PART II.

Previous

A Word or Two, by way of Introduction.

I have told thee, friend Bull, while discoursing of the little slips and sleights of hand in use among thy good and ancient friends, the wine and spirit dealer, the gin-shop keeper, the brewer, and the publican, that thou wouldst be satisfied that “Death was not only in the Bottle,” but that thou wouldst find that the complaint of the sons of the prophet, “There is Death in the Pot” ought not to have been confined to the narrow limits of Gilgal, but that it extends in all its operations to the illicit doings in thy own “dear native little island”—the “land of the good and the wise.” I shall now proceed to unfold to thee this part of my duty, and then I apprehend that thou wilt lay aside thy usual scepticism and incredulity, and acknowledge that I have made out to thy satisfaction the truth of my horrific title “Deadly Adulteration and Slow Poisoning; or, Disease and Death in the Pot and the Bottle.” I shall begin with the “Staff of Life.”


SECTION I.
Bread and Flour.

Good bread is light, porous, and spongy; of a sweet nutty smell; and when pressed with the finger is tough and resists the pressure like sponge, recovering with a spring its original texture as soon as the finger is removed: if any fracture appears, it is a sign of adulteration. The more numerous and large the cells or little holes are in it, the more perfectly is the bread made, and the better adapted for digestion.

Bread to be good, should be made of wheat flour; but the adulteration trade in this prime article of human consumption display no less ingenuity in the art of fraud and deception than their rivals in iniquity do in the wine and spirit and beer sophistications: convictions are on record of bakers having used pulverised gypsum or plaster of Paris, whiting, slacked lime, chalk, finely powdered granite, pipe-clay, particularly the white Cornwall clay, the flour of garden peas and horse beans, potatoes, bone-ashes, alum, spirits of vitriol, ammonia, magnesia, &c. They allege that, as they are often supplied by the mealmen with flour made from the worst kinds of foreign damaged wheat, and which is frequently mixed with a variety of other cereal grains in the course of grinding, they cannot produce bread of a sufficient degree of whiteness, lightness, and porosity, to please the caprice of the London palate, without having recourse to the conjoint aid of alum, ammonia, and potatoes.[L] This is the allegation made by the respectable part of the trade, and those who, with sufficient disposition to wickedness, are deficient in the knowledge of the art of slow and imperceptible poisoning. What excuse the irrespectable part of the trade can make for their nefarious traffic in the remaining portion of the enumerated articles must be left to the tender and honest consciences of those gentry.

“The baker,” says Mr. Accum, in his Preliminary Remarks, p. 11, “asserts that he does not put alum into bread; but he is well aware that, in purchasing a certain quantity of half spoiled flour, he must take a sack of sharp whites, (a term given to flour contaminated with a quantity of alum,) without which it would be impossible for him to produce light, white, and porous bread, from a half spoiled material.

“The wholesale mealman frequently purchases this spurious commodity, (which forms a separate branch of business in the hands of certain individuals,) in order to enable himself to sell his decayed flour.

“Other individuals (namely, the “gentlemen” druggists) furnish the baker with alum mixed up with salt, under the obscure denomination of stuff. There are wholesale manufacturing chemists, whose sole business is to crystallize alum in such a form as will adapt this salt to the purpose of being mixed with crystals of common salt, to disguise the character of the compound.

The mixture called stuff is composed of one part of alum, in minute crystals, and three of common salt.”

I omit to object to the adulteration of flour produced by the sand, which is unavoidably occasioned by the rubbing of the mill-stones together. The author of the “History of Inventions,” vol. i. p. 98, estimates that every person swallows 6lbs. yearly, in the quantity of flour and bread which he consumes.

The foregoing statement of artist ingenuity displayed by the Messieurs “Crust,” must be allowed to be liberal treatment of poor Mr. John Bull, in comparison with the acts of their rivals in the noble art of sophistication, the gin-shop-keeper, the brewer, the publican, and the other “trading interests of the nation.” But it will be better treatment to furnish the old gentleman with a test or two to enable him to detect the frauds of his said good friends, Messieurs les Crust and their compatriots, the mealmen.

The ready tests or methods for ascertaining those adulterations are: If an undue proportion (for bakers contend that the bad quality of the flour sold to them by the miller renders the addition of potatoes advantageous to the purchaser as well as to the baker) of ground or grated potatoes has been used, the bread will be moist, have a sourish smell, and, when stale, if a pressure be made upon it with the finger, a fracture will appear in the bread, that is, it will not recover its texture as sponge will do when compressed. Also, it will not keep, but in a few days become mouldy. Where bean-flour has been used, which bakers generally prefer, on account of the great portion of gluten which it contains, (and for this reason it bears a higher price in the market than flour itself,) the bread will soon dry and crack; or the fraud may be discovered by the smell on toasting a slice of the bread before the fire. The adulteration, by means of flour of peas is more common among bakers, and more difficult of detection than that of beans: the only means for ascertaining the fraud, by inspection, that I am aware of, are those of its drying and cracking soon, and being more heavy and considerably less porous than bread made entirely of wheaten flour. The admixture of clay, gypsum, chalk, whiting, slacked lime, bone-ashes, &c. is to be ascertained by the close texture, brittle or crumbly nature, undue weight, smell, and taste of the article. But analysis in each case is the truest test; and this may be performed in the following manner.

Cut the crust of the loaf into very thin slices, and, breaking these into pieces, put them into a glass cucurbit, with a large quantity of water; set this into a sand furnace, and let it stand therein with a moderate warmth for about the space of twenty-four hours. By this time the foreign ingredients will have separated from the genuine flour; the alum will have dissolved in the water, and may be extracted from it in the usual way. The jalap, if any have been used, (for it is not all the fraternity or brotherhood that have the consideration or humanity to introduce it into their life-destroying compositions,) will swim upon the top in the form of a coarse film; and the other ingredients, being heavy, will sink quite to the bottom, while the genuine flour will remain above them in the consistence of pap, which, being drawn off, will leave the adulterated articles in the form of a white powder at the bottom.

But as cucurbits and sand-furnaces are not “a part and parcel” of every family’s household chattels, if the off-hand tests above mentioned are not satisfactory, slice the loaf as before directed, and, putting the slices, with a sufficient quantity of water, into a pipkin, over a gentle fire, you will find in the course of a little time that the bread will be reduced to a pap, and, on drawing that off, the bone-ashes and other adulterating ingredients may be found in the form of a white powder at the bottom.

The pernicious ingredients, alum and spirits of vitriol, used by bakers in the manufacture of bread, are intended, in the cant phrase of the trade, “as binders and whiteners.” Few persons will credit the fact that this last-mentioned article is made use of in the manufacture of bread; but, if any person feels himself aggrieved by the assertion, I am prepared to verify my information, and point out the culprits. By the insertion of these ingredients, tens of thousands of children, under three years of age, are annually consigned to the grave in this “happy” country; and to their cause, in conjunction with the horrid articles before stated, are to be assigned the number of sudden deaths that are daily occurring, and a large portion of the diseases under which mankind are suffering.

The presence of alum may be detected by immersing a small piece of the crumb of new baked bread in a quantity of cold water sufficient to dissolve it; when, if a pernicious quantity of alum be present in the composition the water will acquire a sweet astringency to the taste; the more astringent of course the greater has been the quantity of alum used. Or a heated knife may be thrust into a loaf before it has grown cold; if the bread be free from alum, scarcely any alteration will be visible on the blade; but, should alum have been made use of, as soon as the knife cools, a slight aluminous incrustation will appear upon it. But this last method is, as Mr. Accum properly observes, but an equivocal test, on account of the impurity of the common salt used in making bread. When spirits of vitriol, diluted with water, have been used, the only test to detect this most pernicious and unprincipled adulteration is by chemically analysing the suspected article.

But the adulteration-trade observing that the insertion of the “horrid array” of pernicious articles, which their diabolical ingenuity substituted in the stead of wholesome meal or flour, had an astringent effect on the human constitution, and, fearing the consequences of a detection, have lately had recourse to the introduction of jalap into their sponge, in order to give their mischievous composition a laxative or purgative effect on the constitution of their deluded customers. The best test of the insertion of this drug is its effects. Others counteract the constipating effects of the alum by the addition of subcarbonate of potash, which neutralizes the excess of the sulphuric acid of the alum, and promotes the disengagement of the carbonic acid gas, whereby the particles of the flour are more minutely divided, and the bread rendered lighter.

Having stated the ready methods of ascertaining the good or bad qualities of bread, it is a necessary consequence that I should not be silent about those of flour.

The following are the usual tests for ascertaining the quality of flour. Grasp a handful briskly, and squeeze it for half a minute; if pure and unadulterated, it preserves the form of the cavity of the hand in one piece when placed upon the table, although it may be roughly set down. Adulterated flour, on the contrary, soon falls down. That mixed with whiting, white clay, or the like materials, is the most adhesive, though it soon gives way; but if the adulteration be ground bones, gypsum, or plaster of paris, it almost immediately falls. Where there is the presence of much bran, the grasped specimen will soon crumble, and this fraud may, also, be discovered by the colour and feel. It may also be observed that genuine flour will retain the impression of even the grains of the skin longer than that which is adulterated, the latter soon throwing off the fine marks. Also, let a person, having a moist hand, rub flour briskly between the palms of both hands; if there be whiting in it, he will find resistance; but none, if the flour is pure. Or, partially dip the fore-finger and thumb into a little sweet oil, and take up a small quantity of the flour between them; if it is pure it may be rubbed for any length of time, and will not become sticky or adhesive, and the substance will turn nearly black; but if whiting is present, it will soon be worked up into the consistence of putty, and its colour but little altered. Lemon juice, or vinegar, dropped upon flour, will also show the presence of whiting or plaster of paris; if the flour is pure it will remain at rest; but if it is adulterated an immediate commotion takes place. Where there is time to try the unsoundness of flour, put a table-spoonful into a basin and mix it with cold water, until it is of the consistence of batter pudding; then set a small pan upon the fire containing half a gill of water, and when the water is hot, pour in the batter just before it boils, and let it boil for about the space of three minutes. If sound, the flour will unite like a good pudding does; if unsound it breaks, curdles, and appears somewhat watery. By observing it while it is warm, some judgement may be formed of its different degrees of unsoundness. The usual test of people in the flour-trade is to knead a small quantity of the article; if good, an adhesive, ductile, and elastic paste is immediately formed, which may be elongated and drawn in every direction, without being entirely separated. The only ready test for the detection of sharp whites and stuff is by the taste.

When the farina of potatoes, or, as it is commonly termed, potatoe-starch, is mixed with flour, the fraud may, according to M. Chevalier, a French chemist, be discovered by sprinkling a little of the suspected article on black paper, when through a powerful lens, or microscope, the farina or starch may be discovered by the brilliancy of its particles.

To ascertain the presence of insects in flour, examine it in a good light, and if your suspicion be correct, you will observe the whole surface in motion, and on a nicer inspection there will be found in it a great number of little animals of the colour of flour, and of an oblong and a slender form. When they have once taken possession of a parcel of this commodity, it is impossible to drive them out; and they increase so fast, that the only method of preventing the total loss of the whole parcel, is to make it into bread as soon as possible. The only known way of preventing those insects from breeding in flour is to preserve it from damp; to effect which it should be always carefully and thoroughly dried before it is put up, and the barrels, also, should be carefully dried before the flour is stored in them, and placed in a room tolerably warm and dry.


SECTION II.
Meat and Fish.

The Butcher has his arts and sophistications. To make meat weigh as heavy as possible he checks the full bleeding of the victim of his knife, and to make it appear plump and white and glistening, particularly joints of veal and lamb, he inflates the cellular membrane, by blowing into it with all his might, the breath respired from his lungs: by means of which practice, should he be infected with any loathsome disease, his customers stand a very good chance of being inoculated with “the blessing.” The distension of the cellular membrane is the sign of meat having received the benefit of this operation.

Among other deceits in use among the “knights of the cleaver” is, the doctoring of joints of animals which have died of disease, by the skilful introduction of slips of fat into different parts of the joint, so as to give it the appearance of meat which had been killed in a healthy state. A recent occurrence at Guildhall has proved this practice in all its enormity, and shown that it is carried on to no trifling extent. From the same transaction it came out in evidence that the art is sufficiently extensive to employ a certain part of the “butchering craft” in its distinct mysteries. Probably by “professors of the knife and cleaver” it is considered as the ne plus ultra of butcher-skill, and has its appropriate honours and rewards. But this is known only to the initiated in the “profession.”

While discoursing of this feat of butcher-ingenuity, it seems not misplaced to observe that the sausages in London are often made out of the carcases of animals that have died. This fact, also, was brought to Mr. Bull’s knowledge, in the course of the evidence in the before-mentioned case. And I can assure my readers, that even when they are not favoured with sausages made of this savoury food, they do not often get meat in sausages better than carrion; and that more than one half of all sausage-meat consists of bone, gristle, and bread, reduced to almost an impalpable powder by means of the machine, and then worked up with a due modicum of water. Nor is this the least part of the evil. From accidental causes and the frauds of the vender, they are often poisonous. Dr. Paris has well observed, in his useful work on diet, that the viscera and intestines of animals, and also their livers, are often poisonous, while the meat of the animal is perfectly wholesome. This proves, as that gentleman well observes, that sausages are not deserving of that general use in which they are held in London: for the integument which encloses the sausage is often highly injurious to health, while the meat possesses no deleterious quality whatever. The poisonous nature of sausages arising from fraud is partly occasioned by the carelessness of the manufacturer in regard of the vessels in which he keeps his meat, but more generally from the quality of the meat which he uses. Some years ago a German chemist discovered, on analysing German sausages, that they contained a portion of prussic acid (the most potent poison known); from the eating of which several persons died. Could the exact cause have been ascertained, it would probably have been found that they were made from the meat of dead animals.

The goodness of meat depends much on the season of the year. Thus the flesh of most full grown quadrupeds is in the highest season during the first months of winter. Beef and mutton are in the greatest perfection in the months of November, December, and January. Pork is only good in winter; during the summer months it is not wholesome. Venison is in the highest season from the middle of June to the beginning of September. Lamb and veal during the summer months.

The distinguishing sign of young and old meat is, that in the latter the fat is chiefly collected in masses, or layers external to the muscles; while in the former it is more interspersed among the muscular fibres, giving the flesh a marbled appearance.

The quality of animal food is also considerably influenced by the sex; that of the female (which sooner attains perfection) being always more delicate and finer grained than that of the male, whose fibres and flavour are stronger and more rank. But this rule prevails only during the early age of the female; for, as it grows older, it gets tougher, instead of mellowing by age as the male does.

Over fat meat should not be chosen; as sheep in the first stage of the rot, or about four weeks after becoming tainted, feed inordinately, and are much disposed to fatten; which propensity graziers and butchers omit no opportunity to promote, in order to increase their profits. Excessive fatness is, therefore, no bad sign for judging of the unwholesomeness, or rather rottenness of mutton, as it is generally produced artificially.

