go.
They who in JULY do wed,
Must labor always for their bread.
Whoever wed in AUGUST be
Many a change are sure to see.
Marry in SEPTEMBER'S shine
Your living will be rich and fine.
If in OCTOBER you do marry
Love will come, but riches tarry.
If you wed in bleak NOVEMBER,
Only joy will come, remember.
When DECEMBER snows fall fast
Marry and true love will last.

Another poet has given us a different version of the same theme:

Married in January's frost and rime,
Widowed you'll be before your time;
Married in February's sleety weather,
Life you'll tread in tune together;
Married when March winds shrill and roar,
Your home will lie on a foreign shore;
Married 'neath April's changeful skies,
A checkered path before you lies;
Married when bees or May-blooms flit,
Strangers around your board will sit;
Married in queen-rose month of June,
Life will be one long honeymoon;
Married in July's flower-banks' blaze
Bitter-sweet memories in after days;
Married in August's heat and drowse,
Lover and friend in your chosen spouse;
Married in gold September's glow,
Smooth and serene your life will flow;
Married when leaves in October thin,
Toil and hardship for you begin;
Married in veils of November mist,
Fortune your wedding ring has kissed;
When December's snows fall fast
Marry and true love will last.

THE LUCKY WEDDING DAY

Monday for health,
Tuesday for wealth,
Wednesday the best day of all;
Thursday for losses,
Friday for crosses,
Saturday no luck at all.

MARRIAGE DAY SUPERSTITIONS

Superstitions and customs vary greatly in different countries and periods, but they all bear somehow a strong family resemblance.

For instance, one old English proverb runs: "Blest be the bride that the sun shines on," yet in Germany a bride prays for rain, believing that a new joy comes with each raindrop, and that then all her tears will be shed before, and not after, her wedding. There, too, it used to be the custom to take a lot of old dishes to the door of the bride's house and break them to pieces in the street, and if by any chance one escaped, it was accepted as a bad omen.

In China, however, when a marriage was being arranged, and any article of value, such as a vase or a bowl, was broken the ceremony was postponed.

At the wedding feast in Scandinavia someone makes a speech or sings a song, which ends up in a tremendous noise, and this is the signal for a general peal of laughter and for the guests to present their congratulations to the newly-wedded couple.

The Slavs pour a tankard of beer over the bridegroom's horse for luck, and in the North of England, the maid pours a kettle of hot water over the doorstep to ensure that another wedding will take place ere long from the same house.

A curious idea among the Burmese is that people born on the same day of the week must not marry, and that if they defy the Fates their union will be marked by much ill-luck.

To prevent these disastrous marriages, every girl carries a record of her birthday in her name, each day of the week having a letter belonging to it, and all children are called by a name that begins with that letter.

In New Guinea it is always Leap Year, for in that island the men consider it to be beneath their dignity to notice women, much less to make overtures of marriage to them. The proposing is left to the women to do. When a New Guinea woman falls in love with a man she sends a piece of string to his sister, or, if he has no sister, to his mother or some other lady relative.

Then the lady who receives the string tells the man that the particular woman is in love with him. No courting, however, follows. If he thinks he would like to wed the woman he meets her alone and they arrange matters.

OMENS OF GOOD OR ILL

There are so many things for good or ill which the bride herself must or must not do that she would have a very anxious time keeping them all in mind if she is very superstitious. These customs begin on the eve of her wedding, when, for luck, she steps on a chair, and then mounts the table to ensure good fortune and a rise in the world.

On the morning of the day—the happy day—if she should be awakened by the singing or chirping of a bird, even of a sparrow, or by swallows sweeping past her lattice at dawn, she may accept these as signs of great good luck. She must be careful, however, not to break anything, particularly the heel of her slipper, as such things spell disagreement and trouble with her new relations.

A cat mewing betokens the same undesirable state of affairs, so she would be wise to see that it has its breakfast in time. If it sneezes, that means the best of luck.