Meat that has been over driven, and killed, as the butchers term it, on the drift, should be always rejected as unwholesome; besides, it weighs heavier than if the animal had been killed while its blood was in a healthy state; for, by the over-driving the blood has been so diffused in the cellular membrane, that it cannot be drawn off by bleeding; and the meat is heavier to the benefit of the butcher, but to the loss of the consumer. The florid colour of meat is a sign of the blood not having been properly drawn away.

The whiteness of the flesh of lamb and veal is often produced by feeding the animal with milk in which chalk is mingled, or by tying it up in a stall with a piece of chalk covered with salt constantly before it to lick. Sometimes calves are suspended by their hind legs with the head downwards for hours together, and then bled to death slowly, for the purpose of whitening the flesh. And, among the other complicated and lengthened acts of cruelty, to which avarice resorts to extract the largest possible price from the sufferings of a poor harmless creature, is the tying of calves together by the hind legs, and suffering them to remain suspended across the back of a horse, with their heads downwards, for hours together, in their way from market; a practice adopted by butchers for the purpose of rendering the meat of the body as white as possible.

Nor are fishmongers less crafty and dishonest than the other dealers in the necessaries of life. Sea-fish, particularly cod, haddock, and whiting, are subject to the operation of inflating the cellular membrane, in order to make them look plump, and increase the bulk of the fish. The imposition is detected by pressing each side of the orifice at the belly of the fish between the thumb and finger, when the air will be perceived to escape.

The signs that fish are fresh are the firmness or stiffness of the fish, the redness of its gills, and the brightness of the eyes. Whiteness of muscle and the absence of oiliness and viscidity are also signs of wholesomeness of this species of food. Flakiness and opaque appearance, with a layer of white curdy matter interspersed between the flakes, after the fish has been cooked, are signs of the goodness of turbot, cod, whiting, haddock, flounder, and sole.

The gills should also smell sweet, the fins be tight up, and the eyes not sunk. The reverse of any of these signs shows that it is stale. Thickness of flesh generally shows the good condition of fish.

Fish out of season, that is after spawning, are unwholesome; and for this reason the legislature has found it necessary to fix the periods at which the fishing of salmon and the dredging of oysters shall be lawful.


SECTION III.
Tea, Coffee, Chocolate, and Sugar.

TEA.

No article of consumption is more subject to adulteration than the pleasant one which forms the principal ingredient of the tea-table. It is not only adulterated by the Chinese vender, but it undergoes sophistication by the Chinese artist. By the former several vegetable productions, particularly a kind of moss, are mixed among genuine tea, and often sold by the antemundane subjects of “the Brother of the Sun and Moon, and The Light of Nations,” in its stead.

Among the manufacturers and venders of tea in our “fair isle”—“the land of the wise, the eloquent, the free,”—the dried leaves of the birch, ash, or elder tree, and particularly those of the privet or white thorn, and the black thorn or sloe, (both which last-mentioned specimens possess more of the qualities of the tea leaf than any other known vegetable,) are manufactured and fabricated to represent this delicious article of English female consumption: and the colouring, dyeing, and staining process is accomplished by the agency of terra japonica, logwood, verdigris, copperas, Prussian blue, carbonate of copper, Dutch pink, &c. by the English, and, it is said, even by the Chinese artist; which ingredients (namely, the five last-mentioned,) are among the most potent poisons. According to Mr. Accum’s testimony (Culinary Poisons, p. 220, note,) Mr. Twining, the eminent tea-dealer, asserts that “the leaves of spurious tea are boiled in coppers with copperas and sheep’s dung.” And it is a known fact that tea-leaves are purchased, from the London coffee houses and shops, by a regular set of men, who make their weekly rounds for the purpose, to be re-dried and coloured.

As it may be interesting to my readers to be informed of the progress of the “march of intellect” in the imitative process of preparing sham tea, and to have an opportunity of admiring the ingenuity of fraud and villany displayed in the fabrication, I shall endeavour to gratify their reasonable curiosity.

The white thorn and the sloe, or black thorn, as I have already said, are the principal leaves employed in the fabrication of the sham or imitative teas, on account of their possessing more of the qualities of the tea-leaf than any other known vegetable. From the white thorn is manufactured the green tea; and from the black thorn, or sloe, the black variety. These leaves are gathered and collected from the hedges around the metropolis, by a number of agents hired by the fabricators; and these sub-imps in the “black art” are rewarded for their honest labours with a remuneration of from one penny to twopence a pound. I have been told by one of those worthies that he is able to make between two and three pounds a week by his “vocation,” and has not “hard labour too;” for he likes, as he says, “to play oft at times a bit of the gentleman.” And, by a tea-leaf collector, I was once informed that his usual returns, or rather clear gains, were between six and seven pounds per week, and this “for only mornings’ work.” Of course, I suppose, like other large “capitalists” and “the moneyed interests,” he put on his silk stockings in the evenings, and exhibited his “sweet person” at “Almacks,” or some of the fashionable “Hells,” or “Evening,” or “Musical parties” at the “West End.” But, as to the indisputable reality of this “transmogrification,” your deponent knoweth not.

But to the subject in hand. The sloe, or black thorn, leaves are first boiled; then, when the water is squeezed from them in a press, they are baked on a flat iron plate; and, when dry, rubbed between the hands to produce the curl of the genuine tea. The colour is then produced by the application of Dutch pink, and a small quantity of logwood; when, “mirabile dictu!” “good, wholesome, nutritious black tea” is produced equal to, and probably surpassing the specimens of the monopolists of Leadenhall-street.

The process is equally rapid and efficacious in the fabrication of green tea; the leaves being boiled, pressed, and dried in the same manner as I have described, takes place with the black imitation-tea, only that the drying process is performed on plates of copper. The blueish hue or bloom observable on genuine tea is produced by mixing with the leaves Prussian blue or Dutch pink, in fine powder, while the leaves are heating upon the plates, and verdigris is added to complete the operation. The leaves are then sifted, to separate them from the thorns and stalks; and should there not be a “quantum sufficit” of the fine green bloom (the indubitable criterion of genuineness in the estimation of our “fair countrywomen,”—the ancient, as well as “the bewitching;”) the operator kindly and generously adds, more verdigris and Dutch pink or Prussian blue. And again “pure, genuine, exhilarating” green tea is produced as quick as thought, and that even in the darkness of a town cellar, some few feet under ground.

The profits on these transmutations are enormous; Mr. Accum, at p. 205 of his useful book, says that it has been stated to be from £300 to £600 per cent. And the extent to which the nefarious traffic is carried is still more surprising. According to a report of the Committee of the House of Commons in the year 1783, it is stated that “the quantity of fictitious tea which was annually manufactured from sloe and ash-tree leaves, in different parts of England, to be mixed with genuine teas, was computed at more than Four Millions of Pounds.” This computation was made when the genuine teas, sold by the East-India Company, at their sales, amounted to only six millions of pounds annually. What then must be the amount of the illicit traffic now, when the Company’s sales are about thirty millions of pounds annually! This proves that the ingenious author of the following lines, which appeared in the Literary Journal, vol. 1, p. 14, cannot be supposed to be “much out in his reckoning:”

China and Porto, now farewell;
Let others buy what you’ve to sell,
Your Port and your Bohea;
For we’ve our native sloe divine,
Whose fruit yields all our Porto wine,
Whose leaves make all our Tea.”

But John, “with all his easy gullibility,” will, no doubt say, “this is all stuff; show me proofs.” Well, John, thou art a good creature, thou wilt never believe “aught against thy enemy,” until he hath robbed thee of thy senses, and what is dearer to thee, thy “stuff.” But to prevent a too frequent repetition of thy misfortune, I will open the budget to thy admiring eyes. Look, John, over thy files of the London Newspapers, particularly the “Times” and “Courier,” from March to July, in the year 1818, and there thou mayest entertain thy optics and cerebral nerves with a goodly array of prosecutions and convictions of manufacturers and venders of factitious tea. In one instance, thou wilt read of £840 damages being given against one culprit. Nor is this all of the illicit doings, John. There have been many prosecutions and convictions since the time specified, with which I recommend thee to recreate “thy often infirmity” of incredulity. Mr. Accum, at page 203 of his work, says that, in Scotland and Ireland, the penalties imposed for this offence “amounted, during a few months, to more than fifteen thousand pounds!”

With respect to the medicinal or deleterious effects of tea on the animal economy, it would be misplaced to occupy the pages of a work of this nature with their discussion. To such of my readers as may wish to inform themselves on this subject, I recommended the perusal of “The Oracle of Health and Long Life; or, Plain Rules for the Preservation and Attainment of Sound Health and Vigorous Old Age. By Medicus;” as the intelligent author of that publication has discussed the matter with great ingenuity, and furnished a variety of hints and information calculated to be of essential service to the consumers of this most important article of Asiatic imports. Here it will be more useful to detail the ready tests or methods of detecting its adulteration. For it is an undoubted fact, as “Medicus” observes, that many of the noxious qualities attributed to tea, arise from the two-fold sophistication which it is frequently doomed to undergo both from the Chinese and English adulterator before it reaches the hands of the consumer.

Where it is suspected that tea is adulterated with the leaves of other shrubs, the fraud, if not discoverable by the appearance and fragrant odour of the article, may be detected by putting a grain and a half of blue vitriol into a cupful of the infusion, when, if it be genuine green tea, and set in a good light, it will appear of a fine light blue. If it be genuine bohea, it will turn to a deep blue, next to black; but when an adulteration has been made in either case, a variety of colours, as green, black, yellow, &c. will be seen in the samples submitted to the experiment.

Where the damaged and ordinary green teas or tea leaves have been prepared with japan earth, or other adulterating ingredients, for the purpose of giving the leaves the colour, and the infusion the tincture of bohea tea, the fraud may be detected by either of the following tests or methods: 1. A less quantity of this dyed tea will give a deeper colour to the same proportion of water than if the experimented articles were genuine. 2. The colour it gives the water will also be of a reddish brown, whereas, if the article be genuine, it should be dark. 3. When the leaves have been washed, by standing a little, they will look greener than good bohea. 4. This dyed tea is generally much larger than the genuine specimens; it is, therefore, always advisable to buy the small leaved bohea; remembering to examine whether the ingenuity of the artist has not been at work to break or crumble it into pieces, so as to disguise the size of the leaves: for the adulterator’s wits are always at work in “the black art.” 5. The liquor drawn off, which should be smooth and balsamic to the palate, tastes rougher and harsher than the genuine tea does. 6. If milk is poured into it, it will rise of a reddish colour, instead of a dark or blackish brown. 7. A little copperas put into this last-mentioned liquor will turn it to a light blue, instead of a deep blue inclining to black. 8. Spirits of hartshorn make good tea of a deep brownish colour, after it has stood awhile, similar to new drawn tincture of saffron; but the same effect does not appear when the tea is bad.

When green tea is counterfeited by dyeing bad bohea with green vitriol the cheat may be detected by the following means: 1. By putting a piece of gall into the infusion it will turn it to a deep blackish colour, which would not be the case were vitriol or copperas not present. 2. If the infusion made of this tea be of a pale green, and incline to a blueish dye, it is bad. 3. Spirit of hartshorn will give it a slight purple tinge, and precipitate a small sediment, instead of a deep greenish yellow after it has stood about half a dozen minutes. 4. Where the adulteration has been made with carbonate of copper, the fraud is detected, by shaking up a tea-spoonful of the suspected article in a phial with two tea-spoonsful of liquid ammonia, diluted with half its bulk of water; when the liquor, if copper be present, will exhibit a fine blue colour. Mr. Accum in his work, p. 219-221, gives other methods for testing adulterated tea.

As a general and ready test to distinguish genuine tea from the sloe, or black thorn, and the white thorn leaf, make an infusion of it in the common way, and then spread out some of the largest leaves to dry; when, if the tea be genuine, the leaf will appear to be narrow in proportion to its length, and deeply notched or serrated at the edges, and the end or extremity acutely pointed; while the sloe, or black thorn leaf is notched or jagged at the edges very slightly, and is obtusely pointed. Another distinction also is, that the genuine leaf is of a lively pale green colour, its surface smooth and glossy, and its texture very delicate; while the adulterated leaf is of a dark olive green colour, its texture much coarser and surface more uneven. The leaves of the white thorn, when moistened and spread, have a less resemblance to the genuine tea-leaf than is the case with the sloe-leaf. The leaves of the other imitative or sham teas have still a less resemblance, and for this reason they are but seldom used. With respect to the different kinds of tea imported from China the shape of the leaf is the same in all of them, though its size varies; for all the varieties are the produce of the same plant; the difference of quality and properties depend chiefly on the difference of climate, soil, culture, age, time of gathering, and mode of drying the leaves. The difference of the size of the leaf is occasioned in a great measure by the different seasons at which it is gathered.

COFFEE.

Several substitutes are vended by the grocers and coffee-dealers, instead of the coffee-berry, when purchased in a ground state, or allowed to pass through the vender’s mill. Among many others may be mentioned ground dried acorns, horse-chestnuts, horse-beans, pigeon-beans, peas, nuts, barley, rice, wheat, parsnips, carrots, &c. but the best imitation of the real berry is obtained by roasting blue succory, or rye, with the addition of a few almonds. As all these articles, however, have but little resemblance in flavour to real coffee, except what they acquire from the torrefaction, and their empyreumatic oil, they are seldom vended solely by themselves, except to the coffee-shops of London, or those whom the dealers consider as “a plucked pigeon,” but are ingeniously mixed with a portion of the genuine berry.

Friend John will, no doubt, as usual, call to his assistance his native incredulity, and ask for proof against his “pals,” the grocer and coffee-dealer. To satisfy his just curiosity let him look to the same file of papers to which he was referred respecting tea, and there he will have no reason to be longer hard of belief. He will there find that one “gentleman grocer,” disliking the trouble of grinding horse-beans, pigeon’s beans, &c. proceeded by short hand, and threw in a dash (not a pinch) of gravel or sand; for which act of kindness towards his customers he was convicted in the penalty of £50. See the case of The King against Chaloner, a tea and coffee dealer.

But, probably, John, when he finds himself no longer able to cling to his strong hold—incredulity—will exclaim, shew us, then, your chemical test and analysis.—Ah! John, the coffee sophisticator is too much for us; his art is beyond the reach of short or long tests, or of hard or easy ones: he may do as he likes, unless thou canst put thy hoof upon some of his nicely packed-up parcels; and to accomplish this purpose thou, or thy representative, the poor, badly-paid, half-starved, ill-requited Excise-officer, must detect him in his machinations on his own proper “dominium” or “natale solum:” scarcely any other detection will satisfy that old lady’s scrupulosity and exactness—that “golden calf” of thy idolatry—that “all perfect and superhuman mass of incongruity and intricacy”—the law. Thou, therefore, seest plainly that the only certain way to have a drop of the “pure stuff” is to purchase the berry in its raw state and roast it, and what is still more important, to grind it thyself. But, if thou dost not understand all these processes to a-t—, thou mayst find them, with some other very interesting arcana of the science, detailed in a work which I shall shortly publish for the instruction and guidance of housekeepers of all kinds and descriptions, and which I shall entitle “The Housekeepers’ Guide to Domestic Comfort, Household Management, and Practical Economy.” This, John, I intend shall be a rare work—quite a tit-bit for thy fancy; and the price a mere “four-penny matter.” It shall not be a “marrowless collection of shreds and patches, and cuttings and pastings,” selected or stolen out of old useless books, but a collection of practical facts, conducing to domestic comfort and real economy.

As I must, friend John, have, by the foregoing particulars, alarmed thy coffee-drinking propensities, it is but fair to let thee into the secret of ascertaining good coffee.

Know then, friend Bull, and all ye little Bulls, who may have the satisfaction of deriving your paternity from that ancient and honourable stock, that coffee, commercially considered, is of three sorts: the Arabian, or Mocha coffee, the East-Indian coffee, and the West-Indian coffee. Of these, the Mocha, or Turkey, coffee is generally esteemed the best, and is so stated by all the writers on the subject; but this is not the case: for the Java coffee is considered, by all competent judges, to be superior, as it contains a considerably larger proportion of oil. Among the East-Indian species, that of Bourbon is preferred. Of the West-Indian produce, the growth of the French colonies is most esteemed, particularly that of Martinique. The coffee of Surinam, Berbice, Demerara, and Cayenne, is the least valued. The inferiority of the coffee of the British colonies is supposed to be occasioned by its being put to dry in houses where sugar and rum are kept, or by being set in vessels freighted with those commodities, or other substances of a strong scent, from which the coffee imbibes the flavour.

Mocha, or Turkey, coffee (namely, in a raw or unroasted state) should be chosen of a greenish olive hue, fresh and new, free from any musty smell, the berries of a middling size, and clean and plump. Good West-Indian coffee should also be of a greenish cast, fresh, free from mouldy smells, and the berry small. East-Indian coffee is of a pale, and partly of a deep yellow colour. Java coffee is distinguished by its being a large, light, yellow berry.

These are the general tests or methods for ascertaining the quality of raw coffee; those for roasted are similar as to the size of the berry: the other criteria are that it should not be too much roasted, but of a bright chestnut colour, and of a fresh fragrant smell.

I cannot, I apprehend, close this article more appropriately and serviceably, than by exhorting my readers to recollect that the presence of any of the adulterating ingredients in coffee is of the greatest prejudice to health, and is apt to cause a distressing weight on the stomach if the adulterated coffee be used daily for some time. The detail of the beneficial and injurious effects is ably stated in “The Oracle of Health and Long Life.”

CHOCOLATE.

Chocolate is frequently adulterated with noxious ingredients, particularly vanilla and castile soap; the first article is used for giving it a fragrant odour, and the second for causing it to froth when it is dissolved in the water: a large proportion of flour, also, instead of the kernel of the cocoa-nut, makes up the composition.

Chocolate, to be good, should be of a brown colour, inclining to red; when broken, it should appear of a smooth and uniform consistence in the fracture, without any granulated particles, and should melt easily in the mouth, leaving no roughness or astringency, but rather a cooling sensation upon the tongue; which last quality is the most decisive criterion of its genuineness.

SUGAR.

Considerable ingenuity is exerted in the adulteration of sugar. The moist sugars are mixed up with sand, salt, flour, and a variety of other ingredients of little or no cost. The loaf, or lump sugar receives the addition of lime, chalk, gypsum, plaster of paris, or any white material which will save expense to the “refiner.”

Lump, or loaf sugar, to be good, should be close, heavy, and shining: though, by the bye, some of the craft have lately contrived to introduce some sparkling particles of marble, to produce the shining appearance. That which easily breaks, and appears porous or spongy and of a dull cast, has not been properly manufactured, and has an undue proportion of lime, &c. in its composition. Of the moist kind, chuse that which is distinguished by the sharpness, brightness, and loose texture of the grain, and which, when rubbed between the finger and the thumb, is not easily pulverized: those kinds are to be preferred which have a peculiar grey hue, in conjunction with the brightness and other criteria just mentioned. The soft and close grained sugars, though of a good colour, should be rejected as saturated with too much earthy matter. The East India varieties do not contain so much saccharine matter as the produce of the West India colonies. Neither is the crush-lump, which is manufactured from treacle and employed by grocers for mixing with the common sorts of brown sugar, equal to the West India produce in sweetening power. Adulterated sugar is readily discovered by the taste and sediment left at the bottom of the vessel in which it is dissolved. The presence of crush-lump may be recognized by the uniformity of the appearance of moist sugar.

Rules for the choice of currants, raisins, rice, and other articles of grocery, are detailed in “Domestic Comforts and Economy,” a work containing a store of information for the economizing and skilful management of household expenditure.


SECTION IV.
Spices.

PEPPER.

Pepper is subject to adulteration, like most other articles of consumption. The spurious pepper consists of chalk, flour, ground mustard-seed, &c. mingled with a certain portion of the genuine berry, a quantity of pepper dust, or the sweepings of the pepper warehouses, mixed with a little Cayenne pepper; the whole being made into a cohesive mass by means of mucilage. Even the whole berry has not been able to escape the ingenuity of sophistication. The adulterated berry is manufactured of the hulls of mustard-seed, or oil-cakes composed of the residue of lint-seed, from which the oil has been pressed, glue, common clay or chalk, and a certain quantity of stuff known and purchased in the market under the name and cabalistical abbreviations of P. D. or D. P. D., the first mentioned of which delectable ingredients is the dust which falls from the pepper-corns by their rubbing against each other in their voyage from the place of their growth to that of their importation; the other is the sweepings or refuse of the pepper warehouses. The first abbreviation signifies pepper dust; the second, dirt of pepper dust. The mode of manufacturing these inviting ingredients is to granulate the mass by pressing it through a sieve, and then to roll the grains about in a cask until they take a globular form. “Artists” are then employed to stick into each pepper-corn little sprigs, in order to simulate the appearance of the genuine berry. This practice was long carried on in London, without the least interruption or suspicion of the fraud on the public and the revenue, until the collection of the duties was, in the year 1819, transferred from the Customs to the Excise; when, on that occasion, several convictions of the offenders took place, which may be seen in the newspapers published about that period.

Pepper is of two kinds, the black and the white. Black pepper should be chosen large, heavy, firm, and not much shrivelled. White pepper is either factitious or genuine: the former is the ripe and perfect berry, prepared by steeping in sea-water and urine the best and soundest grains of black pepper for about the space of a week, when the skin or rind bursting, they are taken out and exposed to the heat of the sun until the skin or outer bark loosens, when they are rubbed with the hand till the rind falls off. The internal kernels are next perfectly dried in the sun, and then they are fit to be ground or manufactured into white pepper, together with such foreign ingredients as the conscience or ingenuity of the adulterator may suggest. The genuine white pepper consists of the blighted or imperfect berries of the same plant as produces the black pepper; but as it does not possess a strength and pungency, even when not adulterated, equal to the common black pepper, it is by no means preferable to that variety for domestic purposes, except where appearance is consulted, as in the case of its being brought to table. In fact, white pepper is always, whether genuine or factitious, inferior in flavour and quality to black pepper; and where it is factitious, its peculiar flavour and pungency are nearly lost.

Where the berries are supposed to be factitious, the readiest way of detecting the fraud, (independent of the deterioration of quality and flavour, which must be evident to every judge of the genuine article,) is to throw a few of the pepper-corns into a little water; when the artificial produce will swell up and soon become soft and sticky, and on the least degree of agitation will dissolve or fall to powder, while the genuine corns will remain whole and unaffected.

The same precaution that I have said should be observed by the purchasers of coffee—namely, never to let it pass through the mill of the grocer or vender, should also be observed in the purchase of pepper. When the cunning varlets have none of the adulterated pepper-corns by them, they will be sure of exerting some sleight-of-hand in slipping into the mill some of the before-mentioned sophisticating articles, or flour, or powdered hemp-seed or rape-seed cake, or ivory black, or the hieroglyphical P. D. or D. P. D. (if they are not already patiently waiting in the mill to lend their services as make-weights;) notwithstanding the poor purchaser may suppose himself lynx-eyed, and proof against imposition.

Another article of the pepper kind, friend John, with which thou art fond of tickling thy delicate appetite, and of exhibiting on “gaudy days,” as the sons of Alma Mater phrase it, in thy well polished castors, to thy admiring guests, like a sparkling star to be found only in the remotest part of the heavens, is the subject of sophisticating roguery. What thinkest thou, John, of the “dear bought,” “far fetched,” “long sought,” “gentleman-like” Cayenne pepper, which thou often wrappest up in as many folds of paper as an onion hath coats, that it should not lose its virtue, being adulterated with “red lead,” to prevent the delectable mass of which it is composed from becoming bleached on exposure to the light. I was thinking, friend Bull, to furnish thee with a test for discovering the fraud, but as I know of no one better than that given by thy expatriated countryman, the much injured Accum, I must refer thee to his book, 4th edition, p. 247. Perhaps the following extract from that excellent work, (the only book on cookery extant, that can be safely trusted to; for the genius of cookery is, believe me, John, in colleague with the spirit of sophistication against thy health; and for a confirmation of this assertion thou needest only look to the formulÆ given in cookery books for imparting a fresh and lively green colour or hue to pickles—not to mention the consequences of the concentration of the virtues of certain articles, which, though harmless, while used in their original and simple state, are, as the author of the “Oracle of Health and Long Life” observes, in their concentrated state, potent poisons;) the Cook’s Oracle, by the late Dr. Kitchener, will be better adapted to thy wants and taste.

“We advise those who are fond of Cayenne not to think it too much trouble to make it of English chillies—there is no other way of being sure it is genuine.—They will obtain a pepper of much finer flavour without half the heat of the foreign; and a hundred chillies will produce two ounces. The flavour of the chillies is very superior to that of the capsicums. Put them in a warm place to dry, then rub them in a mortar, as fine as possible, and keep them in a well stopped bottle.”

Wholesome and economical receipts for making most of the other articles vended in oil shops will be found in the same useful work. Buy the work, John, thou wilt have no reason to begrudge the price; it is equally valuable to the man of “high” or “low estate;”—to him to whom dinner is the chief business of the day, who merely lives to eat, than eats to live—who seeth the sun rise with no other hope than that he should fill his belly, before it sets, who is not satisfied till he is surfeited; as well as to the man who lives according to old English hospitality, and eateth merely to satisfy nature and his better health.

CLOVES.

Great fraud is often practised by the vender in the sale of this commodity, either by depriving the cloves of their oil, which is easily drawn from them either by distillation or by simple pressure, or by causing them to imbibe or absorb a quantity of water a short time previous to their sale. When the oil has been extracted, the fraud may be discovered by the cloves appearing shrivelled, light, of a paler colour than their usual dark brown hue when perfect, without the ball or knob at the top, and with little taste or smell. When they have been forced to imbibe water for the purpose of increasing their weight, the adulteration may be detected by pressure between the fingers, and by the flavour and fragrance of the exudation. When good and bad cloves have remained long intermingled, the bad gradually absorb oil from the good, in which case the fraud becomes difficult of detection.

The clove to be in perfection should be large sized, plump, heavy, of a fine fragrant smell, and a hot aromatic taste, not easily disappearing off the tongue; easily broken, and when pressed between the thumb and finger should leave an oily moisture upon them, producing a slight sensation of smarting.

CINNAMON.

Cinnamon is adulterated by either mixing cassia bark with it, or a portion of the genuine article, which has been deprived of its essential oil by distillation.

Good cinnamon is smooth and thin, not much thicker than royal or stout writing paper, and rather pliable; of a light yellowish cast, inclining to red, a fragrant aromatic smell, and an agreeable sweetish taste. Thick, hard, brownish coloured specimens, of hot, pungent, or a bitter taste, should be rejected.

The cassia bark, which bears a great resemblance to cinnamon, is thicker, of a coarser texture, breaks short and smooth; whereas cinnamon breaks fibrous and splintery. The best method, however, of distinguishing cinnamon from cassia is by the taste. Thus, when cassia is taken into the mouth, it forms a sweet mucilage, and seems, when good, to dissolve almost entirely, whereas cinnamon has a bitter taste, and produces a bitter dryness in the mouth.

Criteria for judging of nutmegs, ginger, mace, &c. will be found in “Domestic Comforts and Economy.”


SECTION V.
Pickles, Vinegar, Oil, Mustard, Anchovies, Catsup, Isinglass, Soap, Candles, Blue or Indigo, Starch, Bees Wax, &c.

PICKLES.

Among the poisonous articles daily vended to the public, none are of more potent effect than the pickles sold by unprincipled oilmen. For the purpose of giving a fresh and lively green colour or hue to those stimulants of the palate, they are intentionally coloured by means of copper or verdigris, or at least placed for a considerable time in copper or brazen vessels for the purpose of allowing the articles to be impregnated by the joint action of the metal and the vinegar. The cookery books (save and except “The Cook’s Oracle”) in vogue also direct the “lovers of good cheer” to boil their pickles in bell metal or copper pots, or to boil halfpence or a bit of verdigris with them, in order to impart a green colour! Ought not the authors, whose gender seems “doubtful,” and Messieurs les Bibliopoles, of those pests, to be indited for a nuisance and malice prepense to the loving subjects of our late “good old king?”

The ready way to detect the presence of copper in these articles is to pour a little liquid ammonia, diluted with an equal quantity of water, over a small quantity of the suspected pickle reduced into small pieces, and placed in an enclosed phial or vessel; when, if the pickles contain the minutest quantity of copper, the ammonia will assume a blue colour.

VINEGAR.

Vinegar is adulterated with sulphuric acid, muriatic acid, nitric acid, oil of vitriol, a variety of acrid vegetable substances, and frequently contains metallic impregnations of lead, tin, pewter, iron, and copper, from the stills or vessels in which it is made. Its more harmless adulteration is a considerable dilution with water.

Vinegar is prepared from a variety of substances; but its common preparations are from wine, fruits, malt, sugar, and wood. The vinegar made from wood is the strongest, containing at least eight times the strength of the common preparations. It is perfectly colourless, and its taste is very pungent and grateful. But the vinegar generally prepared for sale in this country is made from malt; which to be good should be of a pale brown colour, perfectly transparent, of a pleasant and rather pungent acid taste, but without acrimony, and a fragrant grateful odour. These are the readiest and best tests of good vinegar. But as a false strength is frequently given to it by adding oil of vitriol, sulphuric acid, or the extract of some acrid vegetable, as pellitory of Spain, capsicum, &c. or metallic extracts, the tests for ascertaining these foreign substances are as follow: If it is suspected that vinegar is adulterated with oil of vitriol, put three or four drops of acetate of barytes into a glass of vinegar; filtrate the white precipitate thereby produced through paper, and heat the powder or residuum remaining in a tobacco-pipe until it is red hot. Then put it into spirit of salt or diluted aqua-fortis; if the precipitate dissolves, the vinegar is genuine; if not, it is adulterated. But if metallic adulteration is suspected, add liquid ammonia to the vinegar, until the odour of the ammonia predominates; if the mixture assumes a blackish tint, it is a sign that copper is present in the article. If the presence of lead be suspected, add water impregnated with sulphuretted hydrogen to the suspected vinegar; if the mixture becomes black or yields a black precipitate, your suspicion is well founded.

OLIVE, or FLORENCE OIL.