The bride must not gaze on her reflections, however pleasing, in the mirror, after she has fully dressed. If she happens to do so, then she must put another pin in her veil, button her glove, or make some addition to her toilette, to avert evil consequences. The girl who keeps a pin removed from the bridal veil is not supposed to get married, and yet in Brittany the girl who secures one, makes sure of a speedy marriage.

If a small spider is found in the folds of the bridal gown or trousseau, it is accepted as an excellent sign that money will never be wanting in the family, but the spider should not be killed: it must be taken out of doors.

Under no circumstances may the bride read or listen to the reading of the wedding service immediately before the ceremony, not even on the day previous. She must not try on her wedding ring, and if it falls during the ceremony woe betide her. It is considered unlucky to pass a funeral on the way to church, or to meet a monk, a pig, a hare, a lizard or a serpent. On the other hand, it is a happy omen to encounter a lamb or a dove, as both of these are emblems of Christ, and the only forms into which the Evil One cannot enter, according to mediaeval superstition.

A storm of thunder and lightning during the service is regarded as fateful, and so is an open grave in the churchyard. In entering the church and returning to her home or the place where the reception is held, the bride should step with her right foot first. If she sees her groom before he sees her, she will rule him absolutely, but if he forestalls her glance, then he will be the master.

The bride and bridegroom are not supposed to meet each other until they do so at the altar, and in former times a bride did not appear at breakfast, or even emerge from her room, until she was fully attired and ready to go to church.

The forward individual who steals the first kiss before the bridegroom has had a chance to do so is supposed to ensure good luck throughout the year. It was wont to be the prerogative of the clergyman, but it seems a trifle hard on the newly-made husband.

THE ORIGIN OF MARRIAGE CUSTOMS

Since marriage is usually regarded as the chief event of life, for a woman at least, and as most women are highly superstitious, it is not surprising to find that every detail surrounding the auspicious occasion is enveloped in a web of legendary lore.

THE BRIDAL WREATH.—In ancient times in England bride and bridegroom alike wore wreaths conserved specially for their use in church, and in the thirteenth century the bridal chaplet frequently consisted of ears of corn—signifying plenty. Rosemary was considered lucky in Shakespeare's day. "There's rosemary, that's for remembrance."

ORANGE BLOSSOM.—These spotless blossoms, which betoken purity and innocence, and are symbolical of a prosperous life, are supposed to have been first brought by pilgrims from the Holy Land, and thereby possess a religious significance.

THE BRIDE'S VEIL.—This was originally a fine piece of cloth held over the couple during the ceremony. Later on it was only held over the bride, as it was supposed she was more in need of it than her bridegroom, and so it became part of her attire. In Ireland the old custom still prevails of a sprig of mistletoe, or a twig of hawthorn, being used to keep her veil in place.

THE WEDDING RING.—Since earliest times the giving or exchanging of rings cemented any and every contract. Amongst the early Christians, the thumb and first two fingers typified the Trinity, and the husband placed the ring on his wife's finger in the threefold Holy name. Some authorities believed that the third finger of the left hand was connected by a nerve or artery with the heart, hence its choice for this purpose.

THE BRIDE'S CAKE.—This important part of the wedding feast has come down to us from the Romans, who baked one compounded of flour, salt, and water, which was partaken of by the bridal pair and their friends as they witnessed the wedding contract.

THE BRIDE'S DOWRY.—The phrase "with all my worldly wealth I thee endow" dates back to primitive times when a man bartered so many head of cattle for his bride. This money, known as "dow," or "dower," was originally handed over during the ceremony, and in the course of centuries the bride's father provided its equivalent either in money or kind.

Later still the bride herself spun the linen for her portion, and was not regarded as eligible for wifehood until she had stocked a chest with her handiwork. The term spinster arose in this way, and if a girl's marriage was delayed until she was of mature age she occasionally sold the contents of her linen chest and set aside the proceeds as her dowry. The box, with a lid which is to be found in old-fashioned chests and trunks, was destined as a receptacle for money thus earned and earmarked.

THE GOING AWAY.—The rice and confetti thrown after the newly-wedded couple signifies fruitfulness and plenty, and the flowers, usually roses from which the thorns have been extracted, bestrewing their path denoted happiness, just as the orange blossom and the myrtle of the bridal bouquet were emblems of constancy and never-dying love.