Olive oil is frequently adulterated by mixing with it the oil of poppy seeds or a decoction of cucumbers, which latter ingredients easily unite with the oleaginous substances. It is frequently impregnated with lead, from the circumstance of the fruit which yields the oil being compressed between leaden plates, and the oil being suffered to remain in pewter or leaden cisterns in order to become clear before it is offered for sale. This last injurious quality is communicated afresh to the commodity by the retail venders, who frequently keep a pewter vessel immersed in the oil, for the purpose, as they assert, of preserving the liquid from becoming rancid. It is however proper to state that the metallic contamination by the wholesale manufacturer chiefly belongs to the Spanish produce: the French and Italian manufacture is usually free from the impregnation.

The presence of lead or any metal deleterious to health is detected, by shaking in a stopped phial some of the suspected oil with a quantity of water impregnated with sulphuretted hydrogen, in the proportion of one part of the former to two parts of the latter ingredient; when the oil, if adulterated, will become of a dark brown or black colour. When the oil of poppy seed, or the decoction of cucumber, is supposed to have been made use of in the adulteration, their presence may be ascertained by exposing the mixture to a freezing temperature, when the olive oil will become frozen, while the adulterating ingredient will remain fluid.

The best olive oil is of a bright pale amber colour, somewhat inclining to a greenish cast; free from sediment, bland to the taste, and without smell.

SALT.

Salt is frequently adulterated with sulphate of lime, for the purpose of making it weigh heavier, appear lighter, and less liable to become moist.

MUSTARD.

“Genuine mustard,” says Mr. Accum, (Culinary Poisons, p. 330) “either in powder, or in a state of paste ready made, is perhaps rarely to be met with in the shops.” Whether “patent,” “best Durham,” or of any other pretty and imposing name, it generally consists of a composition of mustard flour and wheaten flour; only for the additional cost of the “patent mustard” of the respective manufacturers, the purchaser is treated with a little cayenne pepper, a large quantity of bay salt, and a quantum sufficit of “aqua pura.” Turmeric is the grand adulterant of the merchant for giving the yellow colour to factitious mustard. The flour of mustard of the shops generally consists of the produce of mustard seed, cayenne pepper, wheat flour, and turmeric; and the essence of mustard of the fashionable oilmen is composed of camphor and oil of rosemary, dissolved in oil of turpentine, with the addition of a little of the flour of mustard!

ANCHOVY SAUCE.

Anchovy sauce is frequently contaminated with the pigments denominated Venetian red or Armenian bole, which are rubbed into the mass, while the operator is triturating the anchovy in his mortar. The Venetian red, which is frequently adulterated with red lead, affords the deepest and finest colour, and is accordingly used by the fashionable oilman; the aid of the Armenian bole is invoked by his more conscientious and less aspiring brethren.

But the anchovy itself is not exempt from the sophisticating ingenuity of the trade; for sprats are frequently prepared and sold for anchovies. The best way of discovering the fraud is by the appearance of the back bone, which in the anchovy is triangular for some space from the head, while that of the sprat is flat.

The test for detecting the fraud practised in the manufacture of anchovy sauce is the same as that which will be presently stated for discovering the adulteration of mushroom catsup.

MUSHROOM CATSUP.

This common article of consumption is frequently contaminated by copper. This deleterious quality it obtains from the mode of its manufacture, as well as from the articles from which it is manufactured.

The usual way in which it is prepared is by boiling in a copper the residue left in the still of the vinegar manufacturer, with a decoction of the outer green shell of the walnut (previously prepared also by having been boiled in a copper, in combination with common salt;) together with a portion of allspice or pimento, pepper dust, (or cayenne pepper, should the manufacturer be a man of taste;) and garlic.

The method of detecting the fraud is detailed at page 294 of Mr. Accum’s book: it is too long for insertion here.

ISINGLASS.

Isinglass, which is prepared from the air-bladders of the sturgeons, is the subject of sophistication. The dried bladders of horses, the skins of soles, and the intestinal membranes of calves and sheep are frequently sold for it. The fraud may be detected by boiling the shreds in water; when, if the article is adulterated, the spurious ingredients will obtain only an imperfect insolubility, whereas genuine isinglass is almost perfectly soluble in water.

Isinglass to be good, should be white, perfectly transparent, dry, fibrous, and of a faint odour and insipid taste. The best variety occurs in the form of a lyre or horse-shoe; the worst, flat, in the form of a pancake. The saltish taste of fictitious isinglass is also another of the criteria for judging of its goodness.

BLUE or INDIGO.

This article is subject to great adulteration by the introduction of foreign ingredients into its manufacture. The easiest and speediest test of its genuineness is by dissolving or cutting it. By the first method, if good, it dissolves easily, while that of a coarse or an adulterated kind dissolves with difficulty, and settles at the bottom of the vessel. By the second method, (and which is the best criterion of its goodness,) when cut with a knife, it exhibits a red copper-like appearance. Where this shade is absent or only very slight, the indigo is of an inferior quality.—Other signs of its goodness are that it should be light, of a close texture, break easily, float on water, be free from white specks or sand, and from white adhesive mould externally, and when rubbed with the nail, it should have a shining copper-like hue.

SOAP.

Soap is subject to great adulteration, as every person is aware who has had an opportunity of witnessing the specimens made twenty years ago, before “Messieurs les Artistes” had made their prodigious advances, as our “Yankee” brethren across the Atlantic phrase it, “in the progressing knowledge of the age.”

Good mottled soap is hard, but not brittle, well mottled, and without any rancid, tallowy, or unpleasant acrid smell. If any of this smell should be present, there has been an undue portion of soda or potash used in the manufacture. A quantity of fuller’s earth is often used to conceal the imperfections and add to the weight of the article, by enabling it to imbibe a large quantity of water. Rancid tallow also is often used in soap and candle-making, which has had a portion of its substance quite destroyed by putrefaction. Of course the articles from which it is made are of a very inferior quality. Those specimens which have a disagreeable odour are made of horns of animals, woollen rags, &c. instead of oil, clay often supplies the place of tallow.

There are several methods for proving the quality of soap. The author of “The Maidservant’s Companion and Directory” informs us that there are “some people who can ascertain it by the taste.” But as the same gentleman observes, as it is not likely that many persons will feel a pleasure in making the experiment, a more pleasant method is to slice an ounce or two of the soap very thin into a basin, and having poured boiling water upon the slices, to stir them well till they are quite dissolved; then place the basin and contents before the fire for the space of about twelve hours. When the mixture is quite cold, turn it out of the basin; if no sediment appears at the bottom, it is a sign of the goodness of the soap. Or the adulteration of the soap may be detected, by pouring upon a little of the suspected article, thinly sliced into a bottle, rectified spirit of wine, in the proportion of one part of soap to six parts of spirit: then, when the bottle, being slightly stopped, has remained a short time in a warm place, the adulterated parts of the soap will appear unacted upon by the agent; but if the soap be genuine, it will have become wholly dissolved.

To those who are desirous of economizing the consumption of soap, many useful hints may be found in “The Maidservant’s Companion and Directory;” a work which every sensible master and mistress should cause to be carefully and attentively perused by their domestics.

CANDLES.

Nor are candles exempt from the sophisticator’s art. Tallow candles, to be good, should be made of equal parts of bullock’s and sheep’s fat; which is discoverable by their being of a firm texture, a good white colour, and not an obnoxious smell. When made of hog’s fat, they gutter, emit an ill smell, and a thick black smoke. If alum or pulverized marble has been mingled with the tallow, for the purpose of giving a white appearance and a hard consistence, the wicks burn with a dead light, and the alum spits or emits slight explosions from the wick as it burns.

Some useful directions respecting the management and the economizing of the consumption of candles, whether wax, mould, or dips, are to be found in “Domestic Comforts and Economy.”

STARCH.

This commodity is subject to much adulteration by the manufacturer. When good, it is dry, easily reducible to powder, tasteless, and without odour. In its use in the laundry, there is no good housewife but can distinguish, by its effects on her “lavatory occupations,” the difference between good and bad starch: it is therefore unnecessary to detail tests.

BEES’ WAX.

Bees’ wax is frequently adulterated with rosin, tallow, pease-meal, potatoe-starch, and a mixture of oil and litharge. The introduction of rosin into it may be discovered by its hardness, brittleness, and want of tenacity. When adulterated with tallow, the fraud may be detected by scratching the finger over the surface; when its clamminess and adhesiveness to the fingers will indicate the presence of that ingredient. In the purchase of cakes of bees’ wax the cake should be broke, in order to ascertain whether the impurities called foot, are not ingeniously encased in a shell of pure wax. White wax is adulterated with carbonate of lead and white tallow, to increase its weight.

Bees’ wax, when good, is of a compact substance, somewhat unctuous to the touch, but not adhering to the fingers or to the teeth when it is kneaded or chewed: and when scratched by the finger-nail, no obstruction is met with, and but little indentation or fissure made; it also has an agreeable smell partaking of a slight odour of honey, and a clear fresh yellow colour. Its texture is also granular.


Butter is not exempt from adulteration: the inferior kinds are frequently mixed up with hogs-lard which has lost its flavour and appearance; and not unfrequently kitchen-stuff forms a portion of the bulk.

Good butter is hard and firm; therefore that butter which is often sold in the shops in London, that adheres to the knife when applied to, or stuck into it, is factitious, that is, manufactured in a machine, of the following materials—viz. rancid fresh butter, the cheap unsaleable Scotch butters of various hues and dyes, and a quantity of salt, well rummaged and pomelled together. This spurious commodity is of a white cast, and generally sold under the denomination of “Dorset.” It should be recollected that the cheesemongers never beat the good butters, as the beating injures the flavour; they bestow their friendly castigations only on the worthless commodity for the purpose of extracting a portion of its rancidity and obnoxious smell.

Butter should be bought by the taste and smell. Both fresh and salt butter should smell sweet, and be of an equal colour throughout; if veiny and open, it has been mixed with a staler or an inferior sort. The quality of tub butter is ascertained by putting a knife into the butter; and if, on drawing it out, any rancid or unpleasant smell should attach to the knife, the butter is not good; but, perhaps, the best criterion is to taste the butter near the sides of the tub, for the middle is often sweet when the parts near the sides of the tub are quite rank.

Hogs-lard is adulterated with the skimmings of the liquor in which pork or bacon has been boiled. Lard thus adulterated has a grey colour, a soft consistence, and a salt taste; whereas lard, when pure, is white, granular, and rather firm in texture.

CHEESE, BACON, AND HAMS.

When annatto is dear, or of inferior quality in appearance, it is customary with the venders of the article to adulterate it with vermilion or red lead. This contamination has chiefly been confined to the Gloucester cheese; and may be detected by macerating a small quantity of the suspected article in water impregnated with sulphuretted hydrogen, acidulated with muriatic acid; which will immediately cause the cheese to assume a brown or black colour, if the minutest portion of lead be present. I am informed by a respectable dealer, that cheese, especially old Stilton cheese, is frequently greened in particular parts with verdigris, in order to assume the appearance of age.

The best cheese is that which is of a dry compact texture, without holes in it; of a whitish colour, and which, on being rubbed between the finger and thumb, almost immediately becomes a soft and somewhat greasy mass. Nor is a moist smooth coat a bad criterion of its quality. It should also be of a moderate age; for neither very decayed, nor decaying cheese, is wholesome; nor is that which is new, adhesive, and ropy, when heated by the fire, of a good kind. Cheshire cheese which crumbles and tastes bitterish has been made of bad milk. Though cheese is generally chosen by the taste, this is by no means a criterion of its nutritive qualities; as the flavour generally depends on the nature of the food which the cows eat, and often on the mode of management in the manufacture of the cheese.

In the purchase of bacon and hams, pray bear in mind, friend John, that many more thousands of tons of those articles are sold annually in the metropolis of this land of “just and equal dealing” as “fine, new Hampshire bacon and fine Yorkshire hams,” than are received from those counties altogether; and that though the bacon merchants are supplied with bacon from Ireland, none sell Irish bacon. The large Irish hams are also dried and sold for “fine fresh” Yorkshire or Westmoreland varieties, to tickle the fancy of the “Bull Family” for rarities and expensive purchases.

MILK AND CREAM.

The usual sophistication of milk is a liberal quantity of warm water, and to give consistence to the mixture, and correct the colour, a composition of flour and yolks of eggs is added; but should there not have been sufficient time for the operation, the immediate aid of the cock or the pump is invoked. But some of the more skilfully initiated “artistes au lait” dissolve the common cheese dye, annatto, which occasions a mixture of milk and water to assume the colour, and nearly the consistence of cream. Among some of the less expert a composition of treacle and salt supplies the place of the annatto; but this mixture does not combine so well as the annatto with the milk. Pure milk is of a dull white colour, and a soft sweetish taste; adulterated milk is of a bluish appearance and thin consistence.

Cream receives a copious addition of skimmed milk, flour, starch, rice-powder, or arrow-root boiled together, to increase the “milk-merchant’s” profits. But arrow-root is the substance which is best adapted, and most employed for the purpose. The generally received opinion that milk is adulterated with chalk and whitening is, as Mr. Accum observes, erroneous; for neither of those ingredients could be held in solution in the milk, and would therefore be useless to the adulterator, as they would sink to the bottom of the pail while the manufacturer was doling out his composition to his customers. But the practice of putting the milk into leaden pans, or vessels made of that metal, to occasion the milk to throw up a larger portion of cream, is sufficiently authenticated, and deserves exposure, from the liability of having the milk impregnated with particles of lead.

Perhaps some of my readers may be lovers of curds and whey; if so, I recommend them to endeavour to get a sight of the calf’s maw, from which the rennet is made before it is boiled. I have had the fortune of being “blessed” with “the captivating sight” more than once; and in each instance I absolutely saw the bladder moving alive with maggots.

POTATOES, FRUIT, &c.

Even the humble green-grocer exerts his ingenuity and “tact” in the art of sophistication: to augment the weight of his “murphies,” and “make them tell,” he soaks “the dear cratures” in water during the night previous to their sale.

While discoursing of the little peccadilloes of the honest tradesmen of “this land of Christianity,” I never apprehended that it was possible to sophisticate fruit. But at the very moment I was about to consummate my bold, and I hope it will prove, patriotic undertaking, by affixing the important and consolatory, though little word, “Finis,” a new discovery presented itself to my astonished optics! Can you believe me, John? I happened to pop in rather inopportunely, that is to say, a-la-mode Paul Pry, on a fruit-artist, who was preparing some stale plums for sale, and giving them all the bloom and fragrance of having been just plucked from the tree. This recondite feat of fruitist-ingenuity consists in anointing certain parts of the fruit with gum water, and then shaking a muslin bag containing finely powdered blue upon the prepared parts of the fruit, which are laid uppermost upon a board, to receive the precious unction.—From the honest tradesman whom I thus found patriotically engaged in furthering “the trading and commercial interests of his dear native land,” I also learned that some of the more skilful and enterprizing artists soak plums in water, when they have become shrivelled, in order to plump them out, and make them, as it is fashionably phrased, en-bon-point.

What an age of intellect do we live in! Could our good old Druidical ancestors have supposed that their puny and degenerate offspring would be endowed with the extraordinary gift of being able to rejuvenize old worm-eaten nuts? Rare and sublime discovery! What, John, may we not next expect? Surely, we have reached the millenium of the march of intellect and the perfection of sophistication. But I must not keep the reader longer in suspense.

The rejuvenization of Old Nuts! Just as I had finished writing the above article, an old and almost forgotten friend called on me, one who has long and scientifically been patriotically engaged, “in this age of intellect,” in rejuvenizing old, rotten, worm-eaten walnuts and almonds, of each last year’s growth, and giving their “externals” all the whiteness and beauty of the lily-white hand of a “fine lady,” and their “internals” all the plumpness and en-bon-point admired by his “most moral majesty,” our late “gracious and beloved sovereign,” in his “fair defects of nature.” By this scion of “the trading interests” I am informed that old nuts of all kinds are first soaked in water in order to plump them out, and then they are fumigated with sulphur for the purpose of rendering the shells white and clean.


SECTION VII.
Confectionary, Pastry, and Perfumery.

The confectionary-artist is not behind his compeers in trade in the honourable vocation of sophistication. There are few articles which owe their paternity to his handy-work, that partake wholly of the ingredients to which they bear resemblance in name and appearance: all, almost all, here is the work of “the black art.”

But this is not the worst part of the business. Were any person to be admitted into the “elaboratorical pandemonium” of a pastry-cook or a confectioner—were he to see the disgusting appearance of the vessels in which they manufacture their articles—many of them containing the ingredients with perfect rims of cupreous matter surrounding them—were he to regale his eyes with the sight of the most rancid butter bleaching for the purpose of making pastry, as I have seen, I am sure that he would hold the productions of the confectioner and pastry-cook’s shop in abhorrence, and would not consider Dr. Paris’s denunciation of them, in his useful work on Diet, p. 247, as “an abomination.” A lady with whom I am acquainted, and who lodged at different times in the houses of confectioners and pastry-cooks, had so good an opportunity of witnessing the cleanliness and wholesomeness of their operations, that for many years she has not tasted any commodity that comes out of their manufactories; and I verily believe that she would die of hunger before she could induce herself to allow a scrap of their delicacies to enter her mouth.

But these “artists” not only endanger the health and lives of their customers by the carelessness and nastiness of their conduct in their compositions, but they employ preparations of copper, and also of red lead in colouring their fancy sweet-meats. In the preparations of sugar-plumbs, comfits, and other kinds of confectionary, especially those sweat-meats of inferior quality, frequently exposed to sale in the open-streets, for the allurement of children, Mr. Accum, p. 288, informs us, that the greatest abuses are committed by means of powerful poisons. The white comfits, called sugar-peas, are chiefly composed of a mixture of sugar, starch and Cornish clay (a species of very white pipe-clay); and the red sugar drops are usually coloured with the inferior kinds of vermillion or sap green, and often, instead of those pigments, with red lead and copper. As a yellow colour, cromate of lead is used, and prussiate of iron as a blue. The stuff called “hard rock,” “hard bake,” “white lollypop,” and other baby attracting names, is of an equally deleterious quality. Nor are the ginger-bread or sweet cakes of the ginger-baker less injurious to the health of children, especially the “gilt ginger-bread” as it is termed, which is covered with Dutch leaf,—a composition consisting of an alloy of copper and zinc, or brass and copper. Indeed, all parents should, as the author of “The Oracle of Health and Long Life” observes, anxiously instruct their children never to buy any thing offered for sale in the streets: among my acquaintance more instances than one have occurred in which lamentable results would have been the consequence had not timely aid been afforded the little sufferers. And for the same reason it seems necessary to caution parents never to give painted toys (which are always coloured with red lead, verdigris, and other potent poisons,) to children, who are apt to put every thing, especially if it gives them pleasure, into their mouths.

The mischievous consequences occasioned by the use of sugar confectionary, coloured with metallic and vegetable poisons, are provided against by the French Government, by being under the surveillance branch of the police, entitled the Council of Health, by whom an ordonnance is issued, that no confectionary shall be sold, unless wrapped up in paper, stamped with the name and address of the confectioner; and the ordonnance further provides that the vendors shall be held responsible for all accidents occasioned by confectionary sold in their shops. M. Chevallier has, in the Journal de Chimie MÉdicale for Jan. 1831, discussed this subject with considerable ability.

“The foreign conserves, such as small green limes, citron, hop-tops, plumbs, angelica roots, &c. imported into this country, and usually sold in round chip boxes, are frequently impregnated with copper.” Indeed, most of the delicacies and “good things” to be obtained in confectioner’s shops, are tinted with all the colours of the rainbow, by the agency of lead, copper, brass, arsenic, or some other poisonous metal.

The presence of lead and copper is readily detected by pouring liquid ammonia over the article suspected of being adulterated with the first mentioned metal, which will acquire a blue colour; and sulphuretted hydrogen, acidulated with muriatic acid, where the second article is suspected to have been made use of in the adulteration, when the article will assume a dark brown or black colour. The adulteration by means of clay may be ascertained by dissolving the suspected article in boiling water, when the sediment or precipitate at the bottom of the vessel ready discovers the fraud.

For the purpose of communicating an almond or a kernel flavour to custards, blanc-mange, and other productions of his art, and to render them grateful to the palates of his customers, the pastry-cook flavours them with the leaves of the poisonous plant, the cherry-laurel. And the basis of his favourite blanc-mange often consists of the shreds of the dried bladders of horses, the skins of soles, and other animal membranes, as cheap substitutes for isinglass. Among his less objectionable sophistications may be mentioned, his fabrication of creams, custards, tarts, and other kinds of pastry, from rice powder and skimmed milk.

The negus and lemonade made by pastry-cooks, and the punch of public and coffee-houses, are made of tartaric acid, as a cheap substitute for citric or lemon acid.

The perfumers, the keepers of the “emporiums and bazaars of fashion,” the manufacturers of the “best genuine bears’ grease,” of the “incomparable Macassar Oils”—of the “Kalydors”—of “Les Cosmetiques Royales”—of the “Red and White Olympian Dews,” and other prodigiously grand and etymological titles “breathing the spirit of patriotic rivalry,” have all exerted their respective wits in the art of economising expense and “saving a penny.” In fact the tooth-powders, the dentrifices, the ottars of roses, the musks, the cosmetics, the lotions, the balsams, the Hungary waters, the Eaus de Cologne, as well as all the other frenchified eaus, the milks and creams of roses, the pomades divines, the blooms, the pearl-waters, the lip-salves, the perfumes,—the Naples almond and beautifying soaps,—the cephalic, Macouba, and other-hard named snuffs, are all vile sophistications, and (to omit speaking of their injurious properties to the health and the skin,) contain but little of the ingredients of which the artists profess that they are made. On this subject I shall address myself especially to my fair readers: craving leave to premise, that it is strange that British ladies, to whom Nature has been so bountiful, should destroy their native charms and have recourse to the wretched substitutes of art, which are destructive of beauty, and produce real deformity.

As many ladies attempt to improve their complexions by the use of the pernicious cosmetics, which are continually and unblushingly advertised as beautifiers of the skin, most of which are either worthless or dangerous, (for if they have any effect, it is that of conveying mercury, lead, or bismuth into the system, and too frequently laying the foundation of diseases which are often dangerous, and sometimes fatal;) I cannot refrain from advising those “fair ones” who have been in the habit of using trash of so villainous a nature, that if they have any of it by them, to throw it away at once, and to be persuaded that the best cosmetics are exercise in the open air, an active attention to social and domestic duties, regular hours of repose at night, and cheerful hilarity and tranquility of mind, and that those cheap and wholesome remedies will not, as the author of “The Toilette Companion” well observes, fail to animate their countenances and beautify their complexions beyond the blooms and the balsams, the Grecian and the Egyptian Waters, the Kalydors and the Macassar Oils, the Gowland’s Lotions and the Pearl Powders, the Cosmetiques Royales, the Red and White Olympian Dews, the Essences, the Eaus, and the Pomades Divines, the Essences Apolloniennes or Tyrian, and the Tonic Wines, and all the other puffed and delusive nostrums, that knavery, cupidity, and effrontery, have ever palmed upon a credulous public, by which dull and lustreless eyes, sallow and shrivelled skins, lifeless and cloudy complexions, and impaired and ruined health, are infallibly super-induced: or those simple and easily purchased ingredients, with a strict attention to cleanliness, that is, well washing the skin every day, and drying it with a course towel,—or when the head, neck, or face perspire, rubbing it dry with a towel of the like description, will, as the author of “The Oracle of Health and Long Life” says, more effectually beautify the complexion, preserve the skin pure, soft, and pervious, and consequently the health firm and unaffected, than all the frauds that have ever been contrived to cheat and deceive the unwary or the inexperienced. Cold water, however, should not be used when the skin is warm, nor very warm water when it is chilled. For as the author of that clever little work “The Toilette Companion, or The whole Art of Beauty and of Dressing,” says, “Many a beautiful face, neck, and arm, have been spoiled by not observing this caution.”

I have mentioned the dangerous consequences from the use of the repellent cosmetics and other quack nostrums puffed off in the newspapers; but, as example is more convincing than precept, I shall present my readers with a few cases of their lamentable results, which fell under the observation of the celebrated Dr. Darwin.

“Mrs. S. being much troubled with pimples, applied an alum poultice to her face, which was soon followed by a stroke of the palsy, and terminated in her death. Mrs. L. applied to her face for pimples a quack nostrum, supposed to be some preparation of lead. Soon after she was seized with epileptic fits, which ended in palsy and caused her death. Mr. Y. applied a preparation of lead to his nose to remove pimples, and it brought on palsy on one side of his face. Miss S. an elegant young lady, applied a cosmetic lotion to her face for small red pimples. This produced inflammation of the liver, which required repeated bleedings with purgatives to remove. As soon as the inflammation was subdued, the pimples re-appeared.” (Darwin’s Zoonomia.) Every person could enlarge this catalogue from the sphere of his own acquaintance.

I am willing to believe that I have (to use a legal phrase) made out a sufficient case to prove the inefficacy, nay the dangerous consequences of cosmetics, and the rest of the long list of et-ceteras for beautifying the skin. It will now be my duty to direct my attention to the other frauds and impositions practised under the titles of “hair strengtheners”—“hair beautifyers”—of “best genuine bears’ grease”—of “incomparable Macassar Oils”—of “Pommades Divines,”—and the remaining hair hoaxes and humbugs, played off as hair oils, Russia oils, and similar puffed nostrums, under pretty and taking titles, by Prince, Ross and Son, M’Alpine, and the rest of the bear’s grease and hair-oil men; and I shall feel a singular pleasure should I be the medium of saving any “lovely or loveable woman” from becoming the dupe of imposture and deception.

Amongst the various cosmetics recommended by the adventurer for the dressing room, it must be admitted that none seems more harmless than those which profess to give a fine curl to the hair. But to assert that any liquid will, of itself, give a permanent or temporary curl to the hair is fallacious; though it is true that the application of a weak soap lye, or a solution of caustic potash, will render the hair more susceptible of adopting the artificial curl given by putting it into papers. But then it must be recollected that the effect occasioned by soap lye or potash is only produced by a complete alteration of the organic structure of the hair, superinducing a slow but certain destruction of that beautiful ornament of the human head. This effect may not be immediately observed, either in youth or in advanced life; but it is certain and inevitable.

Equally destructive are the various liquid dyes so loudly boasted of, and extensively advertised, by quacks for colouring the hair; some of them, indeed, do produce the effect proposed, particularly the black dyes; but they are all injurious, especially the black, as their basis consists always of nitrate of silver, (that is, silver dissolved in nitric acid or aqua-fortis) or lunar caustic when in a dry state; but the operation is destructive of the hair, as must be evident to any one who has seen the effect of caustic on warts on the skin. It has been well said that if we wish to save our hair, we must first save our money, by abstaining from the whole list of those puffed and unprincipled recipes and nostrums that stare us in the face in every newspaper, and in almost every shop-window.

The folly of giving credence to any of the impudent and disgraceful impostures for the pretended power of certain ingredients to change the colour of the hair, must, as the author of The Toilette Companion observes, be evident to every person when he is told that the hair depends on a peculiar secretion, and that, when that secretion ceases, which it does from several causes, as grief, fright, ill health, great mental exertion, age, &c. the hair becomes grey: “for Nature, like a provident mother, when she feels the powers of life impaired or decaying, exerts all her energies to support and preserve the vital organs, and can no longer, from her limited means, supply the outposts and ornamental parts of the system as before, which therefore suffer and are sacrificed.”

Nor are the deceits of the base nostrum-mongers for making the hair grow and curl, or for making the bald pericranium of a nonagenarian vegetate in all the luxuriance of rejuvenization, the only frauds practised: equally destructive are the advertised depilatories, the general basis of which is yellow orpiment, a certain poison if taken inwardly. It is true that the Turks, with whom bald heads are in fashion, and also the Chinese, do use this as an unguent, to save the trouble of frequent shaving; but it should be recollected that those cosmetics which may be harmless on the head of a robust Janissary,—of a bashaw of three tails or a fat Mandarin, do not necessarily become fit adjuncts for the toilette of a “British fair,”—“the lovely daughters of Albion, Erin, or Scotia,” or even that of an “Herculean delicate,” a Lilliputian dandy, or a Bond-street exquisite.

Snuff-sniffers and tobacco-munchers and puffers, do ye know what the delectable ingredients which form part of the articles of your recreation, are? Have you never heard that snuff is often compounded of pulverised nut-shells, of the powder of old rotten wood, called powder post; that the colour is improved by ochre, and the appearance and feel modified by an addition of treacle or urine? And have you never been told that the pungency of snuff is increased by the agency of powdered glass or the muriate of ammonia? Tobacco smokers and “chawers,” have ye never been told that your favourite “quid” is often composed of black hellebore, corrosive sublimate, dried dock-leaves, and a variety of other innocent ingredients? Oh, dear! what a deal you have yet to learn before you “become wise as serpents!”


SECTION VIII.
MEDICINES;
MEDICAL EMPIRICISM,
AND
QUACKS AND QUACKERY,
REGULAR AND IRREGULAR,
LEGITIMATE AND ILLEGITIMATE.

Devoted to disease by baker, butcher, grocer, wine-merchant, spirit-dealer, cheesemonger, pastry-cook, and confectioner; the physician is called to our assistance; but here again the pernicious system of fraud, as it has given the blow, steps in to defeat the remedy;—the unprincipled dealers in drugs and medicines exert the most diabolical ingenuity in sophisticating the most potent and necessary drugs, (viz. peruvian bark, rhubarb, ipecacuanha, magnesia, calomel, castor-oil, spirits of hartshorn, and almost every other chemical preparation in general demand;) and chemical preparations used in pharmacy; and the fraud has increased to so alarming an extent, says Mr. Accum, and his assertion is borne out by the experience of every one familiar with chemistry, that nine-tenths of the drugs and medicines in use that are vended by dealers, even of respectability and reputation, according to the usual interpretation of those words, “and who would,” as that gentleman emphatically expresses himself, “be the last to be suspected,” are adulterated. And what tends to aggravate the evil is that manufactories and mills on “an amazingly large scale” are constantly at work in this metropolis for the manufacture of spurious drugs. From these licensed elaboratories of disease, the adulterated articles are vended to unprincipled druggists, at less than a third of the price of the genuine article. And as there are no certain tests or methods of detecting the fraud, the consequence is, that the physician’s prescription is rendered useless, and the most consummate skill often baffled in the subjection of disease. Some idea of the extent of the adulteration of drugs may be formed, when it is stated that a spurious peruvian bark is sometimes sold, compounded of mahogany saw-dust and oak-wood, ground into powder, with a proper proportion of genuine quinquina; and that magnesia, even the calcined sort, is adulterated with lime.