THROWING OLD SHOES.—In Anglo-Saxon marriages the bride's father presented his daughter's shoe to her bridegroom, who touched her on the head with it to remind her that he was now her master. Then the throwing of shoes came to be considered a sign of good luck. "Nowe, for goode lucke caste an olde shoe after mee." The custom, too, is symbolical of the parting of the new life from the old, or of shaking the dust of a place from one's feet and severing all connection with it.

A TEAR HANDKERCHIEF.—In some parts of the Tyrol a beautiful old custom is still observed. When the bride is starting for the church, her mother gives her a fine handkerchief, woven for the purpose of the best linen possible. This is called the "Tear-Kerchief," and with it the girl is supposed to dry the tears she will naturally shed on leaving home.

After the marriage-day the "Tear-Kerchief" is folded up carefully and laid in the linen closet, where it remains till its owner's death; then it is taken out and spread over her face.

THE BRIDAL DRESS

Something old, something new,
Something borrowed, something blue.

So runs the ancient rhyme regarding the bride's wedding dress. White is the popular wear, and has been for several centuries, but previously yellow, pink, and a brilliant scarlet were frequently chosen, unless by a girl named Mary, who was expected to wear blue, the Virgin's sacred color. Some years ago, the daughter of a duke, who was united in marriage to a commoner, shocked society by insisting on a "green" wedding. In less than a year, she and her baby were buried in the family tomb.

WHICH COLOR

Married in white, you have chosen aright.
Married in green, ashamed to be seen.
Married in grey, you will go far away.
Married in red, you will wish yourself dead.
Married in blue, love ever true.
Married in yellow, ashamed of your fellow.
Married in black, you will wish yourself back.
Married in pink, your spirits will sink.
Married in brown, you'll live out of town.
Married in pearl, you'll live in a whirl.

THE BRIDEGROOM

The groom, as the secondary figure in the day's ceremonies, escapes very easily as far as superstition goes, and may do pretty well what he pleases, save letting his hat or the ring drop, both of which are very unlucky. He should carry a tiny horseshoe in his pocket, and fee the clergyman with an odd sum of money.

No one ought to hand him or his bride a telegram on the way to church, and if he wishes to be master in his own house, then he must take care to see her before she has time to catch a glimpse of him ere arriving at the altar.

MARRIAGE PROVERBS

Happy is the wooing that's not long in doing.

Marrying for love is risky, but God smiles on it.

The married man must turn his staff into a stake.

Mary in May, rue for aye.
Marry in Lent, live to repent.

Advent marriage doth deny, but Hilary gives thee liberty: Septuagesima says thee nay, eight days from Easter says you may: Rogation bids thee to contain, but Trinity sets thee free again.

Happy is the bride that the sun shines on.

My son's my son till he gets him a wife.

To change the name and not the letter is to change for the worse and not the better.

Wedlock's a padlock.

He who marrieth does well; but he who refrains from marriage doth better.

Needles and pins; needles and pins,
When a man marries, his trouble begins.

Honest men marry soon,
Wise men not at all.

Marry in haste: repent at leisure.

He who repents him not of his marriage, sleeping and waking, in a year and a day, may lawfully go to Dunmow and fetch a gammon of bacon.

It will not always be a honeymoon.

Keep your eyes wide open before marriage and half shut afterwards.

Lips, however rosy, need feeding.

Marriage with peace is the world's paradise: with strife, this life's purgatory.

Marry above your match, and you get a good master.

Marry for love and work for silver.

Marriages are made in heaven.

Don't marry for money, but seek where money is.

A man may not wive, and also thrive all in the same year.

Better be half hanged than ill wed.

He that marries for wealth sells his liberty.

He that marries late, marries ill.

He that is needy when he is married shall be rich when he is buried.

Better have an old man to humor than a young rake to break your heart.

Marry your sons when they will; your daughters when you can.

Marry your daughters betimes, lest they marry themselves.

Two heads are better than one, or why do folks marry?


                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           

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