Chemical cunning has even contrived to extract the quinquina, in which consists the whole virtue of the bark, leaving it a completely inert mass. And even the quinine itself is sophisticated, being frequently contaminated with lime, tallow, sugar, and sulphate of cinchonas.

It is necessary also to make some little inquiry, and use some little exercise of one’s understanding, in ascertaining for what reasons certain physicians recommend particular druggists, and particular drugs which are manufactured by the “said particular” druggists. Dr. Reece, in his Monthly Gazette of Health for August 1829, has tended to open one’s eyes a little on the subject. He informs us that the late Ambrose Godfrey, the nostrum-monger, contrived to get his preparation of arrow-root into notice and sale at double the price for which it might have been obtained of any other druggist, by accompanying samples of his commodity with presents of haunches of venison to certain physicians, and that by judicious repetitions (“neither few nor far between”) of the said conciliating haunches of venison, he contrived to maintain the reputation and supposed superiority of the said arrow-root, and to keep the monopoly to himself, as all the said learned and grateful physicians always, as in due allegiance and duty they were bound, recommended the said Godfrey Ambrose’s arrow-root as superior to that of all other simple wights, who supposed that their composition of arrow-root could be good for any thing, if they forgot, or were not able, to give character to the commodities by means of the mute but irresistible influence or eloquence of the said judiciously disposed-of haunches of venison. From this account it appears that the “sons of Galen” and the artificers of “the pestle and mortar” are not behind their brethren of “the long robe,” and “of the quill and parchment tribe” in the “art of huggery.” How often has a “learned barrister” contrived to get into the good graces of an attorney and secured practice by invitations to dinner, and judiciously and well timed (for few persons are better versed in the art of throwing a sprat to catch a whale than a hungry and briefless, and it must be admitted, often highly gifted barrister;) presents of game, by a hearty and unseen shake of the hand in the street, which he dared not have given at Westminster Hall, and by all those ingenious means, to which men of great talent have before now condescended, and by which men of little talent have sometimes gained considerable fortunes.

Nor has the spirit of adulteration allowed even the accredited patent or quack medicines to escape its ingenuity. Dr. James’s Fever Powders, and Norris’s Fever Drops, besides a variety of other popular receipts, are to be obtained in all possible degrees of strength and flavours from the various venders and manufacturers of the articles.

Even the simple articles arrow-root, worm-seed, Spanish liquorice, lemon acid, soda water, lozenges, honey, spermaceti, and a long list of other commodities in general use, receive the benefit of the sophisticators’ ingenuity.

The greater part of the commodity sold under the name of arrow-root in the shops of the druggists and grocers is prepared from the fecula or starch of wheat and of dry mealy potatoes, with a portion of arrow-root. When good, the grains of arrow-root are very fine, with numbers of little clots which are formed by the aggregation of the minuter grains while the commodity is drying, and when examined by a magnifying glass appear pearly and very brilliant.

The seeds of the tansy are often offered for sale, for worm-seed; but the more conscientious dealer sometimes treats his customers with an equal portion of the genuine and the adulterated article.

The Spanish liquorice juice of the shops is generally composed of the worst kind of gum arabic, called Indian or Barbary gum, and imported chiefly for the purpose of making shoe-blacking, with a small portion of the genuine juice; and the factitious composition, when inspissated, is formed into rolls, resembling the genuine article imported from Catalonia, nicely sprinkled or stratified with particles of dry bay-leaves, and skilfully impressed with the word “Solaz,” in the true cast of Spanish engraving. Refined liquorice is frequently manufactured from Spanish juice, with an equal quantity of carpenters’ glue or starch. The specimens of genuine juice are generally small, perfectly black, brittle, and break with a smooth and glassy fracture. They are also soluble either in the mouth or in water, without leaving any residue.

The lemon acid of commerce is, as I have before said, a counterfeit; tartareous acid being employed as a cheap substitute for lemon or citric acid.

The soda-water on general sale is frequently contaminated with copper and lead, produced from the action of the carbonic acid contained in the water on the metallic substances of which the apparatus in which it is made is constructed.

The lozenges of all varieties, hues, flavours, and qualities, particularly those in the composition of which ginger, cream of tartar, magnesia, &c. are used, are sophisticated with a liberal portion of pipe-clay, as a cheap substitution for sugar; but this fraud is readily detected by laying one of the suspected lozenges on the pan of a fire shovel or sheet of iron made red-hot; when, if it be pure, it will readily take fire and be consumed, but if it be adulterated, it will burn feebly, and a hard strong substance will remain, resembling the lozenge in form.

It is well known that but little genuine honey can be obtained in London. The tests of good honey are its fragrance and sweetness. When it is suspected to be adulterated with starch or bean flour, the fraud may be discovered by dissolving the honey in cold water, when the flour will be readily seen, as it will not dissolve, but falls to the bottom of the vessel in powder. If honey thus adulterated be exposed to heat, it soon solidifies and becomes tenacious.

Honey is of three kinds; the first, called virgin honey, and which is of the finest flavour, is of a whitish cast, and in a fluid state, about the consistence of a syrup. The second is that known by the name of white honey, and its texture is almost solid. The third kind is the common yellow honey, obtained from the combs, by heating them over the fire, or by dipping them into hot water, and then pressing them.

Manna is sometimes counterfeited by a composition of sugar and honey, mixed with a small portion of scammony.

The adulteration of spermaceti is generally effected with wax; but the fraud may be detected by the smell of the adulterating ingredient, and by the dulness of the colour; whereas pure spermaceti is of a semitransparent crystalline appearance. It is also said that a preparation of the oil obtained from the tail of the whale is likewise vended for genuine spermaceti; but, as this factitious commodity assumes a yellow shade when exposed to the air, this imposition is also of easy detection.

The adulteration of the essential oils obtained from the more expensive spices is so common, that, as Mr. Accum says, “it is not easy to meet with any that are fit for use,” and so much subtle ingenuity is made use of in the sophistications, that no known tests or agents exist for the detection of the fraud. The only certain tests are the taste or flavour, and the smell.

It is worth while to attend to the plausible excuses of the respective “artists” of these sophistications. They allege that they are obliged to have recourse to the fraud, to meet the fancies “of those clever persons in their own conceit who are fond of haggling, and insist on buying better bargains than other people, shutting their eyes to the defects of an article, so that they can enjoy the delight of getting it cheap; and secondly, for those persons, who being but bad paymasters, yet as the manufacturer, for his own credit-sake, cannot charge more than the usual price of the articles, he thinks himself therefore authorized to adulterate it in value, to make up for the risk he runs, and the long credit he gives;”—they therefore are reduced to the necessity of keeping, as they term it, “reduced articles,” and genuine ones. This is excellent logic, and no doubt well understood by the whole sophisticating tribe. The public are indebted to Dr. T. Lloyd for this information, which he communicated to the Literary Gazette, No. 146.

The ready methods or tests for ascertaining the good qualities of the most common drugs are:

Castor-oil, when good, is of a light amber or straw colour, inclining to a greenish cast. That which has the least smell, taste, and colour, is considered the mildest. The necessity of some attention to these signs may appear, when I state that I once took seven ounces of this oil in successive doses, and do verily believe that I might have continued to this present hour taking, daily, the usual dose furnished from the same quarter, with as little effect, had not my good genius directed me to send for an ounce from Apothecaries’ Hall. I recommend my readers to purchase their drugs, &c. in the same place.

Ipecacuanha.—As this drug is sold to the public in a pulverized state, there is no short or off-hand test for discovering its purity. It is adulterated with emetic tartar.

Opium.—Good opium in a concrete state should be of a blackish brown colour, of a strong fetid smell, a hard viscous texture, and heavy; and when rubbed between the finger and thumb, it is perfectly free from roughness or grittiness. This drug is liable to great adulteration, being frequently vitiated with cow-dung, or a powder composed of the dry leaves and stalks of the poppy, the gum of the mimosa, meal and other substances. The flavour alone indicates the goodness of opium in a liquid state.

Rhubarb.—The marks of the goodness of rhubarb are the liveliness of its colour when cut; its being firm, dry, and solid, but not flinty or hard; its being easily pulverizable, and appearing, when powdered, of a fine bright yellow colour; and its imparting to the spittle, when chewed, a deep saffron-colour, and not proving slimy or mucilaginous to the taste. When rhubarb has become worm-eaten, druggist-ingenuity is called into play, by filling up the holes with a paste made of rhubarb-powder and mucilage; and then the physic-artists roll the mended pieces in the finest rhubarb powder to give their handy works a good colour and an appearance of freshness.

Senna leaves are frequently mixed and sophisticated with leaves of argol, box leaves, &c.

But among the frauds and impositions practised on the public, none are more odious and unprincipled, and, at the same time, more loudly call for the prompt and active interference of the Legislature, than the tricks and effrontery of impostors, quacks, and empirics in medicine, both regular and irregular. It cannot but have been the frequent subject of regret to every honest and reflecting person that this vile trade should receive a legal sanction and protection, which it most assuredly does by virtue of the stamp duty imposed on the villainous trash; and it cannot be sufficiently deplored that any government should find itself reduced to straits so deplorable, or be so short-sighted in its views of enlightened policy, as to be under the necessity of extracting a paltry and disgraceful profit to the revenue of the state, from the tolerance and encouragement of ignorance, imposture, and mischief.

The assertion is true, that those pests of society the charlatans and nostrum-mongers “quarter” themselves only on the ignorance and credulity of mankind, and that their patrons and supporters are wealthy but ignorant men, and superstitious old women, or profligate and thoughtless rakes; but this is a miserable excuse, and but lame kind of reasoning: if it means any thing, it proves the necessity of public protection from the abominable and anti-christian nuisance. Can there be greater libel on the utility and operation of English law, than that vermin of the description of the “Balsam of Rackasiri” empirics[M] should be tolerated and allowed to spread their mischief and destruction among the population of a country professing Christianity and civilization, and forsooth, to boast of “the thousands they pay yearly to the government and the public press,” in the form of duty to the one for its sanction and licence, and to the other in the form of remuneration for giving a disgraceful and destructive publicity to their nefarious designs.[N]

Nor is the absence of a proper discrimination between right and wrong of a certain prating brazen-faced

“barrister” less reprehensible. I love and venerate “the Bar;” but I must be free to say that when a man can be found so devoid of just and proper feeling as to appear, for the paltry remuneration of a few pounds, or for any remuneration however large, in the defence and propagation of naked and disgusting fraud and peculation—aye, and the secret and wide-spreading destruction of health and life too!—it evidently proves that there are some members of that distinguished profession who are not possessed of the high and honourable feelings which belong to those who are gentlemen by birth and breeding, scholars by education, and Christians and honourable men from moral and religious feeling. But it is to be hoped that there will never occur again a similar exhibition to that which took place at Marlborough-street on the infamous Rackasiri-balsam fraud, practised on Miss May, by “the learned graduates of Petticoat-lane,” and “regularly bred physicians,” the Jew pedlars and old clothesmen “of wonderful abilities,” the “Doctors” C. and J. Jordan; who “feel awkwardness in recommending to public notice their uncommon discoveries and talents.” The more I consider that transaction, the more I am satisfied that the magistrates are to blame for having allowed the piece of impudent effrontery and imposture to have had the semblance of their sanction, by their singular taciturnity which happened on that occasion. Of the newspapers which gave currency and circulation to the artful and fiend-like exculpation, language will not afford terms strong enough to express one’s abhorrence and indignation. O shame! where is thy blush? How much human misery and destruction has the insertion of those disgraceful and wicked puffs occasioned, by inducing the weak and credulous to give credit to that as a piece of intelligence coming from editors of accredited and impartial journals, which is merely the contrivance and fabrication of wicked impostors to delude and ensnare the thoughtless and unsuspecting; and for the giving of its mischievous publicity, the proprietors and editors of certain newspapers received large sums of money. But let those thoughtless men reflect, that it is the very consummation of cruelty and unprincipled conduct to sanction the infamous tampering with the lives and happiness of one’s fellow creatures for the mere sake of lucre. Nor is the conduct of the magistrates of certain police offices (particularly those to whom the jurisdiction of the city of London is entrusted) less reprehensible, and less fraught with mischievous consequences. What! ought the frauds and murderous designs of the basest miscreants alive to receive the solemn and imposing sanction and authority of an oath made before a judicial tribunal? Surely a grosser violation of duty and a more stupid and reckless indifference to the destruction of human health and life, were never, in the most barbarous country, and the most uncivilized age, exhibited, than the want of sense and foresight displayed by some city-magistrates in allowing affidavits to be made before them of the “wonderful cures” performed on the deluded and perjured agents and “stalking horses” of the empirics and impostors; but, fortunately for mankind, the culpable act will ever remain on record as a stigma and reproach of city-legislation and moral economy. The trade of legalized poisoning and destruction of public health has received greater and more effectual help and recommendation from that source than from all the arts and devices of the impostors, though aided by the sanction of a government duty, and the disgusting and unprincipled puffs and paragraphs of a certain portion of the public press. To put an end to these culpable and mischievous proceedings, either on the part of magistrates or of editors of newspapers, in future, I wish those gentlemen to bear in mind that their “misdoings” shall entitle them to a “niche and an escutcheon of immortality” in the pages of “Deadly Adulteration and Slow Poisoning Unmasked;”

and that no threats or intimidations of “actions” and “reparations due to the wounded feelings of gentlemen,” shall deter me from my duty. If I should offend, of course the courts of justice are open to every injured man, and he will most assuredly receive his due measure of justice there; but should I give that offence for which the “law of the land” affords no redress, the man of honourable feelings and conduct shall never have to complain of my backwardness to give a most prompt and satisfactory reparation; but, at the same time, I wish that those who have been privy, whether by overt or covert acts—whether from their love of “filthy lucre,” or their natural propensity to fraud—to the destruction of the lives or health of their fellow-creatures, to recollect that I shall be prepared to treat them with the scorn and contempt which their conduct and their misdeeds may merit.

It has been well said that it is not easy to determine whether the fraud and impudence of the empiric or nostrum-monger, or the folly and credulity of the sufferer, are the greater. But the fact is that quacks and impostors of all kinds, whether medical or political, pÆdagoguecal or corporational, live and thrive on the infernal popish maxim, that ignorance is the mother of devotion, that is, in plainer phrase—of gullibility. But to the case of the quacks.—It surely indicates no ordinary share of dupery, to believe that one and the same nostrum can cure all and every disorder contained in the long catalogue of human woes and miseries; such a belief must incline the victim of its hallucination to suppose an exact similarity of symptoms and a perfect identity of nature in all the disorders to which the frailty of our common nature has rendered us subject. On this momentous subject few persons have written more forcibly than the admirable author of the “Manual for Invalids.” May the following quotation from that valuable work awaken the attention of those who foolishly confide their health and lives to the care of quacks, nostrum-mongers, jugglers, and impostors![O]

“Where dwells the boasted march of intellect when the understanding is continually insulted with the most impudent and daring pretensions of impostors, who, while they pretend to restore your health, are making a direct attack upon your credulity and your purse. What encouragement exists for the well educated men, regular graduates of Universities, of high classical and literary attainments, who have chosen the profession of medicine or surgery as a business of life, and in order to practice with credit and character, have directed their attention, their time, and their property to its studies,—who have made the nature of diseases and the efficacy of remedies a study of life—when they find themselves completely superseded by some inspired pretender—some ignorant quack. Lord Bacon has long since said, in his work on the advancement of learning, ‘If the same honours and rewards are given to fools, which ought to be awarded to the wise, who will labour to be wise?’ That the ignorant pretender should be encouraged by the public, is a reproach to the understanding of any people; but that the revenue of any country should be supplied by a stamp duty[P] on empirical nostrums, instead of the government taking measures either of prevention or punishment, can only be explained by exhibiting similar acts of atrocity on the sentiments of nature; but the truth is, the auri sacra fames has the power of making that appear relatively right, which is absolutely wrong.”[Q]

“Beware of hypocrisy of every description,” adds the same excellent writer; “you may as well believe that the Pope can send you to perdition, as that an advertising charlatan can, by any empirical nostrum, restore you to health.”

But, unhappily, it appears that poor John Bull and “his hopeful family” are not gifted with the power of being “beware of hypocrisy,” “advertising charlatans” and “empirical nostrums;” but that through their proneness to gullibility and the love of the marvellous, the trade of quackery is daily increasing, and that hundreds of quacks swarm in every quarter of the metropolis, and fatten on the murders which they are constantly perpetrating with their poisons; and to add to the monstrous combination against the lives and health of the community, that the aid of even the pulpit is invoked to further the propagation of the imposture! Instances are on record where mercenary preachers have been wicked enough to sermonize and expatiate on the miraculous virtues and benefits of the poisonous nostrums[R] and remedies of the mountebank jugglers and impostors.

But humbug and imposture, as it has been truly said, is a many-headed monster, and is of very catching influence; it has worshippers at the corner of every street; hordes of the most ignorant vagabonds and jugglers are engaged in its propagation, and announce their impostures as “prepared and sanctioned by His Majesty’s august authority;” but to waste my pages with the mention of the “ladies’ fever” doctors Lamert, Peede, Davis, Eady, Caton, Courtenay, (alias Messrs. Currie and Co.) Fiedeberg (alias Sloane and Co. alias Jones and Co.);—the surreptitious knights, His Carpentership, Sir Gully Daniels, and his Plastership, White Arsenic Sir Cancer Aldis;—the firm of Goss and Company, the consulting Surgeons of Ægis and Hygeiene notoriety;—the miniature painter, “the learned and celebrated” artful artist and curer of consumption, Long St. Long,—the crazy chap who entitles himself the “hygeist”[S]—Taylor and Son, the Leake’s pill-men,—Samuel, the syphilis-pill-man,—the old canting staymaker and life-guardsman, Gardner, who can manufacture tape-worms wholesale and of a league in length from the intestines of cats and chickens,—the piddle-taster, or morning water-doctor, Cameron (alias Crumples,) as also all other quacks, whether of the masculine or feminine gender, who cure by proxy, or by simply pronouncing that the disease shall be cured, (for there have been impostors impudent enough to make such pretensions;) or by any art or delusion, and who by chalk, chuckling, and chicanery are battening on the vitals of society, would be an insult to the understanding of my readers, further than to say that each of those worthies, as well as their honourable compeers the balsam of Rackasiri vagabonds and impostors, can, no doubt, recognize the reality of their deeds in the following quotation from the pages of Hudibras:

“Nor doctor epidemic.
Stored with deletery med’cines,
(Which whosoever took, is dead since,)
E’er sent so vast a colony
To both the under worlds as he.”

Perhaps a few words said on the subject of the former occupations of some of the mountebank impostors, who are practising, and have practised their frauds and villanies on the community, may tend to open the eyes of this very gullable nation as to the extent and quality of their medical knowledge, unless it should be supposed that they acquired it by miraculous inspiration or divine influence, to which high pretensions, indeed, many of the vermin have had the audacity to lay claim, well knowing that the bolder their assertions were, the more gullable they would find their ninny patients.

Know then that the “groundly learned physicians” —“of superior skill and judgement”—high character and situation,” the Doctors Mordecai J. and C. Jordan, were Jew pedlars; (and here, reader, recollect that more than one half of the mountebanks and impostors who have gulled and laughed at our gullable nation, are or were circumcised Jews, either of native or of foreign breed;)—the renowned Doctor Eady, of cyprianic memory, and who owed his reputation to the joint exertions and recommendation of the saints of Providence Chapel, and the coal-heaving-preaching-and-praying-sinner-saved Huntingdon, was a bumpkin haberdasher and retailer of small wares in an obscure country village;—Monsieur John St. John Long, the celebrated curer of consumption, was a dauber in the miniature-line;—the once celebrated, and now warmly nestled and scoffing Doctors Brodum and Solomon were, by turns, porters either in a drug warehouse or Jew pedlars; the canting worm manufacturer in Long Acre was a staymaker and life-guardsman;—Yankee noodle do Whitlaw and Don celestial Graham filled the honourable posts of a day labourer and tom-fool to a strolling company of players;—and many of the by-gone mountebank vagabonds were cobblers, tailors, weavers, footmen, blacking-makers, cat’s-meat men, &c. &c. &c.: but they all, during their tremulous career of iniquity and canting,

“———— Making sanctity the cloak of sin,
Laugh’d at the fools on whose credulity
They fattened.”——

The sanction and encouragement given to quacks and quackery in this country have long and loudly been stigmatized by foreign writers as a national opprobrium to Britain; and it must be allowed very justly. The increase of these vermin and pests of society has long been a disgrace to the legislature and government of the country. “They manage these things,” as Sterne says, “better in France.” How careful our neighbours are of the health of their community may be gleaned from the following paper lately read before the Royal Academy of Medicine, at Paris:—

“1st. That for several centuries, by the vigilance of the administration, in concert with the most distinguished medical men, the strongest efforts have been made to rid society of the pestilence constantly springing up from secret remedies. 2dly. That the most favourable circumstances are at present combined to free them from the tribute of money and life, which, on no consideration, ought longer to be tolerated.”

It is to be hoped that our government will be influenced by like motives and follow the glorious example of our neighbours. If they want precedent,—the great bugbear of improvement either in morals, politics, law, religion, or even common sense, in our error-ridden nation, history furnishes us with sufficient examples. But, while those methods and laws are being planned and prepared, let us, in the mean time, resort to the good old practices of correcting and punishing the jugglers of the present day.

In the reign of Edward VI. one Gregg, a poulterer, in Surrey, was set in the pillory at Croydon, and again in the Borough of Southwark, during the time of the fair, for cheating people out of their money, for pretending to cure them with charms, by only looking at the patient, and examining his water. In the reign of James I., an order of council, founded on the statute of Henry, granted to the College of Physicians, was issued to the magistrates of the city of London, for the apprehension of all reputed empirics, to bring them before the censors of the College, in order to their being examined as to their qualifications to be trusted either with the lives or limbs of the subject. On that occasion several mountebanks, (among others, Lamb, Read, and Woodhouse,) water casters, ague charmers, and nostrum venders, were fined, imprisoned, and banished. This wholesome severity, it may be supposed, checked the evil for a time; but in the reign of William III. it became again necessary to put the laws in force against those vermin; in consequence of which many of them were examined, and confessed their utter ignorance even of reading and writing. Some of the miscreants were set in the pillory, and some were put on horse-back with their faces towards the horses’ tails, whipped, branded, and banished.

In Stowe’s Annals is to be found an account of a water caster being set on horse-back, his face towards the horse’s tail, which he held in his hand, with his neck decked with a collar of urinals, and being led by the hangman through the city, was whipped, branded, and afterwards banished. One Fairfax, in king William’s time was fined and imprisoned for doing great damage to several people, by his aqua celestis. Antony, for his aurum potabile; Arthur Dee, for advertising remedies which he gave out would cure all diseases; Foster, for selling a powder for the green-sickness; Tenant, a water doctor, who sold his pills for 6l. each; Ayres, for selling purging sugar plumbs; Hunt, for putting up bills in the streets[T] for the cure of diseases; and many others, were all punished, and compelled to relinquish their malpractices.

But it is not only the interloping quack—the irregular and illegitimate charlatan and self-dubbed doctor that does mischief and destroys the health of the public, but the “regular” and legitimate pretender to medical knowledge, or as they have been significantly and appropriately termed by Dr. Morrison, the “roturiers,” or dabblers in physic, often do not much less mischief. The following extract from the Manual for Invalids is so much to the purpose, that the wider its circulation can be promoted, the greater good will be produced to society at large.

“In the restoration of health, the poor often try the efficacy of the wine vaults and the medical wisdom of the druggist, who flourishes greatly in low neighbourhoods, in the metropolis, and even in some large provincial towns. These men, whose solitary qualification for this honest mode of existence has been commonly an apprenticeship behind the counter, have often placed in imminent peril many a valuable life. Sometimes it has occurred that a shrewd boy, employed to clean bottles and sweep out the shop, has received an intuitive call, and has felt himself fully qualified for the important office of recovering and regulating the health of many invalids. The writer has a knowledge of a general practitioner of this description who was received behind a druggist’s counter in the manner before related, and perhaps, learning audacity from his late employer, has obtained, through the medium of puffing friends, a surreptitious reputation, and is cried up by those worthies as a very skilful, even a “delightful” and “fine” man, particularly for nervous invalids, and more especially for the disorders of women and children.”

Thousands and thousands of the population of this blessedly gifted country in medical science, are killed by this disgraceful quackery of the drug-shop, and the iniquitous drug-jobbing of apothecaries. What murders, what numerous murders have those men to answer for by their careless and injudicious use of powerful medicines—calomel and opium! But perhaps they console their unfeeling and selfish hearts with the miserable subterfuge that they are merely removing that portion of the increasing population which is the great bugbear, that is hourly threatening to eat up Mr. Parson Malthus and his believing disciples by wholesale.

But the prescribing druggist, the drugging apothecary, and the soi-disant surgeon are not the only regular and legitimate quacks; we have quack physicians, who by the remittance of the enormous sum of £15 to a Scotch university are entitled, legally and professionally, to tack the wonder-working cabalistical initials M.D. to their names, and are then entitled to kill the king’s liege and loving subjects, “secundum artem,” with licensed and legitimate potion, pill, and draught; who to return obligations to their “pals” the apothecary and surgeon, prescribe draughts by the quart and the gallon—bleeding, blistering, and purging, ad infinitum. By these mystified and jabbering doctors, whose little-or-no wisdom consists in foolish words of little or no meaning, and dog Latin, or disputes about precedence and the receipt of fees, the laws of vital existence and the astonishing functions of the animal economy, are understood by hearsay and inspiration!

This statement of the general ignorance of the medical profession is not exaggerated. “Five sixths of the medical profession,” says Dr. Morrison, in Medicine No Mystery, “know little or nothing of the science of life.” The cause of this lamentable ignorance arises from the abominable and disgraceful system of medical education in vogue, according to which the bought and sale prices of the current drugs, and the art and mystery of dispensing medicines often constitute the whole and sole knowledge of those who are entrusted with the health and lives of their fellow-creatures; in whose bungling and self-interested practice hearsay and precedent supply the place of experience, and by whom signs and symptoms are mistaken for causes. Another cause is the deplorable deficiency of the public in the knowledge of medicine. Were the principles of medical science to form a part of general education, the public would be enabled to select well educated and honest medical men, and escape the fangs and delusions and murderous acts of quacks and impostors, whether interlopers, or those who are enrolled in one or other of the medical institutions of London. It really seems an anomaly in the pursuit and attainment of knowledge that a man should conceive it necessary to be able to judge whether his shoe or his cravat is made in a good and workman-like manner, but of that science which treats of himself, and with which his health, his life, and all his comforts are so intimately and seriously connected, he should be in the most abject state of ignorance, and, unhappily, not hesitate to avow that ignorance! But while it is an incontrovertible truth that the community in general should have some knowledge of medicine, in order to enable them to judge of the qualifications of their medical attendants, (to the attainment of which knowledge popular medical writings, such as Dr. Kitchener’s Art of Invigorating Life; Sir John Sinclair’s Code of Health and Longevity, Dr. Reece’s Medical Guide, and the Oracle of Health and Long Life, or Plain Rules for the Preservation and Attainment of Sound Health and Vigorous Old Age, and a few others, are calculated to afford the most effectual help;) it must be deeply regretted by every well disposed member of society, to observe books got up by rash and inexperienced persons, professing to give directions for the management of health, which are filled with the crudest and the falsest instructions, the nature and consequence of which are decidedly destructive of health, if not of life itself. And what must add to that regret, is that the title-page and covers should be blazoned with the professed sanction and recommendation of a late eminent medical practitioner. But surely that gentleman could never have read, among many other dangerous fooleries and extravagancies, the silly and monstrous instructions to sleep with open windows, to swallow as much salt as possible, &c. &c. &c. or if he did read them, it is but an act of courteous feeling towards him to suppose that he did not comprehend their purport. Another circumstance deserving reprobation respecting the means which have been taken to get that ill-judged little book into circulation has been the profuse and repeated attempts of a portion of the public press to give it notoriety and circulation. It certainly savours a little of presumption, that those who have not made the science of medicine a study or a profession, should venture to give opinions of the merits or demerits of a work professing to treat of the momentous subjects of health and life. These remarks are not made in any petulant feeling. I believe the author to be a well-intentioned though a misguided man, and as he hints that he published his work with the hope of adding to his income from the profits, I sincerely wish that he had chosen a subject for which he may be more competent, as then I should have been relieved from the necessity of making these remarks, in the expression of which a sense of public duty has alone actuated me. It gives me, however, great satisfaction to draw the public attention to the masterly abstract of Cornaro’s Treatise appended to the book, and which, from its disparity of style, is evidently written by another person. It is no extravagant praise to say that the public is under infinite obligations to the able and experienced writer who made that valuable addition to the book. Comaro’s works may now be read with advantage by every one, as it is freed from the disagreeable prosings, tautologies, and incongruities which pervade that work. It is to be hoped that the proprietor of the book will favour the community with its publication in a separate form.

Considering the severity of the remarks I have made in the preceding pages on the medical profession, it may be supposed I have set myself up in opposition to medical men of all descriptions. I have no such intention. The intelligent and skilful physician and surgeon I reverence, and only wish that the following observations were not a true portrait of their often unsuccessful progress.

It is certain no body of men can produce more noble instances of integrity, liberality of mind, and strength of intellect, than the Professors of Physic; but, as with other bodies of men, this high character will not apply diffusedly. To find, therefore, a fit person with whom to intrust our health, is not an easy matter. Fortunately, however, for the profession, people are not very fastidious on this point; and if they or their friends are but sent to the grave in a regular way, they bear the load of ills which their own follies and the ignorance of the practitioner may have heaped upon them, with great philosophy, imputing the whole to the natural order of things. Indeed, to judge of the merits of a medical man is extremely difficult; and, when we see one man ordering away, with contempt, the medicine which another has thought a specific, and pursuing a totally different course, we are forced to conclude that education alone will not make a physician. Reputation is not unfrequently got without merit, for who is to judge? Accident, solely, both with the drug and the doctor, has often been the maker of their fame. This may be exemplified by an anecdote of a deservedly eminent physician, which, though perhaps it has been often related, is not less to the point. The doctor happened to be sent for one evening, after having indulged at a convivial meeting, so that by the time he had been whirled to his patient’s door, he was very ill qualified to decide in a case of difficulty. Having made shift to reach the drawing room, and seeing a lady extended on a sofa, assisted by a female attendant, he, by a sort of mechanical impulse, seized her hand; but finding himself utterly unable to form an opinion on the case, he exclaimed, “D—— d drunk, by G—d!” (meaning that he was in that unfit state) and immediately made the best retreat he was able. Feeling rather awkwardly at this adventure, he was not impatient to renew his visit; but being sent for on some other occasion, he took courage, and was preparing an apology, when the lady presently removed his apprehensions, by whispering these words in his ear—“My dear doctor, how could you find out my case so immediately the other evening?—It was certainly a proof of your skill, but for God’s sake not a word more on that subject.” Thus, the doctor added to his repute by a circumstance which might have endangered that of a less fortunate man. This, though a ludicrous event, may serve, as well as a graver one, to elucidate the fact that many owe their celebrity, not so much to any judgement of their own, as to a want of it in others. As it is with other professions, so it is with physic. Many of its professors possessing great skill are doomed to pass their lives in obscurity, whilst they see others, of inferior knowledge and judgement, rise to importance. It has been truly said by one who was not unacquainted with the causes of medical success or failure, that, “Even among the regularly bred physicians accident will often accomplish what merit strives for in vain; and those coincidences of circumstances which frequently elevate one man and depress another in the medical art, are more the production of what is called chance, than from any extension of mind, or any peculiar tact or skill in the art of intellectual combinations.”


SECTION IX.
COALS.

There are few trades in which greater frauds are practised than in “the coal trade.” The dealers in the “black diamonds” are versed in all the allowable legerdemain and trickery of “auld England’s honest tradesmen:” the most skilfully initiated in the art of sleight-of-hand would find himself at fault in attempting to rival the dexterity of the true “son of the coalshed,” under the old rÉgime of measuring, in ingeniously tossing his “spadefuls” into the measure so as to enable “the darlings” to lie lightly and “go far,” and assume the form of a solid cone, while the hollow cavity within proved as treacherous to any one treading on its “well raised summit,” as if he had put his foot on the surface of a quagmire. Nor was the well-fed, gaily clothed, richly lodged coal-merchant, with his “extensive concerns” to be easily “out-done” in well devised craft and contrivance: nicely pinched sacks, not foolishly flapping inwards so as to betray the precise amount of their contents,—well planned deliveries, either so early in the morning that the heads of the family might prefer the arms of Morpheus to the hazard of being choked with volumes of coal dust, or so late in the evening, that there might be a possibility of their being engaged in the “solid recreation” of their dinner, were a few of the demonstrations of generalship frequently exhibited by this portion of “the monied interest” and “great capitalists of the nation.”

But to come to the point in hand. An honest writer on the subject, Mr. Eddington, in his Treatise on the Coal Trade, p. 94, informs us that the keeper of a coalshed felt himself dissatisfied with his measure, if in doling out his article to his poor, half-starved, shivering neighbours, in pecks, half pecks, or bushels, he could not measure out at the rate of forty-two bushels from every chaldron of thirty-six bushels; without taking into consideration the gain to be obtained from vending the inferior coal, and the consequent increase of quantity by throwing a few bushels of sifted ashes, pieces of stone, bones, or any other commodity which will assume a black form after having been well rummaged among the heap of coals.

Another great source of unfair profit arising to the vender of coals is the “Macadamizing” of them, and like true “nursing fathers” carefully and sedulously giving them their due quantum of moisture. For under the old rÉgime of measuring, the cunning varlets knew full well that by the greater number of angular points that they were able to produce, they filled their measure with the least possible quantity of coals. This paternal fulfilment of the command “to increase and multiply” they still piously and faithfully observe, as the greater progeny of small bits and dust that they can produce from a lonely and solitary lump, the more they will be able to increase the weight by their considerate and frequently repeated waterings and drenchings. Accordingly they set their shoulders to the work, and patriotically and radically proscribe every rebellious lump in their shed, by smashing it into as many figures as possible, often exceeding in number the ever varying mutations of the kaleidoscope, or Orator Hunt’s two hundred thousand unity tales. Nor are their “betters” “the merchants” less skilled in the art. Those considerate and sharp-sighted gentry, foreseeing that the large masses and blocks which are delivered out of the ships into their barges, round as they came from the mine, would be an inconvenience to their customers, and probable tumble on some fair and delicate damsel’s toes, kindly set to work, and smash away; so that when the round coals of every chamber, containing the ingrain of five chaldron and a half, have undergone the process of their friendly thumpings and republican equalization, they will measure out again from six to six and a half chaldrons. The increase by breakage appears by the following statement from Dr. Hutton’s Mathematical Dictionary: “If one coal measuring exactly a cubic yard (nearly equal to five bolls) be broken into pieces of a moderate size, it will measure seven bolls and a half; if broken very small, it will measure nine bolls.”

And even after the coals have gone through the conjuring process of being increased in bulk by the aforesaid smashing or Macadamising art, and have reached their destination at the wharf, the ingenuity of “the monied interest” and “the great capitalists” is still at work. Careful that the purchaser may not be put to the trouble of wetting his coals to make them cake and burn well, those considerate and obliging gentlemen relieve him from the task by scientifically wetting the commodity; and as a reward for their well intentioned and meritorious labours they generally contrive to produce, as Mr. Eddington informs us, “from six to six and a quarter, or even six and a half, chaldrons from each room,” containing five and a half chaldron of smashed or “macadamized” coals. A correspondent to the World newspaper for September, 1829, who signs himself a Coal Merchant, says that instances are on record where eighty and even ninety sacks have been measured out of a room of coals!

According to the new rÉgime of weighing, (which has already proved one of the most deceitful hoaxes that ignorance and cupidity ever contrived against the interests of the poor,) the quantity is increased in a like proportion in favour of the coal dealer.

Another hint or two on this matter may be of some service to thee, friend Bull. Always recollect, John, in the purchase of your coals, that you pay attention to the season of the year; for there is with every article a cheap season and a dear one, and with none more than with coals: by purchasing at the proper season, often from twenty to thirty per cent. are saved. The method of purchasing should always be considered; for by purchasing a room of coals, which is called pool measure, two fourths of a chaldron is often obtained in every five chaldrons; for a room of coals contains in general from sixty-three to sixty-eight sacks. Therefore, where the quantity is too much for the consumption of one family, two or more should join together in the purchase.

But the legislature, that is, “the collective wisdom of the nation,” aware of thy disposition to gullibility, has, John, taken thy affair of coals into its paternal and law-making consideration, and has made some regulations, as to the possibility of thy receiving “good and lawful” weight. They are as follow:—To ensure lawful weight to the purchaser, and prevent frauds in the sale and delivery of coals, the vender of all coals exceeding 560lbs. is to cause the carman to deliver a paper or ticket to the purchaser before he shoots any of the coals out of his cart or waggon, specifying the number of tons, the description of the coals, and the weight of the sack. And a weighing machine is to be carried in such cart or waggon, with which the carman is directed to weigh gratis the coals contained in any one or more of the sacks which the purchaser or his servant may require to be so reweighed. But no ticket is necessary to be delivered with coals purchased at the “Coal Market,” or with coals exceeding 560lbs. purchased in bulk from any vessel or wharf, if purchasers do not require a ticket. The seller of the coals not sending a ticket and a weighing machine with the coals, and the carman not delivering the ticket, or neglecting or refusing to weigh the coals, are subject to distinct penalties.

No less than seventy-seven kinds of sea coal are brought to the London market; forty-five of which are imported from Newcastle, and the rest from Sunderland. The best of the Sunderland produce are Stewart’s main, Lambton’s main, and Hetley main, or as they are more generally termed in imitation of the old Russell Walls End, Stewart’s Walls End, &c. The Scotch and Staffordshire coals are inferior to the sea coal both in durability and the heat which they give, being about one-third less productive in those qualities than the Newcastle and Sunderland varieties.

The test of good coal depends on the burning, and the quantity of bitumen it affords in its combustion; and no bad signs of its inferiority are that it is dull, small, stony, or slaty. But the quality of coals is in a great measure determined by the weight; for there often occurs a difference of 30lbs. weight in two sacks of different qualities, though equally filled: largeness of size is no proper criterion, for the inferior coals are often of the largest size.


SECTION X.
Painters’ Colours or Pigments, Hats, Broad Cloth, Kerseymeres, Linens, Laces, Cambrics, Silks, Jewellery, Stationary, &c.

The spirit of adulteration pursues poor John even into his domestic arrangements. Should he design to decorate his dwelling—“his neat suburban cottage”—and have the walls or wainscot of his drawing-room painted a delicate pink colour to rival the carnation tints of the cheek of his “cara sposa,” or those of his breakfast parlour, to imitate the lively blue of the bright eyes of his “lovely cherubs,” the vile sophisticators mar all his wishes, and he is able to obtain nothing else than dull and darkling daubs. In fewer words, he cannot obtain genuine colours wherewith to have his house painted. And this sophistication does not only extend to the common house-paints, (as where white lead is mixed with carbonate or sulphate of barytes; vermilion with red lead, and a long et-cetera;) but should honest John wish that his hopeful progeny may rival the Zeuxis or Apelles of antiquity, or confine his paternal longings to the more modern artists—a Reynolds, a Gainsborough, a Moreland, or a David,—he has the mortification of seeing his fond illusions dissipated by the adulterating manufacturers of ultramarine, carmine, lake, Antwerp blue, crome yellow, Indian ink, and all the other et-ceteras of artist-decoration.

The covering of even John’s sconce is not exempt from sophistication. In the room of the dear bought, far fetched beaver, the adulterators adorn John’s pate with a strange combination of wool and the homely and cheaply purchased fur of the rabbit and mole. This, it must be admitted, is cruel usage of the good old gentleman, and must, as the witty author of the Indicator says, bring to his mind an odd association of ideas, (namely, of cheatery and forgiveness,) in one of those communings with his hat’s lining, while, like a polite worshipper, he is whispering his preparatory ejaculations, before he turns round with due gravity and composure, and makes a bow of genteel recognition of the Mr. and Mrs A. and the Misses B. who have assembled in the pew before him.

Nor is he better treated by his clothier or man’s mercer. Not to mention the slight texture of the articles, and the substitution of inferior materials for the “best superfine Spanish” and the “super-extra Saxony,” the sly varlet artfully stitches the selvage of broad cloths, kerseymeres, and ladies’ “extra superfine,” dyed of a permanent colour, to the edge of cloth dyed with a fugative or fading dye; and this operation is performed with so much skill and nicety as to elude John’s most penetrating optics.

Neither are Mrs. Bull and her “lovely daughters” more exempt from the knaveries of the linen-draper, the dealers in laces, veils, silks, “Cashmere shawls,” French cambrics, and the other paraphernalia of the female wardrobe: they are all sophisticated, and often no more like the native article than “the moon is like green cheese.” Like “a true bred knight,” I shall not forget to furnish the female part of Mr. Bull’s family with the means and criteria for judging of the goodness of those commodities, in the work which, as I have before said, I have nearly ready for press. Nor shall I omit to take notice in the same publication, to give directions for the proper selection of the articles of furniture of the old gent’s house; such as feathers, blankets, carpets, &c. &c.

While gallantly professing my knight-errantry in the cause of Mrs. Bull and “her lovely daughters,” I find that I have made an unpardonable omission—not a word on laces and muslins! To propitiate their “kind consideration,” I hurry to supply the unpardonable omission. Let then every “lovely fair one” know that laces are now generally made from single cottons (instead of good double thread, as was formerly the case), and in order to make them look fine and clear, they are stiffened with starch, which occasions the delusive articles, as soon as they are washed, to fall to pieces. In some articles of lace, particularly veils, many of the springs and flowers are fastened on with gum, which, as soon as they are wetted, immediately fall off and betray the cheatery. Caps and other articles of female habiliments sold in the streets, are often united together in the most ingenious manner by means of gum or paste.

Muslins are not free from sophistication-ingenuity. Poor, thin, rough specimens are rendered stiff, high glazed, and thick with a quantum sufficit of pipe-clay, &c.; sometimes a paper-pulp is spread over the deteriorated article; and the fibres of the cotton which ought to be dressed off, are left in order to hold the composition put in.

Stockings are often rendered stiff and thick to the feet, by bleaching them with brimstone. And coarse woollen cloth receives the addition of large quantities of fuller’s-earth to give it body and closeness; while the right or pressed side is finished off with oil, in order to give the cloth a fine, soft, and smooth appearance. Never choose woollen cloth which is glossy and stiff.

“The frauds committed in the tanning of skins, and their conversion into leather; and in the manufacture of cutlery and jewellery,” says Mr. Accum, “exceed belief.” And I can assure my readers that that gentleman is not mistaken in his assertion; and, had he added that of cabinet wares and silver plate of all sorts, he would not have over-stepped the limits of truth. To those acquainted with the manufacture of silver goods, it is well known that you cannot always be sure that the various costly articles are of the legal standard with which Pride and Vanity, Luxury and Fashion, when they “set up for Gentry and Stylish people,” and have a desire for “shewing off,” gratify their whims and fantastic notions of gentility, and their ambition of “outplating and outdishing” their friends and neighbours. The prosecution instituted some years ago against a “legitimate” son of Crispin for the manufacture of shoes, the soles of which were ingeniously united to the welts by only six stitches in each shoe, while the external parts of the soles exhibited evident traces of a multiplicity of stitches rivalling the number of the stars of the firmament of the heavens in extent and variety, and their exact mathematical precision seemed to display the exertion of the genius of a Euclid, cannot have slipped the recollection of all my readers.

And to complete the climax of sophistication, even the paper on which John gives birth to his “winged words,” and expresses his indignant feelings at the extent and the audacity of the frauds and impositions practised on his good-nature and credulous disposition, is sophisticated. In the manufacture of paper, a large quantity of plaster of Paris is often mixed up with the paper-stuff, instead of its consisting of good linen rags only, and the foreign substance is added to increase the weight of the commodity. Nor is he, when, like ourselves, desirous of having his thoughts and discoveries rendered “enduring for ages,” (monumentum Ære perennius,) by having them cast in stereotype, and thus “save a penny,” exempt from the designs and contrivances of sophistication;—the founder deceives him by casting his “words that breathe and thoughts that burn” in a metal as soft and ductile as lollipop. Thus honest Bull is circumvented in all his intents, and surprised and overpowered at every turn by the Genius of Sophistication.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           

